As I was going out one day
My head fell off and rolled away,
But when I saw that it was gone,
I picked it up and put it on.
And when I got into the street
A fellow cried 'Look at your feet!'
I looked at them and sadly said
'I've left them both asleep in bed!'
One bright morning in the middle of the night,
Two dead boys got up to fight.
Back-to-back they faced one another,
Drew their swords and shot each other.
One was blind and the other couldn't see,
So they chose a dummy for a referee.
A blind man went to see fair play,
A dumb man went to shout "hooray!"
A deaf policeman heard the noise,
And came and killed those two dead boys.
A paralyzed donkey walking by,
Kicked the copper in the eye,
Sent him through a nine inch wall,
Into a dry ditch and drowned them all.
(If you don't believe this lie is true,
Ask the blind man -- he saw it too!)
