The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Nick on July 05, 2008, 11:38:40 AM
-
Well if Berek comes here, of all places, to get chicken rearing advice ( noooo:) I can do this.
Work is quiet. Cash running low.
I was awake in the night (as always) actually wondering about performing a bank robbery. I had got halfway to working out the perfect plan then fell asleep.
So come on. Post your money making schemes and scams!
-
Well you could have a shower and try the Town Hall steps. Take vaseline eveilgrin:
-
That's the sort of thing.Paving stones, potholes, liquid on the floor in Tesco!
Pastis might benefit from this too
-
print up some Nelson Mandella t-shirts ready for when he drops dead
-
If it's quick readies you need you could do worse that taking a lot of tat to a car boot sale whistle:
For longer term Tesco are always looking for shelf fillers but get there before the 6th formers all flock in for their summer jobs. Security Companies are always looking for staff at this time of the year as holiday cover. Mostly night work ~ 12 hour shifts but it pays around £300 a week.
And Berek is not as silly as he pretends either.
-
print up some Nelson Mandella t-shirts ready for when he drops dead
lol:
-
Repossession/empty property management.
Get a deal with a big lender (who I work for) and then all you have to do is go in once the property is vacated, drain the water system down, splash a load of beige paint over the walls, tidy the garden and job done.
Oh - and get a locksmith to change all the locks.
You get about three grand per property.
-
rubschin:
-
Northern Ireland is a particular hotspot at the moment.
-
Now that sounds like a good way to make some money and get your legs broken at the same time.
-
That's what I thought. I have worked in Northern Ireland a few times. Very odd place
-
Having, in past recessions, been called upon by various lenders to "secure" premises from which debtors had been evicted I can assure you that some are more than capable of returning in the night with baseball bats, a gallon of unleaded and a box of matches. In N'orn Ireland they do that sort of thing for sport to people with whom they share an accent and upbringing. What they would do to an Englishman caught up in such circumstances does not require much imagination.
-
My company has repossessed over 100 over there recently without incident. Times have changed.
-
And are Englishmen running the security side of things by travelling over or is it a local "security outfit" (otherwise known by their initials)?
-
The company I set up will be called "Ultimate Vacation Force". Won't cause problems, will it?
-
lol: That's what I thought.
-
lol: That's what I thought.
-
Or possibly "Unoccupied Domicile Arrangements".
Better?
-
A provisional alternative could be Independent Repossession Associates
-
:-)
I don't know anyone from "that side" though!
-
Oh ~ Just stand there long enough, they'll introduce themselves I'm sure whistle:
-
I shall tip my bowler hat to them when they do.
-
Very wise 8)
-
That's the sort of thing.Paving stones, potholes, liquid on the floor in Tesco!
Pastis might benefit from this too
Spot on, Sir. Am reading this thread with avid interest...
-
Have you got a balaclava helmet?
-
eeek:
That's referring to above I assume confused:
-
Yup!
-
Good. Anyway I threw mine away years ago when I realised there was no way I'd be forking out that sort of money to slide down a mountain in sub zero temperatures surrender:
-
You'll have to make do with a stocking over your head then.
-
lol: Somehow I don't think I'd make a credible 'heavy'.
-
Oh well ~ Can you drive?
lol:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8g_GeQR8fJo
-
lol: lol: One of my favourite, iconic films. I'd be happy behind the wheel of a mini 8)
Who can we cast as Camp Freddy? ;)
-
lol: lol: One of my favourite, iconic films. I'd be happy behind the wheel of a mini 8)
Who can we cast as Camp Freddy? ;)
rubschin: Wonder ~ is BM busy? He does have a cat or two ......... but then again TG is at a loose end and could do with some cash.
-
rubschin:
Signing up now for The Virtual Job.
Introducing the plans for a new business venture. This is the self preservation society
-
happy088
-
An emergency stop might get me a whiplash injury if the person behind doesn't stop sharpish. Nice little earner.
-
I have just received an e mail inviting me to invest in a film!
Carnaby, named by Screen Finance magazine as one of the UK's most prolific film production companies, and the producers of the current nationwide release Rise of the Footsoldier, is pleased to present you with an investment offer. This is your chance to get involved in the British film industry.
Our next feature film, entitled Doghouse, is the original brainchild of leading British comic and film artist and writer Dan Schaffer.
An excellent UK-based production team is already in place including the award-winning director Jake West (Evil Aliens).
Looking to build upon the success of British comedy-horror genre films such as Shaun of the Dead and Jake West's own Evil Aliens, Carnaby's Doghouse follows the fortunes of a group of men who, struggling with their own mid-life troubles, go off for a relaxing "boys' weekend" in the country.
rubschin:
-
As someone who watches a wide and varied amount of crap I haven't heard of any of the films they have on their site.
-
SO is that a dis-recommendation then?
-
Not sure how sound an investment it is but perhaps some of us could do it for real.
Carnaby's Doghouse follows the fortunes of a group of men who, struggling with their own mid-life troubles, go off for a relaxing "boys' weekend" in the country.
What could possibly go wrong?
rubschin:
-
It is indeed. The stuff they are producing in unoriginal and IMHO looks lacklustre. The British film industry would do far better to not attempt to make knock offs of better films that have come out of America and Japan. Hot Fuzz, Shaun of the Dead, Kidulthood, Kinky Boots, Four Weddings etc all worked because they were original ideas that just happened to be British.
-
Not sure how sound an investment it is but perhaps some of us could do it for real.
Carnaby's Doghouse follows the fortunes of a group of men who, struggling with their own mid-life troubles, go off for a relaxing "boys' weekend" in the country.
What could possibly go wrong?
rubschin:
Which is in itself a rip off of a recent Waking the Dead episode.
-
Not sure how sound an investment it is but perhaps some of us could do it for real.
Carnaby's Doghouse follows the fortunes of a group of men who, struggling with their own mid-life troubles, go off for a relaxing "boys' weekend" in the country.
What could possibly go wrong?
rubschin:
A pub outing to the backwoods.
Excellent plan!
-
http://www.youtube.com/v/Qyfz2DFZ9OA&hl=en&fs=1
scared2:
-
I worry about Wenchy noooo:
-
Wenchy is getting weirder by the day.
-
Wenchy is getting weirder by the day.
Holiday approaches… It is prolly a reaction to the fake tan… noooo:
-
Pish tosh!
-
Do you really say things like that or is it just on here? rubschin:
-
I really say things like that. redface:
-
I see ~ thank you.
-
I really say things like that. redface:
Pish tosh? eeek:
Yumster... um, what else... we should have a little Wenchasaurus...
-
I don't sound like something out of Mallory Towers though! A more normal phrase would probably be pish tosh what a load of bollox.
-
I really say things like that. redface:
Pish tosh? eeek:
Yumster... um, what else... we should have a little Wenchasourus...
eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpbskids.org%2Fbarney%2Fimages%2Fdinosmanners.jpg&hash=2ea6db218b9424beae643e575b215678feb7daf6)
-
I really say things like that. redface:
Pish tosh? eeek:
Yumster... um, what else... we should have a little Wenchasourus...
eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpbskids.org%2Fbarney%2Fimages%2Fdinosmanners.jpg&hash=2ea6db218b9424beae643e575b215678feb7daf6)
doh:
-
Wot?
-
Wot?
Not that kind of saurus... noooo:
-
Oh! redface:
-
Oh! redface:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwhatevernext.jasperffordeffanclub.com%2Fgraphics%2FThesaurus-ad.jpg&hash=daf6d6a015a2522c0fab6326e75f56edee806952)
-
I really say things like that. redface:
Pish tosh? eeek:
Yumster... um, what else... we should have a little Wenchasourus...
eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpbskids.org%2Fbarney%2Fimages%2Fdinosmanners.jpg&hash=2ea6db218b9424beae643e575b215678feb7daf6)
"I love you, you love me, we're as happy as can be" whistle:
Banghead
-
I really say things like that. redface:
Pish tosh? eeek:
Yumster... um, what else... we should have a little Wenchasourus...
eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpbskids.org%2Fbarney%2Fimages%2Fdinosmanners.jpg&hash=2ea6db218b9424beae643e575b215678feb7daf6)
"I love you, you love me, we're as happy as can be" whistle:
Banghead
Happy to have been of service. whistle:
-
cussing:
-
cussing:
Maybe Wenchzilla is more appropriate right now. whistle: