Sickies

[Nick]

I too have refused to work for some clients on the grounds that they are arseholes. Miss Whiplash will never enjoy my services again, even though this is the single biggest contract I have ever had. Life is too short.

[GROWLER]

I assumed that Mrs Growler could do that for you.

Yea. Right!

Tickle my tummy!

[Nick]

I thought she was some sort of therapist. Evidently doesn't work on you!

[GROWLER]

I thought she was some sort of therapist. Evidently doesn't work on you!

NOWT she does werks on me....apart from a bottle of single malt p'raps?

[Nick]

I must get Mrs Nick to have a word with her!

I like to spread misery around

[GROWLER]

I must get Mrs Nick to have a word with her!

I like to spread misery around

Where you actually wearing kecks at your weddin'?

YOU, sadly, are 1 of many downtrodden husbands i know.

Everyone wonders how I get away with what i do.

Quite simple really. Just be a GROWLING twat in a permanent bad mood.

[Nick]

We both were!

[Nick]

I must get Mrs Nick to have a word with her!

I like to spread misery around

Where you actually wearing kecks at your weddin'?

YOU, sadly, are 1 of many downtrodden husbands i know.

Everyone wonders how I get away with what i do.

Quite simple really. Just be a GROWLING twat in a permanent bad mood.

I am fine and bold all day. When Mrs Nick gets back I turn into a shivering wreck

I have thought of electric shock therapy for her, but it seems too mild...........

[The Moan Ranger]

People who take sickies are all bastards too 

[Snoopy]

Feel better now?

[Mr Happy]

I'm taking one Monday.

My boss hasn't completed a full week since finding out she was pregnant 4 months ago.  Excuses have included, i kid you not:

Swollen Ankles 3 days
Antenatal Swimming Class 2pm leaves X 6
Scans (5 to date bloody papparazzi)
Midwife Appoitment (4 hiurs weekly)
Stomach Complaints (It feels like it's getting bigger)
Feeling Sick (then admitting on phone that she was getting no rest because someone was fitting carpets)
Blurred Vision

In the time she has been in she's questioned my attitude (and was told to f off in front of 12 of both of our inferiors) and failed to submit my overtime for two months running.  She also failed to carry over 4 of my holidays, hence sicky!

P.S to further my defence I work for a big faceless organisation and most work involves taking delivery of shite, duplicating and passing onto next muppett, 75% of the people don't need to be there anyway!!!

[Nick]

P.S to further my defence I work for a big faceless organisation and most work involves taking delivery of shite, duplicating and passing onto next muppett, 75% of the people don't need to be there anyway!!!

Name and shame. Truth be told, this applies to most large orgnisations. Mrs Nick works for one. It's like a vast game of pass the parcel

[GROWLER]

In the time she has been in she's questioned my attitude (and was told to f off in front of 12 of both of our inferiors)

Keep running that bit through me 'ed, and I still don't gerrit.

[GROWLER]

P.S to further my defence I work for a big faceless organisation and most work involves taking delivery of shite, duplicating and passing onto next muppett, 75% of the people don't need to be there anyway!!!

Name and shame. Truth be told, this applies to most large orgnisations.

I worked for British Gas for 20 years.
Great workforce (plebs  ), but totally shit, control freaked overly self important way above their station management in the main. 95% utter utter tossers.
All they could do was spout targets and tell you that "if it's too hot in the kitchen, GET OUT!"
Mmmmm, nice. How to get the best out of your workforce ey?

[Darwins Selection]

I worked for British Gas for 20 years.

Meter-Theft division?