How can I get my daughter to take my suggestion about her bridesmaids?
Everyone knows that it's traditional for the bride to include her fattest friend in her bridal party and have her fat friend stand close to her during the formal picture taking so the bride looks thinner and more beautiful. But she says she is only having three bridesmaids including her maid of honor, and none of them are fat. But I want her to look her best during her photos, and considering her father and I are the ones paying for the wedding, I should get my way on this. What do you think?
Linky please I feel some mind messing coming on.
Dear Mother of the Bride (MotB)
Please take no notice of what other people had said in answer to your question. Times have changed as has wedding etiquette. Many people now opt for a 'modern wedding' and payment for the wedding may be spread across the parents. This is not the case for you, your daughter and future son-in-law.
Traditionally this is supposed to be the happiest day of your daughters life and as you are choosing a traditional wedding you have every right to have your own way. It is time to put your foot down on this matter.
From what you say in your question I have to assume that your daughter is both un-attractive and somewhat overweight and of course will not 'look good' in the formal photography session. It is hardly surprising therefore that as the MotB you want to disguise these facts.
There are several courses of action that you and your husband can take and I list them below.
1. Ensure that you employ a really good make-up artist.
2.. Refuse to pay for the wedding unless your daughter finds a fatter friend to be a bridesmaid. If your daughter has no friends that are more overweight than she is then here in the UK we have companies from who you can rent for the day or hour or part thereof a fat girl.
3. The third and less preferable option as it is dreadfully expensive is to ensure that the photographer that you employ has a current version of 'Portrait Professional' loaded on his PC. This will allow him to eradicate blemishes, move your daughters eyes closer together so that the perfect ratio is obtained. Airbrush pounds if not stones off of your daughters body thereby making her look both at the very least acceptable and possibly even beautiful.
I wish you and your lovely family all the very best for this wonderful family occasion.
Should you have any further questions regarding wedding etiquette please do not hesitate to contact me as I am a professional and well known wedding planner.