The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Mr Happy on May 21, 2007, 10:03:22 PM

Title: Newbie
Post by: Mr Happy on May 21, 2007, 10:03:22 PM
I don't want to be a newbie, don't fancy a wedgie or dishing out my dinner money to Mal er whoops Snoopy.

Do i have to keep posting to get my status up, it'll hurt you more than me.   Can I bribe a mod to be classified as something else 'chief miserable bar steward' for example.   Ohh have we got one of them, i might re-register.   Sod it, any cleaning jobs going, i can speak Polish, tsssssssssss.
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Uncle Mort on May 21, 2007, 10:28:51 PM
10 posts and your emoticons work. Meanwhile I think a potboy is needed.  eeek:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Mr Happy on May 21, 2007, 10:36:22 PM
Quote from: Uncle Mort link=topic=316. msg3970#msg3970 date=1179786531
10 posts and your emoticons work.  Meanwhile I think a potboy is needed.   eeek:

Are you calling me

(http://hxxp: futility. typepad. com/futility/images/pete_doherty. jpg)

Bloody hell can't i post a piccie either?
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Uncle Mort on May 21, 2007, 10:39:12 PM
I don't know about pictures ~ probably the magic 10 posts. Anyway collect the empties I think I heard time being called.
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Mr Happy on May 21, 2007, 10:41:26 PM
Quote from: Uncle Mort link=topic=316. msg3972#msg3972 date=1179787152
I don't know about pictures ~ probably the magic 10 posts.  Anyway collect the empties I think I heard time being called.

Yessir, sorrysir, finished your Baileys.

I aint working karioke night!
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Uncle Mort on May 21, 2007, 10:45:30 PM
Quote from: Uncle Mort link=topic=316. msg3972#msg3972 date=1179787152
I don't know about pictures ~ probably the magic 10 posts.  Anyway collect the empties I think I heard time being called.

Yessir, sorrysir, finished your Baileys.

I aint working karioke night!
   

Very good.  ;D
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Pastis on May 21, 2007, 10:54:59 PM
'Evening Mr Happy... it's gone wine o'clock and well past my bed time eyes:

Enjoy the facilities... everyboy else has lol:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Mr Happy on May 21, 2007, 10:57:31 PM
'Evening Mr Happy... it's gone wine o'clock and well past my bed time eyes:

Enjoy the facilities... everyboy else has lol:

Cheers!  17 hours to beer o'clock, unfortunately 9 hours til  Banghead
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Barman on May 22, 2007, 06:20:46 AM
I don't want to be a newbie, don't fancy a wedgie or dishing out my dinner money to Mal er whoops Snoopy.

Do i have to keep posting to get my status up, it'll hurt you more than me.   Can I bribe a mod to be classified as something else 'chief miserable bar steward' for example.   Ohh have we got one of them, i might re-register.   Sod it, any cleaning jobs going, i can speak Polish, tsssssssssss.
You remain a newbie ?til 50 posts ? until that time expect to have your head pushed down the toilet and flushed.  point:

Mind you, looking at your head we should really have the plumber standing by for such occasions.  rubschin:

I actually wanted to change the newbie thing but Bouncer wouldn?t let me.  noooo:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Bar Wench on May 22, 2007, 08:00:07 AM
 sex014 Bouncer is more scarey than  spider:

Why did you remove my standard no sexual whip?  Angry9:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Barman on May 22, 2007, 08:07:24 AM
sex014 Bouncer is more scarey than  spider:

Why did you remove my standard no sexual whip?  Angry9:
This one?  whip:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Mr Happy on May 22, 2007, 10:18:30 AM
I can get in from work  lol: lol: lol:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Nick on May 22, 2007, 10:22:17 AM
You have a PM
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Barman on May 22, 2007, 10:22:26 AM
I can get in from work  lol: lol: lol:
Yay!  cloud9:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Barman on May 22, 2007, 10:22:55 AM
You have a PM
No I don't!  noooo:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Nick on May 22, 2007, 10:25:51 AM
 Banghead
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Grumpmeister on May 22, 2007, 10:28:49 AM
Quote from: Uncle Mort link=topic=316. msg3972#msg3972 date=1179787152
I don't know about pictures ~ probably the magic 10 posts.  Anyway collect the empties I think I heard time being called.

Yessir, sorrysir, finished your Baileys.

I aint working karioke night!

You are safe, karioke night has been stopped after last time. Berek and Nick did a duet and we ended up getting raided by the RSPCA. eveilgrin:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Berek on May 22, 2007, 11:36:13 AM
Quote from: Uncle Mort link=topic=316. msg3972#msg3972 date=1179787152
I don't know about pictures ~ probably the magic 10 posts.  Anyway collect the empties I think I heard time being called.

Yessir, sorrysir, finished your Baileys.

I aint working karioke night!

You are safe, karioke night has been stopped after last time. Berek and Nick did a duet and we ended up getting raided by the RSPCA. eveilgrin:


it was going quite well until he got his knob out
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Darwins Selection on May 22, 2007, 11:38:20 AM
Quote from: Uncle Mort link=topic=316. msg3972#msg3972 date=1179787152
I don't know about pictures ~ probably the magic 10 posts.  Anyway collect the empties I think I heard time being called.
Yessir, sorrysir, finished your Baileys.
I aint working karioke night!
You are safe, karioke night has been stopped after last time. Berek and Nick did a duet and we ended up getting raided by the RSPCA. eveilgrin:


Which reminds me.

Did anyone explain to Mr Happy that the "Go Down" button doesn't work?
it was going quite well until he got his knob out
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Barman on May 22, 2007, 12:12:18 PM
Quote from: Uncle Mort link=topic=316. msg3972#msg3972 date=1179787152
I don't know about pictures ~ probably the magic 10 posts.  Anyway collect the empties I think I heard time being called.
Yessir, sorrysir, finished your Baileys.
I aint working karioke night!
You are safe, karioke night has been stopped after last time. Berek and Nick did a duet and we ended up getting raided by the RSPCA. eveilgrin:


Which reminds me.

Did anyone explain to Mr Happy that the "Go Down" button doesn't work?
it was going quite well until he got his knob out
Or the quote button by the looks of things!  point:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Bar Wench on May 22, 2007, 12:12:36 PM
Quote from: Uncle Mort link=topic=316. msg3972#msg3972 date=1179787152
I don't know about pictures ~ probably the magic 10 posts.  Anyway collect the empties I think I heard time being called.

Yessir, sorrysir, finished your Baileys.

I aint working karioke night!

You are safe, karioke night has been stopped after last time. Berek and Nick did a duet and we ended up getting raided by the RSPCA. eveilgrin:


it was going quite well until he got his knob out

Why does the evening always have to end on a bum note with someone getting their knob out. Wouldn't it just be much nicer if we could all lock up and go home without anyone having shown a bodily part.
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Nick on May 22, 2007, 12:16:59 PM
Quote
a bum note


Wrong side!
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Bar Wench on May 22, 2007, 12:25:50 PM
So that's where I have been going wrong!  redface:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Snoopy on May 22, 2007, 12:28:00 PM
So that's where I have been going wrong!  redface:

You know what they say Wench ....... If sex is a pain in the bum ~ you're doing something wrong
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Berek on May 22, 2007, 12:32:46 PM
So that's where I have been going wrong!  redface:

You know what they say Wench ....... If sex is a pain in the bum ~ you're doing something wrong

better grease up.. eyes:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Darwins Selection on May 22, 2007, 01:20:57 PM
Quote from: Uncle Mort link=topic=316. msg3972#msg3972 date=1179787152
I don't know about pictures ~ probably the magic 10 posts.  Anyway collect the empties I think I heard time being called.
Yessir, sorrysir, finished your Baileys.
I aint working karioke night!
You are safe, karioke night has been stopped after last time. Berek and Nick did a duet and we ended up getting raided by the RSPCA. eveilgrin:

Which reminds me.

Did anyone explain to Mr Happy that the "Go Down" button doesn't work?
it was going quite well until he got his knob out
Or the quote button by the looks of things!  point:
[/quote]

The small writing on this board is no joke with bi-focals you know. redface:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Bar Wench on May 22, 2007, 01:23:45 PM
Maybe you need to up them to tri-focals?
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Nick on May 22, 2007, 01:30:43 PM
I have some quadrifocals drumroll:

Waits for Berek to make cock waving accusation. I use them for looking up, down, left, right and forward. Special James Bond style tiny wing mirrors alert me to the approach of muggers when in Ellesmere Port.
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Bar Wench on May 22, 2007, 01:32:19 PM
There is quite a lot of cock waving in the desk thread too. Bouncer has three don't you know!  ::)
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Nick on May 22, 2007, 01:35:07 PM
 sad24:

My office only has two. One covered in heaps of paper and the other (looks round) also covered in heaps of paper and broken television cry:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Bar Wench on May 22, 2007, 01:36:43 PM
Broken television?
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Nick on May 22, 2007, 01:37:07 PM
SWMBO won't throw things away sad24:

We actually have three broken TVs in the house. eeek:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Misunderstood on May 22, 2007, 01:37:56 PM
There is quite a lot of cock waving in the desk thread too. Bouncer has three don't you know!  ::)

What? 
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Bar Wench on May 22, 2007, 01:40:54 PM
You know what I'm talking about! Waving about desk size, number of gadgets, number of printers.  ::)
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Nick on May 22, 2007, 01:42:03 PM
Apart from broken TVs I only need one of most things. I think. Not fingers obviously, or eyes. Oh forget it!
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Bar Wench on May 22, 2007, 01:42:32 PM
I can't think of anything I only need one of.  eeek:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Barman on May 22, 2007, 01:43:29 PM
I can't think of anything I only need one of.  eeek:
eeek:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Bar Wench on May 22, 2007, 01:45:09 PM
Well, besides you. I need you like a need a hole in the head. I could do with none of you!  sad24:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Misunderstood on May 22, 2007, 01:46:59 PM
You know what I'm talking about! Waving about desk size, number of gadgets, number of printers.  ::)

Aw, cm'on, I was only sayin'   eeek:   And I never even mentioned all the boxes of cables out in the garage.

Or the Tank!
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Nick on May 22, 2007, 01:47:11 PM
I can't think of anything I only need one of.  eeek:

 eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Barman on May 22, 2007, 01:49:21 PM
Well, besides you. I need you like a need a hole in the head. I could do with none of you!  sad24:
sad32:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Grumpmeister on May 22, 2007, 01:52:37 PM
Well, besides you. I need you like a need a hole in the head. I could do with none of you!  sad24:



sad24: sad24: sad24: sad24: sad24: sad24: sad24: sad24: sad24: sad24: sad24: sad24:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Bar Wench on May 22, 2007, 01:54:35 PM
Oh dear, I seem to have upset everyone.  point: Cry baby woosies!
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Grumpmeister on May 22, 2007, 01:56:46 PM
First she calls me a geek, now she calls me a wuss.

Thats it.......SMITAGE  whip:

Barman, whats that 2 smites in an hour trick old boy?  eveilgrin:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Nick on May 22, 2007, 01:57:43 PM
Well I just smote both of you successfully drumroll:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Barman on May 22, 2007, 01:58:10 PM
First she calls me a geek, now she calls me a wuss.

Thats it.......SMITAGE  whip:

Barman, whats that 2 smites in an hour trick old boy?  eveilgrin:
Oh not a trick really - but I do know why it happens...  whistle:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Grumpmeister on May 22, 2007, 01:58:33 PM
Thats for smiting me then Nick  whistle:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Grumpmeister on May 22, 2007, 01:59:41 PM
Ok oh all knowing barkeep, why does it happen then?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Bar Wench on May 22, 2007, 02:02:14 PM
You deserved it! Go on look in your shirt pocket, there is a pen there isn't there!  point:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Grumpmeister on May 22, 2007, 02:04:37 PM
Of course I dont have a pen in there, I use it for my PDA, dont need a pen  noooo:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Barman on May 22, 2007, 02:05:11 PM
Ok oh all knowing barkeep, why does it happen then?  rubschin:
Okay? you know you can only smite one person per hour?  whistle:

Well, if somebody was on say zero and you smiteth them they go to -1 (obviously).

But if for some reason you then applaud them they don?t go back to zero ? oh no ? it takes off the smite you gave them within the last hour then adds on the applause so it jumps from -1 to +1

See?  cloud9:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Nick on May 22, 2007, 02:06:17 PM
 surrender:
Title: Re: Newbie
Post by: Grumpmeister on May 22, 2007, 02:08:57 PM
So it does, I've just bumped Nick up from 0 to 2. Does that little trick work in reverse as well by any chance  eyes: