Think positive? My fat arse.

[GROWLER]

I've come down with yet ANOTHER bastard cold man flu for the 5th time this year.
Picked it up from GROWLER jnr I reckon, who was quite poorly with it last week, and all the associated shite that comes with it.

At the time, i said i'd catch it, and all Mrs GROWLER could say was, "think positive, and you won't. You always think the worst will happen, so it will"
Correct, she was right.

Her answer for not catching it then was to, "think positive"....like SHE the almighty bloody authority on these matters does.

She's reluctantly complaining of having what appears to be the start of a cold this morning, when I caught her quietly and secretly taking a couple of Paracetomol.

[Nick]

Is this the same "think positive" person whose place of werk has been boarded up?

[GROWLER]

Is this the same "think positive" person whose place of werk has been boarded up?

If you're talkin' about the 'hut' in the car park in the  'village of the interbred' then yes. 
They have however moved to new premises at the 'little' version of the 'village of the interbred' a mile up the road.

[Uncle Mort]

How on earth can 'thinking positive' stop you from catching a virus? After all, that virus doesn't care if you're an optimist or pessimist.

There was a recent study on cancer sufferers that showed thinking positive made no difference to their survival rates.

Of course once you are ill you can decide whether to wallow in your misery or just get on with life.

[GROWLER]

How on earth can 'thinking positive' stop you from catching a virus? After all, that virus doesn't care if you're an optimist or pessimist.

I'll p'raps put Mrs GROWLER on here tonight to explain her 'theory'?
I'm used to it U.M.
She talks utter shite all day long most of the time.

[Nick]

Runs in the family then....

[Snoopy]

Many people believe in "positive thinking" and that it will help them avoid various illnesses. Some even believe it will help them to succeed in their chosen career ~ as in "Every day I shall get better and better".
Personally I think nature has this sorted. Mothers, I have noticed over the years, have an apparently built in immunity to most of the ailments their children bring home from school. They also have to "get on with it" when they do catch something whereas children (and in fact males of any age) can take to their beds and "suffer" loudly.

[Nick]

One thing I discovered when The Boy arrived is that you are not allowed to be ill. Ever!

[GROWLER]

Runs in the family then....

 

[Nick]

Maybe Mrs Nick and Mrs Growler could shack up together and you could move in here. They would be allowed to visit for sexual purposes only.

[GROWLER]

Many people believe in "positive thinking" and that it will help them avoid various illnesses.

Well doesn't this just prove then what a load of old shite THAT theory is then ey?

On the career side of things, well that's different, and I'm a firm believer in it.....for the self employed at least.
Being EMPLOYED is however a different matter, and invariably depends on the size of yer cock and just how high you can wave it.

[Snoopy]

I can see it now. 

[Nick]

That's Growler at the back!

[GROWLER]

They would be allowed to visit for sexual purposes only.

Ey? 

[Snoopy]

That's Growler at the back!

I know ~ and you in the pinny.