Boo!

[Nick]

you always have tits to fall back on

That depends: speed, resilience, amplitude....that sort of stuff

[wayne Kerr]

If it isn't an obsession with playground pile ons I suppose you always have tits to fall back on.    You all really are about 12 years old at heart aren't you?





A drink Wayne precious, a drink.


  And be careful. Someone still has to get that mop out and swill down the gents!

I'll swill down the gents if I can do the ladies too cheers for the drink your hospitality knows no bounds .

[Bar Wench]

We aim to please. Within limits!

[wayne Kerr]

We aim to please. Within limits!

Pity the men dont its all over the floor in here .

[Nick]

We aim to please. Within limits!

Pity the men dont its all over the floor in here .

Well it wasn't me!!

[Bar Wench]

That is what you all say! Even Mr Wench tries it on! I know it isn't me so do I have a phantom floor pisser in my house?

[Nick]

Probably. Have you tried exorcism? Or respond to one of those penis enlargement ads. If those things work, then the distance......oh, you know where I am going with this one!

[wayne Kerr]

That is what you all say! Even Mr Wench tries it on! I know it isn't me so do I have a phantom floor pisser in my house?

No my dear you have a man . You see although we are the envy of you females in so far was we have control over the direction its getting rid of the little surprises at the end which is the bugger . Unfortunately the older we get the more surprises there are . Its the "Tell Tale" spots on the trousers that are a sure give away . So there you have it . You don't know you're born you wimmin

[Barman]

Ahh,

Do they ban people here?

Anyway, I'm back on GoM1 now, must change my GC sig in view of Steve's magnanimity 



And why don't the emotiwhatsits work here?

Welcome CJ!

You?ve turned up at a fortuitous moment as we?re having a recruitment drive ? looking for people that can contribute positively to our little pub.

Unfortunately, the emoticons only work after you have made ten posts ? it?s to do with some anti-spam dowhatsit.

Do hope you will stay and join in.

[grumpyoldsoldier]

Ah, a barman. .  at last. .  I have been waiting to be served for so long that the bloody prices have gone up twice! And that mens bog!!! Do you have a full time cleaner?
I think I will go over and standby the piano then

[Snoopy]

Ah, a barman. .  at last. .  I have been waiting to be served for so long that the bloody prices have gone up twice! And that mens bog!!! Do you have a full time cleaner?
I think I will go over and standby the piano then

Do you tinkle the old ivories then?  .... you will have noticed NO Juke Box. Praise be for that.
But a bit of a knees up and a singsong on a Saturday Night would be nice.
By the way ... what are you drinking? This one's on me .... a sort of welcome.

[grumpyoldsoldier]

I will have a Drambuie Shandy please, no umbrella ta. . . . .

[Barman]

Ah, a barman. .  at last. .  I have been waiting to be served for so long that the bloody prices have gone up twice! And that mens bog!!! Do you have a full time cleaner?
I think I will go over and standby the piano then

Welcome! 

We do have a full-time cleaner but The Wench hasn?t read the small print in her contract yet. 

Please don?t relieve yourself by the piano ? we haven?t quite paid for it?