The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: The Moan Ranger on February 18, 2008, 12:37:13 PM
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I sent this to Mrs TMR. As I thought it was quite funny.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/7233565.stm
The daggers she is throwing me across the office are quite spectacular.
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Tell her to double the intensity and add mine to them! evil:
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I sent this to Mrs TMR. As I thought it was quite funny.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/7233565.stm
The daggers she is throwing me across the office are quite spectacular.
Whoops!
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This could well cost you another lobster!
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Tell her to double the intensity and add mine to them! evil:
I appear to have touched a nerve... scared2:
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evil:
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I think someone is suffering from post holiday blues... surrender:
(And she hasn't changed her message signature...)
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I think someone is suffering from post holiday blues... surrender:
(And she hasn't changed her message signature...)
I am. That and post illness.
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Are you gonna take me home tonight
Ah down beside that red firelight
Are you gonna let it all hang out
Fat bottomed girls
You make the rockin' world go round
Hey I was just a skinny lad
Never knew no good from bad
But I knew life before I left my nursery
Left alone with big fat Fanny
She was such a naughty nanny
Heap big woman you made a bad boy out of me
Hey hey!
I've been singing with my band
Across the wire across the land
I seen ev'ry blue eyed floozy on the way
But their beauty and their style
Went kind of smooth after a while
Take me to them dirty ladies every time
Oh won't you take me home tonight?
Oh down beside your red firelight
Oh and you give it all you got
Fat bottomed girls you make the rockin' world go round
Fat bottomed girls you make the rockin' world go round
Hey listen here
Now your mortgages and homes
I got stiffness in the bones
Ain't no beauty queens in this locality (I tell you)
Oh but I still get my pleasure
Still got my greatest treasure
Heap big woman you gonna make a big man out of me
Now get this
Oh you gonna take me home tonight (please)
Oh down beside your red firelight
Oh you gonna let it all hang out
Fat bottomed girls you make the rockin' world go round
Fat bottomed girls you make the rockin' world go round
Get on your bikes and ride
Oooh yeah them fat bottomed girls
Fat bottomed girls
Yeah yeah yeah
Fat bottomed girls
;D
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Tee, hee.
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I suppose you could always start playing Spinal Tap in the office... whistle:
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41APzy5kqBU
::)
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I can vaguely remember seeing something on TV about Japanese females buying "buttock pads" to make them look more like western women. Japanese woman tend to have "flat" bottoms rather than rounded.
(I was going to start that with "Many moons ago" but thought better of it)
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I understand that "Contour Pants" are selling well at M & S.
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It all goes to prove that man can never really understand the female psyche. It is my considered opinion that they are all, in fact, completely mad.
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A female friend of mine once asked me if I was bum, tit or leg man.
I replied "Yes".
She didn't believe me.
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A female friend of mine once asked me if I was bum, tit or leg man.
I replied "Yes".
She didn't believe me.
I do. whistle:
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A female friend of mine once asked me if I was bum, tit or leg man.
I replied "Yes".
She didn't believe me.
I do. whistle:
I have no problem with that... whistle:
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A female friend of mine once asked me if I was bum, tit or leg man.
I replied "Yes".
She didn't believe me.
I do. whistle:
I have no problem with that... whistle:
Makes perfect sense to me whistle:
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A female friend of mine once asked me if I was bum, tit or leg man.
I replied "Yes".
She didn't believe me.
I do. whistle:
I have no problem with that... whistle:
And that is ok then.....?
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A female friend of mine once asked me if I was bum, tit or leg man.
I replied "Yes".
She didn't believe me.
I do. whistle:
I have no problem with that... whistle:
And that is.....?
shrugs:
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Sorry, interrupted and ran out of fingers.
Women do seem to make assumptions about what you like/dislike about females.
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That's so easy to answer. Most men like any woman who says yes. Why complicate matters .... she may not actually appeal but beggars can't be choosers after all.
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I think Snoops is pretty much right. However, if given a choice I would imagine that most men would have a preference.
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I think Snoops is pretty much right. However, if given a choice I would imagine that most men would have a preference.
Indeed but how often are we offered a choice.
Turn down a cert because she has a large bust just because you are a "leg man" and you'll go home and make love to your hand nine times out of ten. I don't care if she has legs like a Queen Anne Table so long as they open on demand.
Sorry Wenchy .... this is all a bit sordid isn't it.
To redeem myself I do prefer pretty girls who can laugh at themselves.
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Agreed, pretty girls who can laugh at themselves and can be engaged in a decent conversation about the best way for the English rugby team to improve their performance.
The ability to be able to put their ankles behind their ears is also preferable, if not compulsory.
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I think Snoops is pretty much right. However, if given a choice I would imagine that most men would have a preference.
Indeed but how often are we offered a choice.
Turn down a cert because she has a large bust just because you are a "leg man" and you'll go home and make love to your hand nine times out of ten. I don't care if she has legs like a Queen Anne Table so long as they open on demand.
Sorry Wenchy .... this is all a bit sordid isn't it.
To redeem myself I do prefer pretty girls who can laugh at themselves.
Quite alright. You are just confirming everything I already suspected!
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Agreed, pretty girls who can laugh at themselves and can be engaged in a decent conversation about the best way for the English rugby team to improve their performance.
The ability to be able to put their ankles behind their ears is also preferable, if not compulsory.
A flexible friend?
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I think Snoops is pretty much right. However, if given a choice I would imagine that most men would have a preference.
Indeed but how often are we offered a choice.
Turn down a cert because she has a large bust just because you are a "leg man" and you'll go home and make love to your hand nine times out of ten. I don't care if she has legs like a Queen Anne Table so long as they open on demand.
Sorry Wenchy .... this is all a bit sordid isn't it.
To redeem myself I do prefer pretty girls who can laugh at themselves.
Quite alright. You are just confirming everything I already suspected!
Y'know we haven't been at all like this whilst you have been away. rubschin:
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I think Snoops is pretty much right. However, if given a choice I would imagine that most men would have a preference.
Indeed but how often are we offered a choice.
Turn down a cert because she has a large bust just because you are a "leg man" and you'll go home and make love to your hand nine times out of ten. I don't care if she has legs like a Queen Anne Table so long as they open on demand.
Sorry Wenchy .... this is all a bit sordid isn't it.
To redeem myself I do prefer pretty girls who can laugh at themselves.
Quite alright. You are just confirming everything I already suspected!
At this point Snoop I'd suggest giving up and staying quiet. Anything else you say will probably dig that hole you've landed in with Wenchy even deeper... whistle:
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I think Snoops is pretty much right. However, if given a choice I would imagine that most men would have a preference.
Indeed but how often are we offered a choice.
Turn down a cert because she has a large bust just because you are a "leg man" and you'll go home and make love to your hand nine times out of ten. I don't care if she has legs like a Queen Anne Table so long as they open on demand.
Sorry Wenchy .... this is all a bit sordid isn't it.
To redeem myself I do prefer pretty girls who can laugh at themselves.
Quite alright. You are just confirming everything I already suspected!
At this point Snoop I'd suggest giving up and staying quiet. Anything else you say will probably dig that hole you've landed in with Wenchy even deeper... whistle:
I'm in a hole with Wenchy eeek:
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I think Snoops is pretty much right. However, if given a choice I would imagine that most men would have a preference.
Indeed but how often are we offered a choice.
Turn down a cert because she has a large bust just because you are a "leg man" and you'll go home and make love to your hand nine times out of ten. I don't care if she has legs like a Queen Anne Table so long as they open on demand.
Sorry Wenchy .... this is all a bit sordid isn't it.
To redeem myself I do prefer pretty girls who can laugh at themselves.
Quite alright. You are just confirming everything I already suspected!
Y'know we haven't been at all like this whilst you have been away. rubschin:
rubschin:
You're right actually...
Wenchy, you bad, bad girl! cussing:
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It's all right though Wenchy .... we know a big girl made you do it. lol:
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I'm getting blamed?!?!?!? eeek:
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Of course ~ why do you think we missed you?
Teach you to eat the rock on the way home and forget the straw donkey.
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Peace offering?
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm3.static.flickr.com%2F2235%2F2271838552_6e2efa2c89.jpg%3Fv%3D0&hash=a826f5fb8797402280b094f2bc323816bfda0357)
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Peace offering?
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm3.static.flickr.com%2F2235%2F2271838552_6e2efa2c89.jpg%3Fv%3D0&hash=a826f5fb8797402280b094f2bc323816bfda0357)
So is Wench ill again from going over the top with eating?
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No plane germs. I didn't actually buy any sweeties, I bought these instead!
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm3.static.flickr.com%2F2283%2F2271044881_8cc3329222.jpg%3Fv%3D0&hash=48f56ec514969cac9536c62297e74c9b9a16c985)
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So you got ill from eating pesticides. ::)
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Why are those strawberries flat?
Spanish?
Not firm and plump like English ones!
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Why are those strawberries flat?
Spanish?
Not firm and plump like English ones!
Nothing like a juicy plump English one is there?
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Why are those strawberries flat?
Spanish?
Not firm and plump like English ones!
Nothing like a juicy plump English one is there?
We are of like minds there. ;D
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And you are all off again. ::)
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And you are all off again. ::)
You started us off! point:
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Leg men? eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm3.static.flickr.com%2F2333%2F2271835884_08869b5ffb.jpg%3Fv%3D0&hash=76df6cdc4124ec8f3098124741e40d755ee04bcc)
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And you are all off again. ::)
Maybe they should rename this site 'Dirty Old Men' whistle:
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And you are all off again. ::)
Maybe they should rename this site 'Dirty Old Men' whistle:
Only if we all throw out our PCs and get Macs
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And you are all off again. ::)
Maybe they should rename this site 'Dirty Old Men' whistle:
Dirty old men... and their long suffering Wench... whistle:
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And you are all off again. ::)
Maybe they should rename this site 'Dirty Old Men' whistle:
Only if we all throw out our PCs and get Macs
drumroll:
You're on a roll today sir! lol:
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Leg men? eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm3.static.flickr.com%2F2333%2F2271835884_08869b5ffb.jpg%3Fv%3D0&hash=76df6cdc4124ec8f3098124741e40d755ee04bcc)
You do car boot sales as well.
Keeps the tat mountain under control I suppose.
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And you are all off again. ::)
Maybe they should rename this site 'Dirty Old Men' whistle:
Only if we all throw out our PCs and get Macs
drumroll:
You're on a roll today sir! lol:
redface: It's the new pills.
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And you are all off again. ::)
Maybe they should rename this site 'Dirty Old Men' whistle:
Only if we all throw out our PCs and get Macs
drumroll:
You're on a roll today sir! lol:
redface: It's the new pills.
[whisper] Can I have some? [/whisper]