The Virtual Pub

Come Inside... => Saloon Bar => Topic started by: Barman on August 20, 2010, 05:41:50 AM

Title: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Barman on August 20, 2010, 05:41:50 AM
LL was shopping in Windsor yesterday...

She parked her car and followed her usual habit of storing the parking ticket safely in her cigarette packet...  ::)

An hour later she returns to the car (no doubt encumbered by bags containing dresses and shoes noooo:) to find a newly opened packet of cigarettes in her handbag and no parking ticket - she had thrown it away!  lol:

So, she returns to the shopping centre and starts rummaging through the bin where she thought she had thrown the last packet away...  sick2:

A Mum sitting nearby with a baby in a pushchair sees her and says: -

"Would you like to share my sandwich dearie?"

 point:

She returned ticket-less to the parking office to be told that the lost ticket fee was £20!  eeek:

Whereupon she politely explained to the attendant that he could stick his £20 up his arse and check the CCTV to see when she actually arrived - Result, £5 parking charge!  lol:
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: GROWLER on August 20, 2010, 06:44:54 AM
LL was shopping in Windsor yesterday...

She parked her car and followed her usual habit of storing the parking ticket safely in her cigarette packet...  ::)

An hour later she returns to the car (no doubt encumbered by bags containing dresses and shoes noooo:) to find a newly opened packet of cigarettes in her handbag and no parking ticket - she had thrown it away!  lol:

So, she returns to the shopping centre and starts rummaging through the bin where she thought she had thrown the last packet away...  sick2:

A Mum sitting nearby with a baby in a pushchair sees her and says: -

"Would you like to share my sandwich dearie?"  

 point:

She returned ticket-less to the parking office to be told that the lost ticket fee was £20!  eeek:

Whereupon she politely explained to the attendant that he could stick his £20 up his arse and check the CCTV to see when she actually arrived - Result, £5 parking charge!  lol:


Class! happy001

Oh, we can't wait for her return. cloud9:
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Bar Wench on August 24, 2010, 06:12:48 PM
My Dad did this at the airport once after he, Brother Wench and I dropped Mother Wench at the airport. He made us spend two hours turning every bin out at the airport. It was BEYOND embarrassment!
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Barman on August 24, 2010, 06:20:30 PM
My Dad did this at the airport once after he, Brother Wench and I dropped Mother Wench at the airport. He made us spend two hours turning every bin out at the airport. It was BEYOND embarrassment!

 point:
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Bar Wench on August 24, 2010, 06:28:22 PM
We didn't find it either. The bins had been emptied so he made me go and find the janitor and ask.  redface:
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Nick on August 24, 2010, 06:49:39 PM
WENCHY  cloud9: I have just been thinking about one of the most embarrassing things that ever happened to me  redface:
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Miss Demeanour on August 24, 2010, 06:54:45 PM
Was it with Wenchy then ?  eeek:
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: GROWLER on August 24, 2010, 07:50:29 PM
WENCHYIO!  cloud9:
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Nick on August 24, 2010, 08:14:47 PM
Was it with Wenchy then ?  eeek:

i TOLD YOU, YOU MUPPET
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Grumpmeister on August 24, 2010, 08:27:36 PM
Was it with Wenchy then ?  eeek:

i TOLD YOU, YOU MUPPET

(https://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.freakingnews.com%2Fpictures%2F41000%2FMuppet-Warming-41302.jpg&hash=dce0ab1be6c3f135f0dd7b05ab868b662790a384)
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Miss Demeanour on August 24, 2010, 08:32:57 PM
Was it with Wenchy then ?  eeek:

i TOLD YOU, YOU MUPPET

Yes just now but not before I posted that you bumbo ( male equivalent of bimbo)  whistle:
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Grumpmeister on August 24, 2010, 08:34:31 PM
I thought that was a himbo Miss D?  rubschin:
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Miss Demeanour on August 24, 2010, 08:35:44 PM
Not in these parts  whistle:

They would prolly take that to mean something quite macho  lol:
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Barman on August 25, 2010, 04:35:38 AM
Was it with Wenchy then ?  eeek:

i TOLD YOU, YOU MUPPET

 Popcorn: Popcorn: Popcorn:
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Uncle Mort on August 25, 2010, 07:51:03 AM
What is all this shite?
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: GROWLER on August 25, 2010, 07:59:55 AM
What is all this shite?
Buggered if I know either chief. Shrugs:

I think there's a secret glue sniffin' club in here tbh.
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Darwins Selection on August 25, 2010, 08:12:00 AM
What is all this shite?
Buggered if I know either chief. Shrugs:

I think there's a secret glue sniffin' club in here tbh.

I don't think it is glue.  noooo:
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Snoopy on August 25, 2010, 08:38:44 AM
 ::) You see BM ~ I was right, put less water in the beer and just look what happens!
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Barman on August 25, 2010, 11:51:52 AM
::) You see BM ~ I was right, put less water in the beer and just look what happens!

You were right...  noooo:
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Grumpmeister on August 25, 2010, 02:19:13 PM
I stopped drinking the beer once I noticed the pipe running from the toilets to the bar.  noooo:
Title: Re: Landlady the Baglady
Post by: Snoopy on August 25, 2010, 02:21:53 PM
That's our recycling plant  evil:


All our beer has been passed by at least 6 other members before it gets to you.