The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => The Medical Centre => Topic started by: TG on April 26, 2009, 12:11:30 PM
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Well one day. But it seems the media is determined to scare the shite out of us by whipping us into a frenzied panic about our imminent death in a flu pandemic.
Mrs TG works at a health centre at the university so I suspect every student who has heard another human being sneeze will be in a panic and demanding instant inoculation against 'swine flu' or any other type of flu for that matter.
So, you have been warned people. Get yourself down the supermarket and stock up on bottled water, hankies, night nurse and White Lightening.
Good luck and may god walk with you.
TG survival tip #1 : Buy Series one of 'survivors' on DVD and get lots of helpful advice on how to survive in the post-pandemic world. happy088
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I have a sniffle noooo:
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I have a sniffle noooo:
scared2:
point: point: point:
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I have a sniffle noooo:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Fsmileys%2Fsmiley-sick013.gif&hash=1c62f25f8bcc8ac2a4f6473a589fdff5660e754f) (http://www.freesmileys.org)
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Well, according to David Attenbrough this is just what the
doctor ordered nature plannned Shrugs:
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Well, according to David Attenbrough this is just what the doctor ordered nature plannned Shrugs:
A good cull... excellent.... eveilgrin:
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We have spent a fortune on planning for an event of this kind......whichever animal it was transmitted by.
This has now turned into the emergency continuity planner's wet dream scenario - hope they are left disappointed eeek:
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According to the wireless it could affect 15 million people in this country eveilgrin:
I bet. Maybe the entire Cabinet could get it and die eveilgrin:
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We have spent a fortune on planning for an event of this kind......whichever animal it was transmitted by.
This has now turned into the emergency continuity planner's wet dream scenario - hope they are left disappointed eeek:
All leave cancelled then? eeek:
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We have a stock of vaccinations whistle:
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We have a stock of vaccinations whistle:
Bring some with you next week then like.... ;)
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I will be a carrier of other stuff next week ::)
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I will be a carrier of other stuff next week ::)
redface:
Well, you don't have to carry the projector now.... noooo:
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True...
You don't need any extra protection . I can wipe away your sniffles with my axe eveilgrin:
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Now now Miss D, be nice to BM. After all BM is old enough to remember the Spanish Lady so he's bound to be worried about this outbreak. whistle:
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I believe one of the newest trends is that there is an increased death rate in the young and healthy whistle:
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I'm neither - yippee (!)
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I won't panic until all those younger and healthier than I am have kicked the bucket then Miss D. whistle:
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Indeed - and none of us are vulnerable are we rubschin:
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I think I might get a Mexican Airline tag to put on the briefcase ~ should guarantee a seat on the train. ;)
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drumroll:
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The main reason that younger people are being affected more is because we are cleaner now than we were in the past so they aren't exposed to the same amount of germs and bugs which build up the immune system Miss D.
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I think I might get a Mexican Airline tag to put on the briefcase ~ should guarantee a seat on the train. ;)
lol: lol: lol:
a tee shirt with "I Flu Air Mexico" would also be good.
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The main reason that younger people are being affected more is because we are cleaner now than we were in the past so they aren't exposed to the same amount of germs and bugs which build up the immune system Miss D.
Doesn't apply to teenagers then evil:
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True...
You don't need any extra protection . I can wipe away your sniffles with my axe eveilgrin:
eeek:
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I think I might get a Mexican Airline tag to put on the briefcase ~ should guarantee a seat on the train. ;)
lol: lol: lol:
a tee shirt with "I Flu Air Mexico" would also be good.
drumroll:
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Now, where did I put that poncho? rubschin:
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All those poor hay fever sufferers will now have to be isolated and tested until they can prove that they pose no risk to us whistle:
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I can see sick leave going through the roof now. The moment someone calls in saying that they have flu the boss will be screaming at them down the phone to stay away. whistle:
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They are blaming international air travel - great news for the tree-huggers, yet another reason to batter the airlines!
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I blame the pigs
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They do seem to be hogging the news today.
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They do seem to be hogging the news today.
Indeed, the airwaves are crackling with it. ::)
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They are blaming international air travel
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2Fgx26urgS.jpg&hash=6e1d7207bfb6a8d6e1f92939cd9a96a1c4c18fc9) (http://www.postimage.org/)
And they said it couldn't be done! confused:
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Hollywood is in mourning after the body of Warner Brothers star Porky Pig was found this morning at his home in Acalpulco, Mexico where he retired from a 60 year film career a decade ago. The coroner suggests that Porky succumbed to the recent outbreak of the Swine Flu.
Porky, age 78, was found by his life companion Elmer Fudd who immediately called for an ambulance. Porky was pronounced dead at the scene and his body taken to El Morte funeral chapel in downtown Acapulco for services on Tuesday.
Pig, a stalwart actor appeared in over 300 cartoons and was the frequent favourite of fans around the world who waited in line for a chance to see him oink his way into their hearts.
Fans are requested to send condolences to the Armour Meat Packing company where Porky will be made into sausages and pork chops.
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PS His family have asked for privacy while they come to terms with the loss ...
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FPqomCGi.jpg&hash=a65a7b074db2a26f37cb55cb8397742bea75f50d) (http://www.postimage.org/)
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They are blaming international air travel
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2Fgx26urgS.jpg&hash=6e1d7207bfb6a8d6e1f92939cd9a96a1c4c18fc9) (http://www.postimage.org/)
And they said it couldn't be done! confused:
To be fair Snoop there is an epidemiological basis for the argument. If you can fly from one major city to another in on average a few hours then an outbreak can spread quickly and easily as an infected individual can potentially arrive before he starts showing symptoms.
lol: Miss D.
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Swine Flew ~ it was a pun you nit! Banghead
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I know hound, I'm just having a bad day. redface:
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No change there then! eveilgrin:
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Coming from you Nick I'll take that as a compliment. point:
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Anybody dead yet? How old are you all?
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Apparently I'm one of the youngest member so I guess I'm the canary unless Wenchy is younger than I am. scared2:
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Wenchy is dead! At least, she is very quiet
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Anybody dead yet? How old are you all?
lol:
Tell us what numbers you need and I will cough in the right direction whistle:
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none of us are famous Miss D. Mind you Nick does hob nob with the rich and famous. whistle:
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No but we are all infamous and known to each other - we are getting desperate to declare a winner here noooo:
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Take de time girl ~ it will 'appen eventually.
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I'm not known for my patience redface:
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rubschin: I've known one or two girls like that over the years.
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Of that I have no doubt eyes:
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Anybody dead yet? How old are you all?
lol:
Tell us what numbers you need and I will cough in the right direction whistle:
Thats what I like to hear!
Anywho, Mrs TG tells me they have had the info from the government on what to do in this time of crisis, what forms to fill in, how to order body bags and similar.
I refuse to panic in case I strain myself.
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rubschin: I've known one or two girls like that over the years.
In patience or out patience?
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rubschin: I've known one or two girls like that over the years.
In patience or out patience?
Usually they say things like "Now you b@st@rd ~ NOW!"
Funny ~ they stop saying it once you marry them tunble:
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Those traffic lights do change awfully fast though don't they Snoops lol:
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Sure do and no amber warning light either. cussing:
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Is it safe to come out? I have been barricaded under the stairs with a bottle of Evian, a packet of digestive biscuits, a torch and tranny radio tuned into the home service. scared2:
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It's a bit late in the day to 'come out' GOS but hey - we are all liberal thinking individuals here and will think no differently of you lol:
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I am off to Brum tomorrow. Is it safe to go to New Street Station? Ever?
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Avoid Mexicans
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It's a bit late in the day to 'come out' GOS but hey - we are all liberal thinking individuals here and will think no differently of you lol:
Thank God! I thought for a moment that the Carmen Miranda hat and pink sling backs were a bit OTT
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Do you want to swap nail polishes ???
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you are a cherub cloud9:
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Anyhooo....
Another excellent piece by Leg-Iron...
The 1918 flu pandemic could well be on the way back. If so, it'll be much faster this time because travel is faster and more frequent, because people are far less interested in the potential risk of disease since they think science can cure it all, and because people nowadays don't believe they are mortal.
Well, science can't cure it all. There are many incurable diseases still, enough to keep people like me in work for a long time. The NHS has enough antivirals to treat half the population. That's all of the Labour voters and tons to spare. Half the population can't be treated and of those that are, the success rate of the treatment won't be 100%. Besides, you might go into hospital and be cured of flu, but they have a host of other diseases waiting for you in there. A selection of Labour-sponsored infections, all free on the NHS.
Sounds a bit pessimistic, I know, and the Government tells us the risk is low, but this flu has already spread from Mexico to Australia, New Zealand, America, Colombia, Europe and the UK. China and Russia have reported no cases but then they have a history of keeping problems to themselves. So it's global already. Dizzy has found a map (http://dizzythinks.net/2009/04/tracking-swine-flu.html) which tracks the flu's progress.
Pharmaceutical companies are delighted (http://uk.reuters.com/article/businessNews/idUKTRE53Q12120090427?sp=true). They'll make a fortune out of this and no doubt be reviled for it, but they make the stuff that might save your life so don't be too quick to cast them as evil. Then again, since they'll be taxed to death if they make too much money, they might find it prudent not to produce too much in any one tax year. Ah, if only the socialists hadn't clamped down on success, we might have had enough cheap antivirals for everyone. We might have had small businesses working on new and more effective cures. We might have had graduates in chemistry, biochemistry and microbiology rather than in social engineering, David Beckham and knitting. Hell, if it hadn't been for Labour I might have expanded this business and employed some staff, maybe even a virologist or two. Too late now.
What won't happen is any restriction on anyone travelling to or from the infected areas because that would infringe their human rights. As with foot and mouth, such restrictions won't come into force until the infection has reached the point where they have to be draconian. Early quarantine of a few is in breach of human rights, later quarantine of thousands is not. So far there are tiny numbers of infected people in specific locations. It's easy to say 'bah, it's nothing' because today it's only two cases (http://uk.reuters.com/article/domesticNews/idUKTRE53Q56A20090427). Tomorrow it might not be. Dealing with such an infective agent, tomorrow might be too late.
Sturgeon said the threat to the public remained low.
So far, yes. Let's hope it stays that way. This is 'don't worry about it' from the same government who brought you 'hot tea gives you cancer' and all the other remote possibilities you might die from at some unspecified time in the future. This is from the government whose health and safety brigade ban kettles from common rooms in case someone burns themselves, and put up posters advising you of the best way to pick something up. Barbecue? Oh dear no, you might get bowel cancer in fifty years. Swine flu going global in days? Nah, don't worrry about it.
A total of 22 people who came into contact with the two confirmed cases have been identified but only seven of those have shown what she described as mild symptoms.
'Only' seven out of twenty-two is 'only' a thirty percent infection rate on first contact. Nothing to worry about?
"We remain very encouraged by the fact that, outside Mexico, everyone who has contracted swine flu has experienced mild symptoms only," she said.
Are Mexicans a different species? I was under the impression they came from the same planet as the rest of us. Europeans and Americans are pumped up with medication almost from birth. We take drugs for colds and flu all the time. It'll take the virus a few rounds of infection to overcome that and get into its stride. So I am not reassured that the first cases are mild. They always are.
Already some 'experts' are saying 'Oh, but bird flu is much worse. This isn't bird flu'. No, it isn't. Bird flu didn't spread like this. Bird flu was a scare, a pseudo-pandemic that never came to anything although there are still groups being funded to work on it. They won't want to be overshadowed by pig flu. They'll want their research funding to continue. So they'll play this down for as long as they can, or at least until they catch it.
The silver lining is that it's not the middle of winter. If it was, this flu would be far more deadly. All the same, it is highly infective and could still spread although people's resistance to it should be higher in warmer weather. I wouldn't take the chance though.
Fortunately I'm an antisocial git who works alone and contacts business associates mainly through phone and Email. I visit the pub sometimes but there are fewer people in there these days. My risk is lower than normal because of that.
Watch out for this one and pay no attention to 'oh, it'll be fine' messages. The more people believe that, the more likely it is that it won't be fine.
Remember who's running this country. It's the same lot who had foot and mouth 'under control', let it spread throughout the country and when it was all over, they let it loose again. The same lot who inspired the comeback tour of tuberculosis. The ones who thought it logical to put more infectious diseases inside hospitals than outside them. Every other country might stamp on this disease straight away, but Labour will cherish it and provide it with free accommodation and benefits, subsidised travel and viral rights. As with all the others. To Labour, even a virus is more important than the population of this country.
In any emergency, the safest course of action is to do the opposite of what this government tell you.
There's also the other scenario. The one where a desperate government, crumbling and losing power, seize on an emergency and take advantage of it. (http://andtherewasmethinking.wordpress.com/2009/04/27/now-thats-irony/)
I wouldn't put it past them.
happ096
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'kin ell. drumroll:
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I look better in a face mask anyway Shrugs:
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I look better in a face mask anyway Shrugs:
char067
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I look at it this way. 109,999,850 Mexicans haven't died of the flu. rubschin:
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I look at it this way. 109,999,850 Mexicans haven't died of the flu. rubschin:
Indeed Uncle...
For a world-wide deadly disease there are about 6.77 billion people that it appears to have overlooked so far... whistle:
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Ahh but this is only week one ......peak dying time is a few weeks off yet eeek:
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When the army starts digging giant lime pits then I'll start worrying. Before that Shrugs:
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Pig flu, sponsored by HMG. A new radical approach to tackling the credit crunch and spiralling unemployment figures.
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Panic over. Gordo has announced that we are one of the best prepared countries to deal with the outbreak and all action necessary will be taken to stop any further spread.
Is that like we are the best prepared country to deal with the recession perchance?
We are officially fcuked. Banghead
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/8021916.stm (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/8021916.stm)
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http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/health/don%27t-panic-but-you-are-going-to-die-200904271727/
""It's no surprise this started in a devoutly Catholic country where everyone follows the Pope's instructions to the letter, especially the pig molesters.
"Pig sex, chicken sex, monkey sex - eventually they all come back and bite us on the arse. But not goat sex, that still seems to be fine."
BM breathes a huge sigh of relief point:
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No signs of flu in Cyprus yet rubschin:
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No signs of flu in Cyprus yet rubschin:
You're not here yet... noooo:
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Don't you worry about me...I am a woman - I never get flu only colds whistle:
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So in other words Miss D, you are going to turn up with a little sniffle and BM will suddenly develop a case of the strongest flu known to mankind. whistle:
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I bring no diseases GM eeek:
Just joy and happiness happy001
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I bring no diseases GM eeek:
Just joy and happiness happy001
Are your sisters coming too then...? eeek:
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I bring no diseases GM eeek:
Just joy and happiness happy001
You don't have to bring one Miss D. Something tells me that the next time BM is ill it will be supermanflu. whistle:
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It should be interesting at the end of the week when Thompson and Thomas Cook fly back a few thousand holiday makers from Mexico rubschin:
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Right, I propose :
1/ That all boozers should wear a mask whilst in the pub. (bagsy me the Gordon Brown mask)
2/ Anybody who sneezes into a bar towel is barred.
3/ I will cough in the face of any bastard that knocks on my door and tries to convince me to switch electricity suppliers while I am trying to post shite on here. Which someone just did.
4/ That everybody buys a bag of peanuts so that I can see the breasts of that woman on that card thing.
More emergency measures may follow. scared2:
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Right, I propose :
1/ That all boozers should wear a mask whilst in the pub. (bagsy me the Gordon Brown mask)
2/ Anybody who sneezes into a bar towel is barred.
3/ I will cough in the face of any bastard that knocks on my door and tries to convince me to switch electricity suppliers while I am trying to post shite on here. Which someone just did.
4/ That everybody buys a bag of peanuts so that I can see the breasts of that woman on that card thing.
More emergency measures may follow. scared2:
happ096
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A comment on the BBC News Site...
I wasn't too worried about Mexican swine flu (after all pigs can't fly) until I read that Gordon Brown said that Britain was well placed to deal with it.
Perhaps they can
lol: lol: lol:
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Pimp my mask eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2Fgx2cshY0.jpg&hash=afcf94e3228f538f4463bfd4b0ca597a4a16f3db) (http://www.postimage.org/)
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Pimp my mask eeek:
lol:
You look different somehow rubschin:
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Pimp my mask eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2Fgx2cshY0.jpg&hash=afcf94e3228f538f4463bfd4b0ca597a4a16f3db) (http://www.postimage.org/)
Excellent idea...
I've just ordered one of these...
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.halloweencostumes4u.com%2FMerchant2%2Fgraphics%2F00000003%2F67002.jpg&hash=0db2e6d665da4a9289905db2f5237f2a81753e88)
whistle:
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YOU BARSTEWARD evil:
scared2:
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Pimp my mask eeek:
lol:
You look different somehow rubschin:
Different T shirt ;)
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That'll be it lol:
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YOU BARSTEWARD evil:
scared2:
Ah but Miss D, that's probably the best Old Baldy has looked in years. whistle:
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but I don't like clowns ..clown masks...clown dolls....clown puppets...any clowns sad24: sad24: sad24:
I am now all of a tither noooo:
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I'm sure you can come up with some suitable form of revenge once you get to Cyprus Miss D... eveilgrin:
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Right, I propose :
1/ That all boozers should wear a mask whilst in the pub. (bagsy me the Gordon Brown mask)
2/ Anybody who sneezes into a bar towel is barred.
3/ I will cough in the face of any bastard that knocks on my door and tries to convince me to switch electricity suppliers while I am trying to post shite on here. Which someone just did.
4/ That everybody buys a bag of peanuts so that I can see the breasts of that woman on that card thing.
More emergency measures may follow. scared2:
Thank you TG, for the next 60 seconds, I will conduct a test of the VP emergency broadcast equipment. AAAAHHHHH!!! Had this been a real emergency, the scream you just heard would be followed by lots more just like it. This concludes the test of the VP emergency broadcast equipment.
Please do not panic, go about your business, this has been a public service post, there should be another along in a few minutes
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I shall wait for 6 blasts of the ship's whistle then saunter along to my muster station...
By the way, where are the muster stations in the VP? rubschin:
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Do we have any bunkers confused2:
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Questions that need answering BM
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50 "suspected" cases in the UK so far...
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Does that mean I cannot have a bacon buttie this morning?
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Questions that need answering BM
Of course we have a muster station... and bunkers like... ;D
I'll move all those boxes of crisps out of them shall I...? redface:
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Put them in the bunker...I'll need some supplies like whistle:
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Questions that need answering BM
Of course we have a muster station... and bunkers like... ;D
I'll move all those boxes of crisps out of them shall I...? redface:
I will half a mild when you have a mo. And a rub down with an oily rag would nice
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Put them in the bunker...I'll need some supplies like whistle:
That new fish 'n chip flavour one for you...?
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Crisp flavours don't count in foods of wrongness - so Fish and chip flavour crisps will be fine thank you kind Sir whistle:
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Bah! evil:
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....and while you lot merrily comtinue chortling your one liners....
http://www.naturalnews.com/026141.html
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but I don't like clowns ..clown masks...clown dolls....clown puppets...any clowns sad24: sad24: sad24:
I am now all of a tither noooo:
Not to worry Miss D, next week you will be 'all of a tether' eeek:
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but I don't like clowns ..clown masks...clown dolls....clown puppets...any clowns sad24: sad24: sad24:
I am now all of a tither noooo:
Not to worry Miss D, next week you will be 'all of a tether' eeek:
eyes:
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Not dead yet happy088
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Does brain dead count noooo:
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Does brain dead count noooo:
Depends... is it as a result of porky flu...?
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1 interview down ...14 more to go noooo:
Over 2 days I hasten to add
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1 interview down ...14 more to go noooo:
Over 2 days I hasten to add
What are you interviewing for like...?
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2 posts .... obviously it helps that at the end we have to say we are restructuring and potentially losing up to 400 positions across the Clown school but this positon should not be affected noooo:
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2 posts .... obviously it helps that at the end we have to say we are restructuring and potentially losing up to 400 positions across the Clown school but this positon should not be affected noooo:
Posts eh rubschin: I have interviewed a few planks in my time.....
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2 posts .... obviously it helps that at the end we have to say we are restructuring and potentially losing up to 400 positions across the Clown school but this positon should not be affected noooo:
Posts eh rubschin: I have interviewed a few planks in my time.....
drumroll:
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Do we have any bunkers confused2:
Depends on how deep the dents BM has been making in the floor are. At the very least we'll have foxholes. whistle:
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Do we have any bunkers confused2:
Depends on how deep the dents BM has been making in the floor are. At the very least we'll have foxholes. whistle:
I filled in all those holes.... evil:
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....and while you lot merrily comtinue chortling your one liners....
http://www.naturalnews.com/026141.html
I do love a good conspiracy theory rubschin:
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Questions that need answering BM
Of course we have a muster station... and bunkers like... ;D
I'll move all those boxes of crisps out of them shall I...? redface:
I will half a mild when you have a mo. And a rub down with an oily rag would nice
Watch that dander of yours doesn't get up.
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eeek: He's got a dander? scared2:
How do you know?
When were you told?
Is it official?
So many questions...
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Only a small one. Fear not
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....and while you lot merrily comtinue chortling your one liners....
http://www.naturalnews.com/026141.html
Outstanding!!!!! I love a conspiracy.
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....and while you lot merrily comtinue chortling your one liners....
http://www.naturalnews.com/026141.html
Outstanding!!!!! I love a conspiracy.
Brushing off the dander.
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....and while you lot merrily comtinue chortling your one liners....
http://www.naturalnews.com/026141.html
Outstanding!!!!! I love a conspiracy.
Brushing off the dander.
Now that has just got to hurt, I would opt for the wiping the 'dander' off on the curtains, surely less painfull?
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....and while you lot merrily comtinue chortling your one liners....
http://www.naturalnews.com/026141.html
Outstanding!!!!! I love a conspiracy.
Brushing off the dander.
Now that has just got to hurt, I would opt for the wiping the 'dander' off on the curtains, surely less painfull?
He probably has steel shutters on his windows. noooo:
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redface: Oh indeed, I hadn't taken into account the 'rust quotient/pain ratio'
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....and while you lot merrily comtinue chortling your one liners....
http://www.naturalnews.com/026141.html
Outstanding!!!!! I love a conspiracy.
Brushing off the dander.
Ruff?
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I see that the government's vaunted swine flu hotline has already broken. If you ring it now all you get is crackling. whistle:
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One of the signs of swine fever is rashers all over your body
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and the trots redface:
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If the puns don't start improving I can see us all for the chop.
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Apple sauce anyone?
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One of the signs of swine fever is rashers all over your body
I've got some oinkment for that.
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I'm just off to try and make a silk purse.........
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If I give you the wool ............. redface: Sorry, wrong joke.
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Snout wrong with the joke tho' ;)
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Oh, the irony ... ::)
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FaVtoVoA.jpg&hash=fcbdeeadc431c10aa76f42908e16ea8aa075391b) (http://www.postimage.org/)
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Is it now officially a hamdemic ???
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Load of Hogwash if you ask me ~ which I appreciate you didn't.
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Should I go to the doctor if I wake up tomorrow with my hair in pigtails Shrugs:
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The vet might be a better idea
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Oooh! Oooh! Level five!
Do Wilko's supply body bags I wonder? Cant expect the government to sort everything now can we? scared2:
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Mrs TMR (to be) phoned me up earlier and said "The car need petrol, but I don't want to risk getting Swine Flu by going to the petrol station".
"Daft bint", I replied, "that's Mexico, not Texaco"...
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Calm down dears ~ Gordon says that the UK is better prepared to meet this global threat than any other country ~ mind he said that about the recession too as I recall ........... Perhaps we should allow ourselves a small panic. GOS will organise one tomorrow I expect ~ unless it rains.
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Calm down dears ~ Gordon says that the UK is better prepared to meet this global threat than any other country ~ mind he said that about the recession too as I recall ........... Perhaps we should allow ourselves a small panic. GOS will organise one tomorrow I expect ~ unless it rains.
No-one is allowed to panic on my birthday evil: Except me.
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It's not in the calendar so celebrations have not been organised I'm afraid noooo:
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It's not in the calendar so celebrations have not been organised I'm afraid noooo:
Good. Celebrations are for non grumpy types.
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Oh it's not for you ...it is to give us any reason for a drink up lol:
-
So how are we all tonight? Anybody done a head count? Anyone missing?
Sniffles anyone? Uncontrollable flatulence? Not that flatulence is a symptom but its something to laugh at like.
I feel fine thanks for asking. ;)
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Oh it's not for you ...it is to give us any reason for a drink up lol:
Also the day Hitler topped himself...
-
lol:
Yer all fecking mad!
See you tomorrow and Happy Birthday TMR
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Fsmileys%2Fsmiley-greet002.gif&hash=896c9091340b4f25a712e76979aba01ed2bee825)
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lol:
Yer all fecking mad!
See you tomorrow and Happy Birthday TMR
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Fsmileys%2Fsmiley-greet002.gif&hash=896c9091340b4f25a712e76979aba01ed2bee825)
Thank you Snoops. I must now sleep, I have been consuming a "few" Young's. I wonder if, when I wake up tomorrow morning, it will be like a scene out of "28 days later"...
-
lol:
Yer all fecking mad!
See you tomorrow and Happy Birthday TMR
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Fsmileys%2Fsmiley-greet002.gif&hash=896c9091340b4f25a712e76979aba01ed2bee825)
And Miss D's last day at work for a month...
I'm buying lol: lol: lol:
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The outspoken head of Ryanair has dismissed apocalyptic warnings of a global swine flu pandemic, saying that the virus was only a risk to Asians and Mexicans “living in slums”.
Michael O’Leary told a press conference that he did not think the virus that is thought to have killed around 150 people in Mexico would wipe out his firm's business this summer despite UN warnings of a pandemic.
“Are we going to die from swine flu? No. Are we in danger of SARS? No. Foot and mouth disease? No. Will it affect people flying short-haul flights around Europe this summer? Thankfully, no," Mr O'Leary said.
He added: “It is a tragedy only for people living ... in slums in Asia or Mexico. But will the honeymoon couple from Edinburgh die? No. A couple of Strepsils will do the job.
happy001
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Calm down dears ~ Gordon says that the UK is better prepared to meet this global threat than any other country ~ mind he said that about the recession too as I recall ........... Perhaps we should allow ourselves a small panic. GOS will organise one tomorrow I expect ~ unless it rains.
I am always up for a good panic. Will there be a band?Can't have a decent panic without a band
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This bunch from the local Kebab Shop Owners Association are available and cheap ~ will they do?
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.koreatimes.co.kr%2Fupload%2Fnews%2FTurkish%2520military%2520band.jpg&hash=a5c200e1f2f8a200d6434a08a9cd83f144357262)
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Contrary to belief I have not subcummed to swine flu!
-
Calm down dears ~ Gordon says that the UK is better prepared to meet this global threat than any other country ~ mind he said that about the recession too as I recall ........... Perhaps we should allow ourselves a small panic. GOS will organise one tomorrow I expect ~ unless it rains.
I am always up for a good panic. Will there be a band?Can't have a decent panic without a band
A good panic would break the monotony here. Shall I start now or wait for level 6?
-
A report on the BBC news yesterday evening was enjoyable. A reporter was giving a breathless and dramatic account from a school in Paignton I think. As usual kids were bouncing around behind him taking the piss, one of them was wearing what appeared to be a WWII gas mask.
Well it made me larf anyway.
-
Still alive happy088
and happy birthday TMR
-
Calm down dears ~ Gordon says that the UK is better prepared to meet this global threat than any other country ~ mind he said that about the recession too as I recall ........... Perhaps we should allow ourselves a small panic. GOS will organise one tomorrow I expect ~ unless it rains.
I am always up for a good panic. Will there be a band?Can't have a decent panic without a band
A good panic would break the monotony here. Shall I start now or wait for level 6?
Start now... just in case you are dead before Level 6 like...
-
Swine Flu Hotline 0800 345 0546
Jut tried to call it but couldn’t hear a thing - too much crackling on the line…
-
Swine Flu Hotline 0800 345 0546
Jut tried to call it but couldn’t hear a thing - too much crackling on the line…
See post #32 this topic!
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That is the 1,000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 time I have heard that. Banghead
-
redface:
-
That is the 1,000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 time I have heard that. Banghead
I've told you a million times not to exaggerate. ;)
-
Swine Flu Hotline 0800 345 0546
Jut tried to call it but couldn’t hear a thing - too much crackling on the line…
Do keep up old boy, I posted that one yesteray point:
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As Snoops has already pointed out ...is no one paying attention today noooo:
-
I have a sniffle cry:
And I have to fly a lot in the next few weeks cry:
To and from Scotland eeek:
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You'll be fine...just don't wear your sombrero on the plane whistle:
-
Haggis flu?
-
You'll be fine...just don't wear you're sombrero on the plane whistle:
Hang on a minute Miss D have you thought this through properly.... Nick, several tonnes of airborne metal, are you sure that all will be fine?
-
http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/health/who-will-be-the-first-arsehole-to-wear--a-facemask?-200904291731/ (http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/health/who-will-be-the-first-arsehole-to-wear--a-facemask?-200904291731/)
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The EU's health commissioner has urged Europeans not to panic over swine flu, as ministers prepare for emergency talks on ways to contain the virus.
"We have to exercise vigilance, we should not panic, we have to be prepared," Androulla Vassiliou said.
In other words.....PANIC!!!
I'm fully expecting shop shelves to be stripped bare within a week now. ::)
Fuel crisis springs to mind.
When will these idiots learn to stf up?
-
I have a cellar whistle:
-
I have a cellar whistle:
Will it sustain 20000 pallets of bottled water, 3000 tins of baked beans, and a ton of spam? whistle:
-
And cake, don't forget cake.
-
http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/health/who-will-be-the-first-arsehole-to-wear--a-facemask?-200904291731/ (http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/health/who-will-be-the-first-arsehole-to-wear--a-facemask?-200904291731/)
happy001
-
http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/health/who-will-be-the-first-arsehole-to-wear--a-facemask?-200904291731/ (http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/health/who-will-be-the-first-arsehole-to-wear--a-facemask?-200904291731/)
Bastardo company firewall!! cussing:
-
I say chaps ~ I do believe Uncle Mort has got a new cap ~ he looks different somehow.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/index.php?action=dlattach;attach=565;type=avatar)
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Quite dapper ~ if I say so myself.
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I have a cellar whistle:
Will it sustain 20000 pallets of bottled water, 3000 tins of baked beans, and a ton of spam? whistle:
Yes whistle:
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Quite dapper ~ if I say so myself.
Dapper isn't the word. lol:
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How it all started
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FPqFMC6r.jpg&hash=5ea39c9bf375c33eb97eeef5fac35defa867ee34) (http://www.postimage.org/)
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2Fgx9MeLS.jpg&hash=e8eb9c0718d509c50d075ba500ea36df54da4054) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=gx9MeLS)
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I have a cellar whistle:
Will it sustain 20000 pallets of bottled water, 3000 tins of baked beans, and a ton of spam? whistle:
Surely that is just a normal Tesco order for Nick?
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Quite dapper ~ if I say so myself.
He looks like Harold MacMillan rubschin:
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How it all started
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FPqFMC6r.jpg&hash=5ea39c9bf375c33eb97eeef5fac35defa867ee34) (http://www.postimage.org/)
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2Fgx9MeLS.jpg&hash=e8eb9c0718d509c50d075ba500ea36df54da4054) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=gx9MeLS)
Pinky and Perky started it all? eeek:
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(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/index.php?action=dlattach;attach=565;type=avatar) (https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.thisislondon.co.uk%2Fi%2Fpix%2F2008%2F01%2F11a_16_macmillan_243x296.jpg&hash=ae468b277398d1175336a122a986a7bd43a6d34d)
CAN'T SEE IT MYSELF noooo:
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EIGHT CONFIRMED CASES IN THE UK NOW ~ According to the BBC news
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It's a pandemic, I tells ya scared2:
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BM will no doubt require all avatars to be equipped with masks eeek:
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On some that might be an improvement whistle:
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I am ready! char067
-
I shall be adjusting mine overnight, ready for level 6 whistle:
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As will I... eveilgrin:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2Fgxa51Wi.jpg&hash=ea8fdff93375633c47f8143b676c4c268479b45c) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=gxa51Wi)
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(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/index.php?action=dlattach;attach=566;type=avatar)
lol: lol: lol: lol:
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Get you two - flash gits lol:
I will not be gagged whistle:
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Is Swine Fever level 5 and harder than Call of Duty level 4?
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Is Swine Fever level 5 and harder than Call of Duty level 4?
Yes... but not Max Payne... noooo:
-
Get you two - flash gits lol:
I will not be gagged whistle:
We'll see... eyes:
-
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FPqIiJPA.jpg&hash=bb4d963c86dbd3c1623c3a764ecad8abb62177ac) (http://www.postimage.org/)
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happy001 happy001
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Richard Littlejohn
Who ya gonna call: Flu-busters?
The health-scare ‘experts’ are having a field day with their Doomsday predictions.
One virologist, on the basis of precisely nothing, said swine flu could become crossed with bird flu and mutate into an ‘ Armageddon’ strain.
I suppose we’d have to call that ‘flying pig flu’.
Meanwhile, every family in Britain is being sent a leaflet on how to cope with swine flu.
Why? What a complete waste of time and money. We’re capable of reading the papers.
Is there anyone in the country who isn’t aware of this alleged pandemic?
This patronising pamphlet tells us to remember to wash our hands, and to ring our doctor if we experience ’flu-like symptoms.
Who else do they think we’re going to call? The AA? Ghostbusters?
Anyway, this mailshot won’t start landing on doormats until the middle of next week — by which time anyone with swine flu will either have died or, much more likely, got better.
It’s right that the Government stockpiles anti-flu drugs. But spare us the wasteful, infantile ‘advice’.
Here’s another tip. If you do contract swine flu, you can always use this ludicrous leaflet as a hankie.
razz:
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As much I don't like to agree with Littlejohn. happy088
(still alive happy088)
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We need to form a survivors support group - perhaps we can apply for government funding - we are, after all, a diverse enough bunch to hit most of the 'needy' criteria whistle:
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Morning all. I have not succumbed yet, although I do feel a tad jaded this morning surrender:
-
Morning all. I have not succumbed yet, although I do feel a tad jaded this morning surrender:
Keep away then! scared2:
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Morning all. I have not succumbed yet, although I do feel a tad jaded this morning surrender:
Keep away then! scared2:
Self inflicted, BM. redface:
After a "few" Young's, we went for dinner at http://www.lerajrestaurant.co.uk/Scripts/homepage.asp
Fanbloodytastic!
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Morning all. I have not succumbed yet, although I do feel a tad jaded this morning surrender:
Keep away then! scared2:
Self inflicted, BM. redface:
After a "few" Young's, we went for dinner at http://www.lerajrestaurant.co.uk/Scripts/homepage.asp
Fanbloodytastic!
Ah... booze related jaded... thass all right then... hair of the dog...?
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We need to form a survivors support group - perhaps we can apply for government funding - we are, after all, a diverse enough bunch to hit most of the 'needy' criteria whistle:
I am up for that, will we have a band? You cant have a proper support group without a band.
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We need to form a survivors support group - perhaps we can apply for government funding - we are, after all, a diverse enough bunch to hit most of the 'needy' criteria whistle:
I am up for that, will we have a band? You cant have a proper support group without a band.
Yes GOS, we can have a band... ::)
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Outstanding! Now about the uniform.....
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Outstanding! Now about the uniform.....
eeek:
Is that entirely necessary ???
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Outstanding! Now about the uniform.....
I think you look rather dapper in your fatigues and gas mask...
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Outstanding! Now about the uniform.....
eeek:
Is that entirely necessary ???
Well yes, the memsahibs love a lad in a uniform
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Outstanding! Now about the uniform.....
I think you look rather dapper in your fatigues and gas mask...
Fatigues? Bloody fatigues! It's bloody battle dress. I bet you were in the Flying Corp rubschin:
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Outstanding! Now about the uniform.....
I think you look rather dapper in your fatigues and gas mask...
Fatigues? Bloody fatigues! It's bloody battle dress. I bet you were in the Flying Corp rubschin:
I'm too young... redface:
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Outstanding! Now about the uniform.....
eeek:
Is that entirely necessary ???
Well yes, the memsahibs love a lad in a uniform
Depends which sort surely rubschin:
Some uniforms are much more preferable than others eyes:
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Outstanding! Now about the uniform.....
I think you look rather dapper in your fatigues and gas mask...
Fatigues? Bloody fatigues! It's bloody battle dress. I bet you were in the Flying Corp rubschin:
No we didn't have "fatigues" either ~ at least not to wear. BM has been watching too many American "We won the War" films. The Yanks are the only outfit that call their battle dress "fatigues" ~ mainly, I have long suspected, because they don't like to get their pretty uniforms dirty.
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http://timesnews.typepad.com/news/2009/05/the-sound-of-swine-flu-and-its-not-coughing.html?OTC-widgets&ATTR=tolblogs
Electric organs, sombre synths and a variety of syncopated drum rythyms.
This is the song of swine flu, according to musician Stephan Zielinski who has strung up the virus's two key proteins to make an algorithm that can be listened to.
Now why on earth didn't I think of doing this. ::)
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http://timesnews.typepad.com/news/2009/05/the-sound-of-swine-flu-and-its-not-coughing.html?OTC-widgets&ATTR=tolblogs
Electric organs, sombre synths and a variety of syncopated drum rythyms.
This is the song of swine flu, according to musician Stephan Zielinski who has strung up the virus's two key proteins to make an algorithm that can be listened to.
Now why on earth didn't I think of doing this. ::)
;D
-
If I click on the link that says "Listen Here" will my 'puter get the virus?
-
WHAT ARE THE SYMPTOMS?
Some of the symptoms are the sudden onset of fever, cough or shortness of breath. Other symptoms can include headache, sore throat, tiredness, aching muscles, chills, sneezing, runny nose or loss of appetite.
Wenchy is a goner (except for the loss of appetite bit, obviuosly) noooo:
-
If I click on the link that says "Listen Here" will my 'puter get the virus?
drumroll: Undoubtedly...
-
If I click on the link that says "Listen Here" will my 'puter get the virus?
Almost certainly....
-
Cyber flu? OMG we're doomed. scared2:
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It had to happen
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi20.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fb236%2Ftafmad%2Fcid_0E7EE49A-0966-4124-B08B-4650C04.jpg&hash=2e0d2e5102ff1b879a60791adf37355d1d187979)
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It had to happen
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi20.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fb236%2Ftafmad%2Fcid_0E7EE49A-0966-4124-B08B-4650C04.jpg&hash=2e0d2e5102ff1b879a60791adf37355d1d187979)
See also... oh I can't be arsed to look for it now... noooo:
Well done GOS... whistle:
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He is trying to keep up, poor chap noooo:
-
He is trying to keep up, poor chap noooo:
Indeed... 'tis the flu see... noooo:
-
Shit!!! Banghead
-
And how is Brummagem? Frightful when I was last there noooo:
-
Shit!!! Banghead
Tis your gas mask obscuring your vision I 'spec... whistle:
-
All still well then? I have a pain in my knee, could this be swine flu related?
It may inconvenience me when I try to run around in circles screaming in panic when we reach level 6.
sad24:
-
GOUT!
-
Nah. Don't think so.
Just as an aside I had my hair cut this morning. When I got home and looked at myself in the mirror I thought that if I put on a boiler suit and stood bolt upright, and my face were completely different, and it was really dark then I would be a dead ringer for Hannibal Lecter.
Just thought I would mention it. whistle:
-
It's in the dead eyes scared2:
-
It's in the dead eyes scared2:
rubschin:
I just had another look. Nope, not dead eyes.
Half of Mrs TG's family have often pointed out the resemblance to Harold Shipman. The other half reckon some other bloke who's name escapes me at present. Some actor bloke.
Back on topic : ...er. I am still not dead, witness the fact that I am posting shite.
-
The new avatars with masks is really disturbing me.....
I don't know who anyone is anymore cry:
-
It's in the dead eyes scared2:
rubschin:
I just had another look. Nope, not dead eyes.
Half of Mrs TG's family have often pointed out the resemblance to Harold Shipman. The other half reckon some other bloke who's name escapes me at present. Some actor bloke.
Back on topic : ...er. I am still not dead, witness the fact that I am posting shite.
You will be soon, don't worry... noooo:
I wonder if I should move this to The Medical Centre...? rubschin:
-
It's in the dead eyes scared2:
rubschin:
I just had another look. Nope, not dead eyes.
Half of Mrs TG's family have often pointed out the resemblance to Harold Shipman. The other half reckon some other bloke who's name escapes me at present. Some actor bloke.
Back on topic : ...er. I am still not dead, witness the fact that I am posting shite.
You will be soon, don't worry... noooo:
I wonder if I should move this to The Medical Centre...? rubschin:
Indeed, lets add to the confusion! ;)
-
And how is Brummagem? Frightful when I was last there noooo:
It's fine here Nick but I am not living on the front line eyes:
-
The new avatars with masks is really disturbing me.....
I don't know who anyone is anymore cry:
I am the good looking one, you can recognise me easily, I am wearing a red carnation and carrying a copy of the Times, the password is, the brown pig is poorly
-
.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FPqLGWNS.jpg&hash=6a0d35f495118a1b246a6e11463be5144a78acf0) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=PqLGWNS)
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drumroll:
-
.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FPqLGWNS.jpg&hash=6a0d35f495118a1b246a6e11463be5144a78acf0) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=PqLGWNS)
See also: http://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/index.php?topic=4089.msg144312#new
point:
-
But leaving that aside I see the Mexicans are now revising the numbers killed by this deadly "new" virus downwards ~ presumably the dead are walking again. Clearly it pays to get ill in a Catholic country ::)
-
But leaving that aside I see the Mexicans are now revising the numbers killed by this deadly "new" virus downwards ~ presumably the dead are walking again. Clearly it pays to get ill in a Catholic country ::)
Indeed... only 105 now...
Single figures after Sunday worship prolly... noooo:
-
Are the Ayrabs still claiming that the swine flu is punishment on the infidels from Allah and that musliims will not get swine flue because they don't eat pork?
Have the been any reported cases in the Arab world?
-
Are the Ayrabs still claiming that the swine flu is punishment on the infidels from Allah and that musliims will not get swine flue because they don't eat pork?
Have the been any reported cases in the Arab world?
No, they've renamed it 'Hallal Flu'... whistle:
-
Still alive happy088
-
Still alive happy088
Not even a slight cough, tickley throat or sniffles...?
-
Nope. Much overrated these pandemic thingies are.
-
Nope. Much overrated these pandemic thingies are.
Bah! All money on GOS then...? rubschin:
-
I have a stiff neck this morning, do you think I have the flu?
Perhaps the Viagra bow-tie was a mistake. rubschin:
-
Are the Ayrabs still claiming that the swine flu is punishment on the infidels from Allah and that musliims will not get swine flue because they don't eat pork?
Have the been any reported cases in the Arab world?
No, they've renamed it 'Hallal Flu'... whistle:
Funny you should mention that. Israel is refusing to call their snoutbreak swine flu as pigs arent kosher. lol:
-
Still alive happy088
-
I am going to burn my gas mask in protest!
Not so much as a sniffle let alone piles of corpses. noooo:
-
I know ~ very disappointing.
If only - Linky (http://bouncewith.me.uk/europe/8027043.htm)
-
I know ~ very disappointing.
If only - Linky (http://bouncewith.me.uk/europe/8027043.htm)
happy088
"recipes for brain finger foods" cloud9:
Shame really, I am really good at fighting zombies.
-
"If you feel yourself passing away, then notice your strength and vigor returning at an alarming rate, please attempt to restrain yourself to prevent infection and harm to others."
;D
-
They've shut a school near me... rubschin: .... scared2:
-
Well it is quite late in the afternoon and lessons have finished.
-
doh:
Latest Update Tuesday 5th May 11.15 a.m.
PLEASE NOTE:
We will be using this web site to update parents and pupils on the situation and to give details of re-arranged exams (see below), how pupils can receive work to study at home this week and about any school events which we are trying to re-schedule.
As the School community will be aware, we were informed yesterday, Monday 4th May, that 6 pupils had been tested and confirmed as having influenza A type H1N1. We acted immediately working to instructions from the Health Protection Agency (HPA), in consultation with the Director of Public Health in Southwark, to close the School up to and including Sunday 10th May, cancelling all associated events (the Year 7 Parents' Evening scheduled for this evening has been cancelled). We have been told by the HPA to plan for business as usual next week after this 7 day closure.
Our priority yesterday was to arrange for all parents to be given a one-to-one medical consultation with an HPA medical practitioner (a team of GPs and nurses) and then purely as a precaution to be offered, with medical advice, preventative antiviral medication (Tamiflu) for pupils at the School. Similarly, we have offered such medication to all employees.
Yesterday evening more than 90% of Senior School parents collected the medication being offered by the HPA. The remaining Senior School parents and the Junior School parents are being invited in this afternoon (timings given below) to receive medical advice and to be offered Tamiflu for their children.
Plus, the concert I was intending to go to next week in the area might be cancelled cry:
-
Overreaction as usual ::)
I'm still alive happy088
-
Overreaction as usual ::)
I'm still alive happy088
How can we be sure you aren't a ghost writer? whistle:
I think that we should send Nick round to check up on you...
-
Now we have a swine flu tsar ::)
BBC Link (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8035121.stm)
-
I notice his remit is only for England though whistle:
-
Now we have a swine flu tsar ::)
BBC Link (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8035121.stm)
Banghead
-
Just opened a jiffy bag from Mother Wench. Oh good I think wonder what delights she has sent. Antibactirial gel in travel sizes. Banghead
-
Are you supposed to eat it or what? rubschin:
-
Apparently it is to carry on my bag and use after getting off the train and touching supermarket trolley handles. ::) Swine flu panic has landed chez Wench family. ::)
-
Carry a tank and a nozzle and spray everyone within six feet of you at all times. You know it makes sense
-
I found the tourettes impression is pretty good at keeping all away from me on public transport. redface:
-
Which reminds me...........
-
rubschin:
-
Which reminds me...........
Popcorn:
-
Which reminds me...........
Popcorn:
You might as well order the sixteen course lunch if you plan to wait for him to remember whatever it was he was going to say. ::)
-
I have to order some train tickets. That's all noooo:
-
Well you remembered an hour ago ~ done it yet? noooo:
-
Just getting onto it now boss!
-
doh:
-
Be fair Snoop, he had to remember HOW to order the tickets next. whistle:
-
Anyway, call me an optimist but I have taken my gas mask off and stored the body bags in the attic.
Pandemic, my arse! noooo:
-
I found the tourettes impression is pretty good at keeping all away from me on public transport. redface:
Oh, so it's not just me that does that then cloud9:
-
As far as I can tell everyone in London does it evil:
-
As far as I can tell everyone in London does it evil:
Wenchy and I are in Surrey whistle:
-
As far as I can tell everyone in London does it evil:
Wenchy and I are in Surrey whistle:
Ah yes ~ the old elastic borders again. Tell them they live in London and they'll tell you they live in Surrey "Miles from London" but say something nice about London living and bugger me if they don't all turn out to live there. ::)
London can be defined many ways but as far as I am concerned it is either within the "square mile" and is The City of London or it is within the M25 and thus part of Greater London. Anything else is not London at all.
-
They live in London noooo:
-
As far as I can tell everyone in London does it evil:
Wenchy and I are in Surrey whistle:
Ah yes ~ the old elastic borders again. Tell them they live in London and they'll tell you they live in Surrey "Miles from London" but say something nice about London living and bugger me if they don't all turn out to live there. ::)
London can be defined many ways but as far as I am concerned it is either within the "square mile" and is The City of London or it is within the M25 and thus part of Greater London. Anything else is not London at all.
Oh, do you know him too? point:
-
Yes, he changed sex and went to Lincoln!
-
As far as I can tell everyone in London does it evil:
Wenchy and I are in Surrey whistle:
Ah yes ~ the old elastic borders again. Tell them they live in London and they'll tell you they live in Surrey "Miles from London" but say something nice about London living and bugger me if they don't all turn out to live there. ::)
London can be defined many ways but as far as I am concerned it is either within the "square mile" and is The City of London or it is within the M25 and thus part of Greater London. Anything else is not London at all.
Oh, do you know him too? point:
::) Yes ~ several of him
-
As far as I can tell everyone in London does it evil:
Wenchy and I are in Surrey whistle:
Ah yes ~ the old elastic borders again. Tell them they live in London and they'll tell you they live in Surrey "Miles from London" but say something nice about London living and bugger me if they don't all turn out to live there. ::)
London can be defined many ways but as far as I am concerned it is either within the "square mile" and is The City of London or it is within the M25 and thus part of Greater London. Anything else is not London at all.
Oh, do you know him too? point:
happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001
And for the record I never say I live in London to anyone that has any vague idea that England consists of far more.
-
As far as I can tell everyone in London does it evil:
Wenchy and I are in Surrey whistle:
Ah yes ~ the old elastic borders again. Tell them they live in London and they'll tell you they live in Surrey "Miles from London" but say something nice about London living and bugger me if they don't all turn out to live there. ::)
London can be defined many ways but as far as I am concerned it is either within the "square mile" and is The City of London or it is within the M25 and thus part of Greater London. Anything else is not London at all.
Oh, do you know him too? point:
happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001
And for the record I never say I live in London to anyone that has any vague idea that England consists of far more.
Well said Wenchy, you can join the SPF - I'll send enrolment forms.
(Surrey Popular Front)
-
Surrey north of Dorking is London evil:
-
As far as I can tell everyone in London does it evil:
Wenchy and I are in Surrey whistle:
Ah yes ~ the old elastic borders again. Tell them they live in London and they'll tell you they live in Surrey "Miles from London" but say something nice about London living and bugger me if they don't all turn out to live there. ::)
London can be defined many ways but as far as I am concerned it is either within the "square mile" and is The City of London or it is within the M25 and thus part of Greater London. Anything else is not London at all.
Oh, do you know him too? point:
happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001 happy001
And for the record I never say I live in London to anyone that has any vague idea that England consists of far more.
Well said Wenchy, you can join the SPF - I'll send enrolment forms.
(Surrey Popular Front)
happy088
-
Surrey north of Dorking is London evil:
Five miles (from London) south of Dorking is West Sussex. Are you implying Surrey is merely a "ribbon" of a county? rubschin:
-
Surrey north of Dorking is London evil:
Possibly Greater London but not London London! It is only London London if it is on a tube line. At least that is the way we've always worked it.
Dorking is not London, neither is Epsom, Ewell, Cheam, Sutton, Wallington or Raynes Park etc Just because the trains terminate at Victoria/Waterloo does NOT MAKE THEM LONDON!
-
London noooo:
-
::)
-
Whatever! tunble:
I note that many employees in that area are happy to claim "London Weighting" in addition to their salary
-
redface:
-
point:
-
Whatever! tunble:
I note that many employees in that area are happy to claim "London Weighting" in addition to their salary
"Locational allowance", dear boy. "London Weighting" is such an old-fashioned term whistle: The South East (which includes Surrey) is the most expensive part of these isles in which to live, probably because we have roofs on our houses, running water and electricity 8)
-
And just to rub it in Wenchy's address is on page 131 of my LONDON AtoZ
QED
-
You sad bastard you went to look that up didn't you! lol:
-
Snoopy won
-
You sad bastard you went to look that up didn't you! lol:
happy001 happy001 happy001
-
You sad bastard you went to look that up didn't you! lol:
Well TBF I only had to reach behind me to the bookcase but yes I did look it up. ;)
-
Anyhoo. Has everyone had their stoopid leaflet yet?
-
You sad bastard you went to look that up didn't you! lol:
Well TBF I only had to reach behind me to the bookcase but yes I did look it up. ;)
Are you sure that was the A to Z and not the "Lamposts of London (and surrounds) - the travelling hound''s invaluable guide" ?
-
Anyhoo. Has everyone had their stoopid leaflet yet?
noooo:
-
Anyhoo. Has everyone had their stoopid leaflet yet?
Nope ~ nary a sign of one here but perhaps they are only sending them out in Engerland.
-
Probably just London.
-
Where's that?
-
And parts of SUrrey
-
And Middlesex plus lumps of Essex and Kent
-
In my part of Surrey we haven't had them as yet.
Although a leaflet was handed out at school.
-
Maybe you just don't have enough Mexicans
-
Maybe you just don't have enough Mexicans
http://restaurants.lacartes.com/restaurant/mexican/surrey/cheam-village/el-torito-141.html
Surely one is enough per town in Surrey?
-
That is now a Pizza Express. Apparently the rats are still there though.
-
That is now a Pizza Express. Apparently the rats are still there though.
Nowt wrong with vermin vermicelli...
-
Add ketchup! happy088
-
sick2:
-
Or SALAD
-
Surrey north of Dorking is London evil:
Possibly Greater London but not London London! It is only London London if it is on a tube line. At least that is the way we've always worked it.
Dorking is not London, neither is Epsom, Ewell, Cheam, Sutton, Wallington or Raynes Park etc Just because the trains terminate at Victoria/Waterloo does NOT MAKE THEM LONDON!
Amersham then...? rubschin:
-
May 11. Still no leaflet ::)
"... urgently, to every household in the land... " ::)
-
Got mine Saturday ~ must read it sometime.
-
May 11. Still no leaflet ::)
"... urgently, to every household in the land... " ::)
I haven' t got one either...wonder what it says noooo:
-
Got mine Saturday ~ must read it sometime.
I wouldn't... some bastard at the printers prolly sneezed all over it... noooo:
-
May 11. Still no leaflet ::)
"... urgently, to every household in the land... " ::)
I haven' t got one either...wonder what it says noooo:
Apparently Gordo is having 2 versions printed and its taking longer than planned to get the ones designed for people who will vote him out next year even though it only has 1 instruction:
"Cover head with plastic bag".
-
Got mine today.
It seems I am not going to die in a pool of snot anytime soon.
I can order the leaflet on audio tape if I have gone blind, also in a welsh version. After all, most welsh speakers cant speak English can they?
-
Have a bit of a sniffle and sore throat this morning. eeek:
-
Have a bit of a sniffle and sore throat this morning. eeek:
happy100
Did you eat Mexican last night rubschin:
-
I had a bag of chilli flavoured Doritos. rubschin:
-
Have a bit of a sniffle and sore throat this morning. eeek:
I tole you! It was that leaflet.... scared2:
-
I had a bag of chilli flavoured Doritos. rubschin:
The VP doctor would recommend that you take some time off work and take a short break....without the pocket drainers of course 8) . This will of course all be funded by the Government as they are being extremely generous at the moment and no un/reasonable offer is refused.
Send us a postcard lol:
-
http://uk.news.yahoo.com/5/20090511/tuk-brits-in-egypt-held-at-gunpoint-over-45dbed5.html (http://uk.news.yahoo.com/5/20090511/tuk-brits-in-egypt-held-at-gunpoint-over-45dbed5.html)
Stewart Harbut, his pregnant wife Sasha, and their four young children claim they were "pinned down" at Sharm El Shiek International Hospital while doctors forced them to give swabs.
The family had earlier been bundled into the back of van and driven from Sharm El Shiek airport to the hospital with a full police escort.
When Mr Harbut, an engineer, tried to leave the hospital after being kept in a "filthy" isolation unit overnight he was confronted by three armed guards who blocked his way.
Tests eventually confirmed that none of the family had the infection.
Speaking from their Red Sea resort hotel after being "released" Mr Harbut, 37, said he had been treated like a drug smuggler.
He said travellers should be warned about the level of panic in Egypt, a country which plans to kill all of its 300,000 pigs, against World Health Organisation advice.
I am going there in July scared2:
-
http://uk.news.yahoo.com/5/20090511/tuk-brits-in-egypt-held-at-gunpoint-over-45dbed5.html (http://uk.news.yahoo.com/5/20090511/tuk-brits-in-egypt-held-at-gunpoint-over-45dbed5.html)
Stewart Harbut, his pregnant wife Sasha, and their four young children claim they were "pinned down" at Sharm El Shiek International Hospital while doctors forced them to give swabs.
The family had earlier been bundled into the back of van and driven from Sharm El Shiek airport to the hospital with a full police escort.
When Mr Harbut, an engineer, tried to leave the hospital after being kept in a "filthy" isolation unit overnight he was confronted by three armed guards who blocked his way.
Tests eventually confirmed that none of the family had the infection.
Speaking from their Red Sea resort hotel after being "released" Mr Harbut, 37, said he had been treated like a drug smuggler.
He said travellers should be warned about the level of panic in Egypt, a country which plans to kill all of its 300,000 pigs, against World Health Organisation advice.
I am going there in July scared2:
Don't sneeze! point:
-
Or wear this T shirt lol:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.oneposter.com%2FUserData%2FPoster%2FPoster_32848.jpg&hash=08373c5c12347719524c3a791b71f4de6f107a83)
-
I am going there in July scared2:
Hmm hordes of armed guards vs jetlagged Miss D....
They don't stand a chance. lol:
-
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FPq24kNM9.jpg&hash=d5ac38cee68ab3931b1c02ebfe77a7fa41f0c737) (http://www.postimage.org/)
-
Still no leaflet noooo:
I must be immune angel1
-
No, it's more likely the hooge X painted on your front door
-
The one's either side don't help either lol:
-
I'd forgotten about the death flu... is it safe to come over next week...? scared2:
-
Safe for us noooo:
Safe for you - it's fine - just bring lots of jumpers - your biggest risk is man flu 8)
-
Safe for us noooo:
Safe for you - it's fine - just bring lots of jumpers - your biggest risk is man flu 8)
I just checked the forecast...
29 and sunny here...
17 and pizeing in Windsor...
rubschin:
-
Are you sure there wasn't a minus in front of that 17 (to take account of the legendary wind chill factor)
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.theage.com.au%2Fffximage%2F2007%2F01%2F12%2Fstorm_wideweb__470x329%2C0.jpg&hash=c20508f761b1fb67f00b6bdb739ab0faa0f6ef86)
-
Are you sure there wasn't a minus in front of that 17 (to take account of the legendary wind chill factor)
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.theage.com.au%2Fffximage%2F2007%2F01%2F12%2Fstorm_wideweb__470x329%2C0.jpg&hash=c20508f761b1fb67f00b6bdb739ab0faa0f6ef86)
I shall lay in the sun tomorrow and burn myself to a crisp... that'll keep me warm for the next couple of weeks... cloud9:
-
noooo: noooo: noooo:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fjbwarehouse.blogspot.com%2Fuploaded_images%2Fsunburn-799322.jpg&hash=d61cddc602b7ef8653557a55eea5a8f7697e5157)
-
Bring rocks.
-
Bring rocks.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F2.bp.blogspot.com%2F_3KIJt17keOY%2FR6gpXha1_bI%2FAAAAAAAAAns%2FUK_C7E-24I8%2Fs320%2Flife_of_brian.jpg&hash=5428ee67be52515df07d3de92fc3443613ed74ca)
-
Bring rocks.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F2.bp.blogspot.com%2F_3KIJt17keOY%2FR6gpXha1_bI%2FAAAAAAAAAns%2FUK_C7E-24I8%2Fs320%2Flife_of_brian.jpg&hash=5428ee67be52515df07d3de92fc3443613ed74ca)
lol: lol: lol:
-
Um, back on topic like, I have been feeling a bit off for a day or three.
I have, after all, been to Scotland and on a hairyplane at that.
I went here. It's the Swine Flu Checker
http://www.nhsdirect.nhs.uk/Sat/Topics/WizardStepOne.aspx?Host=Nhsd&SyndicationPartnerGuid=d19370ea-a100-407d-9695-b73407f701c7&TopicGuid=8c903315-a302-412a-bfae-9cb576d4b4cd (http://www.nhsdirect.nhs.uk/Sat/Topics/WizardStepOne.aspx?Host=Nhsd&SyndicationPartnerGuid=d19370ea-a100-407d-9695-b73407f701c7&TopicGuid=8c903315-a302-412a-bfae-9cb576d4b4cd)
I answered the questions and was told in HUGE red letters to dial 999 immediately scared2:
Would someone else care to follow the linky and see what they get told?
-
Um, back on topic like, I have been feeling a bit off for a day or three.
I have, after all, been to Scotland and on a hairyplane at that.
I went here. It's the Swine Flu Checker
http://www.nhsdirect.nhs.uk/Sat/Topics/WizardStepOne.aspx?Host=Nhsd&SyndicationPartnerGuid=d19370ea-a100-407d-9695-b73407f701c7&TopicGuid=8c903315-a302-412a-bfae-9cb576d4b4cd (http://www.nhsdirect.nhs.uk/Sat/Topics/WizardStepOne.aspx?Host=Nhsd&SyndicationPartnerGuid=d19370ea-a100-407d-9695-b73407f701c7&TopicGuid=8c903315-a302-412a-bfae-9cb576d4b4cd)
I answered the questions and was told in HUGE red letters to dial 999 immediately scared2:
Would someone else care to follow the linky and see what they get told?
I just checked it too! eeek:
It said...
Nick should dial 999 immediately! point:
-
scared2:
-
I'm not clicking it....they will probably be able to trace me and then put me in solitary confinement in a pink boiler suit eeek:
-
The NHS in Scotland has a different Swine Flu Checker. I tried that.
It told me to dial 999 too!!! eeek:
-
I'm not clicking it....they will probably be able to trace me and then put me in solitary confinement in a pink boiler suit eeek:
rubschin:
-
Good Luck Nick ~ See you in a week or two ............... They only run a few tests ....... anal probes and such like I 'spect, and if you are all clear they'll let you go home again. 'Course if they start feeding you acorns or apple sauce you know you've had it like.
-
It's a stoopid test.. They ask you if you have visited any countries on a list. 'United Kingdom' is one ::) Well of course I have, I fooking live here. ::)
THen one of a list of symptoms. Headache and suchlike.
Then it's all DIAL 999 NOW!!
-
It's the anal probe you don't fancy isn't it? ~ You are silly, it's only a little prick.
-
That's what they said last time scared2:
-
It's the anal probe you don't fancy isn't it? ~ You are silly, it's only a little prick.
drumroll: lol: lol: lol:
-
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8054476.stm (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8054476.stm)
Fourteen new cases of swine flu have been confirmed in England, the Health Protection Agency has said
How many times did you click on that site yesterday Nick rubschin:
-
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8054476.stm (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8054476.stm)
Fourteen new cases of swine flu have been confirmed in England, the Health Protection Agency has said
How many times did you click on that site yesterday Nick rubschin:
I was thinking that... lol:
Every time Nick got the 'Dial 999' response the counter clicked up one! point:
-
I feel a bit better today. It might have been a mild case. Oink
-
I feel a bit better today. It might have been a mild case. Oink
Was it wine fever then rubschin:
-
I took a couple of codeine pills I had left over from Donna days. Wonderful dreams eyes: cloud9:
-
Have you analysed their meanings ...what does it tell you Popcorn:
-
I can't remember them now like, but jolly realistic!
-
Check the sheets!
-
Check the sheets!
Is that like reading the tea leaves lol:
-
evil:
-
Check the sheets!
Is that like reading the tea leaves lol:
Tea leaves show the future. Stains on sheets show the history. whistle:
-
Check the sheets!
Is that like reading the tea leaves lol:
Tea leaves show the future. Stains on sheets show the history. whistle:
Tea leaves on sheets show Parkinsons.
-
Check the sheets!
Is that like reading the tea leaves lol:
Tea leaves show the future. Stains on sheets show the history. whistle:
Tea leaves on sheets show Parkinsons.
What about those on my keyboard cussing:
-
Check the sheets!
Is that like reading the tea leaves lol:
Tea leaves show the future. Stains on sheets show the history. whistle:
Tea leaves on sheets show Parkinsons.
What about those on my keyboard cussing:
Earl Grey Tourettes syndrome I expect.
-
lol: lol: lol: ;)
-
Check the sheets!
Is that like reading the tea leaves lol:
Tea leaves show the future. Stains on sheets show the history. whistle:
or fear of the future rubschin:
-
Indeed!
-
A circular e-mail I received, better than average I thought. .
2007 - Chinese year of the Chicken - Bird Flu Pandemic devastates parts of
Asia
2008 - Chinese year of the Horse - Equine Influenza decimates Australian
racing
2009 - Chinese year of the Pig - Swine Flu Pandemic kills hundreds of pigs
around the globe.
Has any one else noticed this?
It gets worse........
next year......
2010 - Chinese year of the Cock - what could possibly go wrong?
-
Hopefully the dickhead pandemic will be most effective lol:
-
Hopefully the dickhead pandemic will be most effective lol:
sad24: sad32: sad24: sad32:
You don't love me any more. noooo:
-
Hopefully the dickhead pandemic will be most effective lol:
sad24: sad32: sad24: sad32:
You don't love me any more. noooo:
I would never ...ever ..ever ...put you in this category my darling DS cloud9:
-
Lower then? Popcorn:
-
Hopefully the dickhead pandemic will be most effective lol:
sad24: sad32: sad24: sad32:
You don't love me any more. noooo:
I would never ...ever ..ever ...put you in this category my darling DS cloud9:
redface: redface: redface: redface: redface:
-
I caught Cock Flu once.......Oxytetracycline is what you need to clear it up, after a fortnight I could piss straight again whatimage:
The Daw
-
I smote him spider:
-
I smote him spider:
smote ya back whistle:
The Daw
-
Likewise.
My smiting is beyond bother spider:
-
noooo:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fweblogs.newsday.com%2Fsports%2Fcolumnists%2Fjimbaumbach%2Fblog%2Fboys-fighting-cartoon.jpg&hash=9723bf68a7a20c73435259e59dc5d29d90bc10f4)
-
Also smoted eveilgrin:
-
I see Nick's Karma rating stands at an impressive -496! eeek:
-
And yours, now. at 4
-
I've lost one today ...what the feck have I done Shrugs:
-
It's Nick, he's feeling smitish. Perhaps that should be added to his symptoms poll whistle:
-
Not me, guv. She must have an enemy rubschin:
-
An emeny you say? whistle:
-
Not me, guv. She must have an emeny rubschin:
eeek:
sad24: sad24: sad24:
-
No, have you come over all queer or summat?
-
An emeny you say? whistle:
Not you surely sad24:
-
Moi? angel1
-
What is it with all this smotage... is it a symptom of oink-flu? rubschin:
-
-44 point:
-
I av not done nuffink to no one and yet still I av bin whacked.
Is this internet bullying rubschin:
-
-44 point:
-497! point: point: point:
-
The number of confirmed swine flu cases in the world has passed the 10,000 mark for the first time, the World Health Organisation has announced.
The exact known total has risen to 10,243, in 40 different countries, including 80 deaths
And still no leaflet for Miss D whistle:
-
I haven't got one either and when I do I am going to send it back and ask for one in Welsh as the Welsh Language Act entitles me to. eveilgrin:
-
I haven't got one either and when I do I am going to send it back and ask for one in Welsh as the Welsh Language Act entitles me to. eveilgrin:
You'd only chew it up when it came through the letterbox no matter what language it was in whistle:
-
Moi? angel1
-
Still alive happy088
-
Still alive happy088
Thank Goodness cloud9:
-
I've not had one either. Do you think this a way of culling non-labour voters? rubschin:
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbt_PuVAVTU (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbt_PuVAVTU)
-
Mrs TG has a cold (so she says!) she didn't take kindly to me approaching her with a tape measure in one hand and a copy of the 'Body-Bags-R-us' catalogue in the other.
No sense of humour these scousers. noooo:
-
She ought to try the Swine Flu checklist ;D
Save time, dial 999 now!
-
Man in hospital in critical condition in Glasgow ....suspected Swine Flu scared2:
-
Nick has recently been in Glasgow scared2:.
PHEW! Good job he isn't coming to Epsom.
-
And he has been diagnosed by t'internet Swine Flu hotline as requiring immediate attention rubschin:
Where is he off to next - should we forewarn them ?
-
Inverness apparently ~ I've already told him the four and twenty virgins are no longer there but will he listen?
Forewarn them? rubschin: .................. Nah, they're only Scots.
-
Aren't Glaswegians the least healthiest people in the UK?
Anyway, 184 confirmed cases in how many weeks? This swine flu doesn't seem to be able to spread very easily.
-
Bacon sales have dropped off tho'
-
Bacon sales have dropped off tho'
Which only goes to prove the utter stupidity of so many people.
-
Bacon sales have dropped off tho'
Which only goes to prove the utter stupidity of so many people.
Indeed but one only has to look at what one remark by Edwina Curry did to the egg industry.
-
Aren't Glaswegians the least healthiest people in the UK?
Anyway, 184 confirmed cases in how many weeks? This swine flu doesn't seem to be able to spread very easily.
Apparently it is going to become more popular in the Winter months.
-
I think 'popular' might be the wrong word.
-
I think 'popular' might be the wrong word.
lol: lol: lol: My thoughts entirely Unc!
-
If your name is on it ..........................
It's Miss Piggy I worry about.
-
Aren't Glaswegians the least healthiest people in the UK?
Anyway, 184 confirmed cases in how many weeks? This swine flu doesn't seem to be able to spread very easily.
Apparently it is going to become more popular in the Winter months.
About the same time as 'normal ' flu then rubschin:
-
My grandma died of flu sad24:
-
Aren't Glaswegians the least healthiest people in the UK?
Anyway, 184 confirmed cases in how many weeks? This swine flu doesn't seem to be able to spread very easily.
Apparently it is going to become more popular in the Winter months.
About the same time as 'normal ' flu then rubschin:
Exactly!
-
If it helps at all The THW has been coughing and sneezing all over the place for three days ~ now I have a tight chest, spore throat etc.
All the symptoms of a "Spring cold".
I will now say sorry in advance to all those who will be meeting me on Friday for any and all infections you may walk away with.
-
I have a supply of
old diving helmets high tec protective gear which I am happy to offer to VP partygoers for a mere £49.99 (cash) angel1
-
I have a bit of a tight chest too... oink! evil:
-
I have a bit of a tight chest too... oink! evil:
and wallet whistle:
-
If it helps at all The THW has been coughing and sneezing all over the place for three days ~ now I have a tight chest, spore throat etc.
All the symptoms of a "Spring cold".
I will now say sorry in advance to all those who will be meeting me on Friday for any and all infections you may walk away with.
eeek: eeek: eeek:
I shall be wearing my finest bee keepers outfit noooo:
-
I have a bit of a tight chest too... oink! evil:
and wallet whistle:
evil:
-
If it helps at all The THW has been coughing and sneezing all over the place for three days ~ now I have a tight chest, spore throat etc.
All the symptoms of a "Spring cold".
I will now say sorry in advance to all those who will be meeting me on Friday for any and all infections you may walk away with.
eeek: eeek: eeek:
I shall be wearing my finest bee keepers outfit noooo:
Is someone taking some bees? rubschin:
-
Is nobody going to laugh at my spore throat joke? cry:
-
ha ha
-
Is nobody going to laugh at my spore throat joke? cry:
happy100 happy100 happy100
It must be the fever noooo:
-
ha ha
Somehow I don't feel your heart was really in that. confused:
-
Is nobody going to laugh at my spore throat joke? cry:
happy100 happy100 happy100
It must be the fever noooo:
NO FEVER! Just the beginnings of a fecking cold! evil:
-
Now now ..don't tempt fate lol:
-
Is nobody going to laugh at my spore throat joke? cry:
happy100 happy100 happy100
It must be the fever noooo:
OINK OINK! Oink oink oinkoinkoink oink oinkoink oink! evil:
scared2:
-
.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FaVFmu19.jpg&hash=a09181fcb71c428eb626515317638e4ce82b2a6e) (http://www.postimage.org/) eeek: sick2: eeek:
-
I worry about you lol: lol: lol:
-
.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.postimage.org%2FaVFmu19.jpg&hash=a09181fcb71c428eb626515317638e4ce82b2a6e) (http://www.postimage.org/) eeek: sick2: eeek:
Landlady! eeek:
-
I worry about you lol: lol: lol:
That's what the Dr said too ;)
-
I worry about you lol: lol: lol:
That's what the Dr said too ;)
Doctor Who?
-
Landlady! eeek:
I think you might find the topic of this thread highly appropriate BM noooo:
-
Landlady! eeek:
I think you might find the topic of this thread highly appropriate BM noooo:
scared2:
-
I see pig flu is in Eton...? scared2:
Oink!
-
Just checking in case you thought I was dead in a pile of used Kleenex ( eyes:) like.
As you are all still posting I may assume none of you are dead either. Unless you have been replaced by government operatives whose duty it is to pretend to be you. Thereby avoiding sending TG into a panic.
All is well.
All is well.
All is well.
Abrolhos! Bless you my son. cloud9:
-
Just checking in case you thought I was dead in a pile of used Kleenex ( eyes:) like.
As you are all still posting I may assume none of you are dead either. Unless you have been replaced by government operatives whose duty it is to pretend to be you. Thereby avoiding sending TG into a panic.
All is well.
All is well.
All is well.
Abrolhos! Bless you my son. cloud9:
All is well!
What time will you be getting to my party like...?
-
He is pissed already noooo:
FIGHT!!!!!
-
Party?
-
Party?
doh:
-
2 people critically ill with Swine Flu in Scotland ...and no word from Nick sad24:
-
eeek:
-
rubschin: I think I'll leave my mask in place for the time being then...
-
2 people critically ill with Swine Flu in Scotland ...and no word from Nick sad24:
It's the deep-fried Mars Bars I tell you. Leaves them open to all sorts of infections
-
Cue Eccles Voice "You filthy rotten swine you!"
-
rubschin: I think I'll leave my mask in place for the time being then...
Think I'll join you
-
Oink scared2:
-
I reckon we'll be at Level 6 by July ... the numbers are increasing 8)
-
Spreading faster now.....
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsn111w.snt111.mail.live.com%2Fatt%2FGetAttachment.aspx%3Ftnail%3D0%26amp%3BmessageId%3D0f8fae15-de9d-41c7-8d1c-20305296d368%26amp%3BAux%3D44%7C0%7C8CBB44710C23F50%7C&hash=9d3f75b12d22f23784a990d91b38c3d05008bc6b)
-
Oink! redface:
-
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8087213.stm
spider:
-
This could account for Nick's silence rubschin:
The number of confirmed swine flu cases in Scotland roared past 300 as the NHS investigated more than 500 "possible cases" and world health officials considered raising the severity of the epidemic to its highest level eeek: eeek: eeek:
-
rubschin:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/asia-pacific/8094353.stm
Level 6 ... imminent
-
scared2:
Everyone, put your masks on (except BM who will wear his bucket)
-
scared2:
Everyone, put your masks on (except BM who will wear his bucket)
Bucket at the ready! bom
-
If you sneeze inside it you may go deaf
-
If you sneeze inside it you may go deaf
Or my eyes pop out through the eye hole like... eeek:
-
You might scare off the regulars eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg25.imageshack.us%2Fimg25%2F1940%2F31255220.jpg&hash=988fdb0905c3f716ed751544602f57ba5221d31f) (http://www.postimage.org/)
-
It's official! scared2: Level 6 pandemic
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8094655.stm
-
You might scare off the regulars eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg25.imageshack.us%2Fimg25%2F1940%2F31255220.jpg&hash=988fdb0905c3f716ed751544602f57ba5221d31f) (http://www.postimage.org/)
'e looks just like that Daft Ada from them Star Wars fillums.
-
You might scare off the regulars eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg25.imageshack.us%2Fimg25%2F1940%2F31255220.jpg&hash=988fdb0905c3f716ed751544602f57ba5221d31f) (http://www.postimage.org/)
'e looks just like that Daft Ada from them Star Wars fillums.
He does a bit, don't he. Mind, fancy dress and pandemic protection rolled into one; he'd take the advantage there rubschin:
-
You might scare off the regulars eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg25.imageshack.us%2Fimg25%2F1940%2F31255220.jpg&hash=988fdb0905c3f716ed751544602f57ba5221d31f) (http://www.postimage.org/)
happy001
-
A mahoosive improvement. He should wear it all the time
-
You might scare off the regulars eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg25.imageshack.us%2Fimg25%2F1940%2F31255220.jpg&hash=988fdb0905c3f716ed751544602f57ba5221d31f) (http://www.postimage.org/)
Why limit it - he would scare anybody in that get up eeek:
-
True. If he goes to the fancy dress party with the bucket we might see some new headlines in the Cyprus Daily News whistle:
-
True. If he goes to the fancy dress party with the bucket we might see some new headlines in the Cyprus Daily News whistle:
Idiot turns up at cowboy party dressed as robot?
-
BM looks a little pale (pail)
-
"Local Barman turns water crisis on it's head"
-
Pissed Pissouri man wears own toilet
-
Barman regrets taking on the bet that he could dive from a rooftop into one gallon of water.
-
LL reminds BM where the mop is
-
happy001
evil:
-
LL reminds BM where the mop is
Can you guess where the mop is in this picture children?
-
shocked003 shocked003 shocked003
A patient suffering from swine flu died Sunday in hospital in Scotland, authorities there announced, in the first death of a patient with the virus in Britain and the first outside the Americas.
"With regret, we can confirm that one of the patients who had been in hospital, and had been confirmed as suffering from the H1N1 virus, has died today," said a statement issued by the Scottish Government. "The patient had underlying health conditions."
Time to get the masks back on people eeek:
Although small disclaimer - doesn't say they died of swine flu - just that they were suffering from it when they died rubschin:
-
Nick's gone quiet scared2:
-
Confirmed today on the news that she was 38, had recently given birth to a premature baby and died of flu related "complications". How much is true and how much is scaremongering I have no idea but Prof Rentagob AKA Pennington was on the news burbling about it being serious but only for a very few people. I 'spect her family and the baby consider it serious enough.
-
She prolly died of MRSA or some other filthy horse pickle disease... noooo:
-
The BBC headline reads
Flu risk 'still low' after death
Well it would be rubschin:
-
The BBC headline reads
Flu risk 'still low' after death
Well it would be rubschin:
drumroll:
-
Think I'm getting a cold scared2:
-
Think I'm getting a curly tail scared2:
eeek:
-
You might scare off the regulars eeek:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg25.imageshack.us%2Fimg25%2F1940%2F31255220.jpg&hash=988fdb0905c3f716ed751544602f57ba5221d31f) (http://www.postimage.org/)
'e looks just like that Daft Ada from them Star Wars fillums.
Strong with the dark side of the farce he is....
As for scaring everyone we should be fine as long as he doesn't take it off whistle:
-
Think I'm getting a curly tail scared2:
eeek:
shocked003
-
She should lay off the pork noooo:
-
But it's so comfortable whistle:
-
eeek:
-
whacky115
-
Swine flu reported in primary school (9 of em ) 1 road away from me - and I still have no leaflet noooo:
-
How will a leaflet help? Just flee for your life scared2:
-
But where will I go scared2:
-
rubschin:
Sven's?
-
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg4.imageshack.us%2Fimg4%2F669%2F52831380.jpg&hash=4773f87ffcb858bfd5c9ce55dfa845c789d32f63) (http://www.postimage.org/)
rubschin:
-
Pastis could find you a little corner I am sure. He has fish! happy088
-
Pastis could find you a little corner I am sure. He has fish! happy088
Would I have to face it - the corner that is cry:
-
shutup:
-
shutup: eeek: shutup: eeek:
-
lol: lol: lol:
-
Swine flu reported in primary school (9 of em ) 1 road away from me - and I still have no leaflet noooo:
eeek:
As you live in a 'Danger Zone' you will have to face a strict medical examination when you come to Cyprus...
eyes:
-
BM rushes out to buy rubber gloves noooo:
-
As you live in a 'Danger Zone' you will have to face a strict medical examination when you come to Cyprus...
eyes:
Isn't the world one big danger zone rubschin:
I will get my doctor to provide me with a well certificate whistle:
-
Cyprus can be dangerous in ways you could hardly imagine eeek:
-
I will have a special padlock on my suitcase and count how many items of clothing I am taking and making sure i return with the same amount whistle:
-
I will have a special padlock on my suitcase and count how many items of clothing I am taking and making sure i return with the same amount whistle:
Bah! Banghead
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yp6U_5qEE0Y (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yp6U_5qEE0Y)
scared2:
-
You are nuts Nick lol:
Anybody know anybody that has caught it yet rubschin:
-
I wish Nick would get it and stop posting bloody keyboard bastard cat! cussing:
-
Has your tolerance threshold been penetrated lol:
-
Has your tolerance threshold been penetrated lol:
I fear so... which means he will post more now... noooo:
I've stopped clicking them anyway like... whistle:
-
eveilgrin:
The one on this page is quite good!
-
eveilgrin:
The one on this page is quite good!
I'm still not clicking it... noooo:
-
You will miss the bit where the reporter dies live on TV like and the cat is prepared!
-
It is quite good whistle:
-
bah! Banghead
I've clicked it now! Banghead
He wasn't dead at all... just passed out like! noooo:
I demand a refund! Angry9:
-
How do you know he isn't dead? And the cat was on fine form I thought
Anyhoo, TMR has a treat in store angel1
-
Nick finally meets his hero - keyboard cat!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bqz_2AOW7ck
point:
-
lol:
-
I think you will find this is the correct version! angel1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcaULmvKv-s (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcaULmvKv-s)
-
I have Swine Flu training on Monday - that should be interesting Shrugs:
-
Wot ~ you gonna teach it to do tricks or summat?
-
I only teach old dogs those whistle:
-
eyes: I may hold you to that.
-
I have Swine Flu training on Monday - that should be interesting Shrugs:
Popcorn:
Will we ALL die? sad32:
-
It is inevitable whistle:
-
Are they covering wills? If we ALL die who gets the money?
Ha, they have forgotten that!!
-
What money ? - aren't we all in debt up to the eyeballs noooo:
-
Assets!
-
Language!
-
eeek:
Will the bath overflow?
-
Eh Shrugs:
-
DO I have to go back to BM's bucket? whistle:
-
First swine flu death in London
A 19-year-old man has died after getting swine flu in London, health authorities have said.
London, where more than 1,900 people have contracted the disease, is the second worst-affected area in the UK.
2 weeks and counting before I go on holiday cloud9: .....any infected, parasitic, flu infested creature that dares try and give me swine flu before then will be torn apart hair by hair and sliced into a thousand pork scratchings evil:
-
I come into contact with very few people in my day to day life, even the kids no longer go to school so are not likely to bring it home with them BUT I do spend a lot of time in doctors waiting rooms, consulting rooms and hospitals.
So I figure I am likely to get it sooner rather than later.
-
We shall listen out for any oinking then
-
...any infected, parasitic, flu infested creature
You're going Egypt are you not? rubschin:
-
I ham rubschin:
-
I don't think they allow ham noooo:
porky
-
First swine flu death in London
A 19-year-old man has died after getting swine flu in London, health authorities have said.
London, where more than 1,900 people have contracted the disease, is the second worst-affected area in the UK.
The teenager, from south London, had serious underlying health problems. Tests undertaken after his death showed he had swine flu.
Yet again the flu just added a complication to someone who wasn't that well anyway.
Still no reason to panic. (even though I have underlying health problems and I get a free flu jab each winter eeek:)
-
First swine flu death in London
A 19-year-old man has died after getting swine flu in London, health authorities have said.
London, where more than 1,900 people have contracted the disease, is the second worst-affected area in the UK.
The teenager, from south London, had serious underlying health problems. Tests undertaken after his death showed he had swine flu.
Yet again the flu just added a complication to someone who wasn't that well anyway.
Still no reason to panic. (even though I have underlying health problems and I get a free flu jab each winter eeek:)
I am just hoping they will get the promised "Swine Flu Vacine" ready and out to the GPs before I catch it. Like Uncle I get a free jab each year (as does the missus 'cos she has asthma, Minimus is the worry as he can't have a flu jab due to his egg allergy)
-
The government says the UK has moved from the ?containment? to the ?treatment? phase of Swine flu as the number of people catching swine flu continues to rise. The Fawkes family are in London for another fortnight, before we head for France. 4 year-old Miss Fawkes is in day two of displaying possible Swine flu symptoms: high temperatures, tummy ache, headaches and a dry cough.
Last night a worried mother took Miss Fawkes (who had a temperature of 39.1 degrees) to the paediatric A & E unit of a London hospital where she was given a mask and told to go instead to a walk-in unit. The walk-in unit told her there was a four hour wait and that she might as well go home and see her GP. This morning the GP?s receptionist said that they could not have a suspected case of Swine flu in the waiting room and she was to go home.
So in the last 48 hours we have been unable either to get our daughter tested, which is causing anxiety, or obtain a prescription for anti-viral drugs. Bear in mind we have a two year-old daughter as well. We are now trying to get a private prescription?
Source (http://order-order.com/2009/07/03/swine-flu-update/#comments)
noooo:
-
So the government has it all organised like. noooo:
-
Yep - I'm being trained on Monday confused2:
-
So the government has it all organised like. noooo:
And Gordo is a financial genius...
-
Yep - I'm being trained on Monday confused2:
You'll be able to hear an 'oink' at 200m after training... prolly...
-
I might be in the squealay race lol:
-
I might be in the squealay race lol:
doh:
-
Or in the sty jump... whistle:
-
Mine was better whistle:
-
Mine was better whistle:
noooo:
-
Yep - I'm being trained on Monday confused2:
Trained to do what exactly?
-
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg188.imageshack.us%2Fimg188%2F5851%2F95311862.jpg&hash=0254b21afcc5701258cdb7b4ab3bd7662c2aca29) (http://www.postimage.org/)
-
I am off to be trained in the art of the swine shortly....
MMmmmm looking forward to seeing the agenda
[1] Don't panic
[2] Don't panic
[3] Don't panic
[4] Don't panic
[5] Don't panic
[6] AOB
-
Wear a mask, just in case like
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg193.imageshack.us%2Fimg193%2F6412%2F12803825.jpg&hash=33afcd3fec58545bc76c82cec52e0356e4b9f0f6) (http://www.postimage.org/)
-
Being a council meeting I would imagine the discussion will centre on how to get away with collecting the dead on a fortnightly basis.
-
Indeed the mortuary overspill is a big consideration 8)
You will laugh but the back up is a car park with portable refrigeration units whistle:
-
Do they have any room for my surplus broccoli?
-
Indeed the mortuary overspill is a big consideration 8)
You will laugh but the back up is a car park with portable refrigeration units whistle:
Why would I laugh when I know it to be standard emergency planning? angel1
-
Well they could just use a mahoosive patio
-
doh:
-
The pub will have its own pig flu expert... cloud9:
-
It's about time we had an expert on summat noooo:
-
It's about time we had an expert on summat noooo:
rubschin:
We could call on GOS for marching advice... razz:
-
VP Expert Checklist:
1. Marching
2. Pig Flu (Theory Part 1)
3. Young's Beer through the Ages
4. Tat
5. Goats (Beginner)
Thank Christ we never entered a pub quiz league noooo:
-
We do have an expert on chaos tho... whistle:
-
Nick, your specialist subject is:
"A&E departments of North-West England."
Your time starts now.
-
evil:
-
Oh look:
A nine-year-old girl has become the fifth person to die from swine flu in the UK.
The child from south London had "serious underlying health problems", NHS London has said.
-
Oh look:
A nine-year-old girl has become the fifth person to die from swine flu in the UK.
The child from south London had "serious underlying health problems", NHS London has said.
I expect the serious underlying health problems started in America too... whistle:
-
Or Egypt whistle:
-
So, how was the meeting?
-
Buy shares in Electrolux
-
So, how was the meeting?
Lots of facts , figures information to go away and read - need to invoke protocol on my staff for when they visit people - mitigate risks and lots of other legalese speak noooo:
-
So, in short, it's masks innit?
-
Masks only if you are going to be within 1 metre of person and even then it has to be a fluid retaining mask not the ordinary ones you see most people wearing ( think surgeons mask ) . I hope yours complies Pastis rubschin: . Masks are therefore not a realistic preventative measure noooo:
It's touching things that have a far greater risk. The virus can live for 24 hrs on non organic materials and only 2 on others.
-
Like Egyptian money rubschin:
-
Masks and surgical gloves then ... eeek:
-
That will be the order of the day ....I'm sure you won't look too strange in that and a Tux lol:
-
Now you come to mention it, it's the same sort of advice given out regarding preventing the spread of Noro virus on ships. I'm well practised at this... evil:
Think using elbows (covered) to open doors, turn taps, close taps, close doors... use napkins to handle plates, knives, forks, cruets etc.... I could do training angel1
-
You could be a consultant and charge double 8)
-
Or part thereof whistle:
-
14 cases at my kid's school. eeek:
-
Will be very common now - schools will no longer be closing - you will just be expected to keep your child off school if they exhibit any symptons
-
14 cases at my kid's school. eeek:
Best book some time off work like.
-
But I'm going on holiday soon. eeek:
-
Exactly the moment when all of my children, over the years, have managed to catch something ~ and the one year when none of them caught anything the eldest girl got herself knocked over by a car on the way home from school on the day they broke up.
I have spread measles, unknowingly, all over Holland by trotting round with a child who we thought had a sniffle and she developed full blown measles on the boat home. I have had the eldest boy diagnosed with "A mump" (No I didn't know you could get them singularly either) on the day before departure. We postponed that holiday by a fortnight and bugger me if half way through the delayed holiday he came down with the second mump. Banghead
At one time the local A&E receptionists used to greet me with the words "Hello again Mr Snoopy ~ which one is it this time?"
-
To all of us who are just about to go on our well deserved holidays
:lalalala :lalalala :lalalala :lalalala :lalalala
-
Unfortunately, I suspect this is exactly what happened on the ship that's been moored off Invergordon since Monday. In spite of better judgement and making a declaration of good health someone decided to board whilst suffering some form of gastroenteritis and before you know it half the passengers come down with it noooo:
-
There have been times over the last 41 years when I have felt some sympathy with Herod's ideas. evil: evil:
-
1st person in my team reported ill today with suspected swine flu noooo:
-
Get one of these.
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fphotos.jibble.org%2Falbums%2FBradford-on-AvonAtEaster%2FBarge_Pole_At_Bradford_on_von_Lock_Gates_A8V9293.jpg&hash=13594ca518a64546732012ed16ad422405c3b501)
No not the guy in jeans but a barge pole
-
You always spoil my fun lol:
-
I did choose the picture with care whistle:
-
Just talking to a chap in the office and remarked that I hadn't seen him for a while.
"Oh, I've been off with swine flu" <cough, cough>
Double plus eeek:
-
I see in today's rag that anyone who imagines they have swine flu will be encouraged to take two weeks off work.
I predict an epidemic!
-
You all need to identify your flu friend - someone who will go to the doctors / chemist / supermarket etc for you to pick up prescriptions , food and such like - as you should stay at home.
Nick will you do my online shopping for me if I get ill lol: lol: lol:
-
Happy to help out. Fish?
-
No fish , or clowns, or books on travel disasters over the years thanks - just the usual whistle:
-
No fish , or clowns, or books on travel disasters over the years thanks - just the usual whistle:
In boxes or bottles?
-
I'm happy with VATS please whistle:
-
http://thescotsman.scotsman.com/uk/Everyone-in-the-UK-to.5452124.jp (http://thescotsman.scotsman.com/uk/Everyone-in-the-UK-to.5452124.jp)
I find this worrying. Is it to be compulsory??
-
I read this headline and started worrying, as Mrs TMRBB is doing a lot of flying these days redface:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8148709.stm
-
Oh yes, hairyplanes are sinks of infection noooo:
As are cruise ships whistle:
-
I'm still not worrying.
-
It's very important to think positively when entering an area of infestation. Well done
-
http://thescotsman.scotsman.com/uk/Everyone-in-the-UK-to.5452124.jp (http://thescotsman.scotsman.com/uk/Everyone-in-the-UK-to.5452124.jp)
I find this worrying. Is it to be compulsory??
How about expats...? sad24:
-
The vast majority of those that have died from swine flu have all, allegedly, had "underlying health problems".
That's probably true.
But why on earth haven't they told us what these problems were? How are we meant to try and judge how dangerous this virus is, unless we know how ill you have to be in the first place for it to be a real worry. If they had rabies, lung cancer, double pneumonia, malaria, ebola or something like that then I would think "fine, they were probably going pop their cork anyway".
But what if they only had a bit of mild asthma? Or athletes foot? Or hay-fever? I would certainly start being a bit more concerned if that were the case.
So why the secrecy? Or is it a conscious decision to keep the full facts at bay as long as possible to avoid potential panic?
They are very quick to ram fuck-witted advice like "Catch it, bin it, kill" down our throats and send Janet and John leaflets to all and sundry, but this is typical of this administration - being seen to be doing something whilst all the time they simply don't have a clue about the real issues. Just look at the economy, for example.
I have no doubt that someone in my immediate family will contract the virus - it would just be nice to know whether I am more likely to buy them a box of tissues and some Lockets, or a wooden casket.
'Snot too much to ask, is it?
-
This is what I have been given for my team
Staff in High Risk Groups
The following advice is designed to protect staff in high risk groups from the complications of flu while maintaining staff attendance at work as much as possible. It is important to avoid unnecessary absence that could last for the whole period of the Pandemic.
People in the following high risk groups are not necessarily more likely to be infected but they may be more at risk of getting serious complications if they catch flu:-
People with:-
Chronic lung disease
Chronic heart disease
Chronic kidney disease
Chronic liver disease
Chronic neurological disease
Immunosuppression (whether caused by disease or treatment)
Diabetes mellitus
People who have had drug treatment for asthma within the past three years
Pregnant women
People aged 65 and older
Children under 5
Advice to staff in high risk groups and their managers:-
There will be varying degrees of risk within each of the groups above and only the GP can advise individual staff members of the risks associated with their personal clinical circumstances.
To do this, GPs also need to know the measures in place to protect vulnerable staff from possible sources of infection in the workplace. They can then see whether or not risks at work are any greater than the risks the staff member will face in the community if they stay off work.
Management staff should talk to staff in high risk groups about the measures that can be taken to reduce their risk of infection, ideally before a case arises. The individual staff member can then judge whether or not there is a significantly increased risk of infection involved in coming to work compared to the risks they will face anyway if they do not come to work.
If the staff member is not reassured by these precautions they should seek advice from their GP. They should have the above information clearly prepared as GPs may not have time to ask exploratory questions.
-
It would seem that in this house only two are likely to survive as three have some (more than one) of the underlying risk factors scared2:
Best spend our days indoors and away from people until we can be vaccinated then ~ tho' Minmus cannot be vaccinated as they grow the vaccine on egg to which he is allergic ::)
-
Seal up your windows. Buy bells for your neighbours scared2:
-
Reassurance spun to keep panic at bay or the truth?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8150527.stm
-
Um, swine flu is a natural cause of death innit?
-
Indeed, a report worthy of Mandleson at his best. Tells the truth but in such a way as to suggest something completely different. Deniable at all times but fully intended to mislead. Hence my suggestion that it was "spun".
-
Um, swine flu is a natural cause of death innit?
Apart from murder /manslaughter / suicide / accident are there any other unnatural causes of death rubschin:
-
Um, swine flu is a natural cause of death innit?
Apart from murder /manslaughter / suicide / accident are there any other unnatural causes of death rubschin:
Yes. Wives.
-
My Great, Great Grandfather was adjudged by the Coroner's Jury to have "Died by the Visitation of God".
In fact the surgeon said he died of unspecified natural causes but the Jury weren't having any of that ~ If one of their number died in his sleep at the age of 56 they felt something more was needed. In point of fact he probably died of long term Arsenic poisoning as he was a tinsmith and they used Arsenic in their work and early death was not uncommon ~ for no apparent reason.
Frankly I rather like the phrase the jury selected ....... given that this was in 1860 and people held religion in much greater esteem than they do today it was probably meant as a comfort to his window and 14 ( eeek:) children.
-
Um, swine flu is a natural cause of death innit?
Apart from murder /manslaughter / suicide / accident are there any other unnatural causes of death rubschin:
Yes. Wives.
Nagged to death is a well known cause. lol:
-
Um, swine flu is a natural cause of death innit?
Apart from murder /manslaughter / suicide / accident are there any other unnatural causes of death rubschin:
Yes. Wives.
Nagged to death is a well known cause. lol:
Because those that succumb, choose to. And fair play to them I say.
-
Bitterness must be a contributing factor as well lol:
-
Um, swine flu is a natural cause of death innit?
Apart from murder /manslaughter / suicide / accident are there any other unnatural causes of death rubschin:
Yes. Wives.
Nagged to death is a well known cause. lol:
Because those that succumb, choose to. And fair play to them I say.
There are times when a loooooooooong sleep seems preferable. surrender:
-
Um, swine flu is a natural cause of death innit?
Apart from murder /manslaughter / suicide / accident are there any other unnatural causes of death rubschin:
Yes. Wives.
Nagged to death is a well known cause. lol:
Because those that succumb, choose to. And fair play to them I say.
There are times when a loooooooooong sleep seems preferable. surrender:
The hound talks sense. I love him. Kidney deep cloud9:
-
Um, swine flu is a natural cause of death innit?
Apart from murder /manslaughter / suicide / accident are there any other unnatural causes of death rubschin:
Yes. Wives.
Nagged to death is a well known cause. lol:
Or shagged to death in his case by the sound of it. Something you are quite safe from I fear
-
Um, swine flu is a natural cause of death innit?
Apart from murder /manslaughter / suicide / accident are there any other unnatural causes of death rubschin:
Retsina?
-
drumroll:
-
Swine Flu Confirmed in Colwyn Bay
That's only ten miles from here scared2: scared2: scared2: scared2:
-
Yes. And. So. What.
-
Welsh people die. A nation rejoices
noooo:
-
We have several of our staff ringing to say they ' feel ' like they have sore throats and as the advice is to stay away from others they had best stay at home.
This could be a waster's charter for the next few months Banghead Banghead Banghead
-
Ahem
Re: We are all going to die!
? Reply #614 on: July 11, 2009, 11:05:09 AM ?
-- ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I see in today's rag that anyone who imagines they have swine flu will be encouraged to take two weeks off work.
I predict an epidemic!
-
Yes. And. So. What.
Well the person who told us yesterday morning was calling to say her little boy, who was due to be here on a sleepover with Minimus this coming weekend, has been playing with the child who, along with its mother, has been confirmed as having Swine Flu in Colwyn Bay whilst she, the caller, was going into Walton Hospital, Scallypool for an operation. She said "I don't suppose you want him to come for the weekend now". We said "Well obviously not and we think you had better tell the hospital also as they are unlikely to want you in there as a potential carrier either".
Last evening the local paper came out with the headline I posted.
-
Oink
-
rubschin:
How about The All New Virtual Pub Swine Flue Death Lottery Quiz Bingo?
Any takers?
-
rubschin:
How about The All New Virtual Pub Swine Flue Death Lottery Quiz Bingo?
Any takers?
Flue? eeek:
-
How's that work then?
Oh look:
Cherie 'has suspected swine flu' (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8153646.stm)
Shame.
-
I suppose there would be rools?
-
rubschin:
How about The All New Virtual Pub Swine Flue Death Lottery Quiz Bingo?
Any takers?
Flue? eeek:
Another good idea gone up in smoke.
-
rubschin:
How about The All New Virtual Pub Swine Flue Death Lottery Quiz Bingo?
Any takers?
Flue? eeek:
Arse! redface:
-
How's that work then?
Oh look:
Cherie 'has suspected swine flu' (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8153646.stm)
Shame.
Excellent! I had her on my card too - the pig-faced munter! lol:
-
What card?
-
What card?
Didn't you get your card? Shrugs:
-
A lady I work with in the Oxfam shop has a 7 month old grandchild. This child has not had a good start in life having spent most of his time in hospital with amongst other things, epilepsy, Hyper active thalmus or thyroid or summat and respitory problems.
The child is now back in hospital having been diagnosed with swine flu.
Doesn't look good.
What a bastard.
-
A lady I work with in the Oxfam shop has a 7 month old grandchild. This child has not had a good start in life having spent most of his time in hospital with amongst other things, epilepsy, Hyper active thalmus or thyroid or summat and respitory problems.
The child is now back in hospital having been diagnosed with swine flu.
Doesn't look good.
What a bastard.
Bugger... noooo:
-
I shall now roll out the usual homilies :
Homily # 1 : Puts it all into perspective dunnit.
Homily # 2 : I ain't got a job but I've still got my health.
Homily # 3 : Mrs TG works in the front line with the NHS so we* will get the much vaunted and no doubt highly effective cure before any other bugger!
And so on.
* I say 'we' but I may be left to sniffle over my stiff upper lip in a corner somewhere. noooo:
-
A lady I work with in the Oxfam shop has a 7 month old grandchild. This child has not had a good start in life having spent most of his time in hospital with amongst other things, epilepsy, Hyper active thalmus or thyroid or summat and respitory problems.
The child is now back in hospital having been diagnosed with swine flu.
Doesn't look good.
What a bastard.
Poor sod
-
A lady I work with in the Oxfam shop has a 7 month old grandchild. This child has not had a good start in life having spent most of his time in hospital with amongst other things, epilepsy, Hyper active thalmus or thyroid or summat and respitory problems.
The child is now back in hospital having been diagnosed with swine flu.
Doesn't look good.
What a bastard.
Hope the kid makes it ~ but then perhaps with all the other problems ....................... Fuck! Life is a crock of shit!!!
-
There but for the grace of God . . etc.
It will be a terrible worry for them but the odds are not all that bad if the diagnosis was early.
There will be many more such stories before it is over I fear. noooo:
-
rubschin:
How about The All New Virtual Pub Swine Flue Death Lottery Quiz Bingo?
Any takers?
Miss C is on my card! whistle:
-
Two of my guys are off with it, and a fellow manager. I was in a meeting with one of them for an hour or so last week
Today, a colleague comes in, all sniffs and snuffles and says he may have it (prize prick). His missus works in A & E reception... it's only a matter of time
-
One of the regulars in the real pub has it. I was talking to him two days before the symptoms started scared2:
-
Have you made a will?
-
Have you made a will?
Wills are for quitters lol:
-
I was in the doctor's this morning arranging a repeat prescription and we got talking about swine flu. He said that it comes on very rapidly, within a couple of hours. If you've got sniffles and a bit of a cough for a day or so then it's just a cold.
-
scared2:
-
scared2:
TMR is prolly dead by now... (https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Fsmileys%2Fsmiley-sick013.gif&hash=1c62f25f8bcc8ac2a4f6473a589fdff5660e754f) (http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php)
-
scared2:
TMR is prolly dead by now... (https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Fsmileys%2Fsmiley-sick013.gif&hash=1c62f25f8bcc8ac2a4f6473a589fdff5660e754f) (http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php)
I am going for a liquid cure whistle:
-
scared2:
TMR is prolly dead by now... (https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Fsmileys%2Fsmiley-sick013.gif&hash=1c62f25f8bcc8ac2a4f6473a589fdff5660e754f) (http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php)
I am going for a liquid cure whistle:
He lives! A miracle! worthy:
-
Test Match special in the pub - buy 5 pints whilst the cricket is on and get a free pint. So I'll prolly end up having 12 today :-)
-
I've got it! eeek:
Tight chest, painful cough, high temperature, sweats and shakes overnight.
I've contacted the National Pandemic Flu Centre and they recommend antivirals because of my heart condition. So a kind neighbour is going to get them for me. She came over to collect the references and my ID.
She held out a plastic bag for me to put them in so she didn't have to touch them.
-
Poor Uncle... (https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freesmileys.org%2Fsmileys%2Fsmiley-sad055.gif&hash=f4917f1c7fc19ae6432af242512742b8439fbfdb) (http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php)
-
I've got it! eeek:
Tight chest, painful cough, high temperature, sweats and shakes overnight.
I've contacted the National Pandemic Flu Centre and they recommend antivirals because of my heart condition. So a kind neighbour is going to get them for me. She came over to collect the references and my ID.
She held out a plastic bag for me to put them in so she didn't have to touch them.
Well what do you expect if you will spend two weeks cooped up in a confined space with a lot of strangers and then compound the folly by flying back and forth in an even smaller space breathing recirculated air that has already been through at least 120 other people's lungs?
Sorry you don't feel up to snuff but honestly. Self inflicted wounds win no medals you know.
-
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg17.imageshack.us%2Fimg17%2F6118%2F53310715.gif&hash=565b5f9414140e293c04c394e32e5c031ec8a18a) (http://www.postimage.org/)
-
I've got it! eeek:
Tight chest, painful cough, high temperature, sweats and shakes overnight.
I've contacted the National Pandemic Flu Centre and they recommend antivirals because of my heart condition. So a kind neighbour is going to get them for me. She came over to collect the references and my ID.
She held out a plastic bag for me to put them in so she didn't have to touch them.
Bad luck old chap. I hope you recover very soon. cry:
Not connected, but is your 'Health and Efficiency' collection promised to anyone?
-
I've got it! eeek:
Tight chest, painful cough, high temperature, sweats and shakes overnight.
I've contacted the National Pandemic Flu Centre and they recommend antivirals because of my heart condition. So a kind neighbour is going to get them for me. She came over to collect the references and my ID.
She held out a plastic bag for me to put them in so she didn't have to touch them.
Bad luck old chap. I hope you recover very soon. cry:
Not connected, but is your 'Health and Efficiency' collection promised to anyone?
You can have that Darwin - the complete Razzle Collection - 1970 - 2000 is mine.... whistle:
-
Well what do you expect if you will spend two weeks cooped up in a confined space with a lot of strangers and then compound the folly by flying back and forth in an even smaller space breathing recirculated air that has already been through at least 120 other people's lungs?
Sorry you don't feel up to snuff but honestly. Self inflicted wounds win no medals you know.
Wasn't after medals. ::)
No real idea where I got it from. Feel a bit better today but the office doesn't want me in (unclean! unclean!)
Nice of the neighbours to help out, at a distance of course.
-
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg190.imageshack.us%2Fimg190%2F7983%2F88021460.gif&hash=62bc28c86af33447a41004516a4f654e7d85fd5e) (http://www.postimage.org/)
-
Well what do you expect if you will spend two weeks cooped up in a confined space with a lot of strangers and then compound the folly by flying back and forth in an even smaller space breathing recirculated air that has already been through at least 120 other people's lungs?
Sorry you don't feel up to snuff but honestly. Self inflicted wounds win no medals you know.
Wasn't after medals. ::)
No real idea where I got it from. Feel a bit better today but the office doesn't want me in (unclean! unclean!)
Nice of the neighbours to help out, at a distance of course.
How long do you have to stay off for...?
-
How long do you have to stay off for...?
Not sure, I've had it for about 4-5 days and I think that the advice is that you can still spread the flu up to 5-7 days after the initial symptoms appear. Depends on how I feel of course but I might go back Wednesday.
-
How long do you have to stay off for...?
Not sure, I've had it for about 4-5 days and I think that the advice is that you can still spread the flu up to 5-7 days after the initial symptoms appear. Depends on how I feel of course but I might go back Wednesday.
Take the rest of the week off - to be sure like. ;)
-
I've just had two weeks off, holiday like. This may sound odd but I would like to get back.
Of course, give it half an hour in the office and I'll want to be at home. ;)
-
Alas poor Unc, we knew him well ....
-
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg23.imageshack.us%2Fimg23%2F4057%2F88617418.jpg&hash=09e5466e57abe497d95a9c1219781c89d5f18b29) (http://www.postimage.org/)
-
At last, some sensible advice 8)
http://uk.eurosport.yahoo.com/03082009/58/world-cup-qual-russians-turn-whisky.html
-
At last, some sensible advice 8)
http://uk.eurosport.yahoo.com/03082009/58/world-cup-qual-russians-turn-whisky.html
That's the way to do it!!!!!
''DISCOVER THE PIONEER SPIRIT
The Welsh Whisky Company produces Penderyn Single Malt Whisky and a range of high quality Welsh Spirits.
This site is for personal use in countries where the consumption of alcoholic products is lawful and you are the legal age for purchasing alcohol in the country in which you reside. Welsh Whisky encourages responsible consumption. For more information about responsible drinking, go to www.drinkaware.co.uk''
ENTER THE SHITE
-
Still alive! happy088
Bored out of my skull though.
-
Do you need some jobs to do rubschin:
-
Good to hear it Unc. But boredom... noooo:
You should do some of that social networking the Archbish says is very naughty and bad for you ;)
-
Do you need some jobs to do rubschin:
noooo:
I was planning to paint my daughter's bedroom before I was stricken down.
-
A nice shade of pink perhaps lol:
-
Originally pink and lilac, changed to yellow and blue during her 'Pokemon' phase. Now needs updating to suit a teenager.
-
Black then noooo:
-
Black then noooo:
lol: lol: lol:
-
I redecorated my own room one day in the holidays (I was 14).
My parents went berserk when they got home noooo:
-
I did the same at about the same age; hessian wallpaper... it was very kewl at the time rubschin:
-
I painted around the furniture redface:
How was I to know they had just put the house up for sale?
-
happy001 happy001 happy001
-
I painted around the furniture redface:
How was I to know they had just put the house up for sale?
You never change do you? noooo:
-
evil:
-
http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=swine_flu (http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=swine_flu) spider:
-
It would seem that they guessed wrongly.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8236768.stm
Then again this is really only another guess rubschin:
-
It would seem that they guessed wrongly.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8236768.stm
Then again this is really only another guess rubschin:
Farcical isn't it...? noooo:
-
The predicted autumn resurgance of piggy flu is happenning.
Cases doubled over the last 7 days innit.
You thought you had got away with it didnt you eh?
Well we didnt.
We are all going to die of snot.
Be warned. Gypsy TG has predicted the future.
I would offer you all a bet that I am right but you will all be dead innit.
Dont panic like. It's unseemly. noooo:
-
I don't have the energy to panic tunble:
-
Back on the carousel of doom noooo:
If it's not oink flu, E coli , C-Diff some other bastard thing is gonna get you. noooo:
-
Back on the carousel of doom noooo:
If it's not oink flu, E coli , C-Diff some other bastard thing is gonna get you. noooo:
That's my girl, ever the optimist. ;)
-
Excellent post over at Leg-Iron's journal (http://leg-iron.livejournal.com/225627.html) today!
happy088
-
That's my girl, ever the optimist. ;)
lol: lol: lol:
I like a challenge whistle:
-
Poor old me off work with
swine chest infection....diagnosed by one of gps i work for...cant say i have skived now can they.....
and poor TG is working there hard for a few weeks while me resting
-
You're luvin' it Mrs TG ;)
-
You're luvin' it Mrs TG ;)
sssshhhhhhh dont tell..... lol:
but me sick still... noooo:
-
happy100
-
I have the sniffles too..... cry:
-
Drinking out of damp glasses I expect.
-
Today, I have mostly been front of house at a swine flu clinic.
This involves shouting, bullying people to sign disclaimers in case they drop dead, gurning at young wimmin students, lots of bits of paper an forms, nurses and more shouting.
I shall be doing the same next Wednesday.
I have been offered the flu jab. scared2:
What do do? Jab or not to jab? rubschin:
-
You will be vaccinated with a dead virus that your body's defensive system will build up antibodies to so that IF you catch the real virus you will have in-build protection. You cannot catch anything from the dead virus. That said the Swine Flu vaccine contains other things that may cause a reaction and as yet there are no real statistics to tell us whether these "side effects" are dangerous or just an irritant. The main cause for concern as far as I can make out are the contents of the vaccine, Pandemrix, made by GlaxoSmithKline, which includes Thiomersal as a preservative and Squalene, a fish oil based additive which boosts the immune system allowing lower doses of the active ingredient to be used.
To coin a phrase the jury is still out on those two items. You have to make a choice.
-
I'm sure i heard that only 25-30% of nursing staff have the conventional flu jab when offered. A ex-colleague had a severe reaction to a flu-jab 20 years ago and ended up paralysed for the rest of his days. I won't be having one HTH.
-
I'm sure i heard that only 25-30% of nursing staff have the conventional flu jab when offered. A ex-colleague had a severe reaction to a flu-jab 20 years ago and ended up paralysed for the rest of his days. I won't be having one HTH.
Cheers! happy088
I have just had the jab! scared2:
-
I'm sure i heard that only 25-30% of nursing staff have the conventional flu jab when offered. A ex-colleague had a severe reaction to a flu-jab 20 years ago and ended up paralysed for the rest of his days. I won't be having one HTH.
Cheers! happy088
I have just had the jab! scared2:
point:
-
Just discussed this with the local Practice Nurse (as she redressed me bum)
In her opinion she would not give the Swine Flu jab to her children and is certainly not planning to have one herself. In my specific case, given my "underlying health issues", she feels that the potential for side effects is far outweighed by the possibility of serious complications should I catch the swine flu, so recommends that I have it. She see the dangers in the vaccine as being the "additives" rather than the dead flu virus in the injection. I have referred to these in a previous post but at the risk of boring you all the major concerns expressed by many, including my friendly nurse, are:
Thiomersal ~ which is a preservative often used in vaccinations. It is in fact an organomercury compound and that is the one that those who argue that Autism may be a result of vaccinations point to. It is a mercury and we all know that mercury can be deadly.
Squalene ~ is a fish oil based immune system booster. It is worth noting that Squalene is NOT being added to the vaccine being used in the USA because it is not licensed for use there. There are questions being asked as to the need for this additive which is, apparently, there to enable a single injection to be given rather than the recommended two jabs a fortnight apart (making it cheaper for HMG).
-
When I was playing host with the most at the swine flu clinic as far as I know the 3 practice nurses doing the business had not had it either.
Doing it again on Wednesday so I will ask the question.
Interestingly 3 of the doctors have had it. One of them was after me and after about 30 seconds in the room she burst out of the door and told one of the other doctors to get an Epi-pen and stand by in case she went into shock. eeek:
We larfed.
Doctors really do seem to be the worst patients.
-
I have had it too...not big deal i aint dropped dead as yet..... point:
-
mmmm. The pub aint blocked by the NHS then. rubschin:
Mrs TG is still at werk like. I am at home waiting to drop dead.
-
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8370859.stm
Oh Dear! There's no stopping it now.
Health officials say a Tamiflu-resistant strain of swine flu has spread between hospital patients.
-
Tamiflu is wot they give you to treat flu symptoms along with a hankie..
We have had the Pandemrix vaccine which is, well, a vaccine.
But no doubt the above mentioned story will fill up next weeks swine flu clinic.
-
So whatever happened to the great swine flu pandemic?
-
So whatever happened to the great swine flu pandemic?
Just scaremongering to try and take our minds off the imploding economy.
-
Xmas3: You mean the government lied to us Xmas3:
-
If they spoke ~ they lied. cussing:
-
Whatever happened to it ey?
Not a squeak or an oink for weeks now. rubschin:
P'raps the nippy weather killed it off with the aphids like? rubschin:
-
Pastis has been suffering.
-
Pastis has been suffering.
Apart from him though?
I've not 'eard of anyone complaining of even a cold or man flue for weeks now tbh.
This nippy weather is our saviour I reckon. cloud9:
Down to a most pleasant 45 F in Growler Towers now. No breeding bugs in here like....well that's my excuse for not 'avin' the heating on. ;)
-
I know quite a few friends that have been poorly recently but wether it is seasonal or oink flu who can tell ?
-
Prolly hangovers
-
I had an injection angel1
-
Against hangovers? eeek:
-
Oink flu
-
Oh I see. You see, from the thread context there was some ambiguity in your response which led me to think that...Oh, why do I bother?
-
Too much thinking wears out the brain.... I try to avoid thinking whenever possible. bom
-
Me being a (temporary) medical professional like I can hereby report that there are lots of spare body bags cluttering up the NHS.
Take up at swine flu clinics has been low and no one really gives a fork.
Students are a bunch of wet ends. Instead of taking to the streets protesting about summat they are more likely to go to A&E when they have a sore throat.
I kid you not. They go to casualty with a cold. We get a bill for about ?180 every time it happens.
Your NI contributions are being well spent.
Also, chinese students (I think China must be empty of under 25's as they all seem to be in Leicester) regard abortion as a valid form of contraception.
But thats another story.
-
How come the fooking Chinese get free NHS treatment? cussing:
-
How come the fooking Chinese get free NHS treatment? cussing:
Because without their "Overseas Student Fees" the fooking universities would all be closed down. You of all people .... etc ....... Banghead
-
I know that, but free NHS?
-
Whatever happened to this pig flu ey? rubschin:
I haven't actually met ANYONE who has really had it, or even the seasonal variety. confused:
Doesn't even make the news anymore. Have we all lost a friend in it? cry:
-
OINK Atishoo scared2:
Do pop round angel1
-
Our next-door-but-one-neighbour went back to the UK and caught pig flu...
Mind you she's shutup:
-
Our next-door-but-one-neighbour went back to the UK and caught pig flu...
Mind you she's shutup:
a pig?
-
Our next-door-but-one-neighbour went back to the UK and caught pig flu...
Mind you she's shutup:
a pig?
shutup:
-
She is a pig and I claim my ?5
-
I was going to say she is a lovely laydee.... whistle:
-
char048 char048 char048 char048 char048 char048 char048 char048 char048
-
shutup: shutup: shutup:
-
shutup: shutup: shutup:
Oh, a cow then?
-
Aches and pains this morning, sore throat, sniffles, bit of cough. eeek:
-
happy100 happy100 happy100
-
Aches and pains this morning, sore throat, sniffles, bit of cough. eeek:
Is your telescope promised to anyone?
-
Whatever happened to this pig flu ey? rubschin:
I haven't actually met ANYONE who has really had it, or even the seasonal variety. confused:
Doesn't even make the news anymore. Have we all lost a friend in it? cry:
I'm not sure if mine was the oink strain but 'flu it certainly was noooo:.
I hear of someone every week who's either got it or been down with it ... it's just not headline news any more.
-
Aches and pains this morning, sore throat, sniffles, bit of cough. eeek:
Is your telescope promised to anyone?
I haven't got one cry:
Yesterday I felt very rough, hardly moved from the sofa all day. Not so bad today, dripping nose and a tickley cough.
-
Aches and pains this morning, sore throat, sniffles, bit of cough. eeek:
Is your telescope promised to anyone?
I haven't got one cry:
Yesterday I felt very rough, hardly moved from the sofa all day. Not so bad today, dripping nose and a tickley cough.
I've got a great big one! Miss D has seen it! cloud9:
-
Just how big is his nose then Miss D?
-
lol:
Gets a lot bigger when he's talking I can tell you rubschin:
-
lol:
Gets a lot bigger when he's talking I can tell you rubschin:
evil:
-
Aches and pains this morning, sore throat, sniffles, bit of cough. eeek:
Is your telescope promised to anyone?
I haven't got one cry:
Sorry, I had visions of you in your garden every night waving your 10 inch Newtonian at the heavens.
-
My nose is sore sad32:
-
My nose is sore sad32:
That is from when the taxi driver punched you! point:
-
No, from excess snot.
I will post you some to examine angel1
-
My arm is sore; I've been jabbed!
-
My arm is sore; I've been jabbed!
With a poison-tipped umbrella? eeek:
-
No. ::)
A hyper hypod needle.
-
No. ::)
A hyper hypod needle.
Oh... evil:
-
Was it a pine one ?
-
Was it a pine one ?
noooo:
Gramophone
-
I remember those redface:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs4.postimage.org%2FhiBM9.jpg&hash=09357d6e6836b8107632cdd58f72f42d4e8e20b2) (http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=aVhiBM9)
-
rubschin: I've still got some ....... somewhere.
-
We meet a lot in our place who have said they have had it, usually about the time they were taking exams.
Student: Er.. I was sick last week, Swine floo prolly, can I have a sick note?
Us: Did you come and see the Doc?
S: Er... No. Exams. Plus I was sick.
Us: Doctor will not give you a note if he didnt see you. Go away.
S: But...
Us: Listen shagnasty, we know and you know that you are shite at exams and have completely ballsed it up. This is because you are stupid now piss off. NEXT!
The caring NHS. cloud9:
-
Look. Is this flue pandamonium over or what please? Shrugs:
Not heard owt about it for weeks now.
Can we all breathe again without having to resort to havin' buckets and stuff over our 'eds or what?
-
Look. Is this flue pandamonium over or what please? Shrugs:
Not heard owt about it for weeks now.
Can we all breathe again without having to resort to havin' buckets and stuff over our 'eds or what?
I'm not taking my bucket off... noooo:
-
Yes, you are better looking with it on
-
Look. Is this flue pandamonium over or what please? Shrugs:
Not heard owt about it for weeks now.
Can we all breathe again without having to resort to havin' buckets and stuff over our 'eds or what?
I'm not taking my bucket off... noooo:
But you look a right daft twat with it on. lol:
Some actually say you look a right owld daft twat with it off too, but that's another matter for great and deep discussion I suppose? Shrugs:
Any'ow, back on topic like, has this flue gone and pissed off now or what ey? ::)
-
Look. Is this flue pandamonium over or what please? Shrugs:
Not heard owt about it for weeks now.
Can we all breathe again without having to resort to havin' buckets and stuff over our 'eds or what?
I'm not taking my bucket off... noooo:
But you look a right daft twat with it on. lol:
Some actually say you look a right owld daft twat with it off too, but that's another matter for great and deep discussion I suppose? Shrugs:
Any'ow, back on topic like, has this flue gone and pissed off now or what ey? ::)
Miss D says I am the most handsomest man she has ever met in her whole life ever like... and sexy too or summat like that.... whistle:
-
She needs Specsavers and you need a hearing aid
-
She needs Specsavers and you need a hearing aid
Now who is jealous.... whistle:
-
Katey and Natasha were not disappointed eyes:
-
Katey and Natasha were not disappointed when I left
point:
-
Miss D says I am the most handsomest man she has ever met in her whole life ever like... and sexy too or summat like that.... whistle:
Hells bells man, how much collapso have you drunk already ? noooo: noooo: noooo: noooo: noooo:
-
My new nickname is yardstick point:
-
Miss D says I am the most handsomest man she has ever met in her whole life ever like... and sexy too or summat like that.... whistle:
Hells bells man, how much collapso have you drunk already ? noooo: noooo: noooo: noooo: noooo:
I thought you'd gone to the gym... redface:
-
I am now ...so it is safe to make up whatever delusional material you think you can get away with lol:
-
I am now ...so it is safe to make up whatever delusional material you think you can get away with lol:
evil:
-
point: point: point: point: point: point: point: point:
-
redface:
-
As your resident NHS insider I can tell you that swine flu is at the top of your GP's agenda along with medication reviews of any kind. A list too long to bore you and me both with.
This has to do with 'QOF points'.
QOF being 'Quality and Outcomes Framework' this means anytime you bring a patient in for pretty much anything the GP gets a wad of cash.
This is the last month of the financial year so you can take my word for it that Swine Flu jabs are absolutely vital to the survival of the UK population.
They are also vital to the choice of holiday destinations for your local GP.
-
Target driven bastards cussing:
What was that hospital in Staffs?
-
I am afraid to say it is now a business, the money your surgery gets has to be earned etc, also they can have money taken off etc for not achieving the qof etc. sad but true....
and soon Dr's surgeries are going to be accredited....and gonna have patient participation groups, and if they don't get accredited you could be closed down, so we been told what public wants public can have or else......this is gonna be fun i tell you...
soon we will be able to register at any practice in UK..thats gonna be fun when old Mrs smith wants a visit down in cornwall......
nhs is being bled dry...and don't get me started on all the free nhs care that overseas students entitled too...non EU students, uni gets richer while nhs struggles to care for em.... Banghead
-
Of course Health is devolved in Wales so we have other "issues"
-
Of course Health is devolved in Wales so we have other "issues"
Nothing new there then point:
B.
-
soon we will be able to register at any practice in UK..thats gonna be fun when old Mrs smith wants a visit down in cornwall......
The Tamar time warp can be a little disconcerting, hope she likes leeches..... whistle:
-
Leeches are good
-
AS long as you carry a LeechPoonTM
-
AS long as you carry a LeechPoonTM
Don't get smart! evil:
-
So the good news is that this volcanic ash is being washed down by rain. I can see it on my car cussing:
Bad for jet engines. SHould I be wearing a mask again?
-
So the good news is that this volcanic ash is being washed down by rain. I can see it on my car cussing:
Bad for jet engines. SHould I be wearing a mask again?
You should be safe.
Most of your hot air is outbound.
-
cussing:
-
The report questions whether the pandemic was driven by drug companies seeking a profit.
Nah, can't believe that for one moment, can you? ::)
BASTARDS! Angry9:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1284133/The-pandemic-Drug-firms-encouraged-world-health-body-exaggerate-swine-flu-threat.html?ITO=1490
-
It's in the Daily Mail so ............. No I don't believe it. noooo:
-
It's in the Daily Mail so ............. No I don't believe it. noooo:
I don't give a flying pigs flue where it's reported. Could be the flamin' Bible for all I care. Enough dodgy tales in there too.
However, I do believe that this pig flu was grossly over exagerated, and.... even POSSIBLY, and IMO ....may have been developed secretly and deliberately by scheming lying greedy governments in conjunction with drug companies.
Post edited to cover my own back, seeing as it's currently like dealing with a herd of solicitors at present,
-
...and even developed secretly and deliberately by scheming lying greedy governments in conjunction with drug companies.
shutup:
-
...and even developed secretly and deliberately by scheming lying greedy governments in conjunction with drug companies.
shutup:
Just MY opinion.
Don't expect you to agree with anything I say, ever, but hey ho, I respect that. whistle:
Wouldn't it be so so boring if we all loved and got on with each other ey?
-
Bit like a Coco Cola advert lol:
-
Bit like a Coco Cola advert lol:
The clown version? ;)
-
lol:.....you're all starting with the bleeding clowns now sad24:
-
Not us. noooo:
Well, maybe Nick
-
Well at least THIS wasn't published in the Daily Mail. ::)
http://www.naturalnews.com/026141.html
Seems I'm not actually alone in thinking something perhaps more sinister may have brought this pandemic on.
I'm keeping an open mind, but I don't suppose that'll stop the ridiculing of my opinions.
First known case of swine flu was ALLEDGEDLY confirmed very close to a medical research lab btw. Pure coincidence of course, naturally, and probably a load of old bull, just like the linked article. ::)
-
Swine flu makes an unwelcome return
Jun 7 2010 by Madeleine Brindley, Western Mail
A MAN has been diagnosed with swine flu in North Wales ? five months after the end of the second pandemic wave, the Western Mail can reveal.
The man, who has not been named, was understood to be immuno-suppressed because of an underlying condition when he contracted the H1N1 virus.
Public health experts today said the case did not indicate that swine flu is poised to infect thousands of people in Wales as it did last year. But they warned low levels of the H1N1 virus are circulating alongside other flu viruses.
Dr Brendan Mason, a consultant epidemiologist at Public Health Wales, said: ?If you look across Europe there are a number of flu viruses, including swine flu, circulating at low levels. This is probably quite normal for a summer season.
?But, for whatever reason, whether it?s human behaviour, temperature and humidity or because the virus itself doesn?t take hold, we don?t tend to see large numbers of people falling ill with flu.
?It is there as a source for winter illnesses but when that starts we do not know.?
The current flu consultation rate ? the number of people seeing their GP with flu-like symptoms ? is 1.3 per 100,000.
At the peak of the first wave of pandemic flu, in July 2009, there were more than 150 consultations per 100,000 population.
The new case of swine flu in North Wales brings the number of confirmed cases of H1N1 reported to Public Health Wales since May 2009 to 665, although the actual number of people who have had the virus will be significantly higher.
Of these confirmed cases, 452 people were admitted to hospital and 64 of these were admitted to intensive care or high-dependency units.
There were 28 deaths in Welsh residents who had tested positive for swine flu last year, during the two pandemic waves of infection.
The first case of swine flu in Wales was confirmed in a 31-year-old man from Caerphilly borough who had just returned from the US a year ago at the end of May. Across Europe there has been one swine flu-related death in the past month, taking the European death toll to 4,880 since April 2009.
The World Health Organisation said the most active areas for transmission of swine flu are currently in parts of the Caribbean, Central America and Southeast Asia ? particularly Singapore, Malaysia, and Bangladesh ? where low-level circulation is occurring.
Worldwide there have been some 18,110 deaths.
Dr Mason said how the swine flu virus behaves in the southern hemisphere during the coming months will give an indication of what level of flu activity the northern hemisphere can expect during the winter.
?Last year we saw more flu activity than we had seen in the last 10 years,? he said.
?This year we?re not expecting to see the same levels. A number of people in Wales will either be immune because they have already had the virus or because they have been vaccinated so there will be less susceptible people in the population.
?People in the at-risk groups ? children under five and all those with chronic illnesses ? can still be immunised with the single antigen swine flu vaccination.
?When the seasonal flu vaccine comes on line later this year it will include swine flu and will be targeted at the over-65s.?
The latest figures suggest that 44% of people in the clinical risk groups have had the swine flu jab ? for children under five who are at clinical risk the take-up rate was 52%.
But in otherwise healthy children under five, just 27% have had the vaccine.
Dr Mason added: ?Pandemic flu viruses of the past become the seasonal flu viruses of the future and sometimes they can circulate for decades as the predominant seasonal flu virus.
?Hopefully by the time we get to winter we will be in an even better position in terms of protection.
?We will have higher levels of immunity to protect individuals but that will also have an impact on community transmission.
?We will be better placed than other less well off countries to deal with swine flu.?
-
Shite
-
But it's in the paper angel1
-
Two days of feeling like a zombie, what a weekend noooo:
Can't be swine flu, I've had the jabs.
-
redface:
-
redface:
"Typhoid Nick" noooo:
-
Leviticus 13:45
-
evil:
-
Leviticus 13:45
... at Aintree, 15:4
-
What have you done to him Nicholas ? eeek:
-
Leviticus 13:45
... at Aintree, 15:4
lol: lol: lol:
-
Leviticus 13:45
Clearly you have met him
New International Version (©1984)
"The person with such an infectious disease must wear torn clothes, let his hair be unkempt, cover the lower part of his face and cry out, 'Unclean! Unclean!'
-
evil:
-
Leviticus 13:45
Clearly you have met him
New International Version (©1984)
"The person with such an infectious disease must wear torn clothes, let his hair be unkempt, cover the lower part of his face and cry out, 'Unclean! Unclean!'
Any mention of gingerness?
-
Not as such but apart from crying "Unclean" the description would enable you to pick him out in a line-up.
-
cussing:
-
Oomm Nick has broken Mr P. I'm telling.
Hope that you are feeling better Pastis. happy100
-
Pastis has been very quiet today ~ should we start a collection yet or give it a day or two?
-
Pastis has been very quiet today ~ should we start a collection yet or give it a day or two?
I say start a collection... if he miraculously recovers we can put it in the 'charity' box... ;)
-
Pastis has been very quiet today ~ should we start a collection yet or give it a day or two?
I say start a collection... if he miraculously recovers we can put it in the 'charity' box... ;)
We don't have a charity box ~ since you broke into the last one.
-
Pastis has been very quiet today ~ should we start a collection yet or give it a day or two?
I say start a collection... if he miraculously recovers we can put it in the 'charity' box... ;)
We don't have a charity box ~ since you broke into the last one.
evil:
The blind drunk box then...? whistle:
-
Pastis has been very quiet today ~ should we start a collection yet or give it a day or two?
I say start a collection... if he miraculously recovers we can put it in the 'charity' box... ;)
We don't have a charity box ~ since you broke into the last one.
evil:
The blind drunk box then...? whistle:
rubschin:
-
I just thought I'd leave it a few hours .... whistle:
razz:
-
I just thought I'd leave it a few hours .... whistle:
razz:
AND????????????????? angry041:
-
I can type, can werk, like, but am still suffering a cough and do not enjoy a conversation.
A neighbour phoned me up yesterday and, foregoing pleasantries, how are you etc I replied, Not so good actually, hacking cough and .... She then launched into two technical questions concerning HD TV reception and how she'd been ripped off by Peter Jones eeek: eeek:
I just hmmmmed and yessssed..... too bad noooo: noooo:
-
So you have a summer cold.
Take plenty of fluids, aspirin or paracetamol and get well soon old chap.
See you in a week or so.
Note to BM~ We need another money making scheme, this b*gger is going to survive.
-
It may be that kipper rubschin:
-
It may be that kipper rubschin:
And have you been giving kipper cake to Growler this afternoon?
-
He will never know Sinister:
-
So you have a summer cold.
Take plenty of fluids, aspirin or paracetamol and get well soon old chap.
See you in a week or so.
Note to BM~ We need another money making scheme, this b*gger is going to survive.
rubschin:
-
Two days of feeling like a zombie, what a weekend noooo:
Can't be swine flu, I've had the jabs.
Gingermingeritus. whistle:
-
Two days of feeling like a zombie, what a weekend noooo:
Can't be swine flu, I've had the jabs.
Gingermingeritus. whistle:
lol: lol:
-
cussing:
-
It's officially over. cloud9:
That'll be the strat of it again now then I suppose. ::)
-
New killer bacterium discovered. Resistant to antibiotics. We are all going to die scared2: Doctor in Cardiff insists we give him lots of money to find a cure noooo:
-
How the BBC love a superbug scare... noooo:
-
New killer bacterium discovered. Resistant to antibiotics. We are all going to die scared2: Doctor in Cardiff insists we give him lots of money to find a cure noooo:
Nah that's Snoops on a day out with a great scam.
-
New killer bacterium discovered. Resistant to antibiotics. We are all going to die scared2: Doctor in Cardiff insists we give him lots of money to find a cure noooo:
Another export from the Indian subcontinent, allegedly ::)
-
Swine flu returns (http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/doctors-shocked-by-spread-of-swine-flu-ndash-and-its-severity-2157407.html) , get ready for the media hysteria. Here you go Barman, have your bucket back
-
Swine flu returns (http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/doctors-shocked-by-spread-of-swine-flu-ndash-and-its-severity-2157407.html) , get ready for the media hysteria. Here you go Barman, have your bucket back
Have you cleaned it? eeek:
-
I gave it the same treatment you gave it before passing it to me whistle:
-
I gave it the same treatment you gave it before passing it to me whistle:
Eeewwww! sick2:
-
I heard of the first diagnosed case in our area yesterday.
I shall now spend next week dusting off the body bags. noooo:
-
What's it going to be this winter then? Feline flu or what? Popcorn:
-
Fuel poverty flu noooo:
-
Fuel poverty flu noooo:
We have a winner! :thumbsup:
-
It might see Her Maj off this time rubschin:
-
surrender: Just escaped from the horsepickle. surrender:
-
Now what? eeek:
-
Building up her "Frequent Patient Miles" I expect.
It takes at least 6000 to get invited to the staff Christmas Party.
-
surrender: Just escaped from the horsepickle. surrender:
happy100
-
Hope all is OK Miss C happy100
-
happy100
At least you go often enough that they dont have to fill in all your details every visit.
Probably got a stack of photocopied Miss C admission forms with just the "Wot's up this time" box left blank. ;)
-
happy100
At least you go often enough that they dont have to fill in all your details every visit.
Probably got a stack of photocopied Miss C admission forms with just the "Wot's up this time" box left blank. ;)
She prolly keeps that plastic wrist band on too.... rubschin:
-
happy100
At least you go often enough that they dont have to fill in all your details every visit.
Probably got a stack of photocopied Miss C admission forms with just the "Wot's up this time" box left blank. ;)
She prolly keeps that plastic wrist band on too.... rubschin:
Yes I do that, helps me remember my name.
-
happy100
At least you go often enough that they dont have to fill in all your details every visit.
Probably got a stack of photocopied Miss C admission forms with just the "Wot's up this time" box left blank. ;)
She prolly keeps that plastic wrist band on too.... rubschin:
Yes I do that, helps me remember my name.
That must be handy Wexham...? whistle:
-
It might see Her Maj off this time rubschin:
The BBC already has plans in place. eeek:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2055259/BBC-staff-receive-training-preparation-Queens-death.html (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2055259/BBC-staff-receive-training-preparation-Queens-death.html)
-
We dust off the signs every so often
-
wOT SIGNS? eeek:
-
wOT SIGNS? eeek:
Yes, what signs?
I expect they have a stock of 'Caution Wide Load' for Fergie, but Liz is tiny.
-
Evidently you are well acquainted
-
Evidently you are well acquainted
She doen't care for Hobnobs
-
Or even "doesn't" whistle:
-
Or even "doesn't" whistle:
The Battenberg accent alows that. ;)
-
CAKE cloud9:
-
CAKE cloud9:
Let them eat bread
-
wOT SIGNS? eeek:
In the event of a royal funeral/wedding in Windsor or London there are set locations for the public to park, and they have to be directed to these sites, that's where we come in. Obviously, with a wedding we have a lot of notice, but with a funeral we don't have that "luxury"
-
SO wot do they say?
-
SO wot do they say?
The Queen is dead...Long live the Queen?
-
Nothing fancy, just along the lines of "Funeral car parking" with different destinations/routes in for cars and coaches
We also have arrangements for the evacuation of London (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Sassoon) in case of terrorist attack
-
Camilla eeek:
-
wOT SIGNS? eeek:
In the event of a royal funeral/wedding in Windsor or London there are set locations for the public to park, and they have to be directed to these sites, that's where we come in. Obviously, with a wedding we have a lot of notice, but with a funeral we don't have that "luxury"
rubschin:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.co.uk%2Furl%3Fsource%3Dimglanding%26amp%3Bct%3Dimg%26amp%3Bq%3Dhttp%3A%2F%2Ffarm5.static.flickr.com%2F4085%2F4998319887_32bf7b19db_o.jpg%26amp%3Bsa%3DX%26amp%3Bei%3DlXquTtD3Nc7HsgaWtuXlDw%26amp%3Bved%3D0CAsQ8wc%26amp%3Busg%3DAFQjCNFNIV1kHzsgZCPMm-aPencQqutAuA&hash=70a2b50ffe8a96d63e5cd01aee93e9bf289721fb)
-
I see there is a variant that is perfect for the regulars here:
(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fa2.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net%2Fhphotos-ak-snc7%2Fs320x320%2F386488_254594974593515_244753448911001_741254_1616382126_n.jpg&hash=3c58e2a82d47231b462054135428e8cf1bfa70fe)
-
:thumbsup: