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Come Inside... => The Medical Centre => Topic started by: Barman on October 17, 2018, 03:42:07 PM

Title: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Barman on October 17, 2018, 03:42:07 PM
So, if you have had the raging trots for weeks and nothing the quackter has prescribed has touched it try this simple and immediate cure (does not involve corks).

Cut some pieces of skin from a Pomegranate (two pieces the size of a two bob bit) and chop them into tiny pieces.

Pour on boiling water and infuse for 10 mins.

Drink the resulting liquid and be able to venture more than 5m from the bog for the first time in weeks! :thumbsup:


(https://i.postimg.cc/56p7kGf0/IMG-20181016-094417.jpg) (https://postimg.cc/56p7kGf0)
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Nick on October 17, 2018, 03:44:59 PM
LL's cooking  noooo: noooo: noooo:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Barman on October 17, 2018, 03:59:10 PM
LL's cooking  noooo: noooo: noooo:

 scared:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Darwins Selection on October 17, 2018, 04:20:15 PM
So, if you have had the raging trots for weeks and nothing the quackter has prescribed has touched it try this simple and immediate cure (does not involve corks).

Cut some pieces of skin from a Pomegranate (two pieces the size of a two bob bit) and chop them into tiny pieces.

Pour on boiling water and infuse for 10 mins.

Drink the resulting liquid and be able to venture more than 5m from the bog for the first time in weeks! :thumbsup:


Changes the problem into continuous projectile vomiting so nothing ever reaches the intestine?
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Barman on October 17, 2018, 04:34:41 PM
So, if you have had the raging trots for weeks and nothing the quackter has prescribed has touched it try this simple and immediate cure (does not involve corks).

Cut some pieces of skin from a Pomegranate (two pieces the size of a two bob bit) and chop them into tiny pieces.

Pour on boiling water and infuse for 10 mins.

Drink the resulting liquid and be able to venture more than 5m from the bog for the first time in weeks! :thumbsup:


Changes the problem into continuous projectile vomiting so nothing ever reaches the intestine?

No, it really does werk...  lol:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Nick on October 17, 2018, 04:50:53 PM
 happy001 happy001 happy001
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Steve on October 17, 2018, 05:12:41 PM
Does this thread give us a clue to who done the dirty on the showers at Nick's lock?


As for Pomegranates, google says it's a well known cure but surely Pepto Bismol is easier esp as Darwin points out, Pomegranates give some people the voms  sick2:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Barman on October 17, 2018, 07:10:32 PM
Does this thread give us a clue to who done the dirty on the showers at Nick's lock?


As for Pomegranates, google says it's a well known cure but surely Pepto Bismol is easier esp as Darwin points out, Pomegranates give some people the voms  sick2:

I give my medical advice freely... you can choose to take it or not... whistle:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on October 17, 2018, 08:15:31 PM
Does this thread give us a clue to who done the dirty on the showers at Nick's lock?


As for Pomegranates, google says it's a well known cure but surely Pepto Bismol is easier esp as Darwin points out, Pomegranates give some people the voms  sick2:

I give my medical advice freely in the vain hope that you will take potty pity on me... you can choose to take it or not... whistle:

 rubschin:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Miss Demeanour on October 17, 2018, 09:15:49 PM
What happens if you cut them to different sizes ?? rubschin:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Barman on October 18, 2018, 05:43:28 AM
What happens if you cut them to different sizes ?? rubschin:

 rubschin:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Nick on October 19, 2018, 04:26:59 PM
Pink Sis has been in hospital for a week with an "intestinal blockage". They were going to operate but scans reveal a gigantic concrete turd. Laxatives administered and she has spent two days sitting on the bog  ::)

SHe can go home today IF the ambulance has time to get her there before she needs to have a shit again.

I have NO sympathy  redface:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Barman on October 19, 2018, 04:33:41 PM
Pink Sis has been in hospital for a week with an "intestinal blockage". They were going to operate but scans reveal a gigantic concrete turd. Laxatives administered and she has spent two days sitting on the bog  ::)

SHe can go home today IF the ambulance has time to get her there before she needs to have a shit again.

I have NO sympathy  redface:

LL dreams of having a gigantic concrete turd...  noooo:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Nick on October 19, 2018, 04:37:32 PM
Shall I get Pink Sis to post one to her?
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Barman on October 19, 2018, 04:40:31 PM
Shall I get Pink Sis to post one to her?

 :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Steve on October 19, 2018, 04:57:28 PM
Shall I get Pink Sis to post one to her?

 :thumbsup:
facepalm:

Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Nick on October 19, 2018, 04:59:12 PM
I gather there is enough for everyone  sick2:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Steve on October 19, 2018, 05:08:56 PM
I gather there is enough for everyone  sick2:
I don't foresee any queues


BTW gut blockages are not really funny, she's lucky that laxatives sorted it
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Nick on October 19, 2018, 05:12:04 PM
I know, I though she was a goner. It is her birthday in three weeks. I saw a chance of a saving  redface:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Barman on October 19, 2018, 05:18:08 PM
I know, I though she was a goner. It is her birthday in three weeks. I saw a chance of a saving  redface:

Give her the new iPhone!  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Nick on October 19, 2018, 05:21:37 PM
No  evil:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Steve on October 19, 2018, 05:38:36 PM
No  evil:
Give her the old one then - what could possibly go wrong
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Nick on October 19, 2018, 05:40:13 PM
 eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Barman on October 19, 2018, 06:38:15 PM
eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek:

She'd find the pictures and have a heart attack!  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Steve on October 19, 2018, 06:54:31 PM
eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek:

She'd find the pictures and have a heart attack!  eveilgrin:
Nah, she'll find the pictures and shit herself
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Grumpmeister on October 19, 2018, 06:56:37 PM
eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek:

She'd find the pictures and have a heart attack!  eveilgrin:

Large chance of a heart attack, negligible chance of a stroke you say...  rubschin:
Title: Re: The All New Diarrhea Thread
Post by: Barman on October 20, 2018, 04:10:41 AM
eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek:

She'd find the pictures and have a heart attack!  eveilgrin:

Large chance of a heart attack, negligible chance of a stroke you say...  rubschin:

I think Nick has the strokes...   whistle: