The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: GROWLER on December 27, 2009, 01:14:56 PM
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Look, I like dogs...generally speaking...but I DO NOT like other peoples dogs bounding up to me like some long lost master, and then taking a dive at my chest, muddy paws first. cussing:
"oh, don't worry, he won't bite, he's just being friendly!"
Well you rabid munting dog infatuated nerd, I'M NOT friendly, and I DO bite. OK? Explode:
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Why do they always say "he doesn't bite"? ................ All fecking dogs bite if they feel like it cussing:
My best encounter was when I was a postie ....... Dog bounded up and took a lump outta me arm. Owner said "He's never bitten anyone before".
As I wrapped a hankie round the bleeding wound on my wrist I replied, with what I still feel was commendable dignity, "No madam, and he'll never do it again" .... The dog was put down, by order of the local magistrates court, a week later.
The moral of that tale ...... If your dog has to bite a postman make sure he doesn't take a nip at the Secretary of the local branch of the Union of Communication Workers eveilgrin:
Especially when one of the magistrates is the Chief Inspector at the same sorting office whistle:
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I had to go into a customers house when I worked for Brit. Gas, many years ago.
She had one of those nasty snappy tiny little brown apologies for being a dog rug rats, you know, the ones ALL blue rinsed oap overly self opinionated living alone and members of the wimmins institute and knitting / cake making club have. They nurse caress and kiss them all the time, and talk to them as though they are 3 year old kiddy winks. sick2:
It came snapping and yapping at me, and she said the usual. "oh, he won't bite you"
The little nasty 4 legged rat rug twat did though, right on me ankle. It wasn't big enough to bite anywhere else though, rancid rabid nasty little bastard it was. evil:
As soon as the owner turned her back on me and went out of the room, I bloody well launched it courtesy of my boot right in the nuts.
It slithered off whimpering. Never saw it again. whistle: