Many years ago I went to work in Mexico and applied here for the necessary visa. The document I was given required further processing on arrival so I went to the correct office in Mexico City. I was told I needed a photograph of myself. I was not told that it had to conform to very specific guidelines and be accompanied by a description of myself in SPanish. To cut a very long story short, I ended up with 54 photos of me of which only one was deemed to be correct and I also had to rewrite my self description 8 times until I was correctly using Spanish words for stuff like tall, wide, deep and so on. (Don't ask)
My visa form had a reference number but the actual visa had a different reference number so when the day came to collect my residence visa I had to search through over 4000 other entries before I found mine
At some point I went over to Guatamala (a mistake as I didn't realised they were having a civil war. I thought all the shooting was evidence of hunting and spent three weeks there blithely unaware of what was going on
)
WHen the time came to re enter Mexico I was denied entry and told I had to get a new visa form from the British Consul in Huehuetenango ( a dead and alive border town where I terrified the natives (they were all tiny Mayan Indians and I was knocking around with a Texan bodybuilder), had my fortune told by a chaffinch and got locked in a bath of volcanic mud).
The document was free but the COnsul's PA told me that it would cost me a dollar. Being English I refused to pay this on principle and demanded to see the consul (who seemed to have some links with the local drugs business).
After a long wait and a long protest from me he said, "Will you pay the dollar or not?" I declined. He opened a desk drawer and produced a revolver
"Are you sure?" he asked.
I paid
