The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Nick on January 26, 2008, 04:51:24 PM

Title: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Nick on January 26, 2008, 04:51:24 PM
1. Mobile phone after cat weed on it (replaced)
2. Computer (repaired)
3. Vacuum cleaner (replaced)
4. Phone lines (repaired)
5. Car in pothole = nearly £400
6. Cat - diarrhoea
7. Mrs Nick - temper tantrum (why?)

The expense, The horror. The angry ("WTF have you been?" clients

 Banghead
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Barman on January 26, 2008, 04:56:03 PM
Did you forget the lawn mower?
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Nick on January 26, 2008, 05:10:05 PM
No, that is still in the Dining Room of course noooo:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Snoopy on January 26, 2008, 06:14:35 PM
Oh dear.   noooo:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Nick on January 26, 2008, 06:15:13 PM
Goodnight. The Boy is "performing" this evening scared2:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Barman on January 26, 2008, 08:20:59 PM
No, that is still in the Dining Room of course noooo:
Of course... doh:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: grumpyoldsoldier on January 28, 2008, 07:42:32 AM
Things that blow up? Would that include Debbie who I keep in a box under the bed? whistle:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Barman on January 28, 2008, 07:56:47 AM
Things that blow up? Would that include Debbie who I keep in a box under the bed? whistle:
You don’t inflate her every, um.. time do you?  noooo:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: grumpyoldsoldier on January 28, 2008, 08:00:08 AM
Of course, I am not a cad sir. noooo:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Barman on January 28, 2008, 08:08:43 AM
Of course, I am not a cad sir. noooo:
Good man... carry on.  whistle:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Grumpmeister on January 28, 2008, 10:36:36 AM
You got revenge on the cat when you cleaned up afterwards I see


(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FaV1yWSKr.jpg&hash=c6862f214bb4be6ef49e105d440d7ef767996659) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=aV1yWSKr)
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Nick on January 28, 2008, 10:39:06 AM
Mrs Nick has just borrowed my SatNav. What can possibly go wrong? scared2:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Barman on January 28, 2008, 10:40:19 AM
Mrs Nick has just borrowed my SatNav. What can possibly go wrong? scared2:
Saves digging up the patio I suppose…  whistle:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Grumpmeister on January 28, 2008, 10:40:29 AM
As long as she can get out of the range of the Nick-o-rays she should be fine  whistle:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Nick on January 28, 2008, 10:42:35 AM
SHe is going nowhere. The dustbin lorry has just driven into her new car noooo:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Barman on January 28, 2008, 10:44:05 AM
SHe is going nowhere. The dustbin lorry has just driven into her new car noooo:
happy001




 redface: sorry  redface:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Grumpmeister on January 28, 2008, 10:47:49 AM
BM you do realise that it will be Nicks falt the lorry crashed into the car   point:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Nick on January 28, 2008, 10:47:55 AM
She's in a bit of a strop scared2:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Nick on January 28, 2008, 10:48:46 AM
BM you do realise that it will be Nicks falt the lorry crashed into the car   point:

It isn't my fault yet, but it soon will be. She has also left all the Boy's library books in Port Sunlight. That appears to be my fault too scared2:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Barman on January 28, 2008, 10:50:10 AM
BM you do realise that it will be Nicks falt the lorry crashed into the car   point:

It isn't my fault yet, but it soon will be. She has also left all the Boy's library books in Port Sunlight. That appears to be my fault too scared2:
happy100

Not a great start to the week for you then...  noooo:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Nick on January 28, 2008, 10:53:52 AM
All downhill from here I expect. evil:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Grumpmeister on January 28, 2008, 10:54:40 AM
Its the Nick-o-rays I tell you  scared2:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Just One More on January 28, 2008, 11:23:50 AM
SHe is going nowhere. The dustbin lorry has just driven into her new car noooo:

Nicks car is removed from the scene

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FPqjGR3i.jpg&hash=ae59f7c6daaf7ac5d191d2cad5af52095b4692f9) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=PqjGR3i)
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Snoopy on January 28, 2008, 12:00:41 PM
You have my sympathy Nick.
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Nick on January 28, 2008, 12:01:40 PM
Body armour would be more useful! evil:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Grumpmeister on January 28, 2008, 12:07:06 PM
Nick you dont need body armour. I've had a theory for a long time that the only way you could have survuved this long is that you are in fact indestructible.  noooo:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Snoopy on January 28, 2008, 12:18:29 PM
Body armour would be more useful! evil:


Put your faith in the "sword of truth and trusty shield of fair play" .....

Jonathon Aitken did and look where it got him  rubschin: I see your problem.
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Nick on January 28, 2008, 12:20:48 PM
Before she went out I reminded her not to leave the Satnav in the car. She didn't. She just got back. She left it in the library instead noooo:

She now has to drive back there to retrieve it AND take her car to the body shop for an estimate. She can't find the body shop without the Satnav. And she doesn't know how to work the Satnav. Banghead
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Darwins Selection on January 28, 2008, 12:28:51 PM
SHe is going nowhere. The dustbin lorry has just driven into her new car noooo:
Over the years I have wondered if this sort of thing is just bad luck.

In cases other than Nick's, the remarkable correlation between outward symbols of wealth and damage by those who might resent their less fortunate station in life, might lead one to think there is some "leveling" going on.

The next time you are waiting by the luggage carousel, notice how it is mostly the Louis Vuitton and Gucci cases that sport the boot prints and tyre tracks.
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: grumpyoldsoldier on January 28, 2008, 12:35:21 PM
Bloody Hell Darwin, that is really profound, I bet you have an 'ology or sumfink happ096
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Darwins Selection on January 28, 2008, 01:01:49 PM
Bloody Hell Darwin, that is really profound, I bet you have an 'ology or sumfink happ096

 redface:
My entire life has not been wasted.

Oh overwhelming joy. . .
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Barman on January 28, 2008, 01:04:12 PM
Bloody Hell Darwin, that is really profound, I bet you have an 'ology or sumfink happ096
A degree from the McShite University I beleive...  whistle:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Nick on January 28, 2008, 01:12:29 PM
I am selling them. Send a PO for £6.50 for your degree certificate.
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Barman on January 28, 2008, 01:13:42 PM
I am selling them. Send a PO for £6.50 for your degree certificate.
Do I get fries and a drink with that?  whistle:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Snoopy on January 28, 2008, 01:15:46 PM
Can I "go large" and get a PHD?
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Nick on January 28, 2008, 01:16:21 PM
Have you been buying those online pills too then? At least you are keeping the thread on topic
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Barman on January 28, 2008, 01:17:56 PM
Have you been buying those online pills too then? At least you are keeping the thread on topic
Who?  shrugs:
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Darwins Selection on January 28, 2008, 01:22:28 PM
Have you been buying those online pills too then? At least you are keeping the thread on topic
Who?  shrugs:

We all are.

Egos are still blowing up as I type.
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Nick on January 28, 2008, 01:25:29 PM
Have you been buying those online pills too then? At least you are keeping the thread on topic
Who?  shrugs:
Snoopy of course
Title: Re: Things that blow up or down
Post by: Barman on January 28, 2008, 01:27:23 PM
Have you been buying those online pills too then? At least you are keeping the thread on topic
Who?  shrugs:
Snoopy of course
Oh...  rubschin: