Author Topic: More Top Tips  (Read 115215 times)

0 Members and 10 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline Just One More

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 26767
  • Reputation: 0
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #330 on: December 03, 2014, 07:34:15 AM »
IF YOU have a stutter, refrain from saying the word 'ghost'. Otherwise people will think there is one behind them.

LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Just One More

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 26767
  • Reputation: 0
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #331 on: December 03, 2014, 07:34:51 AM »
HUGELY improve the processing speed of your PC by burying your head in your hands and whispering "Come on, for fuck's sake."   :thumbsup:


LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Just One More

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 26767
  • Reputation: 0
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #332 on: December 03, 2014, 07:35:25 AM »
REDUCE preparation time when making a spicy vegetable & quinoa laksa by simply buying a bag of chips & getting over yourself.

LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Just One More

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 26767
  • Reputation: 0
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #333 on: December 03, 2014, 07:35:55 AM »
A WHOOPEE cushion filled with gravy adds a hilarious new dimension to a rather tiresome practical joke.

LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Just One More

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 26767
  • Reputation: 0
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #334 on: December 03, 2014, 07:36:44 AM »
Save money at Christmas by returning last year's cards to the sender with the simple inscription "Same to you".

Apey  :thumbsup:

LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Just One More

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 26767
  • Reputation: 0
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #335 on: December 03, 2014, 07:37:11 AM »
REGISTER with Groupon if you too enjoy deleting eight emails every morning.

LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Just One More

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 26767
  • Reputation: 0
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #336 on: December 03, 2014, 07:37:42 AM »
FEELING lonely/bored? Just change your Facebook profile picture to that of an ultrasound scan.

LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Just One More

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 26767
  • Reputation: 0
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #337 on: December 03, 2014, 07:38:10 AM »
RECREATE the experience of listening to Radio 1 by putting saucepans into a tumble dryer while a stranger fails to make you laugh

LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Just One More

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 26767
  • Reputation: 0
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #338 on: December 03, 2014, 07:38:38 AM »
RECREATE a family “Come Dine With Me” by rummaging through your mother’s knicker drawer then slagging off her apple crumble.

LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Just One More

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 26767
  • Reputation: 0
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #339 on: December 03, 2014, 07:39:05 AM »
DOUBLE the battery life of an iPhone by putting the fucking thing down
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Just One More

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 26767
  • Reputation: 0
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #340 on: December 03, 2014, 07:39:49 AM »
Increase the post count on s.....oh, AFFS  lol:
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Barman

  • Administrator
  • Needs to get out more...
  • *****
  • Posts: 154172
  • Reputation: -50
  • Since 1960...
    • Virtual Pub!
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #341 on: December 03, 2014, 07:41:27 AM »
happy001

Especially....

Quote
HUGELY improve the processing speed of your PC by burying your head in your hands and whispering "Come on, for fuck's sake."

 redface:
Pro Skub  Thumbs:

Offline Just One More

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 26767
  • Reputation: 0
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #342 on: December 03, 2014, 07:48:52 AM »
happy001

Especially....

Quote
HUGELY improve the processing speed of your PC by burying your head in your hands and whispering "Come on, for fuck's sake."

 redface:

 redface:  redface:  But it works every time like  redface:  redface:  redface:
LiFe - It's an "F" in lie

Offline Barman

  • Administrator
  • Needs to get out more...
  • *****
  • Posts: 154172
  • Reputation: -50
  • Since 1960...
    • Virtual Pub!
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #343 on: December 03, 2014, 07:54:10 AM »
happy001

Especially....

Quote
HUGELY improve the processing speed of your PC by burying your head in your hands and whispering "Come on, for fuck's sake."

 redface:

 redface:  redface:  But it works every time like  redface:  redface:  redface:

 lol: lol: lol:

It is exactly what I say too.... I must have read it in a manual somewhere....  rubschin:
Pro Skub  Thumbs:

Offline apc2010

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 66187
  • Reputation: -2
Re: More Top Tips
« Reply #344 on: December 03, 2014, 08:55:13 AM »
 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D