Author Topic: A Classic from Minor  (Read 2582 times)

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Offline Snoopy

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A Classic from Minor
« on: January 09, 2012, 04:15:17 PM »
Sooooo ~ Minor comes home on the School Bus and approaches the front door. He doesn't look particularly happy.

Woodstock lets him in and says "Had a good day?"

He replies "I have had a day soooooo full of arseholery it is unbelievable"

Woodstock says "Is that a word?"

Minor replies "If it isn't it should be" and wanders to the kitchen muttering "Arseholery: verb to describe the behaviour of teachers"


I'm certain Dr Johnson would have approved.
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Online Nick

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Re: A Classic from Minor
« Reply #1 on: January 09, 2012, 04:25:23 PM »
Noam Chomsky would say it is a word now! :thumbsup:
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Offline Pastis

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Re: A Classic from Minor
« Reply #2 on: January 09, 2012, 04:55:19 PM »
 ;D   Capital!
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Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: A Classic from Minor
« Reply #3 on: January 09, 2012, 05:50:46 PM »
You must be very proud of the lad.  :thumbsup:
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Offline Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)

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Re: A Classic from Minor
« Reply #4 on: January 09, 2012, 08:16:52 PM »
Sooooo ~ Minor comes home on the School Bus and approaches the front door. He doesn't look particularly happy.

Woodstock lets him in and says "Had a good day?"

He replies "I have had a day soooooo full of arseholery it is unbelievable"

Woodstock says "Is that a word?"

Minor replies "If it isn't it should be" and wanders to the kitchen muttering "Arseholery: verb to describe the behaviour of teachers"


I'm certain Dr Johnson would have approved.

Most excellent.  The lad will go far me thinks.
I have always thought that the worst thing about drowning was having to call 'help!' You must look such a fool. It's put me against drowning.
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Offline beerhead

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Re: A Classic from Minor
« Reply #5 on: January 09, 2012, 10:49:30 PM »
Well done Minimus: Literate, accurate, pointed.
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: A Classic from Minor
« Reply #6 on: January 10, 2012, 10:19:09 AM »
The lad was telling me, over breakfast this morning, that they often have a sudden lesson change.
Yesterday he toddled along to what he anticipated would be a Geography lesson and the teacher introduced , in the boy's words "Some old fart who claimed to have been a businessman for 50 years who was going to talk to us about the importance of business studies."
Apparently it was soooooo boring that heads started to nod all around the room. The "Old fart" then started firing questions at them. One such was "How much money do you think you would need to set up in business?"
One child called out "Ten Fousand pounds". Another called out "Millions" and the mildly tourettes girl in the back row shouted "Cheese sandwich" which is what she always bellows in answer to any question.
Spotting Minor quietly studying the insides of his eyelids the bloke pointed at him and asked "So what do you think it would cost?"
Minor jerked himself into full wakefulness and replied "Well it depends. If you wanted to open a shop you would have to pay rent, business rates, cost of stock and possibly staff wages for several months before you got into profit. If you were buying an existing business it would depend on the turnover in past years, how much of that was profit etc. Of course if you were starting up an internet based retail site it could be done for very much less, especially if you were trading on credit with your suppliers. One thing that many start-ups forget is that they have to live and pay their bills until they get into profit so you would need to lay some money aside for that"

The old fart turned to the teacher who was sat smirking and remarked "There's always one" and ignored Minor for the rest of the session.

Teacher came up to Minor at the lunch break and awarded him 5 housepoints!

I just knew that the home education given would prove useful ~ clearly the lad had remembered all I had told him when we discussed working for yourself and how to prepare a business plan to take to the bank. We spent several days on it last Spring when he had asked me if being self employed was better than working for someone else and how one went about it. We even drew up a business plan with the aid of a free CD from RBoS.

OK so I didn't do so well in teaching him French and Welsh but in other things I seem to have got it right.  cloud9:
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Barman

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Re: A Classic from Minor
« Reply #7 on: January 10, 2012, 10:25:22 AM »
 happ096
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: A Classic from Minor
« Reply #8 on: January 10, 2012, 10:33:09 AM »
I felt forced to be a "Dad" and said that if he could remember things like that why couldn't he remember to tidy his room.

He just looked to the heavens  ::) and replied "Cos I'm a teenager Dad!"  Banghead
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Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: A Classic from Minor
« Reply #9 on: January 10, 2012, 01:34:46 PM »
The lad will go far, you have clearly done a good job with your education plan.

My hat off to you sir.  :thumbsup:

(Slides ashtray full of bitter and half-eaten sandwich under table)

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Offline bodiam

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Re: A Classic from Minor
« Reply #10 on: January 10, 2012, 03:36:33 PM »


He just looked to the heavens  ::) and replied "Cos I'm a teenager Dad!"  Banghead
[/quote] Cos ?? Just need to teach him English then!!  noooo:
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Offline Barman

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Re: A Classic from Minor
« Reply #11 on: January 10, 2012, 03:47:38 PM »

Quote from: Snoopy
He just looked to the heavens  ::) and replied "Cos I'm a teenager Dad!"  Banghead
Cos ?? Just need to teach him English then!!  noooo:

I expect he could use the quote system tho...  ::)

There, I fixed it for you...  :thumbsup:

He could have said...

...


...



"Cos I'm a lettuce Dad!"

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Offline bodiam

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Re: A Classic from Minor
« Reply #12 on: January 10, 2012, 05:55:11 PM »


He just looked to the heavens  ::) and replied "Cos I'm a teenager Dad!"  Banghead
 Cos ?? Just need to teach him English then!!  noooo:

Memo to self:
http://youtu.be/LgZTdzoxJqo   :thumbsup:
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Offline Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)

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Re: A Classic from Minor
« Reply #13 on: January 11, 2012, 06:23:57 AM »
The lad will go far, you have clearly done a good job with your education plan.

My hat off to you sir.  :thumbsup:

(Slides ashtray full of bitter and half-eaten sandwich under table)

^^^wot he said, without the sandwich and ashtray obviously.^^^
I have always thought that the worst thing about drowning was having to call 'help!' You must look such a fool. It's put me against drowning.
J Basil Boothroyd

Offline bodiam

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Re: A Classic from Minor
« Reply #14 on: January 12, 2012, 03:44:57 PM »
Don't encourage him  Banghead
I started my life with nothing and I still have most of it left