Among annoying radio ads is the one for "Fissure Fixings". Irritating in the extreme.
"...if it's good enough for the Channel Tunnel, it's good enough for your job..."
No, it's not. My only use for one would be to stuff in the gob of a raddled foot + mouth infected heifer on the 4th floor of the office, who is whingeing that her computer is making "funny whirry noises" and her mouse feels "scratchy". Well stop eating bag after bag of crisps over it every day, dear and perhaps keep your trap shut while ruminating.
Oh, and the whirry noises are probably because your PC is bedecked with stupid furry toys and pictures of your tattoed neanderthal boyfriend (who, by the way is shagging Donna in Accounts on the sly) and these, combined with the bits of sandwich and layers of dust probably point to a bit of overheating.
PICNIC!
