Money making advice

[Nick]

Well if Berek comes here, of all places, to get chicken rearing advice ( ) I can do this.

Work is quiet. Cash running low.

I was awake in the night (as always) actually wondering about performing a bank robbery. I had got halfway to working out the perfect plan then fell asleep.

So come on. Post your money making schemes and scams!

[Snoopy]

Well you could have a shower and try the Town Hall steps. Take vaseline

[Nick]

That's the sort of thing.Paving stones, potholes, liquid on the floor in Tesco!

Pastis might benefit from this too

[Berek]

print up some Nelson Mandella t-shirts ready for when he drops dead

[Snoopy]

If it's quick readies you need you could do worse that taking a lot of tat to a car boot sale  

For longer term Tesco are always looking for shelf fillers but get there before the 6th formers all flock in for their summer jobs. Security Companies are always looking for staff at this time of the year as holiday cover. Mostly night work ~ 12 hour shifts but it pays around £300 a week.

And Berek is not as silly as he pretends either.

[Nick]

print up some Nelson Mandella t-shirts ready for when he drops dead

 

[The Moan Ranger]

Repossession/empty property management.

Get a deal with a big lender (who I work for) and then all you have to do is go in once the property is vacated, drain the water system down, splash a load of beige paint over the walls, tidy the garden and job done.

Oh - and get a locksmith to change all the locks.

You get about three grand per property.

[Nick]

 

[The Moan Ranger]

Northern Ireland is a particular hotspot at the moment.

[Snoopy]

Now that sounds like a good way to make some money and get your legs broken at the same time.

[Nick]

That's what I thought. I have worked in Northern Ireland a few times. Very odd place

[Snoopy]

Having, in past recessions, been called upon by various lenders to "secure" premises from which debtors had been evicted I can assure you that some are more than capable of returning in the night with baseball bats, a gallon of unleaded and a box of matches. In N'orn Ireland they do that sort of thing for sport to people with whom they share an accent and upbringing. What they would do to an Englishman caught up in such circumstances does not require much imagination.

[The Moan Ranger]

My company has repossessed over 100 over there recently without incident. Times have changed.

[Snoopy]

And are Englishmen running the security side of things by travelling over or is it a local "security outfit" (otherwise known by their initials)?

[The Moan Ranger]

The company I set up will be called "Ultimate Vacation Force". Won't cause problems, will it?