The Future Bride
LL Tennyson
And on the 24th May this year
Miss Piggy was more fair than words can say;
Barefooted to the alter came the Bar Man
As sooth all his cash had then been spent 
But before the sighing gathered crowds
In shiny new and lovely dress
To meet and greet her on her way;
‘It is no wonder,’ said the lords,
‘Miss Piggy is more beautiful than day.’
As shines the sun on this happy day
Miss Piggy in her swanky attire was seen:
One praised her boobs 
, one her eyes,
One her fair hair and lovesome mien.
So sweet a face, such angel grace,
In all that land had never been:
Mr. Sparky then sware a royal oath:
‘This porcine maid shall be my wife!’
AHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh - much better ! 
I don't think anyone has every written a poem about me before - well not to my knowledge anyway!
Yes indeedy folks, WonderMum (aka LL) has indeed come to my rescue and sorted out the stupid woman from the WD shop.... (will make sure I take pictures of LL in said WonderMum attire!)
Stress levels are now gradually decreasing and normal service will resume shortly....
As for that "mummy look" LL was talking about - jeez
...beware any of you that ever encounteer the wrath of LL....that stare is enough to melt steel
(it's even worse than being shouted at and that is pretty scary itself!)
Thanks to all for your practical (and sometime not so practical) comments!! Rest assured there will be no more Miss Piggy tantrums this end!
