The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Steve on March 21, 2013, 06:24:03 PM

Title: The Once Upon a Time Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Steve on March 21, 2013, 06:24:03 PM
Thread title changed in accordance with the Treaty of Bickering

Following my appalling cock up slight mistook in putting Miss D as Minister for Food, the betrayal by the double agent Boogs and the extreme measures of the revisionist Barman in declaring the VP a "Marmite Free Zone" it is clear that a new step is need

Behold Marmite-Twigletia the world's newest nation

Territory will be flexible, defined as anywhere where Marmite/Twiglet lovers be and Marmite haters with axes ain't looking.

The President and other clever dick roles will be filled by whichever Marmite/Twiglet lover can be arsed at the time is around

We demand that Bickering is kept strictly neutral

An immediate priority will be dealing with the threats of WMD * so the Cunning almost secret 3 pronged  Defence Plan ** will be put into immediate effect

Citizens of Marmite-Twigletia our time has come

 ;)


Right, what needs to be fixed next?



* Weapons of Miss Demeanour

** This will consist of (1) running away, (2) positioning foolish brave scapegoats in the way and (3) threatening advanced lampoonery

Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: apc2010 on March 21, 2013, 06:26:08 PM
I can be in charge , Snoopy can be treasurer.......... :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Nick on March 21, 2013, 06:27:50 PM
DS has a tanker (needs to be flushed out a bit)
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Marley's Ghost (Imbiber of Spirits) on March 21, 2013, 06:29:46 PM
I can make spooky noises and frighten people!
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Steve on March 21, 2013, 06:30:48 PM
I can malespooky noises and frighten people!
:thumbsup:  This is going rather well


No reply from the enemy. have we stolen a march on them



or are they just sloshed?
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: apc2010 on March 21, 2013, 06:37:57 PM
Can we twin with sushi land just for back up....... rubschin:
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Nick on March 21, 2013, 06:39:30 PM
I can malespooky noises and frighten people!
:thumbsup:  This is going rather well


No reply from the enemy. have we stolen a march on them



or are they just sloshed?
Prolly canoodling with the man  noooo:   I can think of nothing werse  sick2:
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Barman on March 21, 2013, 06:56:18 PM
You're ripping the VP asunder like....  noooo:

Whatever that means....  redface:
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: boogs on March 21, 2013, 06:57:46 PM
The enemy are just standing in the wings waiting..  patience is a virtue.... whistle:
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: apc2010 on March 21, 2013, 06:58:22 PM
You're ripping the VP asunder like....  noooo:

Whatever that means....  redface:

Is that a chamber pot........ rubschin:
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Barman on March 21, 2013, 06:59:36 PM
You're ripping the VP asunder like....  noooo:

Whatever that means....  redface:

Is that a chamber pot........ rubschin:

No... that is a gusunder... ::)
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: boogs on March 21, 2013, 07:20:56 PM
I can malespooky noises and frighten people!
:thumbsup:  This is going rather well


No reply from the enemy. have we stolen a march on them



or are they just sloshed?
Prolly canoodling with the man  noooo:   I can think of nothing werse  sick2:

What both of us .... rubschin:
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Miss Demeanour on March 21, 2013, 07:52:56 PM
What treachery is afoot. 

You low life traitors will be dealt with in the manner that suits your crime. You will be rounded up, stripped and coated in the stuff that has sealed your fate. 

I shall round up the scraggiest, most flea ridden pesky cat's with the coursest tongues to take off the outer layers of your skin. I shall then pour salt all over your slug like bodies until you repent !
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: apc2010 on March 21, 2013, 07:54:11 PM
What treachery is afoot. 

You low life traitors will be dealt with in the manner that suits your crime. You will be rounded up, stripped and coated in the stuff that has sealed your fate. 

I shall round up the scraggiest, most flea ridden pesky cat's with the coursest tongues to take off the outer layers of your skin. I shall then pour salt all over your slug like bodies until you repent !

Your normal Friday night then........ noooo:
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: boogs on March 21, 2013, 07:57:12 PM
What treachery is afoot. 

You low life traitors will be dealt with in the manner that suits your crime. You will be rounded up, stripped and coated in the stuff that has sealed your fate. 

I shall round up the scraggiest, most flea ridden pesky cat's with the coursest tongues to take off the outer layers of your skin. I shall then pour salt all over your slug like bodies until you repent !

No that''s what I call a plan...

 :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Barman on March 21, 2013, 07:59:12 PM
What treachery is afoot. 

You low life traitors will be dealt with in the manner that suits your crime. You will be rounded up, stripped and coated in the stuff that has sealed your fate. 

I shall round up the scraggiest, most flea ridden pesky cat's with the coursest tongues to take off the outer layers of your skin. I shall then pour salt all over your slug like bodies until you repent !

Your normal Friday night then........ noooo:

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Darwins Selection on March 21, 2013, 09:48:33 PM
I have called the UN.

Coffee Nanna is popping in for a pint and to sort things out.
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Steve on March 22, 2013, 12:17:30 AM
What treachery is afoot. 

You low life traitors will be dealt with in the manner that suits your crime. You will be rounded up, stripped and coated in the stuff that has sealed your fate. 

I shall round up the scraggiest, most flea ridden pesky cat's with the coursest tongues to take off the outer layers of your skin. I shall then pour salt all over your slug like bodies until you repent !
So the Ministeress for Food wants peace talks I see ^

Peace talks is good, we can bring voddy




Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Miss Demeanour on March 22, 2013, 06:16:27 AM
We can have pissed talks if you want as long as you concede I'm right your wrong !
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Barman on March 22, 2013, 06:26:33 AM
We xan have pissed talks if you want as long as you concede I'm right your wrong !

 lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Steve on March 22, 2013, 09:56:37 AM
Your concessions are noted
Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Steve on March 22, 2013, 02:35:00 PM
Coffee Nanna from the UN (thanks DS) has just sent through the official diplomatic translation of the recent posts from the Ministeress of Food

Quote from: The Ministry of Food
Draft Treaty Proposal

Her right royalness, supreme being and Ministeress of Food proposes that providing that . .

1.  All reference to Marmite-Twigletia as a new independent republic cease and are removed

2.  No displays of the Marmite-Twigletia flag are made nor singing of the Marmite-Twigletia anthem is heard

3.  The stipend of the Ministeress of Food is increased by an extra bottle of non watered down decent virtual vodka a week

4. You bastards hand over that bottle of Zytnia right now

5.  All weapons of advanced lampoonery are retargeted towards far more evil targets

6.  You bastards agree that in the all new junta, alleged double agent Boogs gets the role of Ministeress for spying and getting men to fix things by fluttering eyelashes

then

7.  She will use her good offices to persuade Barman to remove overt Marmitist displays

8.  Marmite and Twiglets can be eaten and traded anywhere she doesn't get to see, hear or smell the damn stuff

9.  She and her team will make earnest attempts to kiss better all severed limbs, heads and other bodily parts that resulted from use of her axe in the unfortunate fracas in the Turnip and Onion pub yesterday

Sounds like we have a deal!   :thumbsup:

Behold the Treaty of Bickering 2013


Smart cookie that Coffee Nanna eh, shall we send him to help old Aniseedballs?


Title: Re: The All New Independent Republic of Marmite-Twigletia
Post by: Barman on March 22, 2013, 02:57:11 PM
What could possibly go wrong like...?  rubschin: