The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Nick on March 31, 2008, 01:59:45 PM

Title: Norman calls
Post by: Nick on March 31, 2008, 01:59:45 PM
Your car is ready sir, after its service, when you wish to collect it.

There are a few extras.



Oh shit scared2: scared2: scared2: scared2: scared2:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Barman on March 31, 2008, 02:00:31 PM
Extras?
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Snoopy on March 31, 2008, 02:02:32 PM
Your car is ready sir, after its service, when you wish to collect it.

There are a few extras.



Oh shit scared2: scared2: scared2: scared2: scared2:


Prolly silly little things like new wipers, oil change, new oil filter, brake pads, four new tyres ... minor things like that.
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Barman on March 31, 2008, 02:03:12 PM
Your car is ready sir, after its service, when you wish to collect it.

There are a few extras.



Oh shit scared2: scared2: scared2: scared2: scared2:


Prolly silly little things like new wipers, oil change, new oil filter, brake pads, four new tyres ... minor things like that.
new front wing, new rear wing, bumper, windscreen, etc.  whistle:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Grumpmeister on March 31, 2008, 02:04:22 PM
This is Captain Calamity we are talking about here Snoop, more likeky a reinforced roll cage, lexan windscreen, armour platng and run flat tires  whistle:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Snoopy on March 31, 2008, 02:05:14 PM
Exhaust, indicator bulbs, back axle, drive shaft .... they can always find something to add £100 to your bill no matter what the car went in for.
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Snoopy on March 31, 2008, 02:05:56 PM
This is Captain Calamity we are talking about here Snoop, more likeky a reinforced roll cage, lexan windscreen, armour platng and run flat tires  whistle:

Nah ~ I've seen his car. Only lacks a man with a red flag. ::)
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Barman on March 31, 2008, 02:09:33 PM
Exhaust, indicator bulbs, back axle, drive shaft .... they can always find something to add £100 to your bill no matter what the car went in for.
It is the oil that gets me!  Banghead
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Snoopy on March 31, 2008, 02:12:31 PM
'cactly.
My car is a fully serviced deal, fixed monthly rate and they do everything and I get a new one every three years. Mrs S however has her own Corsa and that costs £100 every time it goes into the service bay. Never more, never less. I think it must be the only number the mechanic can write on the bill.
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Grumpmeister on March 31, 2008, 02:13:15 PM
This is Captain Calamity we are talking about here Snoop, more likeky a reinforced roll cage, lexan windscreen, armour platng and run flat tires  whistle:

Nah ~ I've seen his car. Only lacks a man with a red flag. ::)

That isnt surprising Snoop, would you want to stand in front of Nick when he's at the wheel?  scared2:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Snoopy on March 31, 2008, 02:14:07 PM
No ... I stood behind the closed gate to wave goodbye.
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Nick on March 31, 2008, 02:20:55 PM
It was that pothole what did the damage.

 evil:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Barman on March 31, 2008, 02:21:29 PM
It was that pothole what did the damage.

 evil:
And the dustcart of course...  whistle:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Nick on March 31, 2008, 02:22:37 PM
That was Mrs Nick's car.

Mine was the pothole. Those alloy wheels cost a packet!

Ask Growler.
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Barman on March 31, 2008, 02:23:25 PM
That was Mrs Nick's car.

Mine was the pothole. Those alloy wheels cost a packet!

Ask Growler.
Can't Growler 'acquire' some for you?  whistle:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Snoopy on March 31, 2008, 02:23:51 PM
That was Mrs Nick's car.

Mine was the pothole. Those alloy wheels cost a packet!

Ask Growler.

Send the bill to the council.
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Nick on March 31, 2008, 02:24:02 PM
Tsk!
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Nick on March 31, 2008, 02:24:26 PM
I imagine Growler knows Norman Hand!
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: The Moan Ranger on March 31, 2008, 02:28:39 PM
Exhaust, indicator bulbs, back axle, drive shaft .... they can always find something to add £100 to your bill no matter what the car went in for.

Not all garages are like that - I had two new ball joints (no smutty jokes please) and they cost £100 without fitting, a full service, MOT and two new tyres. Total bill £420.

The blank comment was due to my system still being extremely slow - I think it got itself into a bit of a flap!
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Snoopy on March 31, 2008, 02:30:21 PM
Exhaust, indicator bulbs, back axle, drive shaft .... they can always find something to add £100 to your bill no matter what the car went in for.

Is that it? Speechless?
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Barman on March 31, 2008, 02:31:01 PM
Exhaust, indicator bulbs, back axle, drive shaft .... they can always find something to add £100 to your bill no matter what the car went in for.

Is that it? Speechless?
No... this is speechless...

"                                                                                           "
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: The Moan Ranger on March 31, 2008, 02:47:25 PM
Fixed - apologies!
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Snoopy on March 31, 2008, 02:48:43 PM
'sall right matey ....   lol:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Grumpmeister on March 31, 2008, 04:20:50 PM
That was Mrs Nick's car.

Mine was the pothole. Those alloy wheels cost a packet!

Ask Growler.

Send the bill to the council.

On the other hand check the council car parks to see if any of their cars have alloy wheels and then unleash the boy......  whistle:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Nick on April 01, 2008, 08:42:24 AM
It needs three new tyres.Fortunatley Norman's brother runs a tyre business ( rubschin:). I am booked in for 10, but The Boy hasn't woken up yet! evil:

Correction: he has woken up and accidentally tipped the contents of an entire box of Cheerios onto the kitchen floor! evil:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Bar Wench on April 01, 2008, 09:03:52 AM
Why didn't you wake him up earlier?!?
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Darwins Selection on April 01, 2008, 10:23:25 AM
Why didn't you wake him up earlier?!?
Hadn't got the cheerios.
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Nick on April 01, 2008, 10:26:34 AM
Why didn't you wake him up earlier?!?

Why should I, it is peaceful when he is asleep evil:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Barman on April 01, 2008, 10:33:17 AM
It needs three new tyres.Fortunatley Norman's brother runs a tyre business ( rubschin:). I am booked in for 10, but The Boy hasn't woken up yet! evil:

Correction: he has woken up and accidentally tipped the contents of an entire box of Cheerios onto the kitchen floor! evil:
If you need three why are you having ten?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Snoopy on April 01, 2008, 10:45:38 AM
It needs three new tyres.Fortunatley Norman's brother runs a tyre business ( rubschin:). I am booked in for 10, but The Boy hasn't woken up yet! evil:

Correction: he has woken up and accidentally tipped the contents of an entire box of Cheerios onto the kitchen floor! evil:
If you need three why are you having ten?  rubschin:

And you wonder why your torture never ends  ::)
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Bar Wench on April 01, 2008, 10:46:15 AM
Why didn't you wake him up earlier?!?
Hadn't got the cheerios.

They are donut seeds you know.
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Snoopy on April 01, 2008, 10:48:29 AM
Ahem!
I thought you said you are not blonde?
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Bar Wench on April 01, 2008, 10:49:05 AM
 ::)
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Nick on April 01, 2008, 10:52:20 AM
It needs three new tyres.Fortunatley Norman's brother runs a tyre business ( rubschin:). I am booked in for 10, but The Boy hasn't woken up yet! evil:

Correction: he has woken up and accidentally tipped the contents of an entire box of Cheerios onto the kitchen floor! evil:
If you need three why are you having ten?  rubschin:

It only needed two in the end.£110  Banghead Banghead
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Snoopy on April 01, 2008, 10:53:46 AM
Why didn't you wake him up earlier?!?
Hadn't got the cheerios.

They are donut seeds you know.

http://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/index.php?topic=3268.msg65024#msg65024
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Bar Wench on April 01, 2008, 10:58:46 AM
Why didn't you wake him up earlier?!?
Hadn't got the cheerios.

They are donut seeds you know.

http://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/index.php?topic=3268.msg65024#msg65024

Yes dear that is where I got it from.  ::)
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Snoopy on April 01, 2008, 11:02:37 AM
 evil: ©
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Darwins Selection on April 01, 2008, 11:08:43 AM
Why didn't you wake him up earlier?!?
Hadn't got the cheerios.
They are donut seeds you know.
Do they prefer shade and acid soil?
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Barman on April 01, 2008, 11:09:10 AM
It needs three new tyres.Fortunatley Norman's brother runs a tyre business ( rubschin:). I am booked in for 10, but The Boy hasn't woken up yet! evil:

Correction: he has woken up and accidentally tipped the contents of an entire box of Cheerios onto the kitchen floor! evil:
If you need three why are you having ten?  rubschin:

And you wonder why your torture never ends  ::)
confused2:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: The Moan Ranger on April 01, 2008, 11:21:32 AM
It needs three new tyres.Fortunatley Norman's brother runs a tyre business ( rubschin:). I am booked in for 10, but The Boy hasn't woken up yet! evil:

Correction: he has woken up and accidentally tipped the contents of an entire box of Cheerios onto the kitchen floor! evil:
If you need three why are you having ten?  rubschin:

It only needed two in the end.£110  Banghead Banghead

Sounds pricey. What size are they?  I got two 225/55V16s for £80, balanced, fitted and with the tracking done  whistle:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Nick on April 01, 2008, 11:22:56 AM
Bastardo!
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Barman on April 01, 2008, 11:31:07 AM
Bastardo!
Bastardo eh? That new Italian make…  noooo:

Should’ve stuck to Dunlop or something simple…  whistle:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Nick on April 01, 2008, 11:31:54 AM
 Banghead Banghead Banghead Banghead cussing:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: The Moan Ranger on April 01, 2008, 11:32:09 AM
Bastardo!

Now, now Nicholas!  ;D
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Nick on April 01, 2008, 11:33:06 AM
Only women ever call me that, and only when I am in trouble.

Why do they do that, eh?
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: The Moan Ranger on April 01, 2008, 11:38:02 AM
Only women ever call me that, and only when I am in trouble.

Why do they do that, eh?

Your lucky, when I get in trouble I am called far, far worse  surrender:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Snoopy on April 01, 2008, 11:48:31 AM
Only women ever call me that, and only when I am in trouble.

Why do they do that, eh?

Funny that.... my mother and first wife only ever used my real name when I was in the sh*t.
Current wife never calls me anything else. Odd confused:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Nick on April 01, 2008, 11:50:48 AM
Presumably you are always in the shit nowadays then eveilgrin:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: GROWLER on April 01, 2008, 11:52:23 AM
That was Mrs Nick's car.

Mine was the pothole. Those alloy wheels cost a packet!

Ask Growler.
Can't Growler 'acquire' some for you?  whistle:

I'll need 4 bricks to do that. ;)
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Nick on April 01, 2008, 11:52:59 AM
Encyclopaedias you dolt.This is the Capital of CUlture year you know!
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: GROWLER on April 01, 2008, 11:57:29 AM
I imagine Growler knows Norman Hand!


Never 'eard of him. Who is he?
Not some gonk that was 'recommended' by one of you pissed up mates down the pub....and 'take cash only mind'...is it?
 ::)

Wish you'd ask me before plundering ahead with these grease monkeys that no one's ever heard of.
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Snoopy on April 01, 2008, 11:58:58 AM
Presumably you are always in the shit nowadays then eveilgrin:

 rubschin: Hadn't thought of that ..... thanks pal!
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: GROWLER on April 01, 2008, 11:59:51 AM
Encyclopaedias you dolt.This is the Capital of CUlture year you know!

What's one of them? confused:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: The Moan Ranger on April 01, 2008, 12:00:37 PM
Encyclopaedias you dolt.This is the Capital of Ordure year you know!

Corrected, for you.  whistle:
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: Nick on April 01, 2008, 12:15:43 PM
Encyclopaedias you dolt.This is the Capital of CUlture year you know!

What's one of them? confused:

Word of the week

http://wordnet.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=dolt (http://wordnet.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=dolt)
Title: Re: Norman calls
Post by: GROWLER on April 01, 2008, 01:42:28 PM
Encyclopaedias you dolt.This is the Capital of CUlture year you know!

What's one of them? confused:

Word of the week

http://wordnet.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=dolt (http://wordnet.princeton.edu/perl/webwn?s=dolt)

Interesting, but prefer most of these others tbqu:

stupid, stupid person, stupe, dullard, dolt, pudding head, pudden-head, poor fish, pillock, dick 'ed, knob 'ed, tosser, eejit, plank, vacumn 'ed (a person who is not very bright)

Anyway you dork. WHO TF IS NORMAN, for the second time of asking? ::)