The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Nick on September 13, 2007, 12:05:07 PM

Title: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 13, 2007, 12:05:07 PM
Spider webs are bad enough, but scaffolding!!

The house next door is being painted and the scaffolding arrived today. Three oiks in a flatbed truck.

I have heard them clanking about. I just went to the car and they have erected the scaffolding across my back doorstep. I can't get out of the blasted door!!

I had to go to the front, walk round the house and have a word with them!!

Mrs Nick will go bonkers.
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Barman on September 13, 2007, 12:06:07 PM
Spider webs are bad enough, but scaffolding!!

The house next door is being painted and the scaffolding arrived today. Three oiks in a flatbed truck.

I have heard them clanking about. I just went to the car and they have erected the scaffolding across my back doorstep. I can't get out of the blasted door!!

I had to go to the front, walk round the house and have a word with them!!

Mrs Nick will go bonkers.
Poor you...  happy100
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 13, 2007, 12:09:06 PM
Fortunately I am going away this afternoon and not back till Saturday!! happy088
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Snoopy on September 13, 2007, 12:11:26 PM
Had a similar problem when the house next to us was being built.They ever tried pacing some scaffold on my land as the gap between the proposed new property and the boundary was not wide enough they claimed.

I told them remove all scaffolding from my premises, including any that "over-hung". They didn't like it so I called out the Local Authority Buildings Inspector to enforce my right to "Quiet Enjoyment and full access to my property".

I also faxed their parent company HQ and told them I would charge ?500 per day or part day for the use of my land.

The Scaffold was removed within one hour..
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Bar Wench on September 13, 2007, 12:12:33 PM
Fortunately I am going away this afternoon and not back till Saturday!! happy088

Are you not going to be here either?  eeek:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 13, 2007, 12:12:54 PM
Charge them rent. Good plan!! fence:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 13, 2007, 12:13:42 PM
Fortunately I am going away this afternoon and not back till Saturday!! happy088

Are you not going to be here either?  eeek:

No. Found a nice hotel on LAte Rooms. And my meeting tomorrow goes on so long that getting back on a Friday evening would be impossible, obviously.
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Bar Wench on September 13, 2007, 12:14:33 PM
Fortunately I am going away this afternoon and not back till Saturday!! happy088

Are you not going to be here either?  eeek:

No. Found a nice hotel on LAte Rooms. And my meeting tomorrow goes on so long that getting back on a Friday evening would be impossible, obviously.

 sad24:

Where is this? Who are you meeting up with this time?

Late rooms is excellent! We always use them at my work too.
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 13, 2007, 12:15:11 PM
I am going to see a lot of blind people and labradors and a bearded transvestite.
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Snoopy on September 13, 2007, 12:16:40 PM
 eeek:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Barman on September 13, 2007, 12:16:52 PM
Fortunately I am going away this afternoon and not back till Saturday!! happy088

Are you not going to be here either?  eeek:

No. Found a nice hotel on LAte Rooms. And my meeting tomorrow goes on so long that getting back on a Friday evening would be impossible, obviously.

 sad24:

Where is this? Who are you meeting up with this time?

Late rooms is excellent! We always use them at my work too.
It'll be that new bird he keeps going on about...

Rather foolish to leave his house at the mercy of the scaffolding oiks IMHO.  whistle:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 13, 2007, 12:18:09 PM
Oh, Miss Netball Kit 2007, you mean. If only. I have a "meeting" with her later eyes:

The bearded transvestite is also blind, hence the confusion. I suspect no one has thought to tell him/her
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Bar Wench on September 13, 2007, 12:18:30 PM
Oh, Miss Netball Kit 2007, you mean. If only. I have a "meeting" with her later eyes:

The bearded transvestite is also blind, hence the confusion. I suspect no one has thought to tell him/her

What on earth have I missed?
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 13, 2007, 12:20:08 PM
I did mention this a while back. Transvestites are usually unconvincing, being a blind one gives one additional disadvantages in the region of make up, clothing choice and, er, having a beard.
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Barman on September 13, 2007, 12:20:15 PM
Oh, Miss Netball Kit 2007, you mean. If only. I have a "meeting" with her later eyes:

The bearded transvestite is also blind, hence the confusion. I suspect no one has thought to tell him/her

What on earth have I missed?
Do keep up Wenchy... or did we post that in the secret boys area?  rubschin:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 13, 2007, 12:20:43 PM
What is this thread about?
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Barman on September 13, 2007, 12:21:29 PM
What is this thread about?
Wenchy being trapped in a HUGE spider's web...
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Fsigs%2Fsigs-animal-027.gif&hash=4b383e4d6d45740ecdb4371c56d7ca58c1dcc1de) (http://www.freesmileys.org)
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 13, 2007, 12:22:28 PM
Oh yes. Thanks.

So far we have covered fetching netball kit, hotels and blind transvestites. Scaffolding has hardly got a look in!
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Snoopy on September 13, 2007, 12:24:02 PM
I did mention this a while back. Transvestites are usually unconvincing, being a blind one gives one additional disadvantages in the region of make up, clothing choice and, er, having a beard.

There is a difference between getting enjoyment out of dressing in a woman's clothing and being a "drag" queen..
Most TVs enjoy the sensual nature of the female garb but do not wish to be a woman. Don't confuse transvestism with transgenderism. Even if the cross dresser is a scaffolder by day (as I believe some are)
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 13, 2007, 12:24:37 PM
We seem to have found Snoopy's Achilles heel!
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Bar Wench on September 13, 2007, 12:26:23 PM
I was asking about Miss Netball 2007.

That spider is really terrifying. I may have to leave this thread until it reaches page three.  scared2:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 13, 2007, 12:27:47 PM
It's in the Back to School thread I think.

Here

http://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/index.php?topic=1041.180 (http://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/index.php?topic=1041.180)
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Barman on September 13, 2007, 12:28:31 PM
I was asking about Miss Netball 2007.

That spider is really terrifying. I may have to leave this thread until it reaches page three.  scared2:
It will find you... Mwahahaha!
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Femo%2Fdevil12.gif&hash=a470fe0880f56c316933de62d9812bf7dc57f35e) (http://www.freesmileys.org)
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Snoopy on September 13, 2007, 12:29:07 PM
We seem to have found Snoopy's Achilles heel!

Heels, with my bad back ~ don't be silly. ;)
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Sour Puss on September 16, 2007, 12:21:33 AM
What is this thread about?
Wenchy being trapped in a HUGE spider's web...
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Fsigs%2Fsigs-animal-027.gif&hash=4b383e4d6d45740ecdb4371c56d7ca58c1dcc1de) (http://www.freesmileys.org)

I say,that is cute, I was only allowed to keep these. (https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.msnemotions.org%2Femoticons%2Fuploads%2Fspider343.gif&hash=8eb8adb9e536071142e2f2ddfde87f3724cb1e2d)  (https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.entity.cc%2Fcentral%2Fspider%2Fspider3.gif&hash=2c3fab9a65358ad62a029da1e1571944ff18ff60) (https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.msnemotions.org%2Femoticons%2Fuploads%2Fspider343.gif&hash=8eb8adb9e536071142e2f2ddfde87f3724cb1e2d)
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Barman on September 16, 2007, 08:33:16 AM
Ooo... I like that one... (https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.msnemotions.org%2Femoticons%2Fuploads%2Fspider343.gif&hash=8eb8adb9e536071142e2f2ddfde87f3724cb1e2d)
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Sour Puss on September 16, 2007, 09:40:42 AM
Ooo... I like that one... (https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.msnemotions.org%2Femoticons%2Fuploads%2Fspider343.gif&hash=8eb8adb9e536071142e2f2ddfde87f3724cb1e2d)

Funny, where did Wenchy go?   whistle:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Snoopy on September 16, 2007, 09:41:39 AM
Last seen legging it up the virtual Village High Street.  lol:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 16, 2007, 12:56:52 PM
Last seen legging it up the virtual Village High Street.  lol:
I had no idea 'legging it' was in her repertoire. whistle:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Snoopy on September 16, 2007, 01:14:37 PM
Last seen legging it up the virtual Village High Street.  lol:
I had no idea 'legging it' was in her repertoire. whistle:

Like a speeding bullet if there is a large enough spider looking her way  lol:

Why am I laughing ~ It's a race between us for the door.  redface:

SPIDERS  scared2:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Bar Wench on September 17, 2007, 07:41:46 AM
I'd forgotten what this thread contained.  eeek:

Mr Wench was awoken at 3am to move the spider that he said wouldn't move from the ceiling. It had. On to my bedside table.  scared2:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Barman on September 17, 2007, 07:43:39 AM
I'd forgotten what this thread contained.  eeek:

Mr Wench was awoken at 3am to move the spider that he said wouldn't move from the ceiling. It had. On to my bedside table.  scared2:
Via your face prolly...  whistle:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Bar Wench on September 17, 2007, 07:47:35 AM
I'd forgotten what this thread contained.  eeek:

Mr Wench was awoken at 3am to move the spider that he said wouldn't move from the ceiling. It had. On to my bedside table.  scared2:
Via your face prolly...  whistle:

Prolly. What's that statistic about how many spiders the average human eats whilst asleep? Terrifying.  scared2:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Barman on September 17, 2007, 07:48:28 AM
I'd forgotten what this thread contained.  eeek:

Mr Wench was awoken at 3am to move the spider that he said wouldn't move from the ceiling. It had. On to my bedside table.  scared2:
Via your face prolly...  whistle:

Prolly. What's that statistic about how many spiders the average human eats whilst asleep? Terrifying.  scared2:
Women = five-a-night...
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Bar Wench on September 17, 2007, 07:49:45 AM
 sick2: noooo: sick2: scared2:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Misunderstood on September 17, 2007, 11:12:39 AM
Is it me, or are there quite a lot of spider threads about?

 spider:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 17, 2007, 11:19:49 AM
I have webs all over my wing mirrors. I took the vehicle through one of those brushy car washes yesterday. They are still there. What is that stuff made of?
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Miss Demeanour on September 17, 2007, 11:32:02 AM

I don't mind spiders too much - they are die quietly.
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 17, 2007, 11:33:23 AM

Quote
I don't mind spiders too much - they are die quietly

Que?

And if that means "all" I am even more worried about your techniques eeek:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Miss Demeanour on September 17, 2007, 11:48:51 AM
I am even more worried about your techniques eeek:

The axe is a bit rusty  noooo:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 17, 2007, 11:49:58 AM
Axe on Spiders?

Tell Wench. I will warn Mr Wench.

OK?
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Miss Demeanour on September 17, 2007, 11:53:13 AM
I will warn Mr Wench.

Do you not think Mr Wench has enough to worry about on a daily basis  lol:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Snoopy on September 17, 2007, 11:54:46 AM
I will warn Mr Wench.

Do you not think Mr Wench has enough to worry about on a daily basis  lol:


Nah! He's trained for it.
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 17, 2007, 11:55:18 AM
She berates dead people. But he may have that to look forward too quite soon
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Bar Wench on September 17, 2007, 11:56:15 AM
 evil:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Misunderstood on September 17, 2007, 03:01:13 PM
I have webs all over my wing mirrors. I took the vehicle through one of those brushy car washes yesterday. They are still there. What is that stuff made of?

I don't know but they are making bulletproof jackets out of it now, so it must be pretty hardwearing.

Beats a Karscher every time.
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: MargaRita on September 19, 2007, 05:15:52 PM
Hi, just making a completely pointless post so that I can make the 10 and get the smileys  ::)

I thought no-one would notice on one of Nick's threads.   ;D
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Snoopy on September 19, 2007, 05:48:59 PM
What a good plan. Now with number 11 you can try them all out. [more] reveals all sorts of possibilities. whistle:

Thought no-one would notice on one of Nick's threads eh?
Nothing gets past the Pub Hound!
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Nick on September 19, 2007, 08:16:09 PM
Nor me! evil:
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Misunderstood on September 19, 2007, 10:57:31 PM
WHO woke me up ???
Title: Re: I am trapped!
Post by: Darwins Selection on September 21, 2007, 09:58:09 AM
a Karscher

Bless you.