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Come Inside... => The Computer Room => Topic started by: Pastis on September 07, 2007, 03:01:44 PM

Title: RTFM
Post by: Pastis on September 07, 2007, 03:01:44 PM
Yes, I've been reading the effing manual but for the life of me I can't get the DVD/VCR machine to tune into the lovely new TV...

 Banghead Banghead

I'm sure it's simple and I'm not going to  surrender: yet, but strewth ...  censored:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: The Moan Ranger on September 07, 2007, 03:05:02 PM
Have you plugged it in?  eyes:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: TG on September 07, 2007, 03:06:43 PM
I just bought a new TV with a DVD and sound system, what with a seperate DVD recorder it now takes FIVE remote controls to work the effing thing.

And the cables at the back you would not beleive.

I love it.  cloud9:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Pastis on September 07, 2007, 03:12:34 PM
Have you plugged it in?  eyes:

 censored:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: tel on September 07, 2007, 03:13:51 PM
That's on tonight, as well.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Barman on September 07, 2007, 03:18:47 PM
Yes, I've been reading the effing manual but for the life of me I can't get the DVD/VCR machine to tune into the lovely new TV...
There's your problem...  whistle:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Pastis on September 07, 2007, 03:27:38 PM
Barman, you don't know how right you are  lol:

Have an applaud !

Just cracked it ... scart leads ... no need to tune ... AV1 channel automatic...  doh:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 07, 2007, 03:33:24 PM
If at first you cannot Scart ~ find a five year old and promise him unlimited cartoon viewings for a week.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Pastis on September 07, 2007, 03:35:34 PM
The thought of texting my 11 yr. old nephew had occurred to me  confused:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Barman on September 07, 2007, 03:36:42 PM
Barman, you don't know how right you are  lol:

Have an applaud !

Just cracked it ... scart leads ... no need to tune ... AV1 channel automatic...  doh:
Indeed, whack it all together and switch it on ? hey presto!

On no account whatsoever should you read the manual which was probably written in Chinese and translated through several other languages before finally being translated to English.  ;)
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 07, 2007, 03:47:22 PM
Barman, you don't know how right you are  lol:

Have an applaud !

Just cracked it ... scart leads ... no need to tune ... AV1 channel automatic...  doh:
Indeed, whack it all together and switch it on ? hey presto!

On no account whatsoever should you read the manual which was probably written in Chinese and translated through several other languages before finally being translated to English.  ;)

Barman means "Manual reading you should before not attempting to connect item to set ensure mains off they are"
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Pastis on September 07, 2007, 03:49:02 PM
I know, it's bloody unbelievable  ::)

This morning I was working out the circumference of an ellipse involving Pi and the square root of major and minor axes to determine the design area on a complex component which will be moulded by the thousand...

And this afternoon I'm having difficulty watching the telly  confused:

Anyway, job done now... what's on Film4 I wonder  rubschin:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Barman on September 07, 2007, 03:50:38 PM
Barman, you don't know how right you are  lol:

Have an applaud !

Just cracked it ... scart leads ... no need to tune ... AV1 channel automatic...  doh:
Indeed, whack it all together and switch it on ? hey presto!

On no account whatsoever should you read the manual which was probably written in Chinese and translated through several other languages before finally being translated to English.  ;)

Barman means "Manual reading you should before not attempting to connect item to set ensure mains off they are"
No I don't! (https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Femo%2Fangry016.gif&hash=af20a92f7066e8a9c12cb3839f79427cb93c2d10) (http://www.freesmileys.org)
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 07, 2007, 03:51:40 PM
Barman, you don't know how right you are  lol:

Have an applaud !

Just cracked it ... scart leads ... no need to tune ... AV1 channel automatic...  doh:
Indeed, whack it all together and switch it on ? hey presto!

On no account whatsoever should you read the manual which was probably written in Chinese and translated through several other languages before finally being translated to English.  ;)

Barman means "Manual reading you should before not attempting to connect item to set ensure mains off they are"
No I don't! (https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Femo%2Fangry016.gif&hash=af20a92f7066e8a9c12cb3839f79427cb93c2d10) (http://www.freesmileys.org)


Oooooooooooooo! Get 'er wiv 'er knickers in a twist!
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Barman on September 07, 2007, 03:52:13 PM
This morning I was working out the circumference of an ellipse involving Pi and the square root of major and minor axes to determine the design area on a complex component which will be moulded by the thousand...
I bet it was about... um that much.  point:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Barman on September 07, 2007, 03:53:00 PM
Barman, you don't know how right you are  lol:

Have an applaud !

Just cracked it ... scart leads ... no need to tune ... AV1 channel automatic...  doh:
Indeed, whack it all together and switch it on ? hey presto!

On no account whatsoever should you read the manual which was probably written in Chinese and translated through several other languages before finally being translated to English.  ;)

Barman means "Manual reading you should before not attempting to connect item to set ensure mains off they are"
No I don't! (https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Femo%2Fangry016.gif&hash=af20a92f7066e8a9c12cb3839f79427cb93c2d10) (http://www.freesmileys.org)


Oooooooooooooo! Get 'er wiv 'er knickers in a twist!
No I haven't! (https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Femo%2Fangry016.gif&hash=af20a92f7066e8a9c12cb3839f79427cb93c2d10) (http://www.freesmileys.org)
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 07, 2007, 03:54:13 PM
I think somebody is acting like a naughty boy having a tantrum ~ that's what I think
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Pastis on September 07, 2007, 04:02:31 PM
This morning I was working out the circumference of an ellipse involving Pi and the square root of major and minor axes to determine the design area on a complex component which will be moulded by the thousand...
I bet it was about... um that much.  point:

 rubschin: You might just get that applaud taken back.....
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: TG on September 07, 2007, 06:56:33 PM

This morning I was working out the circumference of an ellipse involving Pi and the square root of major and minor axes to determine the design area on a complex component which will be moulded by the thousand...


I find computers are good for this sort of thing.  happy088

Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 07, 2007, 06:59:57 PM

This morning I was working out the circumference of an ellipse involving Pi and the square root of major and minor axes to determine the design area on a complex component which will be moulded by the thousand...


I find computers are good for this sort of thing.  happy088



Personally ~ I'd employ a man.  tunble:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: TG on September 07, 2007, 07:02:12 PM
I can only afford a second hand PC I'm afraid.  cry:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 07, 2007, 07:07:10 PM
If I accepted a contract that required those sorts of calculations it would have to be worth hiring help.

Now I'm orf to watch t'match.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Nick on September 08, 2007, 10:15:32 AM
I just bought a new TV with a DVD and sound system, what with a seperate DVD recorder it now takes FIVE remote controls to work the effing thing.
And the cables at the back you would not beleive.

I love it.  cloud9:


 lol: lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Barman on September 08, 2007, 10:22:13 AM
I just bought a new TV with a DVD and sound system, what with a seperate DVD recorder it now takes FIVE remote controls to work the effing thing.
I use a Philips pronto to replace five remotes in my cinema...  cloud9:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Nick on September 08, 2007, 10:24:03 AM
Cinema?
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Barman on September 08, 2007, 11:22:47 AM
Cinema?
Don't you have one?  whistle:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 11:47:27 AM
Cinema?
Don't you have one?  whistle:

Cinema at home = Room with an over large screen and too many speakers for comfort.  ::)

Cinema in town = Expensive popcorn, seats full of scumbags all making a noise, a screen that is too large to see properly and a sound system that makes my ears hurt. I'll stick to my wireless thanks all the same.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Barman on September 08, 2007, 11:58:05 AM
Cinema?
Don't you have one?  whistle:

Cinema at home = Room with an over large screen and too many speakers for comfort.  ::)

Cinema in town = Expensive popcorn, seats full of scumbags all making a noise, a screen that is too large to see properly and a sound system that makes my ears hurt. I'll stick to my wireless thanks all the same.
rubschin:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 12:06:01 PM
Cinema?
Don't you have one?  whistle:

Cinema at home = Room with an over large screen and too many speakers for comfort.  ::)

Cinema in town = Expensive popcorn, seats full of scumbags all making a noise, a screen that is too large to see properly and a sound system that makes my ears hurt. I'll stick to my wireless thanks all the same.
rubschin:

Does Landlady come round in the interval with ice creams and stuff ?
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Barman on September 08, 2007, 12:09:52 PM
Ice cream, popcorn, beer, wine, etc.  cloud9:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 12:12:06 PM
Ice cream, popcorn, beer, wine, etc.  cloud9:


 rubschin: Short Skirt, fishnets etc?
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Barman on September 08, 2007, 12:13:24 PM
Ice cream, popcorn, beer, wine, etc.  cloud9:


 rubschin: Short Skirt, fishnets etc?
Obviously...  ::)
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 01:36:25 PM
Ice cream, popcorn, beer, wine, etc.  cloud9:


 rubschin: Short Skirt, fishnets etc?
Obviously...  ::)

Well that explains the  cloud9:




But why bother to watch a film ~ given the circs? eyes:







Oh I geddit now ~ "Home Movies" ............... Dirty Barman... Tsk  noooo:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Barman on September 08, 2007, 01:39:37 PM
Ice cream, popcorn, beer, wine, etc.  cloud9:


 rubschin: Short Skirt, fishnets etc?
Obviously...  ::)

Well that explains the  cloud9:




But why bother to watch a film ~ given the circs? eyes:







Oh I geddit now ~ "Home Movies" ............... Dirty Barman... Tsk  noooo:
redface:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: TG on September 08, 2007, 04:55:11 PM
I just bought a new TV with a DVD and sound system, what with a seperate DVD recorder it now takes FIVE remote controls to work the effing thing.
I use a Philips pronto to replace five remotes in my cinema...  cloud9:

Oooh! I have GOT to get me on of those!  cloud9:

Being an absent minded bastard I seem to have spent more time over the last few days looking for multiple remotes than I have watching the telly.



Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Nick on September 08, 2007, 05:19:17 PM
Actually, you need one of these:

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/39226 (http://www.theonion.com/content/node/39226)
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Barman on September 08, 2007, 07:44:10 PM
Actually, you need one of these:

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/39226 (http://www.theonion.com/content/node/39226)
;D
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 07:53:25 PM
On those occasions when I watch TV I use a walking stick to change the channels.
I poke the wife with it and she gets up and switches it over.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Nick on September 08, 2007, 08:25:48 PM
Sounds good. Four pokes for Channel 4?
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 08, 2007, 08:27:44 PM
That's the general idea ~ she's not keen on Sky News though (Channel 501)  lol:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 08, 2007, 09:29:30 PM
I use a Philips pronto to replace five remotes in my cinema.
So does the Queen.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Barman on September 09, 2007, 05:27:13 AM
That's the general idea ~ she's not keen on Sky News though (Channel 501)  lol:
drumroll:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: TG on September 09, 2007, 11:26:02 AM
On those occasions when I watch TV I use a walking stick to change the channels.
I poke the wife with it and she gets up and switches it over.

Mrs TG is a scouser. if I tried that I would end up with the walking stick broken over my head and then she would steal the TV.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Bar Wench on September 10, 2007, 08:08:39 AM
If Mr Wench tried it he'd get a knitting needle shoved where the sun don't shine.  cussing:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 10, 2007, 08:16:16 AM
If Mr Wench tried it he'd get a knitting needle shoved where the sun don't shine.  cussing:

What size?
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Bar Wench on September 10, 2007, 08:19:26 AM
If Mr Wench tried it he'd get a knitting needle shoved where the sun don't shine.  cussing:

What size?

The small sharp one for facial orifices the large plastic one for orifices further south.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 10, 2007, 08:21:51 AM
If Mr Wench tried it he'd get a knitting needle shoved where the sun don't shine.  cussing:

What size?

The small sharp one for facial orifices the large plastic one for orifices further south.

 eeek: Blimey ~ is he aware of this threat?
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Bar Wench on September 10, 2007, 08:32:59 AM
If Mr Wench tried it he'd get a knitting needle shoved where the sun don't shine.  cussing:

What size?

The small sharp one for facial orifices the large plastic one for orifices further south.

 eeek: Blimey ~ is he aware of this threat?

Of course!  cussing:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Grumpmeister on September 10, 2007, 11:52:18 AM
If Mr Wench tried it he'd get a knitting needle shoved where the sun don't shine.  cussing:

What size?

The small sharp one for facial orifices the large plastic one for orifices further south.

 eeek: Blimey ~ is he aware of this threat?

Of course!  cussing:

Would that be Wenchcon 4 by any chance?  eeek:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Bar Wench on September 10, 2007, 11:53:18 AM
If Mr Wench tried it he'd get a knitting needle shoved where the sun don't shine.  cussing:

What size?

The small sharp one for facial orifices the large plastic one for orifices further south.

 eeek: Blimey ~ is he aware of this threat?

Of course!  cussing:

Would that be Wenchcon 4 by any chance?  eeek:

Nooo, it's just a warning shot! Wenchcon 4 hasn't ever been needed.  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Grumpmeister on September 11, 2007, 11:22:10 AM
Do the rest of us get a 4 minute warning if it ever is needed?  scared2:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Bar Wench on September 11, 2007, 11:27:06 AM
Do the rest of us get a 4 minute warning if it ever is needed?  scared2:

Nope, it is instant!  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: tel on September 11, 2007, 12:28:54 PM
Why does Mr Wench put up with? Masochist? surrender:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Nick on September 11, 2007, 12:32:05 PM
She has a cleavage. I hear. She makes him dribble rubschin:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: tel on September 11, 2007, 12:36:32 PM
She has a cleavage. I hear. She makes him dribble rubschin:
Is that before or after the pain whistle: The dribbling that is, not the cleavage.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Nick on September 11, 2007, 12:56:34 PM
ASk her!
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: tel on September 11, 2007, 01:04:03 PM
The clues have been appearing

http://www.move-to-cyprus.com/virtual-pub/SMF/index.php?topic=1370.msg23058#msg23058

followed by the mention of pain-inflicting instruments.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Misunderstood on September 12, 2007, 11:18:25 AM
The clues have been appearing

http://www.move-to-cyprus.com/virtual-pub/SMF/index.php?topic=1370.msg23058#msg23058

followed by the mention of pain-inflicting instruments.

Typical wummun!  Cleavage in one hand and knitting needle in the other. You never know which hand they are going to greet you with...  confused:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Nick on September 12, 2007, 12:20:37 PM
 eeek:

I have now got myself at the top of each bit of the forum. I await smiting!
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: tel on September 12, 2007, 12:49:57 PM
eeek:

I have now got myself at the top of each bit of the forum. I await smiting!

You will get taken to the specialist chamber in the cellar, for treatment noooo:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 12, 2007, 12:53:54 PM
eeek:

I have now got myself at the top of each bit of the forum. I await smiting!


But you're still only third in the top ten posters and fourth in the top ten topic starters.
Long way to go yet boyo.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Grumpmeister on September 12, 2007, 01:39:51 PM
Cleavage in one hand and knitting needle in the other.

You been watching the Hustler guide to crochet or something?  eeek:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: tel on September 12, 2007, 02:09:11 PM
Can you get cleavage in one hand?
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Bar Wench on September 13, 2007, 11:05:36 AM
Can you get cleavage in one hand?

Not mine you can't.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: tel on September 13, 2007, 11:21:47 AM
Can you get cleavage in one hand?

Not mine you can't.

 redface:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 13, 2007, 12:04:54 PM
Can you get cleavage in one hand?
Not mine you can't.
You haven't seen my hands.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Barman on September 13, 2007, 12:11:15 PM
Can you get cleavage in one hand?
Not mine you can't.
You haven't seen my hands.
A definitive test is called for?  whistle:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Bar Wench on September 13, 2007, 12:16:10 PM
 redface:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 13, 2007, 12:42:28 PM
Isn't cleavage the bit between the .. errrr......... Interesting bits?


Now I could believe that one could not get the . err .... Interesting bits in one hand ~ though like DS I'm willing to try but how does one grasp in one or even two hands an empty space?
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Bar Wench on September 13, 2007, 12:51:37 PM
Good point.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: tel on September 13, 2007, 03:00:06 PM
2 good points, surely. whistle:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 13, 2007, 03:04:02 PM
2 good points, surely. whistle:


Two Excellent points I suggest.
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: tel on September 13, 2007, 03:14:56 PM
2 good points, surely. whistle:


Two Excellent points I suggest.

Now, now, no need to get carried away. We have not seen the proof in the pudding(s).
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 13, 2007, 03:17:30 PM
2 good points, surely. whistle:


Two Excellent points I suggest.

Now, now, no need to get carried away. We have not seen the proof in the pudding(s).

Oh you'd be surprised at what goes on behind the door marked "Management - Private"

We artists know all about painting "Puppies Noses"

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.dariusunrise.com%2Fsnoopy%2520painting%2520our%2520guys.GIF&hash=8c42fd1c3cb169ac1d59b704bd6da915d88fa531)
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Bar Wench on September 13, 2007, 03:44:58 PM
There are cameras in the management toilets aren't there!?!?!  eeek:
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: tel on September 13, 2007, 03:53:18 PM
There are cameras in the management toilets aren't there!?!?!  eeek:

Have you been caught out?
Title: Re: RTFM
Post by: Snoopy on September 13, 2007, 04:56:12 PM
<Snigger>