The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Nick on November 06, 2012, 06:54:11 PM

Title: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Nick on November 06, 2012, 06:54:11 PM
Something in your past you regret? Unburden yourself here  angel1

Miss D goes first  Popcorn:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on November 06, 2012, 06:56:59 PM
Do I really look that stupid ?
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Nick on November 06, 2012, 06:58:11 PM
 shutup:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 06, 2012, 07:08:56 PM
OI! Virtually the same as MY thread this you you moron. cussing:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Baldy on November 06, 2012, 07:23:00 PM
I used to be a lush (Miss D coined that phrase this morning)......

I can now talk to this circle of sufferers and I would like to say to everyone   sad32: sad32: sad32:





I can sincerely say that I have not touched a drop (so therefore I regard myself as 'dry') for  sad32: sad32:

10  sad32: minutes.  sad32: sad32: sad32:

Where is that fooking cork screw!  cussing:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Barman on November 06, 2012, 07:28:53 PM
Edith Piaf - Non, Je ne regrette rien (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q3Kvu6Kgp88#)

 angel1
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Baldy on November 06, 2012, 07:29:46 PM
 Thumbs: Thumbs: Thumbs:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on November 06, 2012, 07:38:58 PM
I used to be a lush (Miss D coined that phrase this morning)......

I can now talk to this circle of sufferers and I would like to say to everyone   sad32: sad32: sad32:

I can sincerely say that I have not touched a drop (so therefore I regard myself as 'dry') for  sad32: sad32:

10  sad32: minutes.  sad32: sad32: sad32:

Where is that fooking cork screw!  cussing:

Time to wet the Baldy's head then  lol:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Barman on November 06, 2012, 07:39:59 PM
I used to be a lush (Miss D coined that phrase this morning)......

I can now talk to this circle of sufferers and I would like to say to everyone   sad32: sad32: sad32:

I can sincerely say that I have not touched a drop (so therefore I regard myself as 'dry') for  sad32: sad32:

10  sad32: minutes.  sad32: sad32: sad32:

Where is that fooking cork screw!  cussing:

Time to wet the Baldy's head then  lol:

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Baldy on November 06, 2012, 07:40:23 PM
 Thumbs: Thumbs: Thumbs:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Nick on November 06, 2012, 07:42:07 PM
Jock the window cleaner is calling unto me angel1
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Baldy on November 06, 2012, 07:47:37 PM
Jock the window cleaner is calling unto me angel1

 eyes:  Popcorn:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on November 06, 2012, 07:55:01 PM
 cussing:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Baldy on November 06, 2012, 08:01:19 PM
 Shrugs:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on November 06, 2012, 08:02:33 PM
S'alright ...it relates to me and an incident a few years back.

No more need be said
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Baldy on November 06, 2012, 08:03:53 PM
S'alright ...it relates to me and an incident a few years back.

No more need be said

 rubschin:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 06, 2012, 08:39:45 PM
S'alright ...it relates to me and an incident a few years back.

No more need be said

I think you'll actually find that it DOES...actually like. Sinister:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Nick on November 07, 2012, 02:54:45 PM
Something about Miss D accidentally exposing herself to a Scottish window cleaner. I am sure she can fill in the details  whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 07, 2012, 02:58:00 PM
Something about Miss D accidentally exposing herself to a Scottish window cleaner. I am sure she can fill in the details  whistle:

Thanks for that. She WILL be pleased now you've given us the outline like.

+1, and you can 'ava a sniff of a coconut slice as a reward. :thumbsup:

Over to you then Miss D. Your audience now awaits the 'nuts and bolts'. cloud9:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Nick on November 07, 2012, 02:59:05 PM
I believe transparent bedwear was involved  eyes:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 07, 2012, 03:00:44 PM
I believe transparent bedwear was involved  eyes:

 eeek: Popcorn:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 07, 2012, 03:03:15 PM
WTF actually IS 'transperant bedware' btw? confused:

Never 'eard of such stuff. I need filling in....not literally like.

Led a very sheltered and unadventurous life you know. sad24:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Nick on November 07, 2012, 03:05:29 PM
Transparent clothing. In Edinburgh I think  rubschin:  Not wise  noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 07, 2012, 03:12:22 PM
Transparent clothing. In Edinburgh I think  rubschin:  Not wise  noooo:

I vaugely remember girlies back in the '60's wearing plassy transperant macs like...and umberellas, or doesn't those count?
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Nick on November 07, 2012, 03:13:35 PM
I don't think an umbrella was involved  noooo:  She clearly finds it a touch subject  whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 07, 2012, 03:31:22 PM
I don't think an umbrella was involved  noooo:  She clearly finds it a touch subject  whistle:

Seemingly. I need more detail, you know, a bir'of meat on the bones like. :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Nick on November 07, 2012, 03:32:27 PM
Miss D certainly has that  scared:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: tel on November 07, 2012, 04:15:55 PM
Oh dear  redface:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Nick on November 07, 2012, 04:16:48 PM
Take cover gents  scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on November 07, 2012, 04:24:08 PM
I believe transparent bedwear was involved  eyes:

These Jock window cleaners do have odd dress sense. noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 07, 2012, 04:58:39 PM
Take cover gents  scared2:

Not me. evil:
I NEVER EVER hide from wimmins. noooo:
Sign of weakness. Not good, not good at all. nonono:

Take it on the chin like a man, or mouse in your case. ::)

 rubschin: probably why most wimmins don't like me come to think of it. ::)
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Nick on November 07, 2012, 05:05:00 PM
I have met Miss D  cloud9:  And she does NOT take prisoners  scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 07, 2012, 05:18:06 PM
I have met Miss D  cloud9:  And she does NOT take prisoners  scared2:

...and I don't take flak either. Only go down fighting. evil:

Anyway, wtf you worrying about/ She's not kicked off...... has she? Shrugs:
Get a bloody grip of yerself you great pussy. Banghead
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Nick on November 07, 2012, 05:23:15 PM
You have not met her  scared2: scared2: scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on November 07, 2012, 05:26:05 PM
Some of us have been working  noooo:

You lot carry on , seems you are having a lovely time
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 07, 2012, 05:27:51 PM
Some of us have been working  noooo:

You lot carry on , seems you are having a lovely time

Ahhhhh. the luvlee Miss D!  cloud9:

How are we this evening then my lickle kitten? :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on November 07, 2012, 05:29:49 PM
You buttering me up for my roasting  ;)
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: apc2010 on November 07, 2012, 05:34:14 PM
You buttering me up for my roasting  ;)


 noooo:     whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 07, 2012, 05:36:55 PM
You buttering me up for my roasting  ;)

No. Just being my ususal open and friendly self, NOT hiding behind soafa's   whistle:  ::) in fear of you or anyone else, that's all my angel.

Like a piggin' mousery in here sometimes. Banghead
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Barman on November 07, 2012, 05:37:19 PM
You buttering me up for my roasting  ;)


 noooo:     whistle:

Don't go there...  noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: apc2010 on November 07, 2012, 05:39:27 PM
You buttering me up for my roasting  ;)


 noooo:     whistle:

Don't go there...  noooo:


 rubschin:   don't know what you mean ....
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on November 07, 2012, 05:40:30 PM
You buttering me up for my roasting  ;)

No. Just being my ususal open and friendly self, NOT hiding behind soafa's   whistle:  ::) in fear of you or anyone else, that's all my angel.

Like a piggin' mousery in here sometimes. Banghead

They just don't have your comprehensive skills to deal with members of the opposite sex  lol:

You could train them like.
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Nick on November 07, 2012, 05:41:42 PM
 scared2:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 07, 2012, 05:46:15 PM
You buttering me up for my roasting  ;)

No. Just being my ususal open and friendly self, NOT hiding behind soafa's   whistle:  ::) in fear of you or anyone else, that's all my angel.

Like a piggin' mousery in here sometimes. Banghead

They just don't have your comprehensive skills to deal with members of the opposite sex  lol:

You could train them like.

Virtually given up on this lot.

I talk straight like, and to hell with the consequences. evil:

Most appreciate that I find, bunch o' wimps.
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: apc2010 on November 07, 2012, 05:48:00 PM
You buttering me up for my roasting  ;)

No. Just being my ususal open and friendly self, NOT hiding behind soafa's   whistle:  ::) in fear of you or anyone else, that's all my angel.

Like a piggin' mousery in here sometimes. Banghead

They just don't have your comprehensive skills to deal with members of the opposite sex  lol:

You could train them like.

Virtually given up on this lot.

I talk straight like, and to hell with the consequences. evil:

Most appreciate that I find, bunch o' wimps.


I am known for being meek like..... :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 07, 2012, 05:52:35 PM
Translates into....giving it maximum toes at the first whiff of brewing trouble, yes? whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 07, 2012, 05:55:08 PM
It's NOT gone unoticed that BM has magically disappeared btw. whistle:

What the hell is this all about now anyway, 'cus I've piggin' forgotten? Banghead
Obviously of grave importance ey? ::)
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on November 07, 2012, 05:58:25 PM


I am known for being meek like..... :thumbsup:

I'd get your hearing tested, they said a squeak. I said a SQUEAK  whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 07, 2012, 06:05:07 PM
Back on topic like....me an me mates shinned it over an ale 'ouse wall when I was 17, to nick a crate of empty bottles of Babycham  ....first ones that came to hand like  redface: ) and took 'em to the offy to claim the 6d deposits back on them all, so I could buy a gallon of petrol to trawl the streets looking for gerlies. whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Nick on November 07, 2012, 06:08:13 PM
tYPICAL SCOUSER THIEVES  noooo: noooo:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Just One More on November 07, 2012, 06:15:18 PM
Transparent clothing. In Edinburgh I think  rubschin:  Not wise  noooo:

I vaugely remember girlies back in the '60's wearing plassy transperant macs like...and umberellas, or doesn't those count?

Vaguely  eeek:

It's an image that you wouldn't be able to get rid of  sick2:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs17.postimage.org%2Fpap00pdwb%2Fseethrumac.jpg&hash=e26d5efb2b353b32aa5d963f386a06a24f320f68) (http://postimage.org/image/pap00pdwb/)
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: GROWLER on November 07, 2012, 06:28:07 PM
tYPICAL SCOUSER THIEVES  noooo: noooo:

But we were all desperate for a shag ffs man!  Banghead
 Surely you can understand that from when you were 17? Shrugs:

I distinctly remember the wumman in the offy asking us ..."good party then lads?", in highly suspicious tones. whistle:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) on November 09, 2012, 10:42:36 AM
I am confessing this only because it is irritating the hell out of me at the moment and to my chagrin I am going to have to shell out wads of money having only just bought my puter back from the 'puter horspickle' the other day.

Last Saturday we took my laptop into our local 'puter horepickle' for a service.  Following an angst ridden weekend during which I not only suffered extreme                                   separation anxiety but had to try and get used to a new, smaller keypad on which some keys were not in the usual place, the whole contraption being made by a company called Apple. noooo:

On Monday we went to get my laptop, my heart skipped for joy as I entered old 'Bent Pete's' emporium, he being called Bent Pete as he is half of the only openly gay couple in Stocksbridgde, well, gay people in a steel community it just wouldn't do would it ?  Imagine if you will, my dismay upon being told by 'Bent Pete' that my device would not be ready until later that day. Imagine my horror when Mr C glibly said 'no problem' we'll collect it tomorrow!

Tuesday dawned bright and sunny and we collected my laptop upon returning home I opened it with awe and delight, rather like that vomit inducing little girl in the  Werthers ad'.  sick2:

It worked, it was a miracle, it was 'as new'.  The day progressed and a little later having taken a very strong dose of painkillers of the Morphine type I went for a lay down on the bed with a mug of coffee and my trusty computer. I typed propped up with snugly warm duck-down pillows, I dozed off coffee mug in hand.  Most of it's contents missed my laptop but some did not. Most letters on it's keyboard work but some do not. I am now back to the Apple keyboard. When I get home the old hair dryer trick will be deployed and if that should fail well, it's back to the only 'gay in the village' for another overhaul.  evil:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Barman on November 09, 2012, 10:45:37 AM
I am confessing this only because it is irritating the hell out of me at the moment and to my chagrin I am going to have to shell out wads of money having only just bought my puter back from the 'puter horspickle' the other day.

Last Saturday we took my laptop into our local 'puter horepickle' for a service.  Following an angst ridden weekend during which I not only suffered extreme                                   separation anxiety but had to try and get used to a new, smaller keypad on which some keys were not in the usual place, the whole contraption being made by a company called Apple. noooo:

On Monday we went to get my laptop, my heart skipped for joy as I entered old 'Bent Pete's' emporium, he being called Bent Pete as he is half of the only openly gay couple in Stocksbridgde, well, gay people in a steel community it just wouldn't do would it ?  Imagine if you will, my dismay upon being told by 'Bent Pete' that my device would not be ready until later that day. Imagine my horror when Mr C glibly said 'no problem' we'll collect it tomorrow!

Tuesday dawned bright and sunny and we collected my laptop upon returning home I opened it with awe and delight, rather like that vomit inducing little girl in the  Werthers ad'.  sick2:

It worked, it was a miracle, it was 'as new'.  The day progressed and a little later having taken a very strong dose of painkillers of the Morphine type I went for a lay down on the bed with a mug of coffee and my trusty computer. I typed propped up with snugly warm duck-down pillows, I dozed off coffee mug in hand.  Most of it's contents missed my laptop but some did not. Most letters on it's keyboard work but some do not. I am now back to the Apple keyboard. When I get home the old hair dryer trick will be deployed and if that should fail well, it's back to the only 'gay in the village' for another overhaul.  evil:

 noooo: happy100

You should be drinking something that evaporates faster....  ;)
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons) on November 09, 2012, 11:30:00 AM
I am confessing this only because it is irritating the hell out of me at the moment and to my chagrin I am going to have to shell out wads of money having only just bought my puter back from the 'puter horspickle' the other day.

Last Saturday we took my laptop into our local 'puter horepickle' for a service.  Following an angst ridden weekend during which I not only suffered extreme                                   separation anxiety but had to try and get used to a new, smaller keypad on which some keys were not in the usual place, the whole contraption being made by a company called Apple. noooo:

On Monday we went to get my laptop, my heart skipped for joy as I entered old 'Bent Pete's' emporium, he being called Bent Pete as he is half of the only openly gay couple in Stocksbridgde, well, gay people in a steel community it just wouldn't do would it ?  Imagine if you will, my dismay upon being told by 'Bent Pete' that my device would not be ready until later that day. Imagine my horror when Mr C glibly said 'no problem' we'll collect it tomorrow!

Tuesday dawned bright and sunny and we collected my laptop upon returning home I opened it with awe and delight, rather like that vomit inducing little girl in the  Werthers ad'.  sick2:

It worked, it was a miracle, it was 'as new'.  The day progressed and a little later having taken a very strong dose of painkillers of the Morphine type I went for a lay down on the bed with a mug of coffee and my trusty computer. I typed propped up with snugly warm duck-down pillows, I dozed off coffee mug in hand.  Most of it's contents missed my laptop but some did not. Most letters on it's keyboard work but some do not. I am now back to the Apple keyboard. When I get home the old hair dryer trick will be deployed and if that should fail well, it's back to the only 'gay in the village' for another overhaul.  evil:

 noooo: happy100

You should be drinking something that evaporates faster....  ;)

I see a voddy fest as being the best and by far the cheapest prescription then Talisker by the vat being out of my range and meths by the vat being apt to land me back in here. :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The all new Confessions thread
Post by: Baldy on November 09, 2012, 11:43:10 AM
Take the battery out and try putting it in a container of dried rice first. I know it with need to be a bloody big container but that will soak up all the moisture. Then if it still does not work put the puter and the battery in separate poly bags and put in the freezer over night...not sure why and what this does but it werked for my smartphone that I dropped in the swimming pool (the other phone, just an old banger came back to life after leaving it in the rice. The more complicated one needed the freezer).

I read about it on the net and it seems that I am not the only fool who gets liquid inside machinery that should be kept dry.  redface:

Worth giving it a go before you line the pockets of Bent Pete.  Thumbs: