The all new Criminal Mongstermind thread

[Steve]

Decide to nick a van - check
Take photo of driving licence and add it to phone - check
Leave phone at scene of crime - check
Forget to have a lock set up on the phone allowing full access to everything contained within including Facebook page - check



I think it's safe to say you are a criminal monstermind

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-8343967/Man-gets-revenge-thief-tried-steal-van-hacking-Facebook-left-phone.html

[Barman]

Decide to nick a van - check
Take photo of driving licence and add it to phone - check
Leave phone at scene of crime - check
Forget to have a lock set up on the phone allowing full access to everything contained within including Facebook page - check



I think it's safe to say you are a criminal monstermind

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-8343967/Man-gets-revenge-thief-tried-steal-van-hacking-Facebook-left-phone.html

[Grumpmeister]

It's good to see Mr Darwin sir taking a hand in dealing with some of the rioters over the pond

https://districtherald.com/idiot-north-carolina-rioter-lights-himself-on-fire-while-attempting-to-burn-down-historic-building/

https://districtherald.com/watch-los-angeles-rioters-hilariously-roll-a-dumpster-over-one-of-their-own/

[apc2010]

It's good to see Mr Darwin sir taking a hand in dealing with some of the rioters over the pond

https://districtherald.com/idiot-north-carolina-rioter-lights-himself-on-fire-while-attempting-to-burn-down-historic-building/

https://districtherald.com/watch-los-angeles-rioters-hilariously-roll-a-dumpster-over-one-of-their-own/

 

[Steve]

It's good to see Mr Darwin sir taking a hand in dealing with some of the rioters over the pond

https://districtherald.com/idiot-north-carolina-rioter-lights-himself-on-fire-while-attempting-to-burn-down-historic-building/

https://districtherald.com/watch-los-angeles-rioters-hilariously-roll-a-dumpster-over-one-of-their-own/

 

(why does the first link not work unless you copy it into a new tab?)

[Barman]

It's good to see Mr Darwin sir taking a hand in dealing with some of the rioters over the pond

https://districtherald.com/idiot-north-carolina-rioter-lights-himself-on-fire-while-attempting-to-burn-down-historic-building/

https://districtherald.com/watch-los-angeles-rioters-hilariously-roll-a-dumpster-over-one-of-their-own/

[Grumpmeister]

Unfortunately Apey has already been beaten to the obvious pun.. 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8384233/Bungling-crooks-blast-security-van-pieces-sending-money-flying-everywhere.html

[Barman]

Unfortunately Apey has already been beaten to the obvious pun.. 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8384233/Bungling-crooks-blast-security-van-pieces-sending-money-flying-everywhere.html

 

[Grumpmeister]

Here's more joke fodder for Apey but if anyone else fancies a go by all means give him a helping hand... 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8393947/Man-amputates-hand-making-bomb-designed-blow-hot-cheerleaders.html

[Steve]

Here's more joke fodder for Apey but if anyone else fancies a go by all means give him a helping hand... 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8393947/Man-amputates-hand-making-bomb-designed-blow-hot-cheerleaders.html

   and 'helping hand' 
 
What a complete loser, on the bright side for him he'll still be able to count up the number of hopes he has on his remaining fingers

[Grumpmeister]

I suppose you can say he was caught red handed... 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8413711/Fraudster-sliced-HAND-6million-insurance-scam-jailed-two-years.html

[Steve]

I suppose you can say he was caught red handed... 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8413711/Fraudster-sliced-HAND-6million-insurance-scam-jailed-two-years.html

what a complete loser

[Grumpmeister]

Apey, as you are handy with puns this one is all yours 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8724487/Woman-SAWED-hand-claim-700-000-insurance-fraud-jailed.html

[Grumpmeister]

I would make a comment but it's too easy a target... Apey, you're up 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8834557/Knick-Shoplifter-caught-supermarket-CCTV-stashing-groceries-underpants.html?ito=chromelessDM_0

[Barman]

I would make a comment but it's too easy a target... Apey, you're up 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8834557/Knick-Shoplifter-caught-supermarket-CCTV-stashing-groceries-underpants.html?ito=chromelessDM_0