LADY drivers. Draw a little diagram on a Post-it showing the position of the hand brake and gearstick, and stick it to your dashboard. This will save you having to look for them when the lights go green.
PUBLIC toilet users. When you realise the person in the next cubicle is holding fire until you leave, simply open and close the toilet door without leaving. Their first plop can then be greeted with a huge cheer.
Shoe bombers. Increase your payload by becoming a clown.
LADIES Whentreating genital thrush, always ensure you use natural bio-yoghurt and not raspberry flavoured Munch Bunch.
