The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => The Comedy Room => Topic started by: Marley's Ghost (Imbiber of Spirits) on October 17, 2007, 04:33:19 PM
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Whilst idling away a little time a la Berek, I came across something for DS! (http://www.break.com/index/farmer-unclogs-fertilizer-tank.html)
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Whilst idling away a little time a la Berek, I came across something for DS!{/url]
(http://www.break.com/index/farmer-unclogs-fertilizer-tank.html)
Never approach anything that dispenses sh1t, from that direction. noooo:
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Whilst idling away a little time a la Berek, I came across something for DS!{/url]
(http://www.break.com/index/farmer-unclogs-fertilizer-tank.html)
Never approach anything that dispenses sh1t, from that direction. noooo:
Valuable advice DS - though lost on the likes of this guy:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.bbc.co.uk%2Fmusic%2Fpopchart%2Fartist%2Fimages%2Fgeorgemichael_205.jpg%3F&hash=1477dd35a5270cd179c79b274e7486df07e4b07c)
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Only one question ~ why would anyone be filming a farmer spreading shit anyway? Surely a "put up video"
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Only one question ~ why would anyone be filming a farmer spreading shit anyway? Surely a "put up videa"
Ageed... amazing what people will do for £250... noooo:
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A new line of business for you Darwin!
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ljacob.com%2Ffiles%2Fpigs.jpg&hash=b3c2cee4d01653314391ba0c9bad8c054f3d2adb)
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A new line of business for you Darwin!
[ image removed in the interests of readability! ]
If only it was a total spoof - but it's all too likely to be true! Or, at least it fits with the other madness emanating from DEFRA and all other Whitehall departments!
I despair of this country - and the EU. I see Bruin is off to sign us all up to the European Constitution Treaty - where's our referendum you bastard?
Oh, by the way, drumroll:
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A new line of business for you Darwin!
Oh right, I never thought of that! whistle: eyes:
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Ah ~ Does that mean the turkeys have ..... errrr..... flown the coop?
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Ah ~ Does that mean the turkeys have ..... errrr..... flown the coop?
No, he will still be raising turkeys, but will now have supplementary income from not raising pigs, cows, sheep, geese, giraffes, ostriches and elephants. Not to mention the set aside from all the land he doesn't have. And, once he's sold the turkeys at Christmas time, he can go on the dole as he'll be technically unemployed despite being in receipt of gazillions of pounds for not raising all that livestock - and, as a bonus, he can then claim for not raising turkeys.
Easy really.
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Gosh! Cripes! and all that ~ I wish I was clever like wot U R
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Ah ~ Does that mean the turkeys have ..... errrr..... flown the coop?
No, he will still be raising turkeys, but will now have supplementary income from not raising pigs, cows, sheep, geese, giraffes, ostriches and elephants. Not to mention the set aside from all the land he doesn't have. And, once he's sold the turkeys at Christmas time, he can go on the dole as he'll be technically unemployed despite being in receipt of gazillions of pounds for not raising all that livestock - and, as a bonus, he can then claim for not raising turkeys.
Easy really.
Unfortunately a supertax is being levied on parsnip production… whistle:
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Ah ~ Does that mean the turkeys have ..... errrr..... flown the coop?
No, he will still be raising turkeys, but will now have supplementary income from not raising pigs, cows, sheep, geese, giraffes, ostriches and elephants. Not to mention the set aside from all the land he doesn't have. And, once he's sold the turkeys at Christmas time, he can go on the dole as he'll be technically unemployed despite being in receipt of gazillions of pounds for not raising all that livestock - and, as a bonus, he can then claim for not raising turkeys.
Easy really.
Unfortunately a supertax is being levied on parsnip production… whistle:
doh:
I told you to stick to turnips.
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Ah ~ Does that mean the turkeys have ..... errrr..... flown the coop?
No, he will still be raising turkeys, but will now have supplementary income from not raising pigs, cows, sheep, geese, giraffes, ostriches and elephants. Not to mention the set aside from all the land he doesn't have. And, once he's sold the turkeys at Christmas time, he can go on the dole as he'll be technically unemployed despite being in receipt of gazillions of pounds for not raising all that livestock - and, as a bonus, he can then claim for not raising turkeys.
Easy really.
Unfortunately a supertax is being levied on parsnip production… whistle:
doh:
I told you to stick to turnips.
I'm also reliably informed that turnips are very good fodder for the livestock you are not raising - plus, you can sell them to the supermarkets after not feeding them to the stock you are not raising. Got it?
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Ah ~ Does that mean the turkeys have ..... errrr..... flown the coop?
No, he will still be raising turkeys, but will now have supplementary income from not raising pigs, cows, sheep, geese, giraffes, ostriches and elephants. Not to mention the set aside from all the land he doesn't have. And, once he's sold the turkeys at Christmas time, he can go on the dole as he'll be technically unemployed despite being in receipt of gazillions of pounds for not raising all that livestock - and, as a bonus, he can then claim for not raising turkeys.
Easy really.
Unfortunately a supertax is being levied on parsnip production… whistle:
doh:
I told you to stick to turnips.
Oh yes, turnips... redface: That's the second time I've fucked that joke up isn't it? noooo:
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Yep. ::)
And now you've used a naughty word. What a wanker. ::)
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Yep. ::)
And now you've used a naughty word. What a wanker. ::)
redface:
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noooo:
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Oh yes, turnips... redface: That's the second time I've fucked that joke up isn't it?
At least. ::)
Pearls before swine, you do what you can to help them out but no, in one ear and out the other, I wonder why I bother sometimes I really do. Too much time out in the sun and knocking back cheap booze has eroded his limited intellect to the point where he probably has trouble following the plot of Noggin the Nogg. I despair mumble...mumble...