On being obliging

[Pastis]

Being obliging is now under review, and that's against my nature. I gave my mobile number to a man who rents the local hall like I do in case he got into difficulties setting the alarm. Last night took the biscuit when he called on the landline since I'd turned the mobile off.

"Hi, can you come round... the alarm's going off .. !!"
"No. Out of the question. I'm eating dinner."
"Please... can't you put it back in the oven?" ( )
"No. I'm eating. What's the problem?"
"The alarm's going and I can't remember the numbers, and.. oh shit..."
"Well, phone the admin chap. He's only down the road"
"No, I can't do that... he gets really cross... " ( )

I go through the sequence of operations and sure enough the alarm is set.

"Hey, that's it... the noise has stopped!"
"Yes Frank. The alarm is set. Ok?..... Frank?..... Frank?......"

At this point the phone goes dead. Not so much as an effin' thank you! 

This morning I realised he'd left messages on my mobile running into double figures... no message... just the alarm going off in the background 

[Snoopy]

No pun intended but that rings bells here. I hold keys to two halls in this village and never a week goes by without some twerp forgetting the friggin alarm sequence for one or the other. Got hauled out to the Church Hall last Christmas day because the twat of a Minister left candles burning all round the Church but no-one wanted to tell him!
I am not even first, second or third call out. I just happen to have keys because I use the halls and I publish the local village magazine ~ so they can all find my number.

[Misunderstood]

No pun intended but that rings bells here. I hold keys to two halls in this village and never a week goes by without some twerp forgetting the friggin alarm sequence for one or the other. Got hauled out to the Church Hall last Christmas day because the twat of a Minister left candles burning all round the Church but no-one wanted to tell him!
I am not even first, second or third call out. I just happen to have keys because I use the halls and I publish the local village magazine ~ so they can all find my number.

The clue here is in the "I can't call the other guy 'cos he gets really mad".

You - both - need to get a little madder than he/they do/es.

[Snoopy]

Yeah but ~ In a small community it is usual to help people out like this. We may moan but we'd be even more pissed off if they didn't ask because we were "crabby b@st@rds".

[Pastis]

True Snoopy, very true.

In my case what is so exasperating is that the guy has been using the place for over six months now on a weekly basis and still has problems setting the effin' alarm 

I'll probably be seeing him on Monday night so, as Bouncer puts it, I might be giving him a piece of 'not happy' 

I might suggest tattooing the number sequence on the back of his hand    You know, somewhere he won't forget it.

[Snoopy]

True Snoopy, very true.

In my case what is so exasperating is that the guy has been using the place for over six months now on a weekly basis and still has problems setting the effin' alarm 

I'll probably be seeing him on Monday night so, as Bouncer puts it, I might be giving him a piece of 'not happy' 

I might suggest tattooing the number sequence on the back of his hand    You know, somewhere he won't forget it.

Suggest he tattoos it on his dick then 

[Barman]

True Snoopy, very true.

In my case what is so exasperating is that the guy has been using the place for over six months now on a weekly basis and still has problems setting the effin' alarm 

I'll probably be seeing him on Monday night so, as Bouncer puts it, I might be giving him a piece of 'not happy' 

I might suggest tattooing the number sequence on the back of his hand    You know, somewhere he won't forget it.

Suggest he tattoos it on his dick then 

Depends on how long the sequence is... 

[Snoopy]

Such things are usually four digits BM ~ just about enough for the average w@nker to cope with I'd have thought.