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Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Miss Demeanour on December 15, 2009, 10:39:45 AM

Title: Britshit Airways
Post by: Miss Demeanour on December 15, 2009, 10:39:45 AM
The annual exodus of escaping Brits wishing to avoid dry Turkey dinners, brussel sprouts, vile stuffing, disgusting Christmas pudding, the stormy , wet , windy weather and their kids sitting like Zombies on their X Boxes, Playstations and new mobile phones, FORGET IT!

The annual "Britshit Airways" Christmas strike is upon us causing even more misery at overcrowded airports, R*an Air check-ins, over-expensive Starbucks, filthy, stinking bogs and nowhere to sit!

"Thankyou "Britshit Airways" you've f****d my holiday and forced me to stay in the country nobody ever wants to be in at Christmas!"

"Now I'll have to suffer the Queens message, and crap TV shows instead of laying on the beach in Turkey (non-dry type!) or skiing through the powder snow in Switzerland (Minaret free!) enjoying the gourmet pleasures of the Cote D Azur, or Italien Pasta, Bella, pina col?das in Florida, and it's all your f*****g fault!"

Screamed thousands of stranded Brit Exodites on hearing the news!

R*an Air are trying to accomodate stranded BA passengers and have "dirt cheap" offers (?0.19) on their flights to the "Sunny South" only problems are, the added costs:

A seat cost ?100 xtra, visit to the bog = ?10, cup of shite coffee ?6, toilet paper ?4, seat belts ?7,50, look up the stewardesses skirt ?25, paying the pilot to land the plane ?50 per passenger, safety demo ?10 and last not least, putting the stairs against the plane when landed ?5 per passenger!

BA you bastards!!!!!



 lol: lol: lol:

Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: tel on December 15, 2009, 10:42:08 AM
I don't care, I'm not going anywhere  lol:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Snoopy on December 15, 2009, 10:46:43 AM
Likewise tel ~ sod the lot of them, good for BA staff, jetting off on holiday over Christmas  noooo: ... bloody traitors to their country if you ask me. What's wrong with a Christmas of repeat TV shows, soggy sprouts and Aunt Nellie coming for tea on Boxing day?  lol:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Miss Demeanour on December 15, 2009, 10:48:06 AM
There are a few unhappy souls here in the office today.....checking flights , trying to rearrange plans , wincing at the prices of alternative flights when they are available  happy100
 
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Nick on December 15, 2009, 10:49:09 AM
I am at the mercy of fooking Virgin Trains. If they went on strike it would be hard to tell the difference from their usual service  evil:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Snoopy on December 15, 2009, 11:16:22 AM
I am at the mercy of fooking Virgin Trains. If they went on strike it would be hard to tell the difference from their usual service  evil:

You have a perfectly serviceable thumb ..... I used to hitch the length and breadth of the Kingdom.
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Barman on December 15, 2009, 11:29:21 AM
My guests are were coming out on Xmas eve with BA...  noooo:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Nick on December 15, 2009, 11:32:22 AM
I am at the mercy of fooking Virgin Trains. If they went on strike it would be hard to tell the difference from their usual service  evil:

You have a perfectly serviceable thumb ..... I used to hitch the length and breadth of the Kingdom.

Prolly in uniform  ::) I survived on hitching for years as a student, but I never see on nowadays  noooo: I guess they all have railcards or summat. Wimps!
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Barman on December 15, 2009, 11:38:16 AM
I am at the mercy of fooking Virgin Trains. If they went on strike it would be hard to tell the difference from their usual service  evil:

You have a perfectly serviceable thumb ..... I used to hitch the length and breadth of the Kingdom.

Prolly in uniform  ::) I survived on hitching for years as a student, but I never see on nowadays  noooo: I guess they all have railcards or summat. Wimps!
Or murdered by lorry drivers...  noooo:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Nick on December 15, 2009, 11:39:34 AM
True, I did have one or two squeaks in my hitchhiking days, but not murdered as far as I know
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Miss Demeanour on December 15, 2009, 12:02:39 PM
My guests are were coming out on Xmas eve with BA...  noooo:

Glad I didn't book now  lol:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Snoopy on December 15, 2009, 12:03:00 PM
True, I did have one or two squeaks in my hitchhiking days, but not murdered as far as I know

Ah ~ The old "Sorry, missed the gear stick" story eh?
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Barman on December 15, 2009, 12:06:53 PM
My guests are were coming out on Xmas eve with BA...  noooo:

Glad I didn't book now  lol:

Ah... but think of all the extra chocolates....  whistle:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Miss Demeanour on December 15, 2009, 12:07:44 PM

Ah ~ The old "Sorry, missed the gear stick" story eh?

That was my Driving instructor  eeek:

Regular driving lessons on a Wednesday  - pick me up at 11 - drive into the countryside for a pub lunch -  drive home for about 2 - 3 pm depending on what other lessons he had.

Nothing ever happened - not for his want of trying - but I was getting a 3 hour driving lesson for the price of one with lunch thrown in and could rebutt his suggestive comments and actions even then  whistle:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Nick on December 15, 2009, 01:04:10 PM
 scared2:

I assume you learnt to drive in a tractor/combine harvester or similar  scared2:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Uncle Mort on December 15, 2009, 01:09:53 PM

Ah ~ The old "Sorry, missed the gear stick" story eh?

That was my Driving instructor  eeek:

Regular driving lessons on a Wednesday  - pick me up at 11 - drive into the countryside for a pub lunch -  drive home for about 2 - 3 pm depending on what other lessons he had.

Nothing ever happened - not for his want of trying - but I was getting a 3 hour driving lesson for the price of one with lunch thrown in and could rebutt his suggestive comments and actions even then  whistle:

Have you seen Mike Leigh's "Happy Go Lucky"?
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Miss Demeanour on December 15, 2009, 01:17:54 PM
Yes I have  lol:

He was not that bad  lol: - not so much a loony just a perv
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Nick on December 15, 2009, 01:38:38 PM
You seem to attract pervs for some reason  rubschin:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Miss Demeanour on December 15, 2009, 01:41:11 PM
Eh  eeek: ...how is that then  rubschin:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Nick on December 15, 2009, 01:47:27 PM
Like Growler, like  whistle:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Snoopy on December 15, 2009, 02:07:17 PM
 rubschin: But Growler isn't moving the London in order to get invited to lunch  whistle:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Nick on December 15, 2009, 02:11:38 PM
Even an enraged Growler could not move London, prolly, like
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Snoopy on December 15, 2009, 04:42:15 PM
Yeah Yeah ~ And you never make typos eh?  noooo:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: GROWLER on December 15, 2009, 11:24:50 PM
Like Growler, like  whistle:

Thanks mate evil:

How exactly do you come to the incorrect conclusion that I'm a 'perv' then ey? HOW?
A perv is someone who secretly letches I thought.

Apology will possibly be accepted when forthcoming.

Also, wouldn't  want to live in or near London at anytime, but especially now you're going down there, flamin' great mouse faced jessie. ::)

I shall be going out for a crimbo eve drink on my own this year. Bliss. cloud9:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Miss Demeanour on December 16, 2009, 08:13:12 AM
Apparently Snoops has got loads to drink and willing to share Growler  ;)
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Nick on December 16, 2009, 09:03:15 AM
Growler's profile says he is female. Closet unconvincing transvestite?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: GROWLER on December 16, 2009, 09:04:58 AM
Apparently Snoops has got loads to drink and willing to share Growler  ;)

Good of you to invite me.  ::)

I'm always welcome at the Kennel apparently, and Mrs Snoops#2....never understood what the hash is for tbqath  noooo:....thinks I'm cuddly, apparently, so he says like.  Shrugs:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: GROWLER on December 16, 2009, 09:06:03 AM
Growler's profile says he is female. Closet unconvincing transvestite?  rubschin:

You are starting to irritate me YET again.

Please piss off, thank you. happy088
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Nick on December 16, 2009, 09:06:56 AM
Moi?  angel1
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: GROWLER on December 16, 2009, 09:08:23 AM
Moi?  angel1

Most correct. happy088


DO IT/ ONE! Banghead
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Nick on December 16, 2009, 09:09:42 AM
So are you really female?
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Snoopy on December 16, 2009, 09:45:52 AM
Apparently Snoops has got loads to drink and willing to share Growler  ;)

Good of you to invite me.  ::)

I'm always welcome at the Kennel apparently, and Mrs Snoops#2....never understood what the hash is for tbqath  noooo:....thinks I'm cuddly, apparently, so he says like.  Shrugs:


(i) Growler is always welcome at the kennel
(ii) The hash (#) is a nasty American way of saying "Number"
(iii) Mrs S#2 does indeed think he is a very nice man. Her exact words having met you were "What a pleasant chap, thought you said he was bearlike ....  rubschin: he is rather cuddly I suppose"
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: GROWLER on December 16, 2009, 10:23:43 AM
Apparently Snoops has got loads to drink and willing to share Growler  ;)

Good of you to invite me.  ::)

I'm always welcome at the Kennel apparently, and Mrs Snoops#2....never understood what the hash is for tbqath  noooo:....thinks I'm cuddly, apparently, so he says like.  Shrugs:


(i) Growler is always welcome at the kennel
(ii) The hash (#) is a nasty American way of saying "Number"
(iii) Mrs S#2 does indeed think he is a very nice man. Her exact words having met you were "What a pleasant chap, thought you said he was bearlike ....  rubschin: he is rather cuddly I suppose"

 redface:

I do try...sometimes. If folk are pleasant to me I see that as a bonus and respond accordingly.

I expect the worst from most though, and am rarely disappointed tbh. Shrugs:

Call me an overly cynical old bastard if you want. ::)
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: GROWLER on December 16, 2009, 10:25:29 AM
Cuddly. rubschin:


Fat. ::)
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Snoopy on December 16, 2009, 10:27:08 AM
Cuddly. rubschin:


Fat. ::)

Well she has been known to tell me I am cuddly too ............ so draw your own conclusions.
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Nick on December 16, 2009, 10:28:27 AM
Cuddly. rubschin:


Fat. ::)
point:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Snoopy on December 16, 2009, 10:30:29 AM
PS She also found Nick "Charming and a bit boisterous .... like an overgrown Labrador puppy ~ you know, wagging his tail furiously whilst completely unaware that he is destroying the whole room"
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Nick on December 16, 2009, 10:31:28 AM
That's because I brought that rocket!
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Snoopy on December 16, 2009, 10:32:23 AM
That didn't help  noooo:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: GROWLER on December 16, 2009, 10:34:12 AM
Cuddly. rubschin:


Fat. ::)
point:


'Least I haven't got rancid scruffy face fungus with the remnants of last nights dinner still in it. sick2:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Nick on December 16, 2009, 10:35:44 AM
 cussing:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: tel on December 16, 2009, 10:39:54 AM
Shouldn't you have your own little play area thread?
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Snoopy on December 16, 2009, 10:44:38 AM
Shouldn't you have your own little play area thread?

<snigger>
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Miss Demeanour on December 17, 2009, 04:14:30 PM
Looks like your guests will be arriving after all BM

The British Airways cabin crew strike will not take place this Christmas after the airline was granted an emergency injunction preventing the planned 12-day walk-out.

Almost a million passengers had faced misery during the holiday season because of grounded aircraft but were given a reprieve by the High Court today who ruled that the ballot of members was illegal.


Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: GROWLER on December 17, 2009, 04:18:48 PM
Gonna be top notch first class helpful obliging cabin crew service on all flights over crimbo then ey?  whistle:

Think I'd rather walk tbh.
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: The Moan Ranger on December 17, 2009, 04:44:31 PM
And so what if the cabin crew did strike? Why does that stop a plane taking off and landing? It would save money with less fuel being used with fewer people on board. Do we really need these raddled slappers or mincing queens blocking up the aisles trying to get us to buy overpriced tat?  Safety demonstration? Put a video on.

Are there really that many passengers who don't know how to put the seat-belt on?

Food? Just tell passengers to bring a packed lunch for longer flights and put a few vending machines on for drinks.

Pissed-up bloke causing a racket? Without the irritating finger wagging of the trolley dollies, I'm sure a suitable number of other passengers would issue swift justice.

You could probably even have a ciggy without being accused of polluting the air that is already laden with carcenogenic particulates of oil used within the scavenger system.

Cabin crew. Fuck 'em I say.
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Barman on December 17, 2009, 04:45:51 PM
And so what if the cabin crew did strike? Why does that stop a plane taking off and landing? It would save money with less fuel being used with fewer people on board. Do we really need these raddled slappers or mincing queens blocking up the aisles trying to get us to buy overpriced tat?  Safety demonstration? Put a video on.

Are there really that many passengers who don't know how to put the seat-belt on?

Food? Just tell passengers to bring a packed lunch for longer flights and put a few vending machines on for drinks.

Pissed-up bloke causing a racket? Without the irritating finger wagging of the trolley dollies, I'm sure a suitable number of other passengers would issue swift justice.

You could probably even have a ciggy without being accused of polluting the air that is already laden with carcenogenic particulates of oil used within the scavenger system.

Cabin crew. Fuck 'em I say.


All of them...?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Darwins Selection on December 17, 2009, 04:49:18 PM
And so what if the cabin crew did strike? Why does that stop a plane taking off and landing? It would save money with less fuel being used with fewer people on board. Do we really need these raddled slappers or mincing queens blocking up the aisles trying to get us to buy overpriced tat?  Safety demonstration? Put a video on.

Are there really that many passengers who don't know how to put the seat-belt on?

Food? Just tell passengers to bring a packed lunch for longer flights and put a few vending machines on for drinks.

Pissed-up bloke causing a racket? Without the irritating finger wagging of the trolley dollies, I'm sure a suitable number of other passengers would issue swift justice.

You could probably even have a ciggy without being accused of polluting the air that is already laden with carcenogenic particulates of oil used within the scavenger system.

Cabin crew. Fuck 'em I say.


All of them...?  rubschin:

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F3.bp.blogspot.com%2F_SKx0fNQMLYo%2FSFKSjVk5HRI%2FAAAAAAAABcM%2FzXyfYc_gVds%2Fs400%2Fgay%2Bflight%2Batt.bmp.jpg&hash=d36883739b88bbe13342c34a1122f1c5f0fa2392)

 eeek: eeek: eeek:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Barman on December 17, 2009, 04:51:01 PM
Looks like your guests will be arriving after all BM

The British Airways cabin crew strike will not take place this Christmas after the airline was granted an emergency injunction preventing the planned 12-day walk-out.

Almost a million passengers had faced misery during the holiday season because of grounded aircraft but were given a reprieve by the High Court today who ruled that the ballot of members was illegal.



I know!  eeek:

We'll have to return to the supermarket now - I refused to let LL 'stock up' today in case they didn't come...  redface:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: GROWLER on December 17, 2009, 04:51:31 PM
And so what if the cabin crew did strike? Why does that stop a plane taking off and landing? It would save money with less fuel being used with fewer people on board. Do we really need these raddled slappers or mincing queens blocking up the aisles trying to get us to buy overpriced tat?  Safety demonstration? Put a video on.

Are there really that many passengers who don't know how to put the seat-belt on?

Food? Just tell passengers to bring a packed lunch for longer flights and put a few vending machines on for drinks.

Pissed-up bloke causing a racket? Without the irritating finger wagging of the trolley dollies, I'm sure a suitable number of other passengers would issue swift justice.

You could probably even have a ciggy without being accused of polluting the air that is already laden with carcenogenic particulates of oil used within the scavenger system.

Cabin crew. Fuck 'em I say.


All of them...?  rubschin:

Most of them travel on 'the other bus' anyway, so yes, I suppose you could.
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Miss Demeanour on December 18, 2009, 01:21:57 PM
So who's going to risk booking a flight in January with BA at ridiculously cheap prices because no bugger will trust that they won't be on strike or in administration by the time they are due to fly  rubschin:
Title: Re: Britshit Airways
Post by: Barman on December 18, 2009, 01:25:15 PM
So who's going to risk booking a flight in January with BA at ridiculously cheap prices because no bugger will trust that they won't be on strike or in administration by the time they are due to fly  rubschin:
Not me....  noooo:

I never use them now - Cyprus Airways are much better...