That scientology thingy..

[Barman]

Sorry barkeep she only does the techie stuff, she sorted out my betamax a treat the other day

Well, if I can get the dish pointing roughly towards the satellite again I?ll give you a call?

[Uncle Mort]

I watched the programme last night and those scientology chaps are truely scary.

To be honest I'm not sure that John Sweeney really lost his temper, he just seemed to be trying to make the scientologist, Tommy Davis, just listen for a second.

I did the scientology introduction course way back in 1972 and I remember finding them as very focused, very controlling people. That Tommy Davis certainly had that control.

I only did the one course and would have not even completed that except there was a very cute girl on the course as well. Also I could see that the follow ups were going to be very expensive, something the programme touched upon.

It's definitely a cult rather than a religion.

[Grumpmeister]

Having watched the program and remembering the sci fi pulp novels of Hubbards I read as a kid I now have a cunning plan. 

First come up with some demented self help plan, then create a relligion arouond it (must ask Nick for input on that as he is the pub's expert on cataclysmic happenings).  Finally flog it to gullible americans for $100,000 a shot.

I'll never need to work again.  eyes:

[Nick]

My immediate reaction is that there is a gap in the religion market. The range of divinities and sacred beings ranges from vengeful creators, through pantheons to sacred cattle, via fire worshippers and volcano freaks. No one, not nowadays as far as I know, sees WIND as anything divine, except in certain metaphorical sense ("Breathe on me breath of God etc.") Oh, and perhaps Pentecostalists a bit. (I believe there is a church in Watford run by the "Pillar of Fire Socety", but they are obviously mad as a bag of frogs)

A religion basedon WIND would offer a range of worshipping opportunities encompassing gentle breezes (just reminding you it is here) up to Hurricane Katrina (punishment for making too much music andf having fun - all religions share disapproval of fun as a common thread).

Question is, how to make money out of it!

Wind farms? Must have a think about it.

[Darwins Selection]

My immediate reaction is that there is a gap in the religion market. The range of divinities and sacred beings ranges from vengeful creators, through pantheons to sacred cattle, via fire worshippers and volcano freaks. No one, not nowadays as far as I know, sees WIND as anything divine, except in certain metaphorical sense ("Breathe on me breath of God etc.") Oh, and perhaps Pentecostalists a bit. (I believe there is a church in Watford run by the "Pillar of Fire Socety", but they are obviously mad as a bag of frogs)

A religion basedon WIND would offer a range of worshipping opportunities encompassing gentle breezes (just reminding you it is here) up to Hurricane Katrina (punishment for making too much music andf having fun - all religions share disapproval of fun as a common thread).

Question is, how to make money out of it!

Wind farms? Must have a think about it.

Will this wind, be so mighty. . .

[Barman]

My immediate reaction is that there is a gap in the religion market. The range of divinities and sacred beings ranges from vengeful creators, through pantheons to sacred cattle, via fire worshippers and volcano freaks. No one, not nowadays as far as I know, sees WIND as anything divine, except in certain metaphorical sense ("Breathe on me breath of God etc.") Oh, and perhaps Pentecostalists a bit. (I believe there is a church in Watford run by the "Pillar of Fire Socety", but they are obviously mad as a bag of frogs)

A religion basedon WIND would offer a range of worshipping opportunities encompassing gentle breezes (just reminding you it is here) up to Hurricane Katrina (punishment for making too much music andf having fun - all religions share disapproval of fun as a common thread).

Question is, how to make money out of it!

Wind farms? Must have a think about it.

Will this wind, be so mighty. . .

[Grumpmeister]

I supose if you want a way to market it then you would have to start by looking back at how religion started in the first place.

Picture prehistoric man sat around a fire. Now from their point of view fire is good, it gives them warmth, light and cooks their food. It moves and 'eats' wood so there probably isnt much of a leap to thinking that it is alive. Once you reach that point it most likely wouldnt take to look at them in a godly way and worship it. Once you have that as a foundation the belief would become more complex as the psychological and emotional development of man requires more out of those beliefs.

[Nick]

So how can we build this around wind?

Good wind: fresh air = life
Bad wind: makes a mess, makes cycling difficult (wind against you in every direction), blows your house down, breaks things

Not looking too good so far.

Maybe we could try water instead?

[Grumpmeister]

Hang on Nick, firstly who is going to be your target audience/culf followers/victims. Work out their dependencies and then you should find it easy.

[Bar Wench]

In my experience wind is always smelly.























See told you that the farting emoticon would come in handy! But noooooo you had to get rid of it!

[Barman]

In my experience wind is always smelly.

You were right ? we should have kept the fart emoticon? who?d have thought it? 

[Nick]

Hang on Nick, firstly who is going to be your target audience/culf followers/victims. Work out their dependencies and then you should find it easy.

Stupid people of course. Preferably rich stupid people

[Darwins Selection]

Hang on Nick, firstly who is going to be your target audience/culf followers/victims. Work out their dependencies and then you should find it easy.

Stupid people of course. Preferably rich stupid people

Rich, stupid, dippy kind of people?

[grumpyoldsoldier]

What about us poor stupid people?  We need religion too, this is bloody discrimination. Only the rich can afford proper medical attention, only the rich can afford the law, now they are nicking the last bastiion of the por working classes,  religion. Who can we afford to  worship eh?... Barman, how much is that Bishops Finger? Maybe we can worship that

[Grumpmeister]

If they are rich enough to pay for it and stupid enough to believe whatever we come up with then so be it.

Church of the Exploding Badger?
Church of the Apocalyptic Lawnmower? (actally that is already copyrighted)

Any other suggestions