Help me, men only to read this post

[Barman]

You wife has almost certainly been knocked-up by her 'personal fitness instructor' at the Gym... 

[markwoods39]

Tricky things wimmin ..... they say these things to get you off balance ~ then they hit you with either (i) a big dent in the car (ii) request for a divorce (iii) A plan that involves moving house/building an extention to your house/ the news that their mother is moving in with you.
Your only hope is to (i) Give up drinking and eating +plus join a gym and get rid of the man boobs (ii) agree to everything and have a nervous breakdown or (iii) flee the country under an assumed name.

Good Luck ... I speak for all the chaps here, we are behind you all the way. 

Oh Thanks Snoopy i took you advice alright.

I went into town and found a man called jim, i told him i had to join jim to lose my man boobs . With a great big grin he said follow me so i did. The next thing i knew we was in the woods, and he said now is the time to join jim i have to meet him every day now in the woods at 1pm for 1 hr work out   I feel something not right here

[Snoopy]

Like I said Mark ..... We are behind you all the way.

[markwoods39]

Like I said Mark ..... We are behind you all the way.

 rubschin:Ummm you know this jim to then snoopy 

[Nick]

flee the country under an assumed name.

And get to the airport in plenty of time

[Barman]

flee the country under an assumed name.

And get to the airport in plenty of time

[grumpyoldsoldier]

Hey where my icons???? I demand them now OMG seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee i demanding now

All will happen once you reach ten posts .... as if by magic your eleventh post will display your emoticons and uploaded pictures on demand. Until you get there you have a limited range of smileys you can use.
Suggest you post some more deathless prose and get the numbers up.

See they work if I "quote" you.

 

Suggest you post some more deathless prose and get the numbers up.

  Its the way you tell 'em Snoopy