The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => The Computer Room => Topic started by: Snoopy on November 21, 2008, 11:37:23 AM

Title: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Snoopy on November 21, 2008, 11:37:23 AM: Has just taken 40 minutes of scanning to tell me that there is nothing wrong with my system ~ I knew that but bloody Vi$ta insisted on running a scan all on its own. First time it has ever done that rubschin: Another unwanted update I suppose. And before anyone tells me to ~ I turned off "automatic updates" the day I got the machine. Banghead

Still now I can get on with some work I suppose. Whilst the "scanning" was going on it slowed things right down .... and yes it came with all the right bells and whistles, certificates of authenticity etc. I have not been invaded. The problem is that I make it ask if it can update but often the updates not actually tell you, in simple terms, exactly what they are doing ~ just "essential patch for security" or some such bollox.
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Barman on November 21, 2008, 12:49:33 PM: I've just wasted two hours at a customer site because their stupid XP system gas decided not to connect to the Interweb for some reason... it is now sitting next to me... noooo:
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Nick on November 21, 2008, 12:50:56 PM: What, the interweb? eeek:
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Barman on November 21, 2008, 12:56:28 PM: Quote from: Nick on November 21, 2008, 12:50:56 PM
What, the interweb? eeek:
Yes Nick... the Interweb... noooo:
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Nick on November 21, 2008, 12:56:54 PM: It must be huge
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Barman on November 21, 2008, 01:04:19 PM: Quote from: Nick on November 21, 2008, 12:56:54 PM
It must be huge

Not as large as you would think actually... whacky115
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Bar Wench on November 21, 2008, 01:16:48 PM: Is the interweb like the Tardis then? rubschin:
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Darwins Selection on November 21, 2008, 01:19:13 PM: Quote from: Barman on November 21, 2008, 12:49:33 PM
XP system gas

I thought Confusers were all electric?

Does it run on propane or butane?
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Barman on November 21, 2008, 01:20:49 PM: Quote from: Bar Wench on November 21, 2008, 01:16:48 PM
Is the interweb like the Tardis then? rubschin:
Yes Wenchy.... noooo:
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Bar Wench on November 21, 2008, 01:21:15 PM: Cool! So do you have to keep it in a special container?
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Barman on November 21, 2008, 01:21:39 PM: Quote from: Bar Wench on November 21, 2008, 01:21:15 PM
Cool! So do you have to keep it in a special container?
Yes Wenchy... noooo:
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Bar Wench on November 21, 2008, 01:22:40 PM: What sort?

Is it shinny?
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Nick on November 21, 2008, 01:22:55 PM: with lots of cables?
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Barman on November 21, 2008, 01:23:18 PM: Quote from: Bar Wench on November 21, 2008, 01:22:40 PM
What sort?

Is it shinny?
Yes Wenchy... a special shiny container for the Interweb... noooo:
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Nick on November 21, 2008, 01:23:47 PM: Does it hum?
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Bar Wench on November 21, 2008, 01:23:56 PM: Don't be silly! I meant the Interweb? Is it shinny? Or sparkly?

I always thought it was sort of purple with silvery bits.
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Darwins Selection on November 21, 2008, 01:26:48 PM: Quote from: Bar Wench on November 21, 2008, 01:23:56 PM
Don't be silly! I meant the Interweb? Is it shinny? Or sparkly?

I always thought it was sort of purple with silvery bits.

You are thinking of Dr Who's posing pouch.
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Bar Wench on November 21, 2008, 01:27:47 PM: Quote from: Nick on November 21, 2008, 01:23:47 PM
Does it hum?

I think it bleeps.
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Nick on November 21, 2008, 01:29:00 PM: I think it might hum and bleep
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Barman on November 21, 2008, 01:41:09 PM: Quote from: Nick on November 21, 2008, 01:23:47 PM
Does it hum?
It does have a bit of a smell... noooo:
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Nick on November 21, 2008, 01:49:54 PM: You should get Wenchy to give it a rub.
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Barman on November 21, 2008, 02:12:15 PM: Quote from: Nick on November 21, 2008, 01:49:54 PM
You should get Wenchy to give it a rub.
eeek:
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Pastis on November 21, 2008, 02:31:50 PM: Does it smell like the Ozone layer?
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Nick on November 21, 2008, 02:32:30 PM: Parozone layer after Wench gets her mop on it
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Pastis on November 21, 2008, 02:52:08 PM: drumroll:
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Bar Wench on November 21, 2008, 03:30:33 PM: It smells of caramel.
Title: Re: Fvcking Microsoft
Post by: Nick on November 21, 2008, 05:34:54 PM: No. YOU smell of caramel.I smell of wet labrador. The intermong smells of metal