The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Berek on January 03, 2008, 07:27:27 PM

Title: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Berek on January 03, 2008, 07:27:27 PM
An incinerator for the garden !!!!, really pissed off the bloke next door who has a bbq every night in the summer, now he can have the sweet smell of Begsy burning the evidence and the cardboard the council wont recycle
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Nick on January 03, 2008, 07:28:30 PM
Ah you are back. Burn tyres. That's my advice! evil:
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Berek on January 03, 2008, 07:30:30 PM
I'm already saving up the plastic lemonade bottles
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Nick on January 03, 2008, 07:31:00 PM
Is that good? scared2:
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Darwins Selection on January 03, 2008, 07:36:13 PM
Is that good? scared2:
It will be when he's "filled" them.
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Barman on January 04, 2008, 06:03:36 AM
An incinerator for the garden !!!!, really pissed off the bloke next door who has a bbq every night in the summer, now he can have the sweet smell of Begsy burning the evidence and the cardboard the council wont recycle
lol:
Welcome back!
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Landlady on January 04, 2008, 07:54:32 AM
An incinerator for the garden !!!!, really pissed off the bloke next door who has a bbq every night in the summer, now he can have the sweet smell of Begsy burning the evidence and the cardboard the council wont recycle

Why is it a problem with him bbq'ing in the summer evening?
Is he a nasty man  rubschin:
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Snoopy on January 04, 2008, 10:03:40 AM
It'll be a problem because some people who BBQ in their gardens do so until late into the evening, create a lot of foul smelling smoke by not knowing what they are doing, drink to excess and ask a lot of chavvy friends round to join in the fun. I have neighbours like that (or did have until I got the council onto them)
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Grumpmeister on January 04, 2008, 10:17:36 AM
It'll be a problem because some people who BBQ in their gardens do so until late into the evening, create a lot of foul smelling smoke by not knowing what they are doing, drink to excess and ask a lot of chavvy friends round to join in the fun. I have neighbours like that (or did have until I got the council onto them)

And of course the foul smell would have nothing to do with the pooch next door marking his territory in the BBQ pan the night before...  whistle:
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Snoopy on January 04, 2008, 10:59:52 AM
It'll be a problem because some people who BBQ in their gardens do so until late into the evening, create a lot of foul smelling smoke by not knowing what they are doing, drink to excess and ask a lot of chavvy friends round to join in the fun. I have neighbours like that (or did have until I got the council onto them)

And of course the foul smell would have nothing to do with the pooch next door marking his territory in the BBQ pan the night before...  whistle:

 rubschin: Thinking about it ~ NO!

More to do with (a) his inability to light a BBQ without resort to large quantities of firelighters and BBQ "Starter" fluid and (b) his cooking of fatty meats and resultant flames as the fat dripped onto the embers being dealt with by wafting at them with a tea-towel and when that failed to work squirting the flames with a water filled indoor plant sprayer. The man was/is a total tosser but has now sold up and moved because "People round here don't know how to enjoy themselves".

His other annoying habits included using a "Boom Box" on his patio at 1am, cutting breeze blocks with an angle grinder at midnight, "mending" his collection of vans and cars at midnight and again at 5am with the car/van radio blaring and having two obnoxious children who whined day and night.

His failure to respond to verbal pleas to "Turn it down a bit mate" and "Don't you think the garage might be a better place to mend that?" ~ followed by written requests to "live and let live in peace" resulted in a number of visits from the Council "Public Protection Unit" and the Local Plod until he finally got the message. The cheer from the neighbours when the FOR SALE board went up was very embarrassing for his wife, a mouse of a woman who I am told has finally plucked up the courage to leave the selfish, loud mouthed, shell suited, scouse git.
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Nick on January 04, 2008, 11:03:45 AM
Not an ideal neighbour then rubschin:
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Snoopy on January 04, 2008, 11:06:20 AM
Not one I would have chosen no. evil:
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Barman on January 04, 2008, 11:59:36 AM
Not one I would have chosen no. evil:
Do you still write?  rubschin:
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Uncle Mort on January 04, 2008, 12:09:07 PM
Only Christmas cards.  ;)
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Snoopy on January 04, 2008, 12:13:05 PM
Not one I would have chosen no. evil:
Do you still write?  rubschin:

Not now that his white van is no longer there to scrawl upon  whistle:
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Uncle Mort on January 04, 2008, 12:25:59 PM
White vans  cussing:

There's been an increase of white vans in the road I live on and they always seem to be badly parked. The neighbour across the road has acquired a BIG white van which he often parks close to my drive causing me problems in seeing if anything is coming up the road when I pull out. There's no room on his side of the road as he already has two ice-cream vans and a car.

Then there's the neighbour two doors down. His white van is a bugger to start and he has to keep turning the engine over until it fires up. Then he revs it until he's confident enough that it wont stall.

Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Snoopy on January 04, 2008, 12:42:11 PM
Deserving of a thread of its own ~ this could run and run.












Hopefully BM doesn't run a white van for his other enterprises. whistle:
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Barman on January 05, 2008, 09:41:21 AM
Deserving of a thread of its own ~ this could run and run.

Hopefully BM doesn't run a white van for his other enterprises. whistle:
noooo:
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: grumpyoldsoldier on January 05, 2008, 05:29:35 PM
It'll be a problem because some people who BBQ in their gardens do so until late into the evening, create a lot of foul smelling smoke by not knowing what they are doing, drink to excess and ask a lot of chavvy friends round to join in the fun. I have neighbours like that (or did have until I got the council onto them)

Damn! I just love that phrase, I got the council onto them guaranteed  to strike fear into the souls of even the hardest Fireside Fusilier. Outstanding Snoopy,  ;D you are my hero
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Darwins Selection on January 05, 2008, 05:37:02 PM
It'll be a problem because some people who BBQ in their gardens do so until late into the evening, create a lot of foul smelling smoke by not knowing what they are doing, drink to excess and ask a lot of chavvy friends round to join in the fun. I have neighbours like that (or did have until I got the council onto them)

Damn! I just love that phrase, I got the council onto them guaranteed  to strike fear into the souls of even the hardest Fireside Fusilier. Outstanding Snoopy,  ;D you are my hero

Do I detect a smidgen of sarcasm there?
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Miss Demeanour on January 05, 2008, 05:39:44 PM
Do I detect a smidgen of sarcasm there?

Us poor Council workers never get any good press do we  cry:
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: Darwins Selection on January 05, 2008, 06:23:17 PM
Do I detect a smidgen of sarcasm there?

Us poor Council workers never get any good press do we  cry:
happy100
Title: Re: What I bought myself for Xmas
Post by: grumpyoldsoldier on January 05, 2008, 06:32:10 PM
It'll be a problem because some people who BBQ in their gardens do so until late into the evening, create a lot of foul smelling smoke by not knowing what they are doing, drink to excess and ask a lot of chavvy friends round to join in the fun. I have neighbours like that (or did have until I got the council onto them)

Damn! I just love that phrase, I got the council onto them guaranteed  to strike fear into the souls of even the hardest Fireside Fusilier. Outstanding Snoopy,  ;D you are my hero

Do I detect a smidgen of sarcasm there?
Not at all Ds, I thought it was bloody brill ;D