The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: GROWLER on August 10, 2007, 07:21:53 PM
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'The Swamp' is situated in a field that is just a small part of the landowners estate. It is also 'home' to a well established Paint Balling company, that have been operating for 5 years now.
The landowner in his wisdom, has rented out a large field close to The Swamp and Paintballing to some organisation that are having a scarecrow festival in 2 weeks time.
Didn't have a problem with that tbh, in fact I saw it as a possible business opportunity, that is until this week, when all the advertising signs that have been erected over the borough have now been altered to include the new attraction of a ...............TRAVELLING FUN FAIR! eeek:
Everything that isn't bolted down into re-inforced concrete with land mines scattered over the surrounding area is being removed.
It's not just the probable pikeys that run these mobile dens of eniquity, but their bloody scummy breath wasting pond life followers.
Had one in our 'town' a couple of years ago, and one of the pikeys kids was bricked and kicked to death.
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Imminent.
We are guarding our valuables hereabouts too. Whole thing sounds like a nightmare cry: eeek:
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Imminent.
We are guarding our valuables hereabouts too. Whole thing sounds like a nightmare cry: eeek:
I shall be speaking to the 'Lord of the Manor' tomorrow with reference to my fears.
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You are definitely being racist here. That is not good.
What you need to do is get a few really big nasty dogs and a small caravan and camp out and watch them 24/7 so that they get the message and behave. Filming helps.
Remember to keep your cell phone charged.
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You are definitely being racist here. That is not good.
What you need to do is get a few really big nasty dogs and a small caravan and camp out and watch them 24/7 so that they get the message and behave. Filming helps.
Remember to keep your cell phone charged.
Funnily enough, THAT is what I am seriously considering.
Just need a serriously bad one eyed dog now.
I'll ask Mrs GROWLER to see if she can help. ;)
Racist or not. This situation has got me worried as it would most decent people I think.
Unfortunately, the landowner is of Irish decent/desent whatever, so ranting about pikeys may not go down to well. I shall tread carefully.
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Invite Snoopy over and 'forget' to feed him. whistle:
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Had one in our 'town' a couple of years ago, and one of the pikeys kids was bricked and kicked to death.
I've not seen that game before, did they win a fish?
Yep, Pikeys are bad, however the Chavs that follow their over-priced dangerous shite are possibly worse...
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I recall the invasion of travellers we had who came for the cockle harvest. They fought, drank and puked all the time, fortunately only with and on on another.
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Any such event must be licenced by the local authority even if it is on "Private Land". Speak to your councilor and local police commander about your concerns. They must have placed a "public advert" somewhere before they were granted a licence and that was when you should have objected as can any member of the public who may be effected by the event.
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Q. What's the similarity between Pikeys and Cigarettes?
A. Both hang around in packs of 10 or twenty, both smell bad and both are barred from every pub in the land.
There is only one answer - burn them. Burn them all.
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Q. What's the similarity between Pikeys and Cigarettes?
A. Both hang around in packs of 10 or twenty, both smell bad and both are barred from every pub in the land.
There is only one answer - burn them. Burn them all.
Profound! very Profound! tunble:
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I note that the same event promises "Fun for all the Family". In practice this means:
Clowns noooo:
Jugglers noooo: noooo:
and
wait for it
Morris Dancers noooo: noooo: noooo:
Does no one have any imagination anymore?
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Imagination ??? I've never even imagined Pikey Morris Dancers let alone seen them......
Not even when drunk!
No!
The very thought is an abomination. ::)
> shiver <
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This might put your mind at rest (only said might!)
A family owning a travelling fair have lived peacefully in our village for well over 20 years. They are not pikeys, they are very nice people. They take their fair all around the country during the summer and have been doing so for years.
Let's hope your travelling fair is owned by people like them
derek
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The Travelling Fun Fair arrived here yesterday.. loads of fighting and more young teenage scrubbers pushing prams around in 9 months time
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The Travelling Fun Fair arrived here yesterday.. loads of fighting and more young teenage scrubbers pushing prams around in 9 months time
Thanks for those few kind words of comfort Begsy. whistle:
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Well I've been warned to shift everything.
The main man at the paintballing has informed me that he's staying on site for 4 days to protect his belongings and set up, and has very kindly offered to look after my stuff too.
He isn't the sort to argue with. scared2:
I may yet decide to have a 'little 'holiday' down there myself yet.
Need to go and purchase a base ball bat now for possible 'games tournament' ;)
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Can I help?
The alternative is a trip to Glasgow. I may need to be busy.
Please
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Can I help?
The alternative is a trip to Glasgow. I may need to be busy.
Please
You'll be most welcome, but don't blame me if things turn nasty. We're talking probable pikeys here, AND the dreaded chavvy scumbag followers these things attract from both the dreaded inbreeding Neston, Ellesmere Port and surrounding areas. I'm predicting trouble but it'll come as a pleasant suprise if all goes smoothly and quietly.
I'm sure the occupants of the multi millionaire Gayton residents properties that backs onto the field they are using, are going to be well chuffed about all this......NOT! eveilgrin:
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I refer you to
http://www.filecabi.net/video/brooklynterrorism.html
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I refer you to
http://www.filecabi.net/video/brooklynterrorism.html
We need HIM in here happy001...........and 'The Swamp' in 2 weeks time.
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The Travelling Fun Fair arrived here yesterday.. loads of fighting and more young teenage scrubbers pushing prams around in 9 months time
Business as normal in Barrow then Berek drumroll:
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It's started already, with still a full week to go. ::)
Oh so jolly colourful plastic bunting up at the entrance, and some half baked straw creature perched on top of the paintball sign. The painball boss WILL be so pleased...............NOT! evil:
I fully predict that it'll be set on fire before the end of the week. If not, I'll do it myself. eveilgrin:
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We have scarecrows crucified on lamposts hereabouts.............. shrugs:
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Apparently, these are not pikeys so I've 'reliably' been informed.
Now it could be a ploy, but even I noticed that they've got full size plastic bins complete with bin liners outside the caravans.
Most unusual for pikeys to even remotey consider the surrounding environment.
24 hours on, and a weird lack of shite lying around so far. confused:
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They are lulling you into a false sense of security scared2:
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They are lulling you into a false sense of security scared2:
Not a chance.
I don't trust anyone that I don't know. Trust has to be earned with positive words and actions over a period of time, but you have to give a little bit of slack sometimes................... until things go tits up. eveilgrin:
Quiet caution for now. Can't do me much harm presently anyway, as I've shifted everything bar 'The Swamp' itself. ;)
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Some pikeys are going round the village trying to flog a large green metal container. Buyer collects. Mrs Nick wants somewhere to keep her tat mountain........... point:
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LOST
One slightly used three-stage gasometer. In full working order and painted green.
Last seen resting near Chester.
Small reward.
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In my garden. Cheap for ?50
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In my garden. Cheap for ?50
Cheap cheap, cheap cheap... ?50 please... whistle:
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In my garden. Cheap for ?50
noooo: I said 'SMALL reward' ?10!
But I'll give you ?15 to return it to Chester. ;D
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WTF are you lot ramblin' on about............again? ::)
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WTF are you lot ramblin' on about............again? ::)
The stolen gasometer of course! ::)
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WTF are you lot ramblin' on about............again? ::)
The stolen gasometer of course! ::)
WHAT / WHICH bloody gasometer? confused:
You lot do my 'swede' in sometimes. noooo:
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WTF are you lot ramblin' on about............again? ::)
The stolen gasometer of course! ::)
WHAT / WHICH bloody gasometer? confused:
You lot do my 'swede' in sometimes. noooo:
The gasometer that the pikeys nicked! ::)
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WTF are you lot ramblin' on about............again? ::)
The stolen gasometer of course! ::)
WHAT / WHICH bloody gasometer? confused:
You lot do my 'swede' in sometimes. noooo:
The gasometer that the pikeys nicked! ::)
. . . . and which Nick claims is in his back garden! Must have a bloody big garden is all I can say.
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I never mentioned a gasometer, that was another boy.
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I never mentioned a gasometer, that was another boy.
Did so too:
LOST
One slightly used three-stage gasometer. In full working order and painted green.
Last seen resting near Chester.
Small reward.
. . . and the very next post is:
In my garden. Cheap for ?50
I rest my case (just as well 'cos it's getting bloody heavy!)
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The response you received from Nick was an automatic one ~ whenever the sh*t flies he is conditioned to duck. surrender:
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::) ::)
This thread lacks pedantry. noooo:
These are gasometers:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnews.bbc.co.uk%2Folmedia%2F260000%2Fimages%2F_264609_gaschamber_animation.gif&hash=1e5b0a9f4070df7d5d85f45dcd08ffb574a3785f)
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnews.bbc.co.uk%2Folmedia%2F260000%2Fimages%2F_264609_gasometer_150.jpg&hash=9c66f51eb693642ae3b7f68d1fe8bad5d81870e9)
Either you have very substantial pikeys or, more likely, the device to which you refer is a gasmeter (a tempting source of one shilling coins in my youth). whistle:
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Is this some sort of competition to see just how far off topic you can take a thread? confused:
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzO1mCAVyMw (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzO1mCAVyMw)
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(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnews.bbc.co.uk%2Fmedia%2Fimages%2F38275000%2Fjpg%2F_38275441_travellers300.jpg&hash=28860509cbfe9647875f9cc35627d156873ccf2b)
A Pikey Camp ~ just to get back on topic
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(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnews.bbc.co.uk%2Fmedia%2Fimages%2F38275000%2Fjpg%2F_38275441_travellers300.jpg&hash=28860509cbfe9647875f9cc35627d156873ccf2b)
A Pikey Camp ~ just to get back on topic
With the customary non taxed or insured Tranny in the background. evil:
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Yep! But see how happy it's made you. cussing:
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Yep! But see how happy it's made you. cussing:
I'm not happy. I'm bloody fedup.
Supposed to be going to the Tatton Hall classic car show today, as I have done for the past 3 years. Was really looking forward to it too, as was G jnr. One of the very best it is, but no, the rain just continues to sheet down. evil:
I'm not spending a load of dosh to get soaked and muddy.
Pissed off. Nowt to do. May as well go for another kip. ::)
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Trust DS to suffer an attack of pedantry. noooo:
I said 'A three stage gasometer'.
Don't exaggerate!
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Yep! But see how happy it's made you. cussing:
I'm not happy. I'm bloody fedup.
Supposed to be going to the Tatton Hall classic car show today, as I have done for the past 3 years. Was really looking forward to it too, as was G jnr. One of the very best it is, but no, the rain just continues to sheet down. evil:
I'm not spending a load of dosh to get soaked and muddy.
Pissed off. Nowt to do. May as well go for another kip. ::)
Night Night ~ see you in the Spring I 'spect
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.sheppardsoftware.com%2Fcontent%2Fanimals%2Fimages%2Fclipart_sleepingbear.jpg&hash=ecc5dfb802ec1d909b51ba879770ebfd32d11b8e)
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(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnews.bbc.co.uk%2Fmedia%2Fimages%2F38275000%2Fjpg%2F_38275441_travellers300.jpg&hash=28860509cbfe9647875f9cc35627d156873ccf2b)
A Pikey Camp ~ just to get back on topic
With the customary non taxed or insured Tranny in the background. evil:
So which of those two 'women' is a bloke then?
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(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnews.bbc.co.uk%2Fmedia%2Fimages%2F38275000%2Fjpg%2F_38275441_travellers300.jpg&hash=28860509cbfe9647875f9cc35627d156873ccf2b)
A Pikey Camp ~ just to get back on topic
With the customary non taxed or insured Tranny in the background. evil:
So which of those two 'women' is a bloke then?
Err ~ I think "Tranny" is Scouse for Ford Transit Van not, as you seem to think, Trans-sexual. ::)
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(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnews.bbc.co.uk%2Fmedia%2Fimages%2F38275000%2Fjpg%2F_38275441_travellers300.jpg&hash=28860509cbfe9647875f9cc35627d156873ccf2b)
A Pikey Camp ~ just to get back on topic
With the customary non taxed or insured Tranny in the background. evil:
So which of those two 'women' is a bloke then?
Err ~ I think "Tranny" is Scouse for Ford Transit Van not, as you seem to think, Trans-sexual. ::)
Bless my ever-broadening horizons! noooo:
What will they think of next?
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Southerner! ::)
'ang on! I'm one myself redface:
Give me a clue ~ How close to the Berks/Hants border are you? I hailed originally from Odiham
Yes I know you were taking the p*ss but I couldn't resist adding to it.
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I have a simple but cunning plan to get rid of htem. Odds are someone in that horde is going to be a patio builder/driveway layer. Get his number and contact him pretending to be the guy who owns the land and tell him you want to create a permanent stadium site there and can he lay a concrete 'floor' area as soon as possible. Let them get started and then ring the owner telling him that they have started laying foundations down for static caravans. Then just watch the fireworks from a safe distance eyes:
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I have a simple but cunning plan to get rid of htem. Odds are someone in that horde is going to be a patio builder/driveway layer. Get his number and contact him pretending to be the guy who owns the land and tell him you want to create a permanent stadium site there and can he lay a concrete 'floor' area as soon as possible. Let them get started and then ring the owner telling him that they have started laying foundations down for static caravans. Then just watch the fireworks from a safe distance eyes:
rubschin: There must be a flaw in this but .....................
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The only flaw I could see would have been the phone number but that is easily rectified buy picking up a payg sim in a nearby shop while dressing as one of the pikeys and paying in cash. whistle:
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I happen to have the Landowner's number whistle: