The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Nick on March 13, 2008, 01:30:33 PM

Title: WHY
Post by: Nick on March 13, 2008, 01:30:33 PM
ARE



THEY




STILL






CALLING





HIM





A











CANOEIST? Banghead

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/tees/7293765.stm (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/tees/7293765.stm)
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Bar Wench on March 13, 2008, 01:36:01 PM
BECAUSE







HE






IS






ONE
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Nick on March 13, 2008, 01:38:36 PM
NO







HE





IS/WAS







NOT
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Bar Wench on March 13, 2008, 01:46:05 PM
HE





HAS





BEEN





IN





CHARGE





OF





A





CANOE





SO





HE





MUST





BE
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Nick on March 13, 2008, 01:48:31 PM
I


HAVE



BEEN




IN




CHARGE





OF




A






TELLY




THAT





DOES





NOT









MAKE










ME






A










DIRECTOR









OR









EVEN







AN







ENGINEER
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Bar Wench on March 13, 2008, 01:49:38 PM
So what does one have to do to be considered a canoeist then?
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Snoopy on March 13, 2008, 01:49:50 PM
Perhaps



they



mean




Onanist



but




can't




spell






it.
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Bar Wench on March 13, 2008, 01:50:33 PM
Feck off!
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Snoopy on March 13, 2008, 01:52:54 PM
Feck off!

Yes Ma'am .... straight away ma'am. Sorry ma'am








PS Being in charge of a telly in your case Nick could make you either a box or a remote control.
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Nick on March 13, 2008, 01:53:07 PM
He ran a B&B or summat. The canoe was a deception!
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Bar Wench on March 13, 2008, 01:53:51 PM
He ran a B&B or summat. The canoe was a deception!

But what is the deffinition of a canoeist then?
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Nick on March 13, 2008, 01:54:49 PM
Feck off!

Yes Maam .... staright away maam. Sorry maam








PS Having a telly in your case Nick could make you either a box or a remote control.

Our telly is in a box at present cussing:

And The Boy sneaked down to my office and was on the internet from 10 last night until 3.30 this morning!! I had unplugged the machine and hidden the cable. He found another and re plumbed it!¬ Banghead Banghead
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Nick on March 13, 2008, 01:55:30 PM
He ran a B&B or summat. The canoe was a deception!

But what is the deffinition of a canoeist then?

Someone tell her. PLEASE ::)
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Bar Wench on March 13, 2008, 01:56:56 PM
Feck off!

Yes Maam .... staright away maam. Sorry maam








PS Having a telly in your case Nick could make you either a box or a remote control.

Our telly is in a box at present cussing:

And The Boy sneaked down to my office and was on the internet from 10 last night until 3.30 this morning!! I had unplugged the machine and hidden the cable. He found another and re plumbed it!¬ Banghead Banghead

Can't you just turn the power off to that phase of the house?
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Snoopy on March 13, 2008, 01:57:44 PM
One who canoes













And don't get stroppy just because you didn't know what an Onanist is.





PS Definition only has one F ..... I know you come from Surrey where they make love and break wind with two small fs but really. (Around Esher I gather they prefer Ph)
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Nick on March 13, 2008, 01:59:42 PM
Feck off!

Yes Maam .... staright away maam. Sorry maam








PS Having a telly in your case Nick could make you either a box or a remote control.

Our telly is in a box at present cussing:

And The Boy sneaked down to my office and was on the internet from 10 last night until 3.30 this morning!! I had unplugged the machine and hidden the cable. He found another and re plumbed it!¬ Banghead Banghead

Can't you just turn the power off to that phase of the house?

Not without worrying the smoke alarms. I am more inclined to wire up the keyboard!
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Bar Wench on March 13, 2008, 02:00:05 PM
But if a canoeist is simple one who canoes then surely an individual who has canoed in the past is a canoeist.  rubschin:

Onanist?

One who ummmm interupts.  redface:
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Nick on March 13, 2008, 02:03:43 PM
I once went to a discotheque. That does not make me a dancer!
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Bar Wench on March 13, 2008, 02:05:19 PM
I once went to a discotheque. That does not make me a dancer!

 point:

I bet!

 point:

Sorry can no longer continue this conversation. Am  happy001 at the mental image of Nick spasmodically jerking around a darkened dance floor under a mirror ball to Footloose.  happy001
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Nick on March 13, 2008, 02:06:12 PM
I won a competition once. Mind you I was only 17. And it was a crap prize evil:
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Bar Wench on March 13, 2008, 02:07:11 PM
For the most spasms possible to Dancing Queen?

 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Nick on March 13, 2008, 02:09:08 PM
I won a copy of Roxy Music's Virginia Plain if  you must know evil:

I still have it somewhere.
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Bar Wench on March 13, 2008, 02:09:37 PM
Do you throw anything away?  eeek:
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Snoopy on March 13, 2008, 02:09:49 PM
Onanist = One who masturbates ...... My suggestion was that the media are using canoeist to call him a wanker ~ which he clearly is.





Funnier if it doesn't have to be explained.
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Nick on March 13, 2008, 02:10:16 PM
Subtle but possible!
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Bar Wench on March 13, 2008, 02:13:58 PM
Onanist = One who masturbates ...... My suggestion was that the media are using canoeist to call him a wanker ~ which he clearly is.





Funnier if it doesn't have to be explained.

Ahhh I didn't get it. ::)
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Nick on March 13, 2008, 02:14:49 PM
I blame the comprehensive system noooo:
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Darwins Selection on March 13, 2008, 02:38:46 PM
I blame the comprehensive system noooo:

No, I am sure they also taught Onanism at public school.
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Grumpmeister on March 13, 2008, 02:42:27 PM
And The Boy sneaked down to my office and was on the internet from 10 last night until 3.30 this morning!! I had unplugged the machine and hidden the cable. He found another and re plumbed it!¬ Banghead Banghead

Nick, switch your computer on and when it gives you the option to enter the BIOS settings do it. You can set a bios password (just make sure you dont forget it) that would stop the boy being able to get into windows never mind the internet.
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: The Moan Ranger on March 13, 2008, 02:46:59 PM
I blame the comprehensive system noooo:

No, I am sure they also taught Onanism at public school.


But not at Grammar school like wot I went to. Obviously.
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Darwins Selection on March 13, 2008, 02:48:10 PM
I blame the comprehensive system noooo:

No, I am sure they also taught Onanism at public school.


But not at Grammar school like wot I went to. Obviously.

QED
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Snoopy on March 13, 2008, 05:02:38 PM
Good Grief!
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: grumpyoldsoldier on March 13, 2008, 09:14:40 PM
But if a canoeist is simple one who canoes then surely an individual who has canoed in the past is a canoeist.  rubschin:

Onanist?

One who ummmm interupts.  redface:
I aint got a clue either, is he related to Conanist The Destroyer?
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Darwins Selection on March 14, 2008, 09:01:50 AM
But if a canoeist is simple one who canoes then surely an individual who has canoed in the past is a canoeist.  rubschin:

Onanist?

One who ummmm interupts.  redface:
I aint got a clue either, is he related to Conanist The Destroyer?


[fact] A college chum of mine had a parrot called Onan because it was forever spilling its seed on the floor.[/fact]
Title: Re: WHY
Post by: Barman on March 14, 2008, 09:31:57 AM
But if a canoeist is simple one who canoes then surely an individual who has canoed in the past is a canoeist.  rubschin:

Onanist?

One who ummmm interupts.  redface:
I aint got a clue either, is he related to Conanist The Destroyer?


[fact] A college chum of mine had a parrot called Onan because it was forever spilling its seed on the floor.[/fact]
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