The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Snoopy on August 07, 2007, 08:04:52 AM
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No not yet but it has been decided that today is the day to visit all those stores advertising "Back to School" and re-equip the trio in readiness for the September restart.
The children are in revolt but SWMBO is determined to avoid the last minute rush. The newly nine year old says he is going to do stretching exercises every day so that anything bought now will not fit him by Sept. Six year old wants to know why he cannot wear his favourite tee shirt every day to school "'cos uniforms are daft" and fourteen year old daughter is ever keen to shop (aren't all females) but is adamant that she will NOT wear anything uncool.
Looks like it's gonna be a fun day. noooo:
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lol: lol:
I left equiping my two children to the ex. I just paid for it all. cry:
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lol: lol:
I left equiping my two children to the ex. I just paid for it all. cry:
It'll still be your fault. evil:
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It's what I'm here for. cry:
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we had a leaflet from ASDA through the door advertising their back to school range BEFORE the schools split up !
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point:
Back to school point:
All I have to do is equip Mr Wench with a new purple pen, lunch box and the now traditional new back to school tie! ::)
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point:
Back to school point:
All I have to do is equip Mr Wench with a new purple pen, lunch box and the now traditional new back to school tie! ::)
I have to buy:
3 Pairs of shoes (Black)
3 Pairs of trousers (Black or Charcoal Grey)
15 White Polo Shirts (5 v expensive because they have the school logo embroidered on them. Other 10 will come from ASDA)
15 Pairs Dark Grey or Black Socks
3 Sweatshirts (all v. expensive because of embroidered logos)
3 Pairs Trainers
3 Pairs PE shorts
3 PE Polo Shirts (In different colour from school shirts)
Sundry undies (No you may NOT wear a "Platform" Bra to school argument looming)
2 Pairs of Plimsoles (Boys have to change from outdoor shoes into plimsoles whilst within the school because of carpeted areas)
2 pairs football boots
Embroidered Labels and/or indelible pens for marking of all items.
PLUS
Replacement pens, pencils, geometry sets, batteries for calculators, bags to carry all this kit.
I foresee a life of penury. tunble:
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Why can't she wear a platform bra to school?
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Why can't she wear a platform bra to school?
(i) Because she is only just 14
(ii) She can't actually fill one
(iii) Because her father (ie me) said so
evil: evil: evil:
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Why can't she wear a platform bra to school?
(i) Because she is only just 14
(ii) She can't actually fill one
(iii) Because her father (ie me) said so
evil: evil: evil:
Well, (ii) makes sense I suppose. (iii) is crying out to be flaunted! eveilgrin:
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Why can't she wear a platform bra to school?
(i) Because she is only just 14
(ii) She can't actually fill one
(iii) Because her father (ie me) said so
evil: evil: evil:
Well, (ii) makes sense I suppose. (iii) is crying out to be flaunted! eveilgrin:
Oh believe me what she has is very much flaunted but I don't think it necessary at school. evil:
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At the risk of being over-informed, er,. what is a "platform bra"?
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All you ever wanted to know about bras
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brassiere_designs
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Not Nick and bras again whistle:
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Not Nick and bras again whistle:
For a grown man he is incredibly uniformed about some things. eeek:
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My uniforms are my business! evil:
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Not Nick and bras again whistle:
For a grown man he is incredibly uniformed about some things. eeek:
Should we start a thread - Things Nick might not know about
eyes:
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That would be helpful and informative. Feel free.
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Should we start a thread - Things Nick might not know about
eyes:
Judging from the constant barrage of calamities that occur whenever Nick is around is there going to be enough space on the server? point:
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Uninformed? Naive? Likes to hear you talk about such things? Kinky? rubschin:
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evil: Let the smiting commence. Or is that kinky too?
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here we are:
http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=913_1186472386
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WHen I was a child we were fond of a foodstuff, now vanished, known as blancmange. For some reason I find myself thinking of it now. confused:
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I havent had blancmange for years... whistle:
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Blancmange sick2:
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We have it every Christmas and for birthdays. In a rabbit shape. redface: It is getting harder and harder to track down though.
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We have it every Christmas and for birthdays. In a rabbit shape. redface: It is getting harder and harder to track down though.
eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.bellezaydietas.com%2Fproducts%2FRabbitVibrator.jpg&hash=d39208a2ddcf8c96c997ec9d829814b380c2ef54)
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Don't hunt for it ~ make your own. Oh and my mother had a rabbit shaped mould made out of aluminium. Every Sunday for tea. I hate the stuff.
Basic Dessert Recipes: Blancmange
Ingredients
60 ml (4 level tbsp) cornflower
568 ml (1 pint) milk
strip of lemon rind
45 ml (3 level tbsp) sugar
Method
1. Blend the cornflour to a smooth paste with 30 ml (2 tbsp) of the milk.
2. Boil the remaining milk with the lemon rind and strain it on to the blended mixture, stirring well.
3. Return the mixture to the pan and bring to the boil, stirring all the time, until the mixture thickens and cook for a further 3 minutes. Add sugar to taste.
4. Pour into a 600 ml (1 pint) dampened jelly mould and leave for several hours until set. Turn out to serve with fresh fruit
serves 4
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We have to have raspberry rabbit at Christmas with green jelly grass around it. Not your poxy lemon one.
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We have to have raspberry rabbit at Christmas with green jelly grass around it. Not your poxy lemon one.
These insights into the Wench household's domestic life are fascinating point:
If you want leave out the lemon and add some raspberry/strawberry whatever you like. My recipe does say "Basic Blancmange" right at the beginning.
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Yes but you can't just pop out to the shops and buy essence of raspberry can you? noooo:
I had my first Christmas not at home last year, do you have any idea how hard it is to track down the right sort of rabbit mold? Took me five sets of bids on ebay!
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Yes but you can't just pop out to the shops and buy essence of raspberry can you? noooo:
I had my first Christmas not at home last year, do you have any idea how hard it is to track down the right sort of rabbit mold? Took me five sets of bids on ebay!
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fthecookskitchen.com%2Fpics%2Fbig_6028.jpg&hash=e685dcac274aebce9f063d0bba29b58c6ddaff0e)
£2.99 from http://www.cakescookiesandcraftsshop.co.uk/aca
Or
£2.95 from http://thecookskitchen.com/pics/big_6028.jpg
There you are ~ yet more sites from which to add to your tat mountain.
And for your store cupboard
http://www.belvoirfruitfarms.co.uk/page.php?pid=78
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What is this thread about?It seems to have left the rails and started careering about the countryside.
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What is this thread about?It seems to have left the rails and started careering about the countryside.
I think you ran it off the rails in reply number 11... whistle:
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Not sure that any thread that runs to more than 1 page ever stays on topic.
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Not sure that any thread that runs to more than 1 page ever stays on topic.
at the BBC you'd get your arse slapped
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All I have to do is equip Mr Wench with a new lunch box
rubschin:
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Yes but you can't just pop out to the shops and buy essence of raspberry can you? noooo:
I had my first Christmas not at home last year, do you have any idea how hard it is to track down the right sort of rabbit mold? Took me five sets of bids on ebay!
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fthecookskitchen.com%2Fpics%2Fbig_6028.jpg&hash=e685dcac274aebce9f063d0bba29b58c6ddaff0e)
?2.99 from http://www.cakescookiesandcraftsshop.co.uk/aca
Or
?2.95 from http://thecookskitchen.com/pics/big_6028.jpg
There you are ~ yet more sites from which to add to your tat mountain.
And for your store cupboard
http://www.belvoirfruitfarms.co.uk/page.php?pid=78
It had to be the right sort of shape and none of those are. I picked one up for ?6 in the end. Thanks for the fruit link though.
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Originally I was moaning about school uniforms and the urgent need to pacify Mrs Snoopy with the purchase of large quantities of same today.
Seems that then Nick got hung up about the thought of my 14yo daughter's underwear and swiftly moved (no doubt by some mammary memory brought on by Berek's pictorial contribution) to his introducing the subject of blancmange. Wench chimed in with some happy childhood memories of Blancmange in bunny shaped moulds, there was a quick aside concerning Rabbits of a different nature before we got back to the Blancmange and raspberry cordial. At that point I sort of gave up because some workmen due on Monday next arrived to remove our old oil storage tank and I am now engaged in a heated debate about the base required for the new tank which they tell me is on route. It cannot however be fitted without a base which seems to have escaped their attention despite it being clearly stated in the agreed schedule of work.
The workmen having arrived all thought of a happy(?) afternoon in M&S et al have gone by the board.
As for my suggested bunny moulds being the wrong shape ~ what f***ing shapes do bunnies come in?
OK? All up to date now?
Onward and upward!
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Originally I was moaning about school uniforms and the urgent need to pacify Mrs Snoopy with the purchase of large quantities of same today.
Seems that then Nick got hung up about the thought of my 14yo daughter's underwear and swiftly moved (no doubt by some mammary memory brought on by Berek's pictorial contribution) to his introducing the subject of blancmange. Wench chimed in with some happy childhood memories of Blancmange in bunny shaped moulds, there was a quick aside concerning Rabbits of a different nature before we got back to the Blancmange and raspberry cordial. At that point I sort of gave up because some workmen due on Monday next arrived to remove our old oil storage tank and I am now engaged in a heated debate about the base required for the new tank which they tell me is on route. It cannot however be fitted without a base which seems to have escaped their attention despite it being clearly stated in the agreed schedule of work.
The workmen having arrived all thought of a happy(?) afternoon in M&S et al have gone by the board.
As for my suggested bunny moulds being the wrong shape ~ what f***ing shapes do bunnies come in?
OK? All up to date now?
Onward and upward!
lol: lol:
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At first glance I thought that bunny would was some sort of breastplate. It has nipples on its ears.
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As for my suggested bunny moulds being the wrong shape ~ what f***ing shapes do bunnies come in?
It had to be the exact same shape as Mother Wench's bunny. She and her three sisters were all furnished with the same one and it is that paticular bunny that always graces the Christmas table. I don't pretend that it is logical. redface:
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At first glance I thought that bunny would was some sort of breastplate. It has nipples on its ears.
Look .... to fill a mould you have to place it upside down.... with me so far. The "nipples" that you see are to ensure that the bunny mould will sit flat on a work surface so that you can pour in the jelly or blancmange where it will set.
Are you sure you are not still thinking of my daughter in a platform bra? evil:
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No, cos I still don't know what a platform bra is
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No, cos I still don't know what a platform bra is
Did you not click the sodding link? noooo:
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No, cos I still don't know what a platform bra is
http://www.bikiniscience.com/costumes/soutien-gorge_SS/shelfbra_S/shelfbra.html
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No, cos I still don't know what a platform bra is
One that pushes up to display the charms it contains to full advantage viz:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.diamondvues.com%2FHearts%2520On%2520Fire%2520Bra.jpg&hash=55b3543608f0ffb8e7e98e5e97fc12710bb61097)
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Berek's link appears to be to a structural engineering website confused:
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With my first daughter now thankfully all grown up it was a battle over high heeled shoes for school. Since she was 5'10" I could not see the point. With this one it is underwear ~ of a kind more normally associated with establishments off Wardour Street.
What ever happened to Clarkes Black Lace Up Shoes and a Liberty Bodice coupled by rubber buttons to navy blue knickers?
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No, cos I still don't know what a platform bra is
One that pushes up to display the charms it contains to full advantage viz:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.diamondvues.com%2FHearts%2520On%2520Fire%2520Bra.jpg&hash=55b3543608f0ffb8e7e98e5e97fc12710bb61097)
That's a balcony bra or balconette.
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No, cos I still don't know what a platform bra is
One that pushes up to display the charms it contains to full advantage viz:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.diamondvues.com%2FHearts%2520On%2520Fire%2520Bra.jpg&hash=55b3543608f0ffb8e7e98e5e97fc12710bb61097)
That's a balcony bra or balconette.
Don't get picky ~ Nick just wanted a Bra Picture
To spite you I shall also give him this:
http://www.npl-york.co.uk/PDFFiles/RegCat.pdf
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I thought we were meant to be educating not titilating! ::)
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Education then -
http://www.1-sexy-lingerie.org.uk/shelf-bras.htm
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I thought we were meant to be educating not titilating! ::)
I just knew you'd have to look ~ Nosey! point:
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I thought we were meant to be educating not titilating! ::)
I just knew you'd have to look ~ Nosey! point:
I am. It's a curse. sad24:
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I thought we were meant to be educating not titilating! ::)
I just knew you'd have to look ~ Nosey! point:
I am. It's a curse. sad24:
To be honest I've always seen it as one of your more endearing features. ;)
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I thought we were meant to be educating not titilating! ::)
I just knew you'd have to look ~ Nosey! point:
I am. It's a curse. sad24:
To be honest I've always seen it as one of your more endearing features. ;)
Bless. You wouldn't if I was always hounding you for information though. redface:
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I thought we were meant to be educating not titilating! ::)
I just knew you'd have to look ~ Nosey! point:
I am. It's a curse. sad24:
To be honest I've always seen it as one of your more endearing features. ;)
Bless. You wouldn't if I was always hounding you for information though. redface:
Two Wives, Two Daughters, Two Granddaughters ..... you think I'm not used to having my every utterance questioned?
I tell you if you think the shout of "Source?" in here (and the other place) is bad try a weekend in Snoopy Towers
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As for my suggested bunny moulds being the wrong shape ~ what f***ing shapes do bunnies come in?
It depends, are you talking about a regular rabbit or the vicious bunny of Caer Bannog.. whistle:
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WOMEN Banghead cussing: MRS NICK HAS GONE BONKERS> AND THER CATALOGUE ISN'T EVEN HERE YET Banghead Banghead Banghead
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Clarkes Black Lace Up Shoes and a Liberty Bodice coupled by rubber buttons to navy blue knickers?
cloud9:
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WOMEN Banghead cussing: MRS NICK HAS GONE BONKERS> AND THER CATALOGUE ISN'T EVEN HERE YET Banghead Banghead Banghead
Bonkers in what way this time?
What has she purchased this time?
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It concerned some paint.
OK?
( I fear she has Alzheimer's)
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( I fear she has Alzheimer's)
After watching that programme about Malcolm on ITV tonight, I very very sincerely hope she hasn't. noooo:
Sorry. This needs a completely different thread/discussion.
Carry on.
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WOMEN Banghead cussing: MRS NICK HAS GONE BONKERS> AND THER CATALOGUE ISN'T EVEN HERE YET Banghead Banghead Banghead
Ther ther Nick, calm down, think of a beautiful, serene swan, gliding over the surface of a lake.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.linsdomain.com%2Ftotems%2Fpictures%2Fswan.jpg&hash=092411f97dd358386fdd50cac42180dd16741cfb)
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It concerned some paint.
OK?
( I fear she has Alzheimer's)
What had you done with the paint?
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It is a very complicated story.
OK?
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It is a very complicated story.
OK?
We have nothing else to do ~ so spill the beans, you know you'll feel better when you have. whistle:
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It is a very complicated story.
OK?
As Snoopy said, it isn't as though I have anything better to do. So spill.
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I simply can't be bothered! ;)
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cussing: Bastardo cussing:
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I simply can't be bothered! ;)
I smite you for not bothering... point:
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I simply can't be bothered! ;)
Smited. evil:
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Also smitten.
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WOMEN Banghead cussing: MRS NICK HAS GONE BONKERS> AND THER CATALOGUE ISN'T EVEN HERE YET Banghead Banghead Banghead
Ther ther Nick, calm down, think of a beautiful, serene swan, gliding over the surface of a lake.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.linsdomain.com%2Ftotems%2Fpictures%2Fswan.jpg&hash=092411f97dd358386fdd50cac42180dd16741cfb)
...then being slaughtered, plucked and eaten by eastern european immigrants.
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It is a very complicated story.
OK?
EVERYTHING is complicated about you. ::)
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I will enlighten you when I see you!
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I will enlighten you when I see you!
How come he gets to know and I don't!?!?! evil:
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I will enlighten you when I see you!
How come he gets to know and I don't!?!?! evil:
Me Too? evil: evil:
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I will enlighten you when I see you!
How come he gets to know and I don't!?!?! evil:
Me Too? evil: evil:
Me three! sad32:
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I will enlighten you when I see you!
How come he gets to know and I don't!?!?! evil:
Me Too? evil: evil:
Me three! sad32:
Me four (a beer or two)
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I will enlighten you when I see you!
How come he gets to know and I don't!?!?! evil:
Me Too? evil: evil:
Me three! sad32:
Me four (a beer or two)
Me five, "Fess" up ... You know you want to tell... Barman evil: this Guinness has not traveled well. noooo:
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I will enlighten you when I see you!
How come he gets to know and I don't!?!?! evil:
Me Too? evil: evil:
Me three! sad32:
Me four (a beer or two)
Me five, "Fess" up ... You know you want to tell... Barman evil: this Guinness has not traveled well. noooo:
Who said it was Guinness? whistle:
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Hasn't the catalogue arrived yet?
Haven't heard of any volcanic-like activity from that part of the world yet.
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It should be here later if Posty ever arrives. ;D
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It should be here later if Posty ever arrives. ;D
?
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I will enlighten you when I see you!
Yoy saw me, but you didn't enlighten me. ::)
I think the subject of the 'impending pikey' invasion took over though tbh, plus he had to hurry off to........... mow the lawn! happy001
Mice ey? What would you do with 'em?
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doh: Did it arrive?
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It still hasn't come (so to speak) and now I am vexed about Lawnmower Repair Shops. There is a big one near us. All they do is sell and repair mowers. I took the allegedly dead mower there the other day and they said that they didn't repair "that sort". I took the other mower in there just now to get the blades sharpened. She said, "What is it?". I said, "A lawnmower". SHe gave me a withering look. "QUalcast. Oh, we don't repair that sort."
What blasted sort of lawnmowers do you repair then Mealors Lawnmower Repairs?
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It still hasn't come (so to speak) and now I am vexed about Lawnmower Repair Shops. There is a big one near us. All they do is sell and repair mowers. I took the allegedly dead mower there the other day and they said that they didn't repair "that sort". I took the other mower in there just now to get the blades sharpened. She said, "What is it?". I said, "A lawnmower". SHe gave me a withering look. "QUalcast. Oh, we don't repair that sort."
What blasted sort of lawnmowers do you repair then Mealors Lawnmower Repairs?
It?s obviously a ?front? for other illegal activities? whistle:
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Such a pity you didn't have any cutting remarks to hand. ::)
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evil:
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Such a pity you didn't have any cutting remarks to hand. ::)
drumroll:
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Go and get a new one from B & longQue then you tight fisted old sod.
Qualcast 'over mower thing for about 50 snotters IIRC. Doesn't have blades that need sharpening, just bits of plastic wingy cutty things that you replace every few times of use, and you get a bag of them for about a fiver.
Dead simple to do....for most. ;)
I'm here to help. Demo at 'The Swamp' if you want, but it'll cost you a pint.
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That may be an option. I sense a compulsory visit to B&Q coming on. Was trying to talk "Project Planning" about the dining room with Mrs Nick last night but for some reason she doesn't get "sequence of work".
You try it:
Fit new carpet
Destroy wall
Paint room
Buy rug
Replaster wall
Erect dining table
Fit shelves
Move piano
For me it is
8, 2, 5, 3, 7, 1, 6, 4
Does she get it?
noooo: noooo:
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Defer everything until she returns to work ~ then do it your own way.
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My plan precisely! lol:
It will, however, be all my fault. cry:
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Here's where to go when Mrs Nick and friends get the urge for more up-to -date & improved models.
http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/rabbit-amnesty/
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Crikey. So these cheap models are recycled? Do they have
germs
on them? eeek:
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Just read in the newspaper that A Summers are to introduce peep-holes in the fitting rooms of their shops, so men can give theie/approval/disapproval!
Also Nick should have a look at this - WOULD NOT OPEN THIS IN THE OFFICE THOUGH!
http://www.annsummers.com/betterthan/high.html
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Well if nothing else it will show him, once and for all, that it is ANN (with no bloody E) Summers ::)
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eeek:
Why is this in the "Back to School" thread?
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
Ann Summers
I have it now
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eeek:
Why is this in the "Back to School" thread?
shrugs:
Worrying isn't it
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Just read in the newspaper that A Summers are to introduce peep-holes in the fitting rooms of their shops, so men can give theie/approval/disapproval!
Also Nick should have a look at this - WOULD NOT OPEN THIS IN THE OFFICE THOUGH!
http://www.annsummers.com/betterthan/high.html
eeek:
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Is it back to school on Monday?
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Tuesday for most. All the parents round here look like shadows of their former selves. OUrs will have an extra week! Banghead Banghead Banghead
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An extra week of fun for you!
What could go wrong? whistle:
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It's the 10th here...but they start at 7.45am!!!
Wat too early for me. Roll on half term!
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just one more day to go here..
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Mr Wench is back today and the little darlings all troop back tomorrow.
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We have spent the afternoon arguing with weeping women and three elderly freemasons. It was chaos. The official representative of the Local Authority turned up to advise on procedure and they told him to "get stuffed". eeek: (this after having first questioned his identity and credentials). He was clearly enraged (rightly) and bigger guns are now being wheeled in. Sorry if this is abit cryptic, but you get the broader picutre!
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We have spent the afternoon arguing with weeping women and three elderly freemasons. It was chaos. The official representative of the Local Authority turned up to advise on procedure and they told him to "get stuffed". eeek: (this after having first questioned his identity and credentials). He was clearly enraged (rightly) and bigger guns are now being wheeled in. Sorry if this is abit cryptic, but you get the broader picutre!
Was this the Board of Governors?
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We have spent the afternoon arguing with weeping women and three elderly freemasons. It was chaos. The official representative of the Local Authority turned up to advise on procedure and they told him to "get stuffed". eeek: (this after having first questioned his identity and credentials). He was clearly enraged (rightly) and bigger guns are now being wheeled in. Sorry if this is abit cryptic, but you get the broader picutre!
I shall expect a telephonic update this evening.
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We have spent the afternoon arguing with weeping women and three elderly freemasons. It was chaos. The official representative of the Local Authority turned up to advise on procedure and they told him to "get stuffed". eeek: (this after having first questioned his identity and credentials). He was clearly enraged (rightly) and bigger guns are now being wheeled in. Sorry if this is abit cryptic, but you get the broader picutre!
Was this the Board of Governors?
Yes
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Ho did you know they were Freemasons?
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We have spent the afternoon arguing with weeping women and three elderly freemasons. It was chaos. The official representative of the Local Authority turned up to advise on procedure and they told him to "get stuffed". eeek: (this after having first questioned his identity and credentials). He was clearly enraged (rightly) and bigger guns are now being wheeled in. Sorry if this is abit cryptic, but you get the broader picutre!
I shall expect a telephonic update this evening.
Have everyone here, including the MIL evil:
But LEA wants to speak urgently tomorrow pm. Have another meeting in the morning. Try me PM
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Ho did you know they were Freemasons?
Three old lawyers in ther 60s. Blue suits. They had that look about them. Maybe Knights of St Vincent or summat. Arseholes to a man. Mrs Nick is thinking of turning Protestant. NO tangling now. I am fit to kill!
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Total chaos this morning. Had the pleasure of seeing loads of parents and kids who had turned up on the wrong day. Didn't help that the council had introduced controlled parking yesterday, great fun.
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I have one weeping and one very quiet one here.
1 hour 10 minutes to go.
I'll personally be glad when this annual 'going back' misery is all over.
Why is school so traumatic for most?
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My three were all slightly nervous this morning as it's a new start, new year, new teachers etc. All unknown quantities but at the same time they were looking forward to joining up with mates not seen for six weeks. By the time they reached the gates of the school the boys were already taking the p*ss out of anyone with "New Kit" whilst trying hard to look like seasoned pros themselves by scuffing their new shoes , school bags etc on the pavements and walls.
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Mr Wench was quite nervous too. Spent all morning ironing the packaging creases out of his shirt so the kids wouldn't take the piss. Didn't occur to him that the stain on his tie might cause more pointing than the creases. ::)
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Excuse my ignorance but wtf is an "inset" day? Usually think of this word as being something to to do with jewels.
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Excuse my ignorance but wtf is an "inset" day? Usually think of this word as being something to to do with jewels.
A Baker day... ::)
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Excuse my ignorance but wtf is an "inset" day? Usually think of this word as being something to to do with jewels.
"Training" Mr Wench's consisted of first aid. What to do if child chokes, bleeds etc. They have to spend six hours on it every two years. Complete and utter waste of time.
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Excuse my ignorance but wtf is an "inset" day? Usually think of this word as being something to to do with jewels.
A Baker day... ::)
In essence....a bit of a skive. scared:
Bit of a chin wag for half an hour, then down the ale 'ouse. happy088
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Excuse my ignorance but wtf is an "inset" day? Usually think of this word as being something to to do with jewels.
A Baker day... ::)
In essence....a bit of a skive. scared:
Bit of a chin wag for half an hour, then down the ale 'ouse. happy088
Mr Wench's lot were horrified because there "wasn't time" for a pub lunch! eeek:
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Excuse my ignorance but wtf is an "inset" day? Usually think of this word as being something to to do with jewels.
A Baker day... ::)
In essence....a bit of a skive. scared:
Bit of a chin wag for half an hour, then down the ale 'ouse. happy088
I have noticed the large number of teachers from Wallington Boys, who suddenly appear in the local Youngs hostlery.
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Excuse my ignorance but wtf is an "inset" day? Usually think of this word as being something to to do with jewels.
A Baker day... ::)
In essence....a bit of a skive. scared:
Bit of a chin wag for half an hour, then down the ale 'ouse. happy088
I have noticed the large number of teachers from Wallington Boys, who suddenly appear in the local Youngs hostlery.
There! Told you so! lol:
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Excuse my ignorance but wtf is an "inset" day? Usually think of this word as being something to to do with jewels.
A Baker day... ::)
In essence....a bit of a skive. scared:
Bit of a chin wag for half an hour, then down the ale 'ouse. happy088
I have noticed the large number of teachers from Wallington Boys, who suddenly appear in the local Youngs hostlery.
Indeed. In my local, the staff told me they arrived at noon and were still there when I left around 8.30. Most of them were off their tits, thus I fear the quality of education today will be somewhat compromised.
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We were all in the pub last night too. redface: Followed by the restaurant, followed by drinks at ours. redface:
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We were all in the pub last night too. redface: Followed by the restaurant, followed by drinks at ours. redface:
Were you the loud one with the Guinness top on?
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We were all in the pub last night too. redface: Followed by the restaurant, followed by drinks at ours. redface:
Were you the loud one with the Guinness top on?
No I was the terribly loud one with the pink top on. redface:
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We were all in the pub last night too. redface: Followed by the restaurant, followed by drinks at ours. redface:
Were you the loud one with the Guinness top on?
No I was the terribly loud one with the pink top on. redface:
Can't have been with the Wallington lot then - terribly loud but no pink tops.
In fact no bloody dress sense at all - do teachers have this expunged as part of their training?
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We were all in the pub last night too. redface: Followed by the restaurant, followed by drinks at ours. redface:
Were you the loud one with the Guinness top on?
No I was the terribly loud one with the pink top on. redface:
Can't have been with the Wallington lot then - terribly loud but no pink tops.
In fact no bloody dress sense at all - do teachers have this expunged as part of their training?
They would have you believe it is poverty but in reality many of them are still students at heart ~ even the 50 year olds. They have yet to realise that until they dress and behave like responsible adults with a job to do the children will not take them seriously.
The children, at most schools, have to conform to a uniform code but the staff turn up looking as if they are just calling in to collect their dole and then go back to bed ~AND they wonder why the children do not respect them?
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Well I saw Ms Grenfell earlier (Joyce's niece) and she is prepared to have him. And our money cry:
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The females are not so bad as the males, but still leave a lot to be desired.
There again, there were never any female teachers at my (all boys) school. Too much temptation for the priests I suppose.
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Well I saw Ms Grenfell earlier (Joyce's niece) and she is prepared to have him. And our money cry:
Good news (except for the money of course)
I trust she was smartly dressed. ;)
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She's a big girl eeek:, but very pleasant, thank you
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Sorry Nick. I really can't be arsed sifting through 10 pages of shite to discover who tf Ms. Grenfall (Joyces' niece) confused: is tbh.
Begsy syndrome you know. ;)
Summat to do with 'The School' up the road? 'The Boy' in then? happy088
If that's so, then a pint on you is now completely out of the question I suppose. ::)
Come up to 'The Swamp' at the weekend, and I'll make you a dripping butty and a glass of hot water to wash it down. sick2:
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An offer I can scarcely refuse. Can The Boy come to? We all lurve "Garden Festivals"
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An offer I can scarcely refuse. Can The Boy come to? We all lurve "Garden Festivals"
Ther's still a couple of abandoned 'scarecrows' lying around too, if he wants summat to play with. whistle:
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Like big voodoo dolls?
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First day back and the school have aleady phoned, I am not returning the call... whistle:
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Excuse my ignorance but wtf is an "inset" day? Usually think of this word as being something to to do with jewels.
A Baker day... ::)
In essence....a bit of a skive. scared:
Bit of a chin wag for half an hour, then down the ale 'ouse. happy088
I have noticed the large number of teachers from Wallington Boys, who suddenly appear in the local Youngs hostlery.
Aaaah! Wallington Boys cloud9: I still wear the old school tie....
Edit:
hang on... Oooops! I mean Wellington Boys... redface:
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First day back and the school have aleady phoned, I am not returning the call... whistle:
He could be ill, or they may need your permission to give him half a asprin. ::)
RING 'EM, or are you yet ANOTHER mouse in here?
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First day back and the school have aleady phoned, I am not returning the call... whistle:
He could be ill, or they may need your permission to give him half a asprin. ::)
RING 'EM, or are you yet ANOTHER mouse in here?
Unlikely there are any mice here - too many bloody cats.
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on past records I am sure it will be bugger all to do with him being ill..
I shall see when I pick him up at 3:30.. whistle:
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on past records I am sure it will be bugger all to do with him being ill..
I shall see when I pick him up at 3:30.. whistle:
Full written report to follow please.
We await the latest episode in eager anticipation to deflect the attention away from my old misery guts 'near' neighbour for a very short time. ;)
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It has HUGE kudos to be expelled on the First day back!
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First day back and the school have aleady phoned, I am not returning the call... whistle:
He could be ill, or they may need your permission to give him half a asprin. ::)
RING 'EM, or are you yet ANOTHER mouse in here?
Unlikely there are any mice here - too many bloody cats.
I bloody hate moggies too. evil:
I have a simple solution. char090
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi27.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fc172%2Fb0nz0%2F0827_wirepredators.jpg&hash=1ec0c80fc47234617bcdaf53131e7a8715690874)
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First day back and the school have aleady phoned, I am not returning the call... whistle:
You have my sympathies. Still waiting to hear from the bastard catholic mafiosi. Amazed that men still wear Brylcreem and ties with insignia on them evil:
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It was nothing to do with him..it was about my contribution to the school fund.. whistle:
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Cash or kind?
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It was nothing to do with him..it was about my contribution to the school fund.. whistle:
If you feel anything like me, tell 'em to F. OFF! evil:
I've had yet another row with Mrs Growler on this very subject. She won't cancel the annual subscription to them.
The head is a bread headed control freek twat, and that is just what what a couple of his ex members of staff told me on their departure day.
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I pay enough in taxes, one way or another, to cover the costs of the education of my children. It is the responsibility of the State to provide that education. It is enough that I have to get them there, in expensive uniforms (with extra plimsolls) and then listen to them repeating the twaddle that the so called "Educators" fill their innocent little minds with.
I refuse to pay EXTRA for an inferior service. Like I told the Head at my boys' school ~ I wouldn't give a tip for poor service in a hotel so I'm buggered if I am going to tip you for failing to teach my children properly.
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The "hols" drag on. And it's raining sad24:
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The "hols" drag on. And it's raining sad24:
Ah Ha ~ we are all back to school. cloud9:
Yes it is raining here too.
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The "hols" drag on. And it's raining sad24:
Ah Ha ~ we are all back to school. cloud9:
Yes it is raining here too.
It better stop for tomorrow. Growler Jnr. has got his 'field trip' measuring and looking at some rivers near Wrexham and Loggerheads tomorrow.
He's not happy, but it sounds like a damned good skive to me tbh.
Should have been back in July, but it was a bit wet then IIRC. rubschin:
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The "hols" drag on. And it's raining sad24:
Ah Ha ~ we are all back to school. cloud9:
Yes it is raining here too.
It better stop for tomorrow. Growler Jnr. has got his 'field trip' measuring and looking at some rivers near Wrexham and Loggerheads tomorrow.
He's not happy, but it sounds like a damned good skive to me tbh.
Should have been back in July, but it was a bit wet then IIRC. rubschin:
He should enjoy that ~ Loggerheads is great fun. My bunch love going there.
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The "hols" drag on. And it's raining sad24:
Ah Ha ~ we are all back to school. cloud9:
Yes it is raining here too.
It better stop for tomorrow. Growler Jnr. has got his 'field trip' measuring and looking at some rivers near Wrexham and Loggerheads tomorrow.
He's not happy, but it sounds like a damned good skive to me tbh.
Should have been back in July, but it was a bit wet then IIRC. rubschin:
He should enjoy that ~ Loggerheads is great fun. My bunch love going there.
Do you know, I've driven past the Loggerheads park hundreds of times on me way to Moel Famau, but never stopped their. Must go and have a sniff around some time.
The Loggerheads ale ''ouse is quite good IIRC. rubschin:
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My two started their new school yesterday, neither were very happy when they came home. I think they were a bit overwelmed by the experience despite only their year (7) and year 12 being. The school wasn't exactly awash with hundreds of children.
The others start today so I expect more winging this evening.
They did bring home a few letters about two school trips as well as 'voluntary' contributions for 'Design and Technology' classes. Total cost laid out for the pair of them was ?97.00.
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Those "voluntary" contributions are a bugger, aren't they. I sometimes "forget" to make them.
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Growler jnr. has been told to take a digi camera with him tomorrow, so he can download the pictures onto the school computer for his course work.
It better come back fully fit and working, or the bloody headmaster will be receiving another visit from me....bloody cheek. ::)
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Growler jnr. has been told to take a digi camera with him tomorrow, so he can download the pictures onto the school computer for his course work.
It better come back fully fit and working, or the bloody headmaster will be receiving another visit from me....bloody cheek. ::)
You are kidding me! No way would I let a child of mine take a digi camera to school, it's asking for trouble! Why can't he download them at home and just take in a memory stick?
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Having two grown up children (39 and 37 years old respectively), another in year 10, one in year 5 and the littlest in year 2 I have been involved with the education of my children for the past 34 years. In that I have heard so much about what they "Have to do" and what they "Have been told we must bring in" etc. I can assure you that nine tenths of it is that the children have not understood what it is that the teachers have said to them. Countless times I have marched off to the school to complain about the unreasonable or plain stupid demands only to discover that what was actually said in class was quite different to the message that came home. Yes it is often the fault of the teachers who fail to make themselves clear. They forget that what I, as an adult, would grasp instantly is not what a inattentive child, whose mind is on something else (like how much longer must this lesson last before I can go kick a ball around), hears.
Eg. Teenage Hormone Wreck frequently tells me that she MUST work on the internet for her homework. Now they all have PCs in their rooms but the only internet connections are on mine and the wife's machines. When I check this YOU MUST command with the school I discover that the teachers are well aware that less than half their pupils have internet access at home and would never tell the kids that they must use it for homework. What the staff have said is "You can of course get some information from the internet ~ use the PCs in the school library during your lunch breaks". Teenage Hormone Wreck would rather spend her break glued by the mouth to a pile of raging male hormones behind the bike sheds than go to the library so assumes that I will hand over my PC on demand.
I suspect that fewer than half of Growler Junior's class have access to a digital camera and what in fact has happened is that G Jnr has "volunteered" to bring one in. That is the usual way these things turn out when you go steaming in to complain.
I accept that some teachers are thoughtless, silly and often downright ignorant of life as most of us live it BUT they are trained to be very careful about not making ANY child feel deprived because they don't have something. They are aware that some pupils parents are loaded and others are poor (by comparison) and therefore cannot provide all the latest gadgets.
Personally I check and recheck every demand that starts "Teacher says I have GOT TO" because teachers simply don't say that very often and then it is usually about some item of school uniform that the child doesn't want to wear.
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At a former school the Boy had a little book, all the kids did, in whch messages about this sort of thing were sent hime in writing!! It was immensely helpful. We had to sign the book to confirm we had got the message and send it back to school. The times we have been caught out at 7.00 a.m. with half remembered tales about tings that have to be done that day. The two worst were "Everyone has to make a guy and take it in today for the school bonfire" eeek: and "Today is "dress up as a foreigner" day" eeek:
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I suspect you may be right, and I'm Growling up the wrong tree. ::)
Too late now anyway. He's gone, wellies and boots in one hand, and MY digi camera in the other. scared2:
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Camera going to a muddy area?
www.cameras2u.com
Get looking because it ain't coming back. point:
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Camera going to a muddy area?
www.cameras2u.com
Get looking because it ain't coming back. point:
Thanks for that cheery observation Miss Wench. ::)
I'll take that on board, and if you are right, I won't be shocked or disappointed, just f'kin' blazin' eveilgrin:
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What tickles me about this
skive in the countryside for a day field trip, is that he had to write a full report of his findings and experiences back in July for his GCSE course werk. eeek:
For Snoops' benefit, it's the River Alyn he's gone off to observe.
What could possibly go wrong I wonder? ::)
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What tickles me about this skive in the countryside for a day field trip, is that he had to write a full report of his findings and experiences back in July for his GCSE course werk. eeek:
HOw the buggery does that work then?
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What tickles me about this skive in the countryside for a day field trip, is that he had to write a full report of his findings and experiences back in July for his GCSE course werk. eeek:
HOw the buggery does that work then?
They're building a time machine in Science... whistle:
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What tickles me about this skive in the countryside for a day field trip, is that he had to write a full report of his findings and experiences back in July for his GCSE course werk. eeek:
HOw the buggery does that work then?
They don't always have time to fit it all in and so do it ahead of time. Ludicrous isn't it! It's like science experiments, we had a list during the first week of our IB course of all the practicals we would have to complete over the two years. Most of us had them all written up and in our practical notebooks by the first Christmas.
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What tickles me about this skive in the countryside for a day field trip, is that he had to write a full report of his findings and experiences back in July for his GCSE course werk. eeek:
HOw the buggery does that work then?
Yea, you would bloody wonder ey? noooo:
I only found out about that 'little nugget of info' this morning whilst printing some River Alyn stuff off for him on here.
I nearly burst a gut!
He didn't want to go, as he feels everyone will be just 'messin' about'
He's probably right too, sadly.
I should have offered to go as a helper, and drown some of the little scrotes in his class.
Sorry, didn't mean to stand on your head whilst it was under the water. I thought it was a boulder. ::)
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Camera going to a muddy area?
www.cameras2u.com
Get looking because it ain't coming back. point:
My cynisism has made me happy.
The camera came back in full working order. eeek:
Apparently, the little twat that broke his nose last year was placed in his group, and proceeded to poke Growler Jnr with his water depth measuring rod. evil:
WTF are the teachers playing at?
Yet ANOTHER phone call to the school now then.
Sadly, but probably wisely, Growler jnr. will not point out this scum bag to me.
I need to 'speak' to him before he leaves next year. eveilgrin:
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Ever seen "Strangers on a Train" Growler?
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Ever seen "Strangers on a Train" Growler?
Hitch's finest work is of course "Rope"
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No, Rear Window, but Growler needs a ref to Strangers on a Train.
Rope was technically interesting though, by virtue of his shooting technique on that occasion.
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Nick's right, Rear Window everytime.
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The Lady Vanishes is of course also a fine example.. whistle:
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Ever seen "Strangers on a Train" Growler?
No. Should I have done, and wtf are you all ramblin' on about again ey, or is this simply confirmation of my pig thick ignorance somehow?
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The film in question involves 2 men who, in the case of one inadvertently, agree to swop murder victims, so that their respective crimes appear motiveless and untraceable. I forget how this started now!
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The film in question involves 2 men who, in the case of one inadvertently, agree to swop murder victims, so that their respective crimes appear motiveless and untraceable. I forget how this started now!
I've lost the plot all 'round now tbh. confused:
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The film in question involves 2 men who, in the case of one inadvertently, agree to swop murder victims, so that their respective crimes appear motiveless and untraceable. I forget how this started now!
I've lost the plot all 'round now tbh. confused:
I think it was about shit on shoes? shrugs:
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The film in question involves 2 men who, in the case of one inadvertently, agree to swop murder victims, so that their respective crimes appear motiveless and untraceable. I forget how this started now!
I've lost the plot all 'round now tbh. confused:
I think it was about shit on shoes? shrugs:
We do seem to ramble a bit ~ do you think the beer could stand a little more water?
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The film in question involves 2 men who, in the case of one inadvertently, agree to swop murder victims, so that their respective crimes appear motiveless and untraceable. I forget how this started now!
I've lost the plot all 'round now tbh. confused:
I think it was about shit on shoes? shrugs:
We do seem to ramble a bit ~ do you think the beer could stand a little more water?
Or the water a little more beer p'raps? scared:
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The film in question involves 2 men who, in the case of one inadvertently, agree to swop murder victims, so that their respective crimes appear motiveless and untraceable. I forget how this started now!
I've lost the plot all 'round now tbh. confused:
I think it was about shit on shoes? shrugs:
We do seem to ramble a bit ~ do you think the beer could stand a little more water?
Or the water a little more beer p'raps? scared:
whistle:
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Back on topic. We delivered The Boy, all spruce and shiny, at 8.45 this morning. I hereby request everyone here to keep their fingers crossed, and other appendages too in the case of the ladies.
I thank you!
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Fingers crossed and hoping for the best. Or at least no phonecalls before lunchtime! ;)
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What could possibly go wrong?
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Reckon he only has fifteen/twenty minutes to go! eeek: First day without calamity?
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Good day. Maths homework was a bastard though!
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WELL!
I took him into school just now. Nice lady from the LEA eyes: was there. She is helping out while he settles in. They had PE first this mronign so she had changed into her Netball kit to help out. Little short skirt, tight shirt and ankle socks. My trousers nearly blew up.
I was trying to talk to her and kept losing my thread. I also may have dribbled a bit.
Phwoar!
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Where's the bucket of cold water emoticon when you need it?
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WELL!
I took him into school just now. Nice lady from the LEA eyes: was there. She is helping out while he settles in. They had PE first this mronign so she had changed into her Netball kit to help out. Little short skirt, tight shirt and ankle socks. My trousers nearly blew up.
I was trying to talk to her and kept losing my thread. I also may have dribbled a bit.
Phwoar!
Mrs Snoopy wants to know which end was dribbling?
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Mr Wench has a new crop of MILF this year. One of whom was a previous MILF and now is a divorced MILF. eeek:
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A MILF on the pull then. Has she got a new hairdo?
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A MILF on the pull then. Has she got a new hairdo?
Yep, new hair, new car, new clothes and apparently new breasts! eeek:
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How does he know about those?
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How does he know about those?
The female teachers that are my friends have informed me. Mr Wench knows better than to mention them.
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One of the local MILFs got divroced last year. She transformed herself within about 48 hours. I scarcely recognised her. She even joined a gym!
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One of the local MILFs got divroced last year. She transformed herself within about 48 hours. I scarcely recognised her. She even joined a gym!
They all do that after a divorce. If they'd thought of it earlier they would probably still be married. ::)
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One of the local MILFs got divroced last year. She transformed herself within about 48 hours. I scarcely recognised her. She even joined a gym!
They all do that after a divorce. If they'd thought of it earlier they would probably still be married. ::)
Maybe the husband wasn't worth it?
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eeek:
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One of the local MILFs got divroced last year. She transformed herself within about 48 hours. I scarcely recognised her. She even joined a gym!
They all do that after a divorce. If they'd thought of it earlier they would probably still be married. ::)
Maybe the husband wasn't worth it?
I sold the bed after my divorce.
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We have a new battle on. Postie just came. School has submitted 21 Appendices of new information. They can't do that. Hearing is on Tuesday morning, lawyers and everything. Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeesss. Squeeze those balls, what Snoopy said.
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21!?!?!?!?!?! eeek:
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The QC (another nephew lol:) is working on it
[attachment deleted by admin]
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I'm just back from being summoned to see the headmistress.
Today he gave a kid a black eye for pushing him in the back, it turns out the kid was innocent. He also continues to shout out in class instead of putting his hand up, called the teacher a " Big Meanie ", is very aggresive all the time and thinks nothing of picking on kids who are 4 years older than him.
"A meeting MUST be had as soon as possible before he controls the whole school"
Meg will hit the roof when she gets home....think i'll get hammered tonight whistle:
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Ritalin?
For all of you?
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Sounds like a good plan. Ritalin all round.
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Me too!
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Me too!
You especially. <pats excitable Nick on the head>
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Piano lesson shortly spider:
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scared2: