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Author Topic: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank  (Read 18161 times)

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Offline Nick

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #15 on: January 09, 2012, 03:40:10 PM »
Is it time for my twig joke?
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #16 on: January 09, 2012, 03:40:39 PM »
I left HSBC after a telephone conversation that went:
Phone rings and I answer it by giving my name (as I always do)
Bank: "Hello is that Mr Snoopy?"
Me: "Yes"
Bank: "For security purposes can you confirm your telephone number"
Me: "Yes"
Bank: "Well what is it?"
Me: "If you want me to tell you my telephone number then say so ~ if you want me to confirm it then you must tell me what you think it is and I'll confirm whether you have it right"
Bank: "That's not how it works"
Me: "It does if you speak English .... Anyway you must have the right number as you called me and I have answered"
Bank: "It's a security matter"
Me: "Then call MI5"
Bank: "It is for your protection"
Me: "So how do I know that you are indeed the HSBC?"
Bank: "Because I told you when I called and you answered"
Me: "And I told you who I was when I answered .... anyway I do not discuss my financial affairs over the telephone, I suggest you write to me"
Bank: "But your account is set up for telephone banking"
Me: "Not any more it isn't ~ You will be receiving a letter from me ~ Goodbye"


I have had similar conversations with Electricity Companies, Insurance Sales Staff, The Post Office and sundry others and have probably mentioned it before but why oh why do they let these muppets loose on the public?

Just tell them they have to come into your branch to sort it out.

That's going out on a limb..........

Offline Nick

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #17 on: January 09, 2012, 03:43:28 PM »
Barking mad  noooo:
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Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #18 on: January 09, 2012, 06:25:44 PM »
Quote from: Nick (GC First Class) link=topic=10430.msg333078#msg333078
AND gave me an electronic random number generator  cloud9:
[/quote

Has anyone started the sweepstake about how long before it's gubbed?  whistle:
The universe is run by the complex interweaving of three elements. Energy, matter, and enlightened self-interest.

Offline Barman

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #19 on: January 09, 2012, 06:45:39 PM »
Quote from: Nick (GC First Class) link=topic=10430.msg333078#msg333078
AND gave me an electronic random number generator  cloud9:
[/quote

Has anyone started the sweepstake about how long before it's gubbed?  whistle:

Like your quote?  point:
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Offline Nick

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #20 on: January 09, 2012, 06:55:14 PM »
Child  noooo:
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Offline Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #21 on: January 09, 2012, 08:14:58 PM »
Child  noooo:

Grumpmeister?  Not for much longer it's his birthday this week.

I have always thought that the worst thing about drowning was having to call 'help!' You must look such a fool. It's put me against drowning.
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Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #22 on: January 09, 2012, 08:16:20 PM »
Miss C remembers  cloud9:

The universe is run by the complex interweaving of three elements. Energy, matter, and enlightened self-interest.

Offline Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #23 on: January 09, 2012, 08:49:45 PM »
Miss C remembers  cloud9:

Not much admittedly. sad24:  Still it's prolly for the best.
I have always thought that the worst thing about drowning was having to call 'help!' You must look such a fool. It's put me against drowning.
J Basil Boothroyd

Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #24 on: January 09, 2012, 09:06:37 PM »
 happy100


Hang on, I didn't get up to THAT much on my last one did I?  eeek: It got a bit hazy after the jagerbombs   scared2:
The universe is run by the complex interweaving of three elements. Energy, matter, and enlightened self-interest.

Offline Miss Creant Commander of the picklement and baking BAb(Hons)

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #25 on: January 09, 2012, 09:32:12 PM »
happy100


Hang on, I didn't get up to THAT much on my last one did I?  eeek: It got a bit hazy after the jagerbombs   scared2:

It got a bit messy after the jagerbombs. noooo:

























Pssst youngsters out there what's a jagerbomb?
I have always thought that the worst thing about drowning was having to call 'help!' You must look such a fool. It's put me against drowning.
J Basil Boothroyd

Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #26 on: January 09, 2012, 09:39:03 PM »
happy100


Hang on, I didn't get up to THAT much on my last one did I?  eeek: It got a bit hazy after the jagerbombs   scared2:

It got a bit messy after the jagerbombs. noooo:

























Pssst youngsters out there what's a jagerbomb?

An Islamic wooly jumper?
I mostly despair

Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #27 on: January 09, 2012, 10:07:56 PM »
1/2 can Red Bull energy drink
1 - 2 oz Jagermeister herbal liqueur

Pour red bull into a medium sized glass. Add a shot glass of jagermeister, and chug.

Apparently they are a birthday tradition with the guys I was out with so they kept being bought for me even though I was perfectly happy with the cervezas with the shot of tequila mixed in that I was already drinking.  redface:
The universe is run by the complex interweaving of three elements. Energy, matter, and enlightened self-interest.

Offline beerhead

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #28 on: January 09, 2012, 10:47:51 PM »



Grumpmeister's perfect night out !
Not quite a regular ! Regular as clockwork me !

Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: Mr Nick gets awkward at the bank
« Reply #29 on: January 09, 2012, 11:47:35 PM »
Piss orf you cheeky bugger,  lol: I actually made it home. May not always be mine but I do make it.  angel1
The universe is run by the complex interweaving of three elements. Energy, matter, and enlightened self-interest.