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Come Inside... => The Comedy Room => Topic started by: Just One More on November 30, 2008, 10:22:22 AM

Title: Scottish Logic
Post by: Just One More on November 30, 2008, 10:22:22 AM
A man in Scotland calls his son in London the day before Christmas Eve and says, 'I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that yourmother and I are divorcing; forty-seven years of misery is enough.'

'Dad, what are you talking about?' the son screams.
We can't stand the sight of each other any longer,' the father says.
'We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Leeds and tell her.'

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. 'Like hell they're getting divorced,' she shouts, 'I'll take care of this,'
She calls Scotland immediately, and screams at her father, 'You are NOT getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?' and hangs up.

The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. 'Okay,' he says, 'they're coming for Christmas and they're paying their own way.'
 
Title: Re: Scottish Logic
Post by: Pastis on December 01, 2008, 03:09:15 PM
 lol: lol:  I have just the friend to tell that to... a Glaswegian  ;)
Title: Re: Scottish Logic
Post by: Bar Wench on December 01, 2008, 03:58:35 PM
I sent it to Mother Wench. She offered to pay for my flight home. I now feel guilty.  redface:
Title: Re: Scottish Logic
Post by: Snoopy on December 01, 2008, 04:34:27 PM
I sent it to Mother Wench. She offered to pay for my flight home. I now feel guilty.  redface:

Never learn do you?  ::)
Title: Re: Scottish Logic
Post by: Darwins Selection on December 01, 2008, 06:11:27 PM
I sent it to Mother Wench. She offered to pay for my flight home. I now feel guilty.  redface:

The guilt will fade. . .

Buy her a trinket and give an above average hug when you see her, old ladies always fall for that.
Title: Re: Scottish Logic
Post by: Bar Wench on December 01, 2008, 06:25:45 PM
She has a Christmas box of goodies that will be leaving my office next week.  cloud9:

Brother Wench has bought her ....... a foot spa.  ::)
Title: Re: Scottish Logic
Post by: Darwins Selection on December 01, 2008, 06:32:43 PM
She has a Christmas box of goodies that will be leaving my office next week.  cloud9:

Brother Wench has bought her ....... a foot spa.  ::)

I expect she has always wanted one.  ::)
Title: Re: Scottish Logic
Post by: Nick on December 01, 2008, 06:39:44 PM
Assuming she has smelly feet  angel1
Title: Re: Scottish Logic
Post by: Snoopy on December 01, 2008, 08:22:59 PM
When they fitted my first ICD they gave me a long list of things I was to avoid as they would cause problems. I was to avoid Nuclear reactors, Arc welding, Strong Magnetic fields (metal detectors and security screening devices) and Footspas

I am still seeking an explanation for the last item   rubschin: