How the bloody hell did he sleep through that?????

[Grumpmeister]

Its a given that birth is bloody painful for the woman so how the hell did this muppett manage to sleep through her screaming. I heard some women giving birth when I was a student nurse and they were loud enough even medicated up to the eyeballs. 

A man slept through the birth of his first child, only to be woken when his girlfriend walked in with the baby in her arms.

Antony Probets carried on sleeping as his girlfriend Gemma McSheffrey went on to have the couple's baby girl all on her own.

Gemma, 20, said: "I was screaming for Antony all the time but he was fast asleep so I did it all on my own.

"Then I walked into the bedroom with the baby in my arms."

She added: "Antony is a very heavy sleeper. I can never wake him and he's always the last one up."

Antony, 19, a chef in Elland, West Yorkshire, where the couple live, said: "I thought I was dreaming at first so that's why I didn't wake up.

"When I realised it was real I was so shocked."

He added: "I'm sad because I wanted to be there for the birth but I am so proud of Gemma."

The couple had gone to Calderdale Royal Hospital after Gemma, started having contractions.

But staff sent them away because the first-time mum was still only in the early stages.

Gemma said: "When we got home my contractions started getting worse.

"The next thing I knew my waters had broken. I had a really big urge to push so I did and half her head was out."

Two more pushes and less than 10 minutes later little Paige Elizabeth Probets, weighing 7lb 3oz, popped out at 6.30am.

Gemma, who works on a fruit and vegetable stall, had not been to ante-natal classes.

She said: "I was absolutely terrified because I didn't have a clue what to do but I didn't want the baby to become distressed.

"Friends who have had babies said it really hurt but I didn't have time to think about the pain."

Gemma wrapped the baby in her dressing gown and headed back to the bedroom where her boyfriend was sleeping.

"I said 'Antony you need to get up now' but he didn't really function for about five minutes. It was actually Paige that woke him up crying."

The new dad got to cut the cord before they headed to hospital with the ambulance crew.

The couple who have been together for 11 months, brought baby Paige home on Friday.

[Snoopy]

 

And from wife and daughter 

[Nick]

I once slept through a five car pile up outside our house which involved, as part of the rescue, 3 fire engines, 2 ambulances, 4 police cars and a crane!!

[Grumpmeister]

I once slept through a five car pile up outside our house which involved, as part of the rescue, 3 fire engines, 2 ambulances, 4 police cars and a crane!!

Surely that is a normal occurence in Nickworld though? 

[Nick]

No. Why do you ask?

[Grumpmeister]

No. Why do you ask?

Just figured you would have become immune to the constant barrage of calamities and catastrophies in your life by now allowing you to sleep through them all at night.

[Snoopy]

Mrs S#2 once slept through an earthquake.
Mrs S#1 often gave the impression of sleeping through my most ardent lovemaking 

[Nick]

Mrs S#2 once slept through an earthquake.
Mrs S#1 often gave the impression of sleeping through my most ardent lovemaking 

Nice word.Ardent

[Bar Wench]

I sleep through anything. I once slept through Brother Wench falling down the stairs and shouting for help.

[Grumpmeister]

Mrs S#2 once slept through an earthquake.
Mrs S#1 often gave the impression of sleeping through my most ardent lovemaking 

I take it that the earth didnt move for Mrs S#1 then. 





Sorry Snoop couldnt resist 

[Snoopy]

Mrs S#2 once slept through an earthquake.
Mrs S#1 often gave the impression of sleeping through my most ardent lovemaking 

I take it that the earth didnt move for Mrs S#1 then. 





Sorry Snoop couldnt resist 

After ten years of marriage I took to calling her "My Sleeping Beauty" ~ everytime she felt a prick in her hand she was out like a light!

[Barman]

Mrs S#2 once slept through an earthquake.
Mrs S#1 often gave the impression of sleeping through my most ardent lovemaking 

I take it that the earth didnt move for Mrs S#1 then. 





Sorry Snoop couldnt resist 

After ten years of marriage I took to calling her "My Sleeping Beauty" ~ everytime she felt a prick in her hand she was out like a light!

[Snoopy]

Mrs S#2 once slept through an earthquake.
Mrs S#1 often gave the impression of sleeping through my most ardent lovemaking 

I take it that the earth didnt move for Mrs S#1 then. 





Sorry Snoop couldnt resist 

After ten years of marriage I took to calling her "My Sleeping Beauty" ~ everytime she felt a prick in her hand she was out like a light!

She asked me after the divorce why I had called her "My Sleeping Beauty" .... I told her

[Barman]

Mrs S#2 once slept through an earthquake.
Mrs S#1 often gave the impression of sleeping through my most ardent lovemaking 

I take it that the earth didnt move for Mrs S#1 then. 





Sorry Snoop couldnt resist 

After ten years of marriage I took to calling her "My Sleeping Beauty" ~ everytime she felt a prick in her hand she was out like a light!

She asked me after the divorce why I had called her "My Sleeping Beauty" .... I told her

How long did the bruising take to heal?

[Snoopy]

Months! Talk about