In search of the Golden Sprout

[Snoopy]

Mrs S vanished to the supermarket this morning at 0730  "For last minute things".
She took a dim view of my suggestion that she would be elbowing old ladies to one side, barging past the infirm and unsteady trying to be the one to locate the "Golden Sprout" ~ in fact she said "What the F*ck are you on about?" and I had to explain that all the people that she would encounter, be jostled and made angry by, were all caught up in the great retail myth of the Golden Sprout that can only be found by one lucky customer on Christmas Eve. Why else are they all there queuing to get in when they have had weeks to do the shopping?
"But we need cream" she wailed
"Then why did you not ask the milkman to deliver some my sweet?" I asked
I am not sure what exactly she said in reply as her teeth were tighly clenched but the last word I heard was clearly "Off" 

[Barman]

Mrs S vanished to the supermarket this morning at 0730  "For last minute things".
She took a dim view of my suggestion that she would be elbowing old ladies to one side, barging past the infirm and unsteady trying to be the one to locate the "Golden Sprout" ~ in fact she said "What the F*ck are you on about?" and I had to explain that all the people that she would encounter, be jostled and made angry by, were all caught up in the great retail myth of the Golden Sprout that can only be found by one lucky customer on Christmas Eve. Why else are they all there queuing to get in when they have had weeks to do the shopping?
"But we need cream" she wailed
"Then why did you not ask the milkman to deliver some my sweet?" I asked
I am not sure what exactly she said in reply as her teeth were tighly clenched but the last word I heard was clearly "Off" 

The milkman's cream is off? 

[Snoopy]

Mrs S vanished to the supermarket this morning at 0730  "For last minute things".
She took a dim view of my suggestion that she would be elbowing old ladies to one side, barging past the infirm and unsteady trying to be the one to locate the "Golden Sprout" ~ in fact she said "What the F*ck are you on about?" and I had to explain that all the people that she would encounter, be jostled and made angry by, were all caught up in the great retail myth of the Golden Sprout that can only be found by one lucky customer on Christmas Eve. Why else are they all there queuing to get in when they have had weeks to do the shopping?
"But we need cream" she wailed
"Then why did you not ask the milkman to deliver some my sweet?" I asked
I am not sure what exactly she said in reply as her teeth were tighly clenched but the last word I heard was clearly "Off" 

The milkman's cream is off? 

Nooooooooo ~ I don't think so .... what she said was much shorter than that. 

[Snoopy]

She has returned with 8 (Eight) bulging carrier bags, she has not found the Golden Sprout and, as I have just pointed out, has forgotten the coffee filter papers that were one of the items she stressed "Had to be bought". 

Reaction to my helpfulness = 

I am, obviously, typing this in the shed. 

[Darwins Selection]

She has returned with 8 (Eight) bulging carrier bags, she has not found the Golden Sprout and, as I have just pointed out, has forgotten the coffee filter papers that were one of the items she stressed "Had to be bought". 

Reaction to my helpfulness = 

I am, obviously, typing this in the shed. 

You should know by now that they revert to the feral state at this time of year.

It is like expecting a cat not to chase a bird, they will buy the unwanted and forget the vital things.

I have a barn to hide in. 

[Snoopy]

She has returned with 8 (Eight) bulging carrier bags, she has not found the Golden Sprout and, as I have just pointed out, has forgotten the coffee filter papers that were one of the items she stressed "Had to be bought". 

Reaction to my helpfulness = 

I am, obviously, typing this in the shed. 

You should know by now that they revert to the feral state at this time of year.

It is like expecting a cat not to chase a bird, they will buy the unwanted and forget the vital things.

I have a barn to hide in. 

I know DS ~ but it's such fun to wind them up isn't it? I have a bottle of decent port secreted in the shed for just such eventualities and another in my office ~ it seems to work as well as the valium 

Meanwhile she has driven off at speed with a post-it upon which is written Coffee Filters ~ bet she forgets them again.

[Nick]

Bedlam here. I keep finding urgent reasons to go out. Mrs Nick still wandering about in pyjamas, which caused her problems when some visitors turned up unexpectedly a few minutes ago. And Marmite has diarrhoea

Growler is buying a round in one of the locals later, so I shall have to "pop out" again then

[Miss Demeanour]

I went to do mine yesterday and it can only be described as pure hell.

This was topped off by the fact that once I had finally loaded all my goodies on the conveyor belt some tart with a handbag / suitcase over her shoulder turned round to bellow something at her beloved and knocked off my Balsamic vinegar from the belt. The bottle smashed and she had vinegar all up her. Bloody hell did she curse but she friggin caused the accident.

As if this attention seeking behaviour was not enough I was half way through loading all my crap when the conveyor belt stopped. This was not caused by a mechanical fault but by the till operator picking up my bottle pf bubble bath and squeezing it hard enough to deposit most of its contents on the belt.

"Cleaner to Aisle 28 " scenario followed.

Idiot boy comes along with a mop and bucket and then takes a soaking wet cloth to start  scraping up the goo. As you can imagine that just caused such a mess 

Not going back ever again....this should help the January diet 

[Snoopy]

As said many times before "Life is too short for supermarkets" and I use Asda and Tesco home delivery services. Why then, just because it is Christmas and despite 4 deliveries in the past ten days from the above combination of stores did SWMBO think today was a good day to go to Morrisons? Beats me.

Oh and yes she did fail to get the coffee filter papers again.

[Marley's Ghost (Imbiber of Spirits)]

As said many times before "Life is too short for supermarkets" and I use Asda and Tesco home delivery services. Why then, just because it is Christmas and despite 4 deliveries in the past ten days from the above combination of stores did SWMBO think today was a good day to go to Morrisons? Beats me.

Oh and yes she did fail to get the coffee filter papers again.

Tried them - too many unavailable items and daft substitutions. Now use Ocado - much better.

[Snoopy]

As said many times before "Life is too short for supermarkets" and I use Asda and Tesco home delivery services. Why then, just because it is Christmas and despite 4 deliveries in the past ten days from the above combination of stores did SWMBO think today was a good day to go to Morrisons? Beats me.

Oh and yes she did fail to get the coffee filter papers again.

Tried them - too many unavailable items and daft substitutions. Now use Ocado - much better.

One uses that which is available old chap. If I still lived in Town I expect Fortnums would get some of my hard earned.

[Nick]

Mrs Nick has just set off shopping AGAIN!!

[Miss Demeanour]

No delivery slots were available - hence I had to go and do battle

[Snoopy]

Mrs Nick has just set off shopping AGAIN!!

FFS! They open again on Thursday 

[Snoopy]

No delivery slots were available - hence I had to go and do battle

P.P.P.P.P.P