The Virtual Pub
Come Inside... => The Snug => Topic started by: Barman on October 22, 2010, 03:10:20 PM
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1. Don't wash yer bright red 'Jackass' tee shirt wiv all the other stuff like... noooo:
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rubschin: I wonder who would have given him that Tee Shirt.
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Never wash orange rugs in the washer, like, especially with LL's undies in there, like whistle:
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Never wash orange rugs in the washer, like, especially with LL's undies in there, like whistle:
You've got a ginger rug? point:
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Never open a champagne cork with your teeth.
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Never open a champagne cork with your teeth.
Use someone else's razz:
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Never open a champagne cork with your teeth.
How about a champagne bottle...? rubschin:
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Never open a champagne cork with your teeth.
How about a champagne bottle...? rubschin:
doh:
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Never open a champagne cork with your teeth.
How about a champagne bottle...? rubschin:
doh:
;D
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It's been one of those dislecksick sort of days. surrender:
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It's been one of those dislecksick sort of days. surrender:
We can see that... whistle:
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It's good to see that you have been paying attention.
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It's good to see that you have been paying attention.
Oh yes... angel1
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The Dyson manual states 'Don't have the machine above you on the stairs' for a reason... evil:
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<snigger>
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point: point: point: point:
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sad32:
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If the bendy sucky tube on your hoover gets blocked and you use water to flush it out make sure all the water is out before turning the hoover back on again noooo:
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doh:
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If the bendy sucky tube on your hoover gets blocked and you use water to flush it out make sure all the water is out before turning the hoover back on again noooo:
point: point: point: point:
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Not to worry ~ it'll drown the ladybirds.
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Not to worry ~ it'll drown the ladybirds.
drumroll:
lol: lol: lol:
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Never shove a fork down the waste disposal whilst it is in action. redface:
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Don't try to mend the kitchen with superglue. In fact, don't try to mend ANYTHING with superglue
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Don't try to mend the kitchen with superglue. In fact, don't try to mend ANYTHING with superglue
Except severed fingers
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Don't try to mend the kitchen with superglue. In fact, don't try to mend ANYTHING with superglue
Except severed fingers
eeek:
Darwin speaks the truth like... rubschin:
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It is always better not to stand under a garage door when it is dropping off. sad24:
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eeek: You didn't?
Popcorn:
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Oh bugger I missed out the word door, now sorted. redface:
Yep it is an 'up and over' door and it jumped out of it's runners whilst I was trying to close it.
Not quite as dramatic as a whole garage is it? redface:
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But still painful! happy100
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If you run out of washing up liquid DO NOT reach for anything that you imagine might be a sort of substitute redface:
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eeek: What?
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plus...do not put washing up liquid in your windscreen washer bottle... noooo:
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I used windscreen washer stuff for washing up noooo:
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sick2:
Leave those things you have washed up to one side, buy washing up liquid and thoroughly wash and rinse them again. If not you could be very sick2: sick2:
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I used windscreen washer stuff for washing up noooo:
Really? whistle:
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I used windscreen washer stuff for washing up noooo:
NASA sent Nick and two chimps into space.
Radio messages were as follows;
NASA to chimp 1.... Optimise life support systems and recalibrate radiation monitoring equipment.
NASA to chimp 2.... Check trajectory and compensate if required using formula (m2-3n) x (5-m3).
NASA to Nick......
FEED CHIMPS, TOUCH F**K ALL!!!!!!!
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It's the coffee jug that bothers me noooo:
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lol: lol: lol:
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When trying to listen to 'stuff' on YouTube through ear phones remember to plug them in. redface:
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When trying to listen to 'stuff' on YouTube through ear phones remember to plug them in. redface:
point:
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You may well laugh but I can't hear you as I have my headphones plugged in. angel1
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You may well laugh but I can't hear you as I have my headphones plugged in. angel1
Well now you do... ::)
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Pardon.
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Pardon.
I said "Well now you do..." ::)
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There's no need to shout you know. I'm not deaf. ::)
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There's no need to shout you know. I'm not deaf. ::)
doh:
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When your bath is not emptying very quickly go to the supermarket and buy some of them granules like.
Do not use 98% sulphuric acid from your mate. It takes the lacquer off of your plastic bath and melts the waste pipe. redface:
The people downstairs are not too impressed with their ceiling. whistle:
Anyone know a good plumber? surrender:
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Oh dear. I know Pete the Polish plumber but it's a bit far for him to come like. noooo:
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When your bath is not emptying very quickly go to the supermarket and buy some of them granules like.
Do not use 98% sulphuric acid from your mate. It takes the lacquer off of your plastic bath and melts the waste pipe. redface:
The people downstairs are not too impressed with their ceiling. whistle:
Anyone know a good plumber? surrender:
lol: lol: lol:
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My mate signed up for one of those 'learn to be a plumber in 6 weeks' courses you see in the papers. His final exam was at 9am yesterday. He turned up at 3pm looked at the exam paper and said.....''looks like I am going to need a pen for this job, I will have to pop round to my suppliers for one. Be right back.''
He came top of his class!..........
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My mate signed up for one of those 'learn to be a plumber in 6 weeks' courses you see in the papers. His final exam was at 9am yesterday. He turned up at 3pm looked at the exam paper and said.....''looks like I am going to need a pen for this job, I will have to pop round to my suppliers for one. Be right back.''
He came top of his class!..........
happy001