The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Nick on December 10, 2008, 10:12:54 AM
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Growler and I are troubled. We tend to thnk gadgets, but we have to get inside the female mindset. Impossible. If in doubt, I go for smelly things (usally the wrong smell) supplemented by a scarf or something safe like that (minefield nonetheless). I don't give a shite what I get for Christmas. If I want summat I can but it myself. And I only want books, or preferably a book token. This means I can slope off alone to Borders on Boxing Day to choose things
But wimmin noooo:
PRACTICAL ideas for wimmin type pressies please (gerls only or men who understand wimmin - don't rush)
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Growler and I are troubled. We tend to thnk gadgets, but we have to get inside the female mindset. Impossible. If in doubt, I go for smelly things (usally the wrong smell) supplemented by a scarf or something safe like that (minefield nonetheless). I don't give a shite what I get for Christmas. If I want summat I can but it myself. And I only want books, or preferably a book token. This means I can slope off alone to Borders on Boxing Day to choose things
But wimmin noooo:
PRACTICAL ideas for wimmin type pressies please (gerls only or men who understand wimmin - don't rush)
No problem there then. ::)
As discussed in private with Nick. I'm bloody clueless.
Iron? Hoover? Broomstick?
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You could buy Mrs G some socks!
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Every year this happens and every year you all fail. It isn't that difficult, hints will have been dropped you are all just shite at picking them up. Trying paying a bit more attention at this time of year when they whitter on and you would know!
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You could buy Mrs G some socks!
Why? confused:
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Mrs Nick witters all the time. I switch off
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And that is why you have no clue what to get her. noooo:
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You could buy Mrs G some socks!
Why? confused:
What then. You come up with an idea. Huge Pants?
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Every year this happens and every year you all fail. It isn't that difficult, hints will have been dropped you are all just shite at picking them up. Trying paying a bit more attention at this time of year when they whitter on and you would know!
Selective hearing deficit. Auto switch off when she speaks.
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SNAP
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You can never go wrong with a leather handbag. Before you wrap it stuff a couple of twenty pound notes in it (bad luck to give a bag or purse without cash in it ~ good luck to put cash in as it means the purse will never be empty)
No woman I have ever known has ever admitted to having too many "quality" handbags. OK ~ with the notes you are looking at spending twixt £100 and £150 to get something with a designer label, less if you shop in somewhere like Debenhams or a local luggage specialists. Remember it has to be leather, don't be tempted toward plastic ~ but think of the brownie points eyes:
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You could buy Mrs G some socks!
Why? confused:
What then. You come up with an idea. Huge Pants?
S'pose they'd fit her huge arse, yes! lol:
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Mrs Nick has 493 handbags already. Are you suggesting i buy No. 494? Are you mad?
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Oh shit!
Mrs Growler was standing behind me reading all this thread without my knowledge.
She says she not speaking to me now.
Every cloud ey, every cloud! cloud9:
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Follow Mrs Nick round duty free and see what she ohhs and ahhs at. That should be easy enough.
Mrs Growler would be happy with a certificate promising her x amount of days of peace and quiet with Growler behaving himself.
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You all have kids and everyone knows that the one thing parents really want is time without them. So why not buy them a spa day/weekend gift thing with the promise to take the kids off their hands for the day/weekend?
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Mrs Growler would be happy with a certificate promising her x amount of days of peace and quiet with Growler behaving himself.
I'd have to vacate the premises for that to take effect. ::)
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Oh shit!
Mrs Growler was standing behind me reading all this thread without my knowledge.
She says she not speaking to me now.
Every cloud ey, every cloud! cloud9:
point: point: point: point: point: point: point: point:
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Follow Mrs Nick round duty free and see what she ohhs and ahhs at. That should be easy enough.
Mrs Growler would be happy with a certificate promising her x amount of days of peace and quiet with Growler behaving himself.
That is the first sensible thing you have said in months!
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You all have kids and everyone knows that the one thing parents really want is time without them. So why not buy them a spa day/weekend gift thing with the promise to take the kids off their hands for the day/weekend?
Done that. Disaster. Don't ask. It involved wax though noooo:
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Mrs Growler would be happy with a certificate promising her x amount of days of peace and quiet with Growler behaving himself.
I'd have to vacate the premises for that to take effect. ::)
See it is impossible which is why the gift would be so greatly appreciated. I often think the best gifts are not about the money spent but the thought behind it which is why "experience/red letter day" gifts are so popular. Think along those lines but something for home and you are on to a winner. For instance, this year Mr Wench is getting 20 cup of tea in bed vouchers.
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You all have kids and everyone knows that the one thing parents really want is time without them. So why not buy them a spa day/weekend gift thing with the promise to take the kids off their hands for the day/weekend?
Done that. Disaster. Don't ask. It involved wax though noooo:
Well perhaps a massage or something not involving intense amounts of pain.
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Growler. I bought Mrs Nick a voucher for this mob. A thought (no wax though noooo:)
http://www.macdonaldhotels.co.uk/healthbeauty/giftvouchers.htm (http://www.macdonaldhotels.co.uk/healthbeauty/giftvouchers.htm)
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SWMBO is receiving three cardigans (as she has indicated she is "short of them") An ornament (tradition as she collects a certain "brand" ~ Wenchy may PM for details), a new 5 year diary as she has maintained a diary for the past 15 years, writes in it everynight, the current one is about to run out and a bottle of Chanel No5. She may also get another handbag. NEVER shoes ~ I buy those all year round for her on the principle her predecessor instilled in me "If you don't shoe the horse you can't ride it".
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There you go! A man who listens and pays attention!
Please pm details of ornament!
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Mrs Growler would be happy with a certificate promising her x amount of days of peace and quiet with Growler behaving himself.
I'd have to vacate the premises for that to take effect. ::)
I often think the best gifts are not about the money spent but the thought behind it which is why "experience/red letter day" gifts are so popular.
Did that last year for her birthday. Don't think she was overly impressed tbh. ::)
What's wrong with operating and driving a fire engine ffs?
I thought it was absolutely fantastic, and so did Growlers jnr.
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Poor Mrs Growler. noooo:
What does she do for fun? Does she have a hobby? When she has free time what does she choose to do with it?
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Poor Mrs Growler. noooo:
When she has free time what does she choose to do with it?
Make me tea, and wash me gruns of course!! lol:
New cooker and washing machine then. Sorted! cloud9:
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noooo:
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She also sticks needles in him. Professionaly. like point:
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I'm also a big believer that mp3 players with attachements for listening to them in the car are a good gift. They aren't only for music, you can download podcasts, audio books, radio shows etc. All good things for the woman on the go.
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All good things for the woman on the go. eyes:
I have won 2 MP3 player of late. One with a lucky prescription ( rubschin:) and one from some dumb scratchcard. SWMBO would know they are free. Nul points
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Not if you bought her a pretty one!
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Good grief. She doesn't do PINK!
She does purple. I hate purple. In 20 years I have never told her this!
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More cheese?
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Good grief. She doesn't do PINK!
She does purple. I hate purple. In 20 years I have never told her this!
You can get purple ones.
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Oh good grief. Why can't she enjoy pants, socks and stuff. She has a favourite purple handbag now noooo:
Daft
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Well what does she enjoy? Does she actually enjoy being in the kitchen? My bestest ever present would be a kitchen aid mixer. cloud9:
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KITCHEN eeek: eeek: eeek: eeek:
Are you mad?
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Miss D wants a stick of rock from Spain. I can't imagine what she is on about. Do they do rock?
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Well, there are rocks yes, but I'm not sure they exist in the sweetie variety. There are far better things to bring back!
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Straw Donkeys and sombreros whistle:
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Right. So what have you told Mr Wench to get for you?
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Miss D wants a stick of rock from Spain. I can't imagine what she is on about. Do they do rock?
Not me....think you are getting your women mixed up ..I want things that will last lol:
As for your dilemma's - why don't you organise a nice weekend away for the two of you ... city break / country retreat ...whatever floats your boat. If you don't want to go or child care might be difficult arrange it for her and her best mate - that way they are guaranteed to have a good time. You will get shed loads of brownie points and a harmonius christmas all round.
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http://www.thewhitecompany.com/department2.aspx?DepGrpCode=CPJ&DepCode=CASX
Some more of these, an ipod shuffle, a moleskiene notebook, orla kiely mugs, facestuff, earrings, some stuff from etsy.com, a new cath kidston bag, gift vouchers to the fabric/wool shop, books, dvds, cds, itunes gift certificates, new kitchen knives, a new mixer, manicure vouchers, a trip to the theatre, make-up, new cutlery, perfume there is more. I pretty much make a huge list and he picks off it and adds some suprises too.
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One year I thought long and hard and got LL a 'cheque book of promises' wot I made up on the computer... It was great because,
a) It cost me nuffink
b) She was absolutely thrilled and showed everybody that came to the house
c) She has never cashed any of them...
whistle:
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I can't believe she never cashed any of them! What is wrong with the woman?
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Oh boy - you are going to be really really busy next year now noooo:
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I can't believe she never cashed any of them! What is wrong with the woman?
She has more sense ~ prolly gets a man in ~ look at the decorating, look at the chimney rebuild ..... need I say more?
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Oh boy - you are going to be really really busy next year now noooo:
Noooo... this was a couple of years ago...
It is still in pristine condition and I've told her that now we've changed to the Euro she can't cash them! cloud9:
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I can't believe she never cashed any of them! What is wrong with the woman?
She has more sense ~ prolly gets a man in ~ look at the decorating, look at the chimney rebuild ..... need I say more?
Oi! She's thrilled with that fireplace like! cussing:
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I can't believe she never cashed any of them! What is wrong with the woman?
She has more sense ~ prolly gets a man in ~ look at the decorating, look at the chimney rebuild ..... need I say more?
Oi! She's thrilled with that fireplace like! cussing:
Seen the floor yet has she?
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I can't believe she never cashed any of them! What is wrong with the woman?
She has more sense ~ prolly gets a man in ~ look at the decorating, look at the chimney rebuild ..... need I say more?
Oi! She's thrilled with that fireplace like! cussing:
Seen the floor yet has she?
whistle:
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Noooo... this was a couple of years ago...
It is still in pristine condition and I've told her that now we've changed to the Euro she can't cash them! cloud9:
Has she not asked for her credits to be transferred to a pre paid mastercard yet ???
I feel a pm is in the offfing ;D
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Noooo... this was a couple of years ago...
It is still in pristine condition and I've told her that now we've changed to the Euro she can't cash them! cloud9:
Has she not asked for her credits to be transferred to a pre paid mastercard yet ???
I feel a pm is in the offfing ;D
eeek:
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[recovers quickly]
Money can't buy a gift like that... whistle:
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No indeed it can't, which is the point I was trying to make! It was a super idea.
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No indeed it can't, which is the point I was trying to make! It was a super idea.
Thanks you... I thought long and hard to come up with it as I've mentioned previously... whistle:
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Many, many hours of personal thought took place.
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http://www.thisisventure.co.uk/
Family portrait. We did this for MILFH for her 60th birthday. She has more traditional taste so we went to an ordinary portrait studio but I think these folks are fab.
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I've always fancied an alternative career as a personal shopper ......given the need on this thread alone I could make a fortune.
Wenchy - are you interetsed in setting up a consultancy ? lol:
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I've always fancied an alternative career as a personal shopper ......given the need on this thread alone I could make a fortune.
Wenchy - are you interetsed in setting up a consultancy ? lol:
Wouldn't work ~ you two can't resist giving opinions, we don't need to pay for them, just sit and wait. point:
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They want money. I shall set up an account at Tesco (£50)
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Wouldn't work ~ you two can't resist giving opinions, we don't need to pay for them, just sit and wait. point:
You lot - sit and wait - how very civilised !!!! happy001
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Many, many hours of personal thought took place.
Many, many, many!
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Wouldn't work ~ you two can't resist giving opinions, we don't need to pay for them, just sit and wait. point:
You lot - sit and wait - how very civilised !!!! happy001
BONKERS noooo: noooo:
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I've always fancied an alternative career as a personal shopper ......given the need on this thread alone I could make a fortune.
Wenchy - are you interetsed in setting up a consultancy ? lol:
I'm doing the same thing at work this week. It's pathetic. noooo:
High on the success list here this year are hunters coloured wellies.
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I reckon I could be a personal shopper... for gadgets like... home cinema... I get it you watch it kind of thing...? rubschin:
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They like soap noooo: noooo: noooo: noooo:
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They like soap noooo: noooo: noooo: noooo:
Who??? Shrugs:
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Gerls
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Lush? Visit them, all many of nice smelly things.
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Lush? Visit them, all many of nice smelly things.
And they spend their money supporting Airport Invaders
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Ahhh yes, I knew there was a reason I'd decided not to shop there!
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I reckon I could be a personal shopper... for gadgets like... home cinema... I get it you watch it kind of thing...? rubschin:
with 5 seats?
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I reckon I could be a personal shopper... for gadgets like... home cinema... I get it you watch it kind of thing...? rubschin:
with 5 seats?
As many as you like if you are paying... er like... whistle:
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CAn Wenchy sit on my lap?
I have kevlar
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Can Wenchy sit on my lap?
Is that question based on morality or science?
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CAn Wenchy sit on my lap?
Are you wearing your 'special' red and white outfit today dear Nicholas?
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CAn Wenchy sit on my lap?
Are you wearing your 'special' red and white outfit today dear Nicholas?
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fdurhamregion.typepad.com%2Fquestions%2Fimages%2Fmcdonaldsronaldc160x265.jpeg&hash=b6c1a9323d3a9844ec4d8c5b7e0cac1c1e589775)
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Ronald McDonald scares me. noooo:
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Ronald McDonald scares me. noooo:
Don't all clowns scare you - or was that somebody else...? rubschin:
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me scared2:
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Not me. Clowns in general are ok.
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Not me. Clowns in general are ok.
No no no no no no no no no no no nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
they are all evil and demented and pyschos and twisted and warped and perverse and just plain ffffing sick cussing:
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Not me. Clowns in general are ok.
No no no no no no no no no no no nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
they are all evil and demented and pyschos and twisted and warped and perverse and just plain ffffing sick cussing:
Oh poor you...
Why can I remember all these things but not what I did yesterday...? rubschin:
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me scared2:
See also Berek ~ who is scared of clowns too ~ there is a name for that particular phobia but I can't remember it.
Someone will no doubt Google it now.
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me scared2:
See also Berek ~ who is scared of clowns too ~ there is a name for that particular phobia but I can't remember it.
Someone will no doubt Google it now.
Clownashitaphobia? rubschin:
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me scared2:
See also Berek ~ who is scared of clowns too ~ there is a name for that particular phobia but I can't remember it.
Someone will no doubt Google it now.
Clownashitaphobia? rubschin:
Cocophobia
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Coulrophobia
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Coulrophobia
Oh Wenchy! evil:
That would have kept us amused for hours... noooo:
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Coulrophobia
Oh Wenchy! evil:
That would have kept us amused for hours... noooo:
I am desolate now.
Pages of clown related quips screwed up and in the bin. sad24: sad32:
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But I actually knew it! And if it has saved me from pages of clown puns then it was well worth it!
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MOVING ON cry:
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Coulrophobia
Oh Wenchy! evil:
That would have kept us amused for hours... noooo:
I am desolate now.
Pages of clown related quips screwed up and in the bin. sad24: sad32:
And me... I had some great ones too... sad24: