Anyways we managed to get on a train along with 3 million other people. You can imagine how packed to the rafters it was .
Some kindly gents gave up their seats for the ladies
We couldn't even squeeze into a carriage so our seats were the fold down type outside the disabled toilet. You know the one that takes a lifetime for the slidey door to open and then you stand then not doing anything ( again for a lifetime) before you are satisfied the door is closed and locked.
After a day on the lash you can imagine how busy this potentially could have been...however due to the crush most people weren't even attempting it. Those that did however had left it far too long to wait.
Then these completely wankered idiots were just looking at it trying to work out how to use it....we got tired of saying " just push the button with the light on"..
We had some blokes standing next to us who were really quite funny and by about half way through the journey they intercepted anybody going into the bog saying that the ladies were actually a judging panel and wanted to see style, lack of fragrance and panache when using the facilities and we would score them as soon as the doors opened
We also got anyone going into them to do a Star in their Eyes thing ....as soon as they had finished and the doors opened we had " and tonight Matthew I'm gonna be "
