Mrs G gubbs this thing

[GROWLER]

Tis battery as BM said. Supplies power so that unit remembers its setiings, date/time, etc. These days they normally outlast the use of the PC. Usually a round device like an over-size watch battery but can vary.

In the early days they were soldered in! Try changing one of those without frying things. 

I Thank You!
I accept your apology growler - you clueless furry oaf! 

Yes yes yes yes, I know, but you must agree, you have been known to rip the piss out of me on these matters over the past few years like.
Hence my somewhat cynical attitude, and I'M NOT a furry oaf either, chav lad.

[GROWLER]

Tell me Tel. (the voice of reason  )  Is this really a job I can tackle, or should I ger'a man in?

[Barman]

Tell me Tel. (the voice of reason  )  Is this really a job I can tackle, or should I ger'a man in?

Look at the bleddy video I posted! 

[GROWLER]

Tell me Tel. (the voice of reason  )  Is this really a job I can tackle, or should I ger'a man in?

Look at the bleddy video I posted! 

OK OK O BLOODY K!
I have, but still worry that I'm messin' about in the back of summat that I hate and have no knowledge of.

I''ll take the back of this thing tonight and survey the internal electricity giblets.

[Nick]

What can possibly go wrong?

[GROWLER]

What can possibly go wrong?

Plenty, that's why I'm a bit on edge about diy'ing anything digi.

At least it proves I'm not a alien ey?

[Barman]

Tell me Tel. (the voice of reason  )  Is this really a job I can tackle, or should I ger'a man in?

Look at the bleddy video I posted! 

OK OK O BLOODY K!
I have, but still worry that I'm messin' about in the back of summat that I hate and have no knowledge of.

I''ll take the back of this thing tonight and survey the internal electricity giblets.

1) Unplug it first
2) Have the vacuum cleaner ready - it will be full of dust and shite. Suck it all out and pay particular attention to the fans.
3) Ideally have it on a tiled floor - not a carpet.
4) When you remove the battery, 'earth' yourself by touching the metal case of the 'puter... Avoids static lecky damaging the parts
5) Try not to get your greasy paws all over the new battery when you put it back
6) While you are there, you may as well give the video spring a wind - it will prolly need it after ten years
7) Lastly, as tel says - if the owld battery is soldered-in you are fecked. Fingers crossed.

Simples. 

[GROWLER]

Tell me Tel. (the voice of reason  )  Is this really a job I can tackle, or should I ger'a man in?

Look at the bleddy video I posted! 

OK OK O BLOODY K!
I have, but still worry that I'm messin' about in the back of summat that I hate and have no knowledge of.

I''ll take the back of this thing tonight and survey the internal electricity giblets.

1) Unplug it first
2) Have the vacuum cleaner ready - it will be full of dust and shite. Suck it all out and pay particular attention to the fans.
3) Ideally have it on a tiled floor - not a carpet.
4) When you remove the battery, 'earth' yourself by touching the metal case of the 'puter... Avoids static lecky damaging the parts
5) Try not to get your greasy paws all over the new battery when you put it back
6) While you are there, you may as well give the video spring a wind - it will prolly need it after ten years
7) Lastly, as tel says - if the owld battery is soldered-in you are fecked. Fingers crossed.

Simples. 

EY?

Can't fit videos into the cd slot thing on the front of the box.

Is there some sort of VCR slot in it that I didn't know about?

[Barman]

Tell me Tel. (the voice of reason  )  Is this really a job I can tackle, or should I ger'a man in?

Look at the bleddy video I posted! 

OK OK O BLOODY K!
I have, but still worry that I'm messin' about in the back of summat that I hate and have no knowledge of.

I''ll take the back of this thing tonight and survey the internal electricity giblets.

1) Unplug it first
2) Have the vacuum cleaner ready - it will be full of dust and shite. Suck it all out and pay particular attention to the fans.
3) Ideally have it on a tiled floor - not a carpet.
4) When you remove the battery, 'earth' yourself by touching the metal case of the 'puter... Avoids static lecky damaging the parts
5) Try not to get your greasy paws all over the new battery when you put it back
6) While you are there, you may as well give the video spring a wind - it will prolly need it after ten years
7) Lastly, as tel says - if the owld battery is soldered-in you are fecked. Fingers crossed.

Simples. 

EY?

The video spring...

It will be well worn down after ten years - specially if the battery has died like.... 

[GROWLER]

Tell me Tel. (the voice of reason  )  Is this really a job I can tackle, or should I ger'a man in?

Look at the bleddy video I posted! 

OK OK O BLOODY K!
I have, but still worry that I'm messin' about in the back of summat that I hate and have no knowledge of.

I''ll take the back of this thing tonight and survey the internal electricity giblets.

1) Unplug it first
2) Have the vacuum cleaner ready - it will be full of dust and shite. Suck it all out and pay particular attention to the fans.
3) Ideally have it on a tiled floor - not a carpet.
4) When you remove the battery, 'earth' yourself by touching the metal case of the 'puter... Avoids static lecky damaging the parts
5) Try not to get your greasy paws all over the new battery when you put it back
6) While you are there, you may as well give the video spring a wind - it will prolly need it after ten years
7) Lastly, as tel says - if the owld battery is soldered-in you are fecked. Fingers crossed.

Simples. 

EY?

The video spring...

It will be well worn down after ten years - specially if the battery has died like.... 

But where's the video tape go?

Only takes dvd's and cd's.

[GROWLER]

Video spring?

Is that technical digi    i.t. jargon for some sort of cooling device?

[Steve]

If you know your model number then you can usually get dismantling instructions via Google

But

I gave up at 1.30 am last night on my laptop. All it needs is a knackered fan replacing bt feck moi every step takes bleeding ages and now I have to get the motherboard out and there's got to be one more hidden scrw


More practically for Growler

Windows XP will live on long after 2014 and don't touch Windows 8 until they sort out how they want it to look.  Windows 7 is fine, almost good in fact and you can get PCs really cheap these days.

[Barman]

Video spring?

Is that technical digi    i.t. jargon for some sort of cooling device?

When you open her up, suck all the shite out and find the video card - the one your monitor plugs into.

On the side you'll see a big key - give it a few turns clockwise to keep it going.... Don't over-tighten it tho or it could get 'over-clocked' and too fast for your monitor.

[GROWLER]

If you know your model number then you can usually get dismantling instructions via Google

But

I gave up at 1.30 am last night on my laptop. All it needs is a knackered fan replacing bt feck moi every step takes bleeding ages and now I have to get the motherboard out and there's got to be one more hidden scrw


More practically for Growler

Windows XP will live on long after 2014 and don't touch Windows 8 until they sort out how they want it to look.  Windows 7 is fine, almost good in fact and you can get PCs really cheap these days.

7 was the one before XP wasn't it?

I like XP. It's relatively simple and trouble free., which is more than can be said about the latest version whatever it's called.

My i.t. 'man' was putting the willies up me (not literally) regarding 8, saying that after April of next year Windows Xp won't be updated anymore, meaning bugs will be able to get in to gubberise things possibly.

I dunno, all alien to me.

Whatever happened to ...."if it's not broke, DON'T fix it" ey?

[Steve]

7 came after Fista which came after XP

7 is OK