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Author Topic: In Danger  (Read 1375 times)

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Offline Snoopy

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In Danger
« on: November 05, 2010, 01:32:45 PM »

In the dead of summer a fly was resting on a leaf beside a lake. A hot, dry fly who said to no one in particular, "Gosh, if I go down three inches, I will feel the mist from the water and I will be refreshed."
There was a fish in the water thinking, "Gosh, if that fly goes down three inches I can eat him."

There was a bear on the shore thinking, "Gosh, if that fly goes down three inches, that fish will jump for the fly, and I will eat him."

It also happened that a hunter was further up the bank of the lake preparing to eat a cheese sandwich. "Gosh," he thought, "if that fly goes down three inches, and that fish leaps for it, that bear will expose himself and grab for the fish. I'll shoot the bear and then have a proper trophy."

A wee mouse by the hunter's foot was thinking, "Gosh, if that fly goes down three inches, and that fish jumps for that fly, and that bear grabs for that fish, the dumb hunter will shoot the bear and drop his cheese sandwich."

A cat lurking in the bushes took in this scene and thought, as was fashionable to do on the banks of this particular lake around lunch time, "Gosh, if that fly goes down three inches, and that fish jumps for that fly, and that bear grabs for that fish, and that hunter shoots that bear, and that mouse makes off with the cheese sandwich, then I can have mouse for lunch."

The poor fly is finally so hot and so dry that he heads down for the cooling mist of the water, the fish swallows the fly, the bear grabs the fish, the hunter shoots the bear, the mouse grabs the cheese sandwich, the cat jumps for the mouse, the mouse ducks, and the cat falls into the water and drowns.

And the moral of the story is:... Whenever a fly goes down three inches, some pussy is probably in danger!


   
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Nick

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Re: In Danger
« Reply #1 on: November 05, 2010, 01:56:39 PM »
 tunble:
Warning: May contain Skub
Cat sitter extraordinaire
Semi-professional crocodile

Offline Barman

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Re: In Danger
« Reply #2 on: November 05, 2010, 01:58:47 PM »
AFFS!
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: In Danger
« Reply #3 on: November 05, 2010, 02:51:31 PM »
 razz:


There aren't any new jokes ~ just variations on old ones.
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Barman

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Re: In Danger
« Reply #4 on: November 05, 2010, 06:06:13 PM »
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: In Danger
« Reply #5 on: November 05, 2010, 06:08:20 PM »
You searched back 3 fecking years to find that?
No wonder it took all afternoon.







Some people need to get a life  noooo:
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Barman

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Re: In Danger
« Reply #6 on: November 05, 2010, 06:10:03 PM »
You searched back 3 fecking years to find that?
No wonder it took all afternoon.







Some people need to get a life  noooo:

 lol: lol: lol:

That was funnier than the joke...  ;)
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: In Danger
« Reply #7 on: November 05, 2010, 06:12:59 PM »
I cannot deny that  surrender:
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Barman

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Re: In Danger
« Reply #8 on: November 05, 2010, 06:20:40 PM »
 ;D
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: In Danger
« Reply #9 on: November 05, 2010, 06:26:47 PM »


I fart in your direction!
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Barman

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Re: In Danger
« Reply #10 on: November 05, 2010, 06:40:36 PM »
May the flies of a thousand camels infect your arsehole!
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Offline Pirate

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Re: In Danger
« Reply #11 on: November 05, 2010, 06:42:00 PM »
now now girls...

Offline Barman

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Re: In Danger
« Reply #12 on: November 05, 2010, 07:37:27 PM »
now now girls...

May your eyes turn to arseholes and shit all down your face!  lol:
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Offline Snoopy

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Re: In Danger
« Reply #13 on: November 05, 2010, 08:13:38 PM »
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.