The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Barman on December 19, 2008, 06:59:29 PM

Title: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 19, 2008, 06:59:29 PM
LL has been out shopping in Windsor today and bought three hats... plus some 'fascinators' from a shop that was closing down like...  eeek:

She's only worn a hat twice in her life and now she has three new ones... WTF?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Darwins Selection on December 19, 2008, 07:17:39 PM
LL has been out shopping in Windsor today and bought three hats... plus some 'fascinators' from a shop that was closing down like...  eeek:

She's only worn a hat twice in her life and now she has three new ones... WTF?  rubschin:

To wear at 3 Christenings?














 point: Papoose
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Snoopy on December 19, 2008, 07:19:32 PM
It's a woman thing ~ just go with it.











Brownie points can be earned by asking her to try them on and by admiring her in them if you get my drift  eyes:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Darwins Selection on December 19, 2008, 07:22:49 PM
It's a woman thing ~ just go with it.

Brownie points can be earned by asking her to try them on and by admiring her in them if you get my drift  eyes:

Especially if that is all she is wearing.  eyes:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Snoopy on December 19, 2008, 07:27:58 PM
It's a woman thing ~ just go with it.

Brownie points can be earned by asking her to try them on and by admiring her in them if you get my drift  eyes:

Especially if that is all she is wearing.  eyes:

And the shoes she plans to wear the hats with eyes: eyes: eyes:

NURSE! The Screens and a box of Kleenex please
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 20, 2008, 07:24:31 AM
How are we even going to get them home...?  noooo:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: GROWLER on December 20, 2008, 07:37:35 AM
How are we even going to get them home...?  noooo:

Well you could wear one, she the other, and 'lose' the last one.
Help keep your baldy 'ed warm too.

Sorted. happy088

Every cloud ey, every cloud......
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 20, 2008, 07:38:36 AM
How are we even going to get them home...?  noooo:

Well you could wear one, she the other, and 'lose' the last one.
Help keep your baldy 'ed warm too.

Sorted. happy088

Every cloud ey, every cloud......
rubschin:

Apart from looking ridiculous I can see no flaw in your logic...
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: GROWLER on December 20, 2008, 07:45:52 AM
How are we even going to get them home...?  noooo:

Well you could wear one, she the other, and 'lose' the last one.
Help keep your baldy 'ed warm too.

Sorted. happy088

Every cloud ey, every cloud......
rubschin:

Apart from looking ridiculous I can see no flaw in your logic...

Well put one of her frocks on too then, and travel 'ome as a tranny?

Only trying to help solve your predicament like. sad32:

OK then, just 'lose' all of them?

Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 20, 2008, 07:47:31 AM
How are we even going to get them home...?  noooo:

Well you could wear one, she the other, and 'lose' the last one.
Help keep your baldy 'ed warm too.

Sorted. happy088

Every cloud ey, every cloud......
rubschin:

Apart from looking ridiculous I can see no flaw in your logic...

Well put one of her frocks on too then, and travel 'ome as a tranny?

Only trying to help solve your predicament like. sad32:

OK then, just 'lose' all of them?


Tranny eh...  rubschin:


No, fuck it... we'll lose them....  ;D
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 20, 2008, 07:49:13 AM
BTW... how much do you think you would have to pay for an 'at like...?
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: GROWLER on December 20, 2008, 07:59:14 AM
BTW... how much do you think you would have to pay for an 'at like...?

Dunno. Shrugs:
 Don't really pay any attention to wimmins stuff tbh, but seem to remember them costing a fortune even back in the 60's when me mum would spend bloody hours dragging me around Lewis's in L'pool trying every 'at in the store on. ::)
20 snotters each p'raps? eeek:

Bloody waste imo anyway. I mean, you...they...only wear them for weddings christenings and funerals these days...unless your over 65, in which case it then bacomes permissable to wear one of those wooly 'daft twats 'ats'

Mmmm...1,2,3. rubschin:
 She not telling you something...especially the last one? Black per chance?
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 20, 2008, 08:07:32 AM
No, none of them black...  noooo:

Bare in mind these are little wispy bits of material and feathers like... not a safety device made out of carbon fibre/kevlar/titanium hat might save your life if a brick fell on yer 'ed...

Fifteen quid each!  eeek:

I thought she was mad but the sticker price was a hundred and fifty quid - for an 'at like!  noooo:

I'm in the wrong business, I really am... sod climbing up ladders when you can get a hundred and fifty quid for a little bit of lace worth 25p...

Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Miss Demeanour on December 20, 2008, 09:19:24 AM
I don't like hats.

The only hats that I will wear are big thick wolly things for when the temperatures are sub zero - not a common occurrence.

The only other use for a hat is for when your hair is a state and you can't be arsed to wash / style it.

Some people look great in them but I'm afraid I'm not one of them cry:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Snoopy on December 20, 2008, 09:23:45 AM
I imagine LL would look good in a hat. As Miss D says some women do and some don't. My own lady wears hats most days. Not the silly sorts of bits of feather etc you see at Ascot but none the less she owns about 20 hats.
Yes ~They can be expensive and no doubt LL's logic was that far from spending £45 she has saved £405.
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 20, 2008, 09:24:55 AM
I imagine LL would look good in a hat. As Miss D says some women do and some don't. My own lady wears hats most days. Not the silly sorts of bits of feather etc you see at Ascot but none the less she owns about 20 hats.
Yes ~They can be expensive and no doubt LL's logic was that far from spending £45 she has saved £405.
... which she will spend today....  noooo:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Snoopy on December 20, 2008, 09:27:14 AM
I imagine LL would look good in a hat. As Miss D says some women do and some don't. My own lady wears hats most days. Not the silly sorts of bits of feather etc you see at Ascot but none the less she owns about 20 hats.
Yes ~They can be expensive and no doubt LL's logic was that far from spending £45 she has saved £405.
... which she will spend today....  noooo:

But she wouldn't have had it to spend if she hadn't saved it on the hats  whistle:














I've been down this road mate ~ just accept it and demand your "payment" the minute you get home.  eyes:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 20, 2008, 09:29:21 AM
I imagine LL would look good in a hat. As Miss D says some women do and some don't. My own lady wears hats most days. Not the silly sorts of bits of feather etc you see at Ascot but none the less she owns about 20 hats.
Yes ~They can be expensive and no doubt LL's logic was that far from spending £45 she has saved £405.
... which she will spend today....  noooo:

But she wouldn't have had it to spend if she hadn't saved it on the hats  whistle:














I've been down this road mate ~ just accept it and demand your "payment" the minute you get home.  eyes:
I'd prolly get paid in hats...  noooo:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 20, 2008, 09:29:54 AM
I don't like hats.

The only hats that I will wear are big thick wolly things for when the temperatures are sub zero - not a common occurrence.

The only other use for a hat is for when your hair is a state and you can't be arsed to wash / style it.

Some people look great in them but I'm afraid I'm not one of them cry:
You paint an endearing image...  lol:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: GROWLER on December 20, 2008, 10:18:52 AM


The only hats that I will wear are big thick wolly things for when the temperatures are sub zero - not a common occurrence.


You over 65 then?  lol:

I've gorra 'at. Blue and thermal with a ciggy burn on it. Look like a bloody bun loaf in it. Luuuurvlee. Kids reckon I look like a tramp in it. cloud9:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: GROWLER on December 20, 2008, 10:20:47 AM
BTW, it's 'ats, not hats. ::)
Speak proper wills you's please
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Miss Demeanour on December 20, 2008, 03:21:55 PM


The only hats that I will wear are big thick wolly things for when the temperatures are sub zero - not a common occurrence.


You over 65 then?  lol:

I've gorra 'at. Blue and thermal with a ciggy burn on it. Look like a bloody bun loaf in it. Luuuurvlee. Kids reckon I look like a tramp in it. cloud9:

Cheeky bastard  lol:

Take twenty five hat wearing years off that and your calculations would be more accurate.

As for your hat Compo ....sounds luverly  eeek:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Pastis on December 20, 2008, 03:25:22 PM
Take that axe to his karma MissD  ;)  He's riding far too high  eyes:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: GROWLER on December 20, 2008, 04:42:04 PM


The only hats that I will wear are big thick wolly things for when the temperatures are sub zero - not a common occurrence.


You over 65 then?  lol:

I've gorra 'at. Blue and thermal with a ciggy burn on it. Look like a bloody bun loaf in it. Luuuurvlee. Kids reckon I look like a tramp in it. cloud9:

Cheeky bastard  lol:

Yup. That's me I'm (not) afraid. razz:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: grumpyoldsoldier on December 22, 2008, 08:09:55 PM
Dementia my missus, (you might have read about her in the news today) is somewhat partial to her Carmen Miranda hats. She is quite an imposing sight bearing down at speed in the breakfast cereals aisle in Asda,  especially with the wind coming off the port quarter.
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Bar Wench on December 22, 2008, 08:19:16 PM
LL could store her hats at my place if she likes!  whistle:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Nick on December 22, 2008, 08:19:23 PM
What's a 'fascinator'?
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Darwins Selection on December 22, 2008, 08:34:36 PM
What's a 'fascinator'?

Dangly bits.

Normally worn by women with ideas above their station.

How refreshing to see that normal, down to earth ladies like LL also like them.
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Bar Wench on December 22, 2008, 08:36:32 PM
Like an alice band or clip with lace, feathers, beads attached to it.
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 22, 2008, 08:37:10 PM
LL could store her hats at my place if she likes!  whistle:
rubschin:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Nick on December 22, 2008, 10:02:32 PM
Like an alice band or clip with lace, feathers, beads attached to it.


 noooo:

Why?
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 22, 2008, 11:22:53 PM
Like an alice band or clip with lace, feathers, beads attached to it.


 noooo:

Why?
Shrugs:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Bar Wench on December 23, 2008, 08:37:16 AM
Because they are pretty! And actually LL's sound like an absolute bargin!
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 23, 2008, 08:50:52 AM
Because they are pretty! And actually LL's sound like an absolute bargin!
Oh yes, a bargain because she was actually going out to buy hats and tittilizers or whatever and found them in the sale...  noooo:

Now my electric toothbrush - that was a bargain!

Went into Boots to buy an electric toothbrush and was confronted by a girl giving out leaflets... before I could elbow her in the face and push her out of the way she quickly saw the danger and said "special offer, 50% off electric toothbrushes luvleee..."

So I saved 50% on my electric toothbrush, the one I was going to buy anyway... do you see...?

That was a bargain...

If she's said 50% off colour TVs or razors and I'd bought one of those and a electric toothbrush that would not be a bargain.  Banghead
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Bar Wench on December 23, 2008, 08:58:27 AM
But she would have bought them in the longterm, for weddings christenings and the like so it is a long range investment in barginism.
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 23, 2008, 09:02:31 AM
But she would have bought them in the longterm, for weddings christenings and the like so it is a long range investment in barginism.
Foolish child...  ::)

Come the next wedding it will be: -

a) Where did I put that fascinator?
b) I left the hats in England 'cos I couldn't get them on the 'plane without crushing them
c) I left them in Cyprus
d) They are the wrong colour for this outfit
e) The colour clashes with the bride's dress

etc.  noooo:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 23, 2008, 10:03:12 AM
Children - Just to set the record straight, firstly this is LL using BM's login in (which he isn't happy about) and secondly the 'at's and fascinators were an absolute bargain and could NOT be resisted........................In fact I believe I was VERY restrained in only buying three 'at's and four fascinators. Now my reasoning was:

Weddings always occur and therefore one needs an 'at on numerous occasions
They are three different colours - one IS black (usual at different festivities) and is very dominatrix with sort of metal twirlly bits zapping across the front, one is a golden colour (can be matched with numerous outfit colours) and one is a beautiful dusty pink shade and has fabulous swirly bits on top and side
The fascinators (five of them) consist of a petrol blue and black feathery thing which will be loaned to Miss Piggy for an upcoming wedding May next year when she is bridesmaid (this is actually the Ex hubby's wedding to which I will ALSO be going  whistle:) three are black feathery things with silver swirly things and the last is bright red - now these four were bought at their bargain price of a tenner each (normally between 45-60 each) in anticipation of a friends western themed 70th birthday party next year as 'the ladies' will be dressing a western bar girls so they will come in very handy in the costume effect department
In total my outlay was ninety pounds for all nine fine items - therefore saving an HUGE £600+ which may be spent later but SADLY  noooo: noooo: noooo: not on a new projector!!!!!

Kay thats all for now#
Love to all
LL xx

To all ladies , particularly Mrs TG, all 'ats are opening for borrowing at any time   
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Bar Wench on December 23, 2008, 10:08:15 AM
www.wenchystoragesolutions.com

We offer very competative rates for hat storage! Especially for the dusky pink one.  whistle:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 23, 2008, 10:10:03 AM
www.wenchystoragesolutions.com

We offer very competative rates for hat storage! Especially for the dusky pink one.  whistle:
noooo:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Snoopy on December 23, 2008, 10:23:38 AM
What's a 'fascinator'?

Two hundred and ten thousand possible answers at:
http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&q=Fascinator&btnG=Google+Search&meta=


For an educated man who claims such empathy with wimmin you show a remarkable lack of knowledge of things feminine.  noooo:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Nick on December 23, 2008, 10:31:28 AM
I only recognise certain sorts of underwear
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Snoopy on December 23, 2008, 10:34:04 AM
Children - Just to set the record straight, firstly this is LL using BM's login in (which he isn't happy about) and secondly the 'at's and fascinators were an absolute bargain and could NOT be resisted........................In fact I believe I was VERY restrained in only buying three 'at's and four fascinators. Now my reasoning was:

Weddings always occur and therefore one needs an 'at on numerous occasions
They are three different colours - one IS black (usual at different festivities) and is very dominatrix with sort of metal twirlly bits zapping across the front, one is a golden colour (can be matched with numerous outfit colours) and one is a beautiful dusty pink shade and has fabulous swirly bits on top and side
The fascinators (five of them) consist of a petrol blue and black feathery thing which will be loaned to Miss Piggy for an upcoming wedding May next year when she is bridesmaid (this is actually the Ex hubby's wedding to which I will ALSO be going  whistle:) three are black feathery things with silver swirly things and the last is bright red - now these four were bought at their bargain price of a tenner each (normally between 45-60 each) in anticipation of a friends western themed 70th birthday party next year as 'the ladies' will be dressing a western bar girls so they will come in very handy in the costume effect department
In total my outlay was ninety pounds for all nine fine items - therefore saving an HUGE £600+ which may be spent later but SADLY  noooo: noooo: noooo: not on a new projector!!!!!

Kay thats all for now#
Love to all
LL xx

To all ladies , particularly Mrs TG, all 'ats are opening for borrowing at any time   

I fully understand ~ but then my mother always wore hats,
my first wife wore hats  and was indeed wearing one the day we met
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.britairforce.com%2Fimages%2Fraf_hat_wraf_qc.jpg&hash=2e6df568937baf95f5ea0689554f1d9f0aff1d69)
and my present wife wears hats daily in the Autumn and Winter as well as to every occasion that she deems "special" including to attend Church every Sunday.

Of course not all the fripperies are hats as such, some are/were just wisps of lace and a feather but personally I love ladies in hats.

For myself I have worn hats for as long as I can remembers. School caps, RAF Berets and Service Caps, etc. I have a collection of some dozen hats including those that only see daylight at cricket matches, others on the river bank and one should I go to a race meeting or point to point..

Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Snoopy on December 23, 2008, 10:36:52 AM
I only recognise certain sorts of underwear

And then had to have a whole thread to tell you how to get into them IIRC
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Nick on December 23, 2008, 10:37:23 AM
Mrs Nick bought herself a trilby in Granada. It actually quite suits her  rubschin:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Snoopy on December 23, 2008, 10:38:14 AM
Then she and I can go to the races together as I too have trilby for that very purpose.
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Pastis on December 23, 2008, 11:26:28 AM
I'm quite partial to a titfer  rubschin:

Panama in the hotter climes and Fedora for the cooler  cool14:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Snoopy on December 23, 2008, 11:30:22 AM
I'm quite partial to a titfer  rubschin:

Panama in the hotter climes and Fedora for the cooler  cool14:

Twentyeight days?

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fupload.moldova.org%2Fmovie%2Fmovies%2Fg%2Fgreat_escape_the%2Fthumbnails%2Ftn2_great_escape_2.jpg&hash=d1ec283f986a759defaaaa53fc6444908c2ab958)
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Pastis on December 23, 2008, 11:33:42 AM
 drumroll:



 lol: lol:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 23, 2008, 01:05:26 PM
 lol: lol:

The 'old' Snoopy is back!  cloud9:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Snoopy on December 23, 2008, 01:06:28 PM
lol: lol:

The 'old' Snoopy is back!  cloud9:

I never went anywhere  cussing:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Nick on December 23, 2008, 01:07:11 PM
He has been a bit snappy of late  rubschin:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 23, 2008, 01:07:21 PM
lol: lol:

The 'old' Snoopy is back!  cloud9:

I never went anywhere  cussing:
Of course...  scared:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: grumpyoldsoldier on December 23, 2008, 02:04:23 PM
I only recognise certain sorts of underwear
mmmmm, sports kit as it is referred to in the GOS household cloud9:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: grumpyoldsoldier on December 23, 2008, 02:06:52 PM
I'm quite partial to a titfer  rubschin:

Panama in the hotter climes and Fedora for the cooler  cool14:

Twentyeight days?

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fupload.moldova.org%2Fmovie%2Fmovies%2Fg%2Fgreat_escape_the%2Fthumbnails%2Ftn2_great_escape_2.jpg&hash=d1ec283f986a759defaaaa53fc6444908c2ab958)

"Try to nick my biro would you? American pig dog, throw him to the ground roughly Klaus!"
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Tinkerbell on December 23, 2008, 04:59:30 PM
Children - Just to set the record straight, firstly this is LL using BM's login in (which he isn't happy about) and secondly the 'at's and fascinators were an absolute bargain and could NOT be resisted........................In fact I believe I was VERY restrained in only buying three 'at's and four fascinators. Now my reasoning was:

Weddings always occur and therefore one needs an 'at on numerous occasions
They are three different colours - one IS black (usual at different festivities) and is very dominatrix with sort of metal twirlly bits zapping across the front, one is a golden colour (can be matched with numerous outfit colours) and one is a beautiful dusty pink shade and has fabulous swirly bits on top and side
The fascinators (five of them) consist of a petrol blue and black feathery thing which will be loaned to Miss Piggy for an upcoming wedding May next year when she is bridesmaid (this is actually the Ex hubby's wedding to which I will ALSO be going  whistle:) three are black feathery things with silver swirly things and the last is bright red - now these four were bought at their bargain price of a tenner each (normally between 45-60 each) in anticipation of a friends western themed 70th birthday party next year as 'the ladies' will be dressing a western bar girls so they will come in very handy in the costume effect department
In total my outlay was ninety pounds for all nine fine items - therefore saving an HUGE £600+ which may be spent later but SADLY  noooo: noooo: noooo: not on a new projector!!!!!

Kay thats all for now#
Love to all
LL xx

To all ladies , particularly Mrs TG, all 'ats are opening for borrowing at any time   

TO LL

Well said there LL...... they sound excellent value.... what about the matching shoes & bags... won't the sales start before you leave??    ;)
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 23, 2008, 09:51:41 PM
Children - Just to set the record straight, firstly this is LL using BM's login in (which he isn't happy about) and secondly the 'at's and fascinators were an absolute bargain and could NOT be resisted........................In fact I believe I was VERY restrained in only buying three 'at's and four fascinators. Now my reasoning was:

Weddings always occur and therefore one needs an 'at on numerous occasions
They are three different colours - one IS black (usual at different festivities) and is very dominatrix with sort of metal twirlly bits zapping across the front, one is a golden colour (can be matched with numerous outfit colours) and one is a beautiful dusty pink shade and has fabulous swirly bits on top and side
The fascinators (five of them) consist of a petrol blue and black feathery thing which will be loaned to Miss Piggy for an upcoming wedding May next year when she is bridesmaid (this is actually the Ex hubby's wedding to which I will ALSO be going  whistle:) three are black feathery things with silver swirly things and the last is bright red - now these four were bought at their bargain price of a tenner each (normally between 45-60 each) in anticipation of a friends western themed 70th birthday party next year as 'the ladies' will be dressing a western bar girls so they will come in very handy in the costume effect department
In total my outlay was ninety pounds for all nine fine items - therefore saving an HUGE £600+ which may be spent later but SADLY  noooo: noooo: noooo: not on a new projector!!!!!

Kay thats all for now#
Love to all
LL xx

To all ladies , particularly Mrs TG, all 'ats are opening for borrowing at any time   

TO LL

Well said there LL...... they sound excellent value.... what about the matching shoes & bags... won't the sales start before you leave??    ;)

 noooo:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Darwins Selection on December 24, 2008, 04:25:14 PM
This is a proper hat.

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.saddler.co.uk%2Fprodpics%2Fready%2Fbarbour_crieff_tweed_cap_large.jpg&hash=7a38f71c64a05377f797f794793e65b7c74fe6fe)
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Barman on December 24, 2008, 04:57:37 PM
This is a proper hat.

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.saddler.co.uk%2Fprodpics%2Fready%2Fbarbour_crieff_tweed_cap_large.jpg&hash=7a38f71c64a05377f797f794793e65b7c74fe6fe)

That's not a proper 'at - that's something to make your eyes go blurry and make you think you've had a V&T to many  noooo:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Just One More on December 24, 2008, 05:08:47 PM
Bloody hell, where's me whippet. Darwin, you'd look like Foggy Dewhurst  point:
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Snoopy on December 24, 2008, 05:14:53 PM
Bloody hell, where's me whippet. Darwin, you'd look like Foggy Dewhurst  point:

T'bloody whippet is on't t'other end of thy piece o' string thee daft boogger.

20 years it took me to learn to talk like that. ::)
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Just One More on December 24, 2008, 05:23:56 PM
I was doing it from one year old, see thee
Title: Re: Hats
Post by: Snoopy on December 24, 2008, 05:27:48 PM
I think you mean

I were doin' it from t'age o' t'one, sethee


Clearly living down south has had a civilizing effect on you.