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Author Topic: Door Knockers  (Read 2245 times)

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Offline Miss Demeanour

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Door Knockers
« on: February 29, 2020, 12:08:33 PM »
So rap a tap tap a minute ago and I go to open the front door.

"hello" offers this little woman

"my name is June and this is my husband Richard"

Check - no leaflets in hand , or clip board etc

But still don't say anything.

" Do you think there will be world peace " she says


Door shuts quicker than a quick thing  noooo:
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Offline Uncle Mort

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Re: Door Knockers
« Reply #1 on: February 29, 2020, 01:39:17 PM »
God bothers    noooo:
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Offline Barman

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Re: Door Knockers
« Reply #2 on: February 29, 2020, 01:53:15 PM »
Quote from: Uncle Mort on February 29, 2020, 01:39:17 PM
God bothers    noooo:

^^^ wot Uncle said ^^^  noooo:

"Peace off" being an appropriate reply...  whistle:
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Offline Darwins Selection

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Re: Door Knockers
« Reply #3 on: February 29, 2020, 02:29:25 PM »
I  find a simple Salaam Alaikum usually moves them on quite swiftly.
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Offline Barman

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Re: Door Knockers
« Reply #4 on: February 29, 2020, 02:31:16 PM »
Quote from: Darwins Selection on February 29, 2020, 02:29:25 PM
I  find a simple Salaam Alaikum usually moves them on quite swiftly.

 lol: lol: lol:
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Offline Miss Demeanour

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Re: Door Knockers
« Reply #5 on: February 29, 2020, 03:03:58 PM »
I would love to know what the success rates are for this form of harassment.

Or maybe they are just lonely people looking for a chat and I am soon to be prosecuted because I have not been 'kind'  ::)
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Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: Door Knockers
« Reply #6 on: February 29, 2020, 03:25:04 PM »
Quote from: Barman on February 29, 2020, 01:53:15 PM
Quote from: Uncle Mort on February 29, 2020, 01:39:17 PM
God bothers    noooo:

^^^ wot Uncle said ^^^  noooo:

"Peace off" being an appropriate reply...  whistle:

When I was younger one of my brothers had a heavy metal album with the song 'Welcome to the Church of the Apocalyptic Lawnmower'......



it..............may have inspired us to create a religion of our own to scare and confuse the 'missionaries' that would invade Falmouth en mass and knock on doors at the end of summer  eveilgrin:
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Offline Barman

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Re: Door Knockers
« Reply #7 on: February 29, 2020, 03:28:50 PM »
Quote from: Miss Demeanour on February 29, 2020, 03:03:58 PM
I would love to know what the success rates are for this form of harassment.

Or maybe they are just lonely people looking for a chat and I am soon to be prosecuted because I have not been 'kind'  ::)

I have some good Mormon friends and they get sent all over the world on their' Mission' when they are 18 or whatever...

I assume they must actually convert some people to make the whole thing worthwhile...? Shrugs:
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Offline Nick

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Re: Door Knockers
« Reply #8 on: February 29, 2020, 03:49:07 PM »
Years ago, in London, the late Mrs Nick and I acquired some new neighbours. We went round to say hello.

It was a very hot summer and, as they were "going away" the following week, they asked if we would mind watering their garden.  This we did, and on their return they invited us round for a glass of wine.

I enquired after their holiday and they revealed that they had been on a missionary training course and (he laid his hand on my arm  eeek: ) they "wanted to talk to us about Jesus". I nearly choked on my wine  eeek:

Tricky situation
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Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: Door Knockers
« Reply #9 on: February 29, 2020, 03:56:27 PM »
Quote from: Barman on February 29, 2020, 03:28:50 PM
Quote from: Miss Demeanour on February 29, 2020, 03:03:58 PM
I would love to know what the success rates are for this form of harassment.

Or maybe they are just lonely people looking for a chat and I am soon to be prosecuted because I have not been 'kind'  ::)

I have some good Mormon friends and they get sent all over the world on their' Mission' when they are 18 or whatever...

I assume they must actually convert some people to make the whole thing worthwhile...? Shrugs:

The Mormons aren't that bad in the scheme of things. Scientologists however....  noooo:

Those buggers have been coming to Cornwall ever since they opened a church in Plymouth they seem hell bent on spreading down here as well. My responses range from nice and polite to 'I have no intention of giving your cult all my money just to hear that humanity evolved from aliens sacrificed in a volcano with a nuclear weapon by some intergalactic warlord'. They don't seem to like that for some reason...  rubschin:
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Offline Barman

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Re: Door Knockers
« Reply #10 on: February 29, 2020, 03:57:02 PM »
Quote from: Nick on February 29, 2020, 03:49:07 PM
Years ago, in London, the late Mrs Nick and I acquired some new neighbours. We went round to say hello.

It was a very hot summer and, as they were "going away" the following week, they asked if we would mind watering their garden.  This we did, and on their return they invited us round for a glass of wine.

I enquired after their holiday and they revealed that they had been on a missionary training course and (he laid his hand on my arm  eeek: ) they "wanted to talk to us about Jesus". I nearly choked on my wine  eeek:

Tricky situation

The bizarre thing is that they get sent off to a random country... They have to turn up there (limited belongings I believe), learn the lingo and then head off knocking on doors...

Lovely people tho... Strange underwear...  scared2:
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Offline Nick

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Re: Door Knockers
« Reply #11 on: February 29, 2020, 03:58:40 PM »
Remind me to tell you all about Francis Newman one day.

Tried to convert Muslim Persians to Plymouth Brethrenism  noooo:
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Offline apc2010

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Re: Door Knockers
« Reply #12 on: February 29, 2020, 04:52:52 PM »
Quote from: Barman on February 29, 2020, 03:57:02 PM
Quote from: Nick on February 29, 2020, 03:49:07 PM
Years ago, in London, the late Mrs Nick and I acquired some new neighbours. We went round to say hello.

It was a very hot summer and, as they were "going away" the following week, they asked if we would mind watering their garden.  This we did, and on their return they invited us round for a glass of wine.

I enquired after their holiday and they revealed that they had been on a missionary training course and (he laid his hand on my arm  eeek: ) they "wanted to talk to us about Jesus". I nearly choked on my wine  eeek:

Tricky situation

The bizarre thing is that they get sent off to a random country... They have to turn up there (limited belongings I believe), learn the lingo and then head off knocking on doors...

Lovely people tho... Strange underwear...  scared2:

Underwear ....... eeek:     rubschin:     eyes:
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Offline Nick

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Re: Door Knockers
« Reply #13 on: February 29, 2020, 04:53:37 PM »
How does he know?  eeek:
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Offline Barman

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Re: Door Knockers
« Reply #14 on: February 29, 2020, 04:55:18 PM »
Quote from: Nick on February 29, 2020, 04:53:37 PM
How does he know?  eeek:

Cos they stayed at our house in Maidenhead, washed them and put them on the line...  eeek:
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