When you wish upon a star ..................

[Snoopy]

There is a woman at work who once December hits insists on wearing a bit of reindeer antlers round the office. She is 'not right' anyway if you know what I mean 

She is extremely overweight and waddles slowly  from one leg to the other ...so when sitting at your desk you are forewarned nice and early of her imminent arrival as you can see this furry antlers see sawing towards you.

I have looked up the corporate dress code and  there is nothing that prevents her from doing this 

I thought you worked for a Local Authority not for a mental health secure unit.
  Although I accept that some may argue that they are one and the same thing/.

Try just telling the wummun she looks a bloody fool and everyone is laughing at her. 

[Miss Demeanour]

She doesn't work in our section so it's not my place to do so 

She just waddles our side of the floor because the ladies are located here.

She is mahooosive ...and the other day shuffled past with a black T shirt with huge gold sequinned letters saying 'Elvis loves me'