I answer it "Hello"
Voice "This is Job Centre Plus ~ I would like to speak to Mrs Snoopy"
Me "I'm afraid that is not possible at the moment ~ can I help?"
Voice "No I NEED to speak to Mrs Snoopy"
Me "What about ~ I'll tell her you called"
Voice "Oh I can't do that, I HAVE to speak to her"
Me "I've already told you that is not possible ~ do you wish to leave a message?"
Voice "When will she be in?"
Me "She is in now"
Voice "But you said she was out"
Me "No I didn't, I said you could not speak to her now"
Voice "Well why can't I speak to her?"
Me "Because she does not wish to speak to you until she knows what you want to speak about ~ she is a very busy person you know, she can't waste time talking to people who are not prepared to divulge their business"
Voice "When would it be convenient to speak to her?"
Me "Just as soon as you tell me what you want ~ I'll tell her and she will then decide if she wishes to speak to you or not"
Voice "Who are you?"
Me "Who are you?"
Voice "I am the Job Centre Plus"
Me "What all of it?"
Voice "No, I work at Job Centre Plus"
Me "And your name would be?"
Voice "I don't have to tell you that"
Me "Then get off my phone"
Voice "But ......."
Me "I am not going to continue a call with a nameless person ~ Goodbye" . BRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
Mrs Snoopy exiting bathroom "Who was that on the phone"
Me "Job Centre Plus ~ they wanted to speak to you"
Mrs Snoopy "Why?"
Me "They refused to say"
Mrs Snoopy "Fuck 'em then"
We do actually know what they want ~ they have been trying for weeks to get her to go for an interview with them, because she is listed as my carer. What they cannot get their silly heads round is that she is also employed, pays NIC and Income Tax and attends University. I have explained all this to various of their supervisors but they want her to do a "Getting back into Work Course". That she is not out of work and therefore does not need their course baffles them. They threatened to stop her benefits the other week "because she hasn't been for an interview". I have pointed out that they can stop her benefits, if they can find them, but she doesn't claim any benefits so there is nothing for them to withhold. Each one we speak to agrees that it is a nonsense and promises to sort it out but still the calls come in. I am beginning to think that they use us as a training exercise for any new employees in their office. "'ere ring this awkward sod and see if you can get past him" sort of thing.
