Author Topic: Wayne Rooney  (Read 2709 times)

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Offline Miss Demeanour

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Wayne Rooney
« on: October 22, 2010, 07:28:10 AM »
In one of the biggest about-turns in recent footballing memory, Manchester United and England striker Wayne Rooney has today signed a new three-year contract agreement.

Rooney, 24, went with his wife Coleen to his local branch of Currys and purchased a Hotpoint washing machine, and, after receiving advice from the sales assistant, signed the three-year warranty agreement for a specially-discounted £54.45 per year (inc VAT).

 lol: lol: lol:
Skubber

Offline Miss Demeanour

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Re: Wayne Rooney
« Reply #1 on: October 22, 2010, 07:35:38 AM »
Odds on Wayne Rooney's next club have been shortened. It's now 8/11 Stringfellows, 3/1 Spearmint Rhino.

Skubber

Offline Uncle Mort

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Re: Wayne Rooney
« Reply #2 on: October 22, 2010, 09:55:24 AM »
Odds on Wayne Rooney's next club have been shortened. It's now 8/11 Stringfellows, 3/1 Spearmint Rhino.



Do those two clubs have "Grab a Granny Night" then  rubschin:

Offline Snoopy

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Re: Wayne Rooney
« Reply #3 on: October 22, 2010, 11:33:22 AM »
Have you seen Peter Stringfellow lately?
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Uncle Mort

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Re: Wayne Rooney
« Reply #4 on: October 22, 2010, 11:57:15 AM »
He's actually gone and signed a new 5 year contract with Man U.  eeek:

Offline Snoopy

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Re: Wayne Rooney
« Reply #5 on: October 22, 2010, 12:01:56 PM »
Negotiating Ploy then ~ trust the media to fall for it!  ::)



Well done Alex Ferguson ..... now you'll be able to flog him off at a super inflated price the very next time he plays you up.
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: Wayne Rooney
« Reply #6 on: October 22, 2010, 12:04:17 PM »
Have you seen Peter Stringfellow lately?
He's actually gone and signed a new 5 year contract with Man U.  eeek:

What position does Mr Stringfellow play?
I mostly despair

Offline Snoopy

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Re: Wayne Rooney
« Reply #7 on: October 22, 2010, 12:04:51 PM »
Well off side.
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline apc2010

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Re: Wayne Rooney
« Reply #8 on: October 23, 2010, 10:57:22 PM »
offered him a few extra grans a week , i heard ,,or was it grand ....???

Offline Miss Demeanour

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Re: Wayne Rooney
« Reply #9 on: October 25, 2010, 07:11:14 AM »
I'm confusimplicated  confused2:

How can he be jetting off to Dubai for a bit of a break after a 'torrid week' .?

FFS he is not injured. It is still the football season. It may be his berfday but that doesn't mean he is entitled to holiday. Hasn't he got training and the such like he should be attending ?
« Last Edit: October 25, 2010, 07:48:56 AM by Miss Demeanor »
Skubber

Offline Snoopy

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Re: Wayne Rooney
« Reply #10 on: October 25, 2010, 07:43:54 AM »
 Wankah:
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Uncle Mort

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Re: Wayne Rooney
« Reply #11 on: October 25, 2010, 08:13:59 AM »
Wankah:

Indeed he is (unless you were referring to Miss D?)


Offline Snoopy

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Re: Wayne Rooney
« Reply #12 on: October 25, 2010, 08:25:29 AM »
No ~ deffo W@n@Rooney
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Just One More

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Re: Wayne Rooney
« Reply #13 on: October 27, 2010, 10:06:56 PM »
The Fergie empires crumbling, and Rooney wants to go,
He said he wants Man city, but Alex told him no,
Fuck off back to Everton, or film another Shrek,
If II see you in a City shirt, I'll break your fucking neck.
So go out banging prostitutes, or back to robbing cars, ...
But if you think your going to Eastlands, you can kiss my fucking arse!!
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline GROWLER

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Re: Wayne Rooney
« Reply #14 on: November 03, 2010, 07:04:26 PM »



A bonfire society has unveiled its annual guy in the form of scandal-hit striker Wayne Rooney.

The 49ft creation, complete with green Shrek-style ears to mock the Manchester United ace's likeness to the animated ogre, will go up in flames at Edenbridge Bonfire Society's annual parade and display on Saturday.

With crowds of up to 15,000 spectators expected, the steel-framed structure is packed full of fireworks to ensure the footballer goes up with a bang.

Dressed in full kit, including the club's famous red shirt, the effigy depicts Rooney clutching a copy of his lucrative new five-year contract under one arm, while in his other hand is a holdall full of cash.

Charles Laver, of the Kent-based society, said Rooney was chosen as this year's guy after being plastered all over the tabloids in recent months.

In September he hit the headlines over allegations he slept with two prostitutes while wife Coleen was pregnant with their son Kai.

Then his loyalty to Manchester United was thrown into doubt when he suggested he would leave, before going on to sign the new contract with the club.

Mr Laver said: "I hate football myself so I'm quite happy to burn a footballer.



Sweet, as a nut. cloud9:
« Last Edit: November 03, 2010, 07:09:10 PM by GROWLER »